by Kyra Quinn
“What? Goddess no. There’s nothing between me and Aster. We met earlier today.”
A sigh of relief escaped Morrigan’s mouth as her shoulders relaxed. “I’m so sorry. You must think I’m such an idiot.”
“I may not know the situation between you and Aster, but I know love is complicated. We wouldn’t spend so much time talking about it if it were otherwise.”
The air of confidence in my voice impressed even me. I had to be the worst person alive to ask about love. I’d never so much as kissed anyone besides my adoptive family. Father had strict rules about courtship before the age of eighteen, not that I had much opportunity to meet people in my age range. I’d read books about romance, heard stories from older women at holiday festivals, but I’d experienced nothing akin to it first-hand.
“I’m sorry to ask, but would it be possible not to mention any of this to Aster?” Morrigan brought her hand to her chest to fiddle with the slim silver band she wore on a chain around her neck. “I don’t want her to read anything into it.”
I agreed, though I didn’t quite understand the request. Whatever their history, the sorrow in Morrigan’s eyes suggested I was better off not knowing. “Does she know you came in here?”
“She asked Everit to stand by the door, but he took off as soon as I got here. I don’t think Aster realizes how many bridges she burnt when she left the coven.”
I had enough class not to pry into Aster’s love life, but the new temptation was a different story. I arched a brow and softened my voice. “She has said little about it, but I sense it didn’t go well. I don’t want to ask her what happened if it’s a painful memory, but…”
Morrigan took the bait. “Not surprising she doesn’t want to talk about it. I wouldn’t either if I screwed over the people I called family. I understand why she did it. But you have no idea how much it hurt to discover she’d taken off in the middle of the night without so much as a goodbye.”
The bitter edge in Morrigan’s tone filled in some blanks. I flashed her a sympathetic wince and said, “I’m sorry. I’m sure she didn’t mean to hurt you.”
A sarcastic laugh bubbled from Morrigan’s lips. “Oh, I’m sure you’re right. That’s half of the problem, though. I’m sure she didn’t think about me once when she made her decision. That hurts the most. I never could have been so indifferent towards her feelings. I thought we meant more to each other. I guess she didn’t want to look me in the eye and confess to what she and Chay did.”
“I thought Aster left because she didn’t approve of the way the coven used magic?”
Morrigan scoffed. “Of course she’d try to spin it that way. Aster will always say whatever makes her sound the best. Did she try to claim we were the ones making moonlight deals with the demons to raise the dead? Or swear she shared no blame in what happened to her sister?”
My blood went cold. “What? I don’t understand—”
“Which is why Madre asked you to wait here. It’s complicated.” Morrigan puckered her lips as she searched for an explanation to pacify me. “Feyfolk worship different deities. Unlike most covens, we don’t worship the shadows. We serve the Goddess Namis on our quest for truth and knowledge. We obey strict rules to separate dark magic from evil. Aster broke every one of those rules the night she ran away.”
My chest went hollow. “Why?”
“Aster is a difficult person to know. She lets no one in.” Morrigan shook her head, her gaze distant. “No one knows what she was thinking. She’s always had this habit of doing well for a while before she switches into self-destruct mode and burns her life to the ground.”
I chewed my lip as I tried to make sense of the new information. The logical part of my brain knew Aster couldn’t be as perfect as she appeared, but the weight of her crimes was more than I’d expected. I had no way to verify Morrigan’s information, but the lovesick note in her voice suggested I didn’t need to. As heartbroken as Aster left her, Morrigan would still take her back in an instant.
“I should go.” Morrigan’s eyes shifted towards the door. “This isn’t where I want Aster to find me.”
“I understand. I know it’s not why you came but thank you for keeping me company for a little while. I get the sense everyone else is put off by me.”
Morrigan’s face softened. “I’m sorry. I think it’s the wings. They’re not a thing you see down here in the Grove.”
My cheeks warmed. “Not sure what I can do about that yet. They didn’t show until the lady upstairs pushed me down a hole.”
Morrigan laughed as she glided towards the door. “You seem like a clever girl. You’ll figure it out. Good luck with everything.”
I wished Morrigan the same. She slipped out of the room and shut the door, leaving me alone in Aster’s creepy caricature of a bedroom once more.
It took Aster an eternity to return. I busied myself with counting the tiles on her bedroom ceiling as I mulled over the conversation with Morrigan. Had I made a mistake with Aster? Why had I placed so much trust in someone I hardly knew?
No answers came by the time the bedroom door swung open. Aster marched into the room and slammed the door behind her. Her voice was icy as she spoke. “Come on, we’re leaving.”
I blinked. “What happened?”
“Doesn’t matter. Madre refuses to help us. We need to make it back to Carramar and reconvene with your friends.”
“But—”
Aster whirled on me with her teeth bared as fire blazed in her cold eyes. “Did I stammer? We came here for a singular purpose. Madre has declined our request. There is no reason to stay. We’ll meet back up with the angel and revise our strategy from there.”
A soft tap appeared on the door. Aster’s eyebrows shot up her forehead as she marched across the room. She ripped the handle open in a fury, Morrigan on the other side. Shit.
“What are you doing here?” Aster’s eyes narrowed in suspicion. “Come for an apology?”
Morrigan snorted. “I know better than to expect one. This has nothing to do with us. I overheard part of yours and Madre’s argument. I’ve come to help.”
Aster took a step back to allow her into the room. “How?”
Morrigan moved her hands from behind her back to reveal a thick, dusty hardcover book. The edges of the pages had browned with age, the spine cracked. “I grabbed this from the shelf in Madre’s room while you had her distracted. I’ve already thumbed through it. It has every spell a mage might ever dream of.”
“Is that-—”
Morrigan nodded. “The Forbidden Texts. She’s hid this in plain sight for years. I think only I ever spotted it.”
Aster’s hands shook as she reached for the book. “Are you certain this is the real thing? There are rumors of countless duplications and rip-offs floating through the dark market over the years.”
“This is different. You can feel the energy in you change when you touch it. Here. If you tell anyone where you got it, I’ll murder you myself.”
Aster grinned as she clutched the book against her chest. “I always loved it when you talked dirty.”
I cleared my throat to remind them they had company. “I’m Lili. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”
To her credit, Morrigan didn’t miss a beat. She plastered on a smile and wiggled her fingers. “I’ve heard a lot about you, Lili. It’s nice to put a face to the name. My name is Morrigan. I’m an old friend of Aster’s.” She shot Aster one last pained glance and added, “I’ll leave you ladies to it.”
“Wait.” Aster reached for her arm. “Thank you. I know I haven’t given you a great reason to care about me. I guess, perhaps, what I’m trying to say is, well—”
“It’s okay.” Morrigan rested her hand on top of Aster’s. “I accept your apology.” She blew Aster a gentle kiss and glided out of the room, the cracks in her armor invisible.
Aster clutched the book to her chest. She stared at the door long after Morrigan disappeared with glossy eyes. I bit the inside of my cheek as I tried to
decipher the look on her face. Did part of her still yearn for her past life? Or did a hidden guilt still haunt her behind her cold, confident smile?
After a moment, Aster sighed. “We need to head back. Madre won’t be happy when she discovers we took this book.”
I didn’t see why anyone would make such a fuss out of a few hundred sheets of parchment, but any excuse to leave Starbright was good enough for me. My skin crawled more with each minute passed in the Grove. As much as Remiel and Viktor annoyed me, I longed for the familiarity of their smug faces.
“Can we still make it back to Carramar in time?”
“The translocation spell will have us home in a flash. I can’t zap us into the living room, but I can get us to Carramar. The side effects may hit a little harder here, though. The wards here in The Grove weaken my connection to my magic. I hope you didn’t eat anything while I was away.”
She raised the stick above her head and closed her eyes. Her voice changed in pitch as she cried, “Exspiro!” and slammed the butt of the stick against the floor. An electric blue light shot out from the ruby on top, the room bathed in color. A shimmering sapphire portal appeared on the front of the closet door.
“Hurry, go!” Aster cried, her voice winded.
I shot a glance over my shoulder towards the door to ensure we had alerted none of Aster’s old friends. When the door remained closed, I took a deep breath and stepped over towards the vertical pit of stars. I kept my head high and wings perked as I reached for the portal.
Carramar, here we come.
*
Remiel and Viktor stood in front of Aster’s door with matching scowls by the time we arrived. To say her transportation magic needed work was an understatement. We stepped out of the portal and into the woods on the border of Carramar, a lofty hike away from Aster’s apartment. I’d suggested a couple dozen times we test out my new wings to save time, but Aster had been adamantly against the idea.
We spent what remained of our night trudging through the woods until the dull ache of my feet made me want to sever them at the ankle. Never again would I accept fashion advice from Aster. I opened my mouth to ask her if I could use my powers to ease pain the way they healed wounds. The sight of Viktor and Remiel made me swallow the question.
“You’re late,” Remiel said, his voice short. “We assumed you betrayed us.”
“And gone where?” Aster chuckled. “There’s not a single place in Astryae they won’t follow Lili. We found that out in Starbright. Our only option is to face this head-on.”
“That much we agree on.” Viktor eyed Aster with suspicion.
“You must be the friend.” Aster flashed Viktor a warm smile. “I’ll admit, I had expected another angel. But you’re a little more special, aren’t you?”
Viktor’s cheeks flushed with color. “Let’s not do this now. You’ve proven your point.”
Aster pressed a hand against her chest as she feigned innocent. “Point? I don’t know what you mean. I’ve never seen a wolf shifter without a pack, let alone playing second fiddle to an angel. Must be because you are not just any shifter, right?”
“Enough.” Viktor growled. “Is there a plan or not? From what Remiel and I discovered, we have little time to waste.”
“Wait, you’re a what?” I blurted out before I could stop myself. Something about being the last to find out Viktor’s secret made my blood run hot. “And not once have you used that to our advantage?”
Viktor’s eyes narrowed as he glared at me. “Because you were so forthcoming? I don’t owe you the intimate details of my life. And you don’t need them to accept my help.”
“Is the new plan to stand outside all night and wait for the demons to find us?” Remiel asked. “Save the petty stuff for later and move.”
Aster pushed the door open and ushered us into the house, the book still clutched to her chest. She’d spent a good portion of the trek home with her head buried between the pages, her eyes squinted as she attempted to read by moonlight. I didn’t ask her if she’d found anything, afraid to interrupt her concentration. I said a silent prayer the strange book would deliver the secrets we needed.
As soon as the door shut, Aster’s face broke into a smile. “I don’t know what sort of night you gentlemen had, but Lili and I ran smack into fate.”
Remiel’s eyes drifted down towards the book. “Is that—”
“It is. And it has the spell we need.” She crossed the room towards the altar. “It has every dark spell ever known to creation. The magic comes at a steep price, but there are no free favors in life.”
My hands wrapped around my stomach. A single spell from the book could consume what little soul Aster had left. What would happen to her when she had nothing left?
“This is a terrible idea.” Remiel glowered in the corner. “The gods don’t visit Astryae anymore for a reason. This planet and all its inhabitants are more disappointment than they can stand to look at each day. Osius won’t react well to being summoned from the Gardens. Especially not by anyone in current company.”
Remiel had a point. Between the fallen angel, the blood mage, the shifter, and the...well, whatever I was, none of us had the cleanest of hands. The odds of a god responding well to demands from us were about as high as my chances of waking up a normal girl again.
“That is where the book comes in,” Aster said. “If we must, there’s a spell in here with the power to kill anything. Even a god.”
Remiel’s mouth dropped. “Tell me that is an attempt at humor.”
Aster flipped the book open and scanned the pages. “I never said it’s our best option. I said if something forces our hand. If all goes well, we will never need to use it. We need to make Osius aware we have the ability. The gods can’t turn their backs to Astryae forever.”
Remiel’s eyes darted between Aster and Viktor. “No. I care not what your little book says. There is no magic anywhere in Astryae with the power to kill our creators. The mere suggestion will spiral him into a blind rage. If we plan to do something this foolish, we should at least be smart about it. There is a lot more to this than either of you realize.”
Remiel launched into an explanation of our time apart. He and Viktor took turns summarizing their chat with the banshee woman and her ominous warnings. When they finished their tale, my determination doubled.
I chewed my thumb until the edges around the nail bled. “Humans can’t see the angels and demons, right?”
Aster nodded. “Not unless they have the Sight. Both races apply potent glamor spells when they visit this realm.”
“So if Viktor’s friend is correct and a war between the two comes to Astryae, only the mages will see the threat?”
“And those are all but extinct.” Viktor gave a slow nod. “Most people will not understand what hit them until it’s too late.”
“We can’t let it happen.” I folded my arms over my chest. “Thousands of innocent people will die for a war they have no stakes in.”
Remiel’s face darkened. “We cannot stop fate. If the banshee is right and war comes to Astryae, the best thing we can do is try to protect the people here. Nothing will slow its arrival.”
“We can’t stop it, but Osius can.”
“Did you lose your sense when you gained those wings?” Remiel shot me a pointed glare. “Osius isn’t on our side. He’s one of the most savage gods in our universe. Astryae is nothing but a tiny blip on the map of consciousness to him. Summoning Osius will solve nothing. We need a better plan.”
But it was our only plan, and I didn’t intend to let it slip through my fingers. The more Viktor and Remiel told me, the more my resolve strengthened. I placed a hand on Aster’s arm. “Gather the supplies. Let’s start as soon as we can.”
“Aster, do not perform this spell.” Remiel placed his palms together in front of his chest. “Think about how much of your soul magic this corrupt will cost you. Can you afford to spare so much of your humanity?”
Aster’s eyebrows drew togethe
r, her nostrils flared. Remiel had chosen the wrong trigger to manipulate. “Because you have a better idea of where to find redemption? Either assist us with the preparations or take your leave.”
A long pause elapsed before Viktor caved. “What do you need from us?”
Aster glared at Remiel as she answered. “We need to gather supplies. Either help me or stay out of the way.”
CHAPTER NINETEEN
The Gray Scale of Morality
Viktor followed Aster through the empty backroads of Carramar. He squinted against the blinding light of the morning sun. His body remained tense as he held his pace a few steps behind hers. His hands itched to draw the sword from his back as the mage sauntered through the streets with a pep in her step.
“You should wash up when we reach my flat,” Aster called over her shoulder. She wrinkled her nose. “You smell like a wet dog.”
A bitter taste flooded Viktor’s mouth as he swallowed back the urge to snap at the saucy sorceress. She had no part in Celia’s death. She didn’t deserve to bear the burden of his grief.
His throat tightened as Celia’s glassy eyes flashed through his mind once more. He’d trusted his words when he assured Remiel the shadows had no interest in anyone but Lili. How had they found Celia? And what reason did they have to kill her?
Viktor shook his head and tried to force himself to focus on the task at hand. It didn’t matter why. Celia was gone, and he had only himself to blame. Well, himself and the demonic bastards who stabbed her.
But why would a demon attack with a knife? Why didn’t I detect any sulfur?
“You’re quiet,” Aster mused. “Not what I would have expected after meeting your friend.”
“What are we looking for?”
Aster chuckled. “I see you share his conversational talents. Follow me. We’re almost to the school.”
Viktor arched a brow. What sort of magical ingredients did Aster expect to find inside of a schoolhouse? A small chill ran down his spine.
“Are we in need of a chalkboard?”
Aster’s face darkened. She stopped her hike and leaned against the side of a faded brick building to study him. She bit her bottom lip between her teeth and sighed. “You won’t like this.”
