by E. M. Fitch
“It’s a cop,” he said sullenly, jogging down the stairs. He reached the door before Cassie got to the hallway. A burst of cool air flowed up the stairs, bringing in a dead leaf from last fall, a brittle, orange thing that spun once and then fell to the hall carpet.
“Mr. Buckner,” Officer Gibbons called out. Cassie’s tension lowered at the deep timber of his voice. “Can I come in?”
Cassie called for him to come in just as Ryan said, “Sure thing, I was about to leave anyway.”
“Wait, you don’t have to,” Cassie said, hurrying down the stairs. Ryan nodded but put his coat on anyway.
“I’ll talk to you tomorrow, Cassie,” he murmured, offering a half-hearted wave as he strode out the still open door. Her shoulders sagged as Officer Gibbons shut it behind him.
“Are your parents home?” Gibbons asked, looking down the hall toward the kitchen. Cassie’s chest caved in, watching Ryan yank open the door to his car. Her eyes drifted toward the hall clock. There was still plenty of time before curfew went into effect. She wondered if he’d stop at Jon’s. “Miss Harris?”
“Hmm? Sorry. No, they won’t be for,” Cassie paused, eyes reflexively traveling to the clock again, “about half an hour, I guess. Want dinner?”
He looked surprised and then shifted his weight, looking from the empty kitchen to Cassie. It might have been weird to ask him to stay for dinner, something inside her knew that, but with a sudden flare of anxiety, she hoped he’d say yes. If this was just a routine check-in, he’d leave pretty quickly and then she’d be alone. She had been counting on Ryan staying for dinner, but now he was gone for the night.
“I don’t want to impose,” Officer Gibbons started. Cassie seized the opportunity.
“You’re not. It’s stew. Mom had it going in the Crock-Pot, so no biggie.”
He followed her to the kitchen, looking acutely uncomfortable. She pointed to the kitchen table and he sat, shifting his large belt. He was in uniform today. She grabbed a couple of bowls and ladled good-sized portions of the beef stew her mom had left simmering throughout the day. She placed his helping in front of him, offering a fork across the table before sitting with her own bowl.
“You weren’t at the school the other day. You know, with the birds,” Cassie said, watching him carefully as he took a bite of his dinner. He chewed for a moment before answering.
“No, I wasn’t.”
“Did you hear about it?”
“Sure did.”
“Do you think it was one of us?” Cassie pressed.
“Actually, that’s what I came here to ask you about,” he said, looking up at her. He caught her eye and held it, as though waiting for the truth to come pouring out. Cassie stood firm. He was no different from Ryan. Both had been close to the creatures of the forest, neither had seen what was right in front of them. Cassie telling them about it would only make her seem crazy. “You’re scared of something, Miss Harris. I’ve been trying to figure out for a while just what it is that’s terrifying you.”
“Two of my best friends are dead—”
“From heart conditions. You know this. We’ve talked about it. Is it the men? The kidnapping carnies that you insisted for so long existed?”
“They do exist! I wasn’t lying!”
The betrayal that lanced through her caught like a physical blow. First Ryan, now Officer Gibbons. All these months she had thought he had been a kind of friend to her, and now here he was, accusing her of lying. He didn’t believe her when she first told him about the night Jessica died. Now here he was practically saying he never had believed her about the men who took Laney.
“I never said you were lying,” he said, pointing a dripping fork in her direction. “I’ve stood up for you more than you know. Don’t you know they wanted to haul you in over that paint job? Especially after seeing you all in the car across the street watching the next morning? But I told them there was no way it was you—”
“It wasn’t!”
“—and the graveyard, why are you still going there? Officer Hawkins told me he chased you kids out of there. What are you hiding, Miss Harris?”
“I’m not hiding anything,” she said through gritted teeth. She slammed her fork down on the table, glaring across the worn surface.
“I can’t help you if you won’t tell me,” Gibbons said, watching her. She deflated a bit, her fingers uncurling from her utensil.
“I saw the Evans bothering my neighbors the other day,” Cassie said, changing topics. Gibbons stared silently across the small space, his fork hovering in the steam over his bowl. With a subtle narrowing of his eyes, he allowed her conversational diversion.
“Jessica Evans’ parents?” Gibbons asked after a moment, taking a bite of the stew Cassie had served him. He chewed for a moment and then motioned to his bowl with the fork. “This is good. And we talked with Linda and John Blake. They called. They just want to be left alone.”
“I wish the Evans would leave them alone then,” Cassie muttered, forcing herself to eat a bite of her dinner. Gibbons nodded.
“They want them on their side, two grieving families and all that. As if the town doesn’t have enough incentive.”
“Did you find out anything about that goat?”
At this question, Gibbons looked surprised. He eyed her warily. “Which one?”
Cassie’s eyebrows shot up on her forehead. She swallowed the bite she had just taken. “The one that was killed, obviously. Which one did you think I meant?”
“The one that threw your principal all over the auditorium,” Gibbons answered with a frown. “Small town. I always forget. And you know I can’t disclose anything. How did you hear about that?”
Cassie shrugged. “My dad.” She let him have another few bites in silence before speaking up again. “So what do you think about the birds in the gym?”
Gibbons looked thoughtful, staring at the wall over Cassie’s shoulder for a moment, gravy dripping off his fork into the bowl. For a short, insane moment, Cassie wanted him to know everything. She wanted to tell him, and have him believe her when she did, about Aidan and how he was following her. She wanted someone to understand that there were creatures out there who could control the trees and command the forest animals. She wanted to feel not so alone. It only lasted a moment, then the realization hit. He would never believe her; he might try to lock her away in a looney bin if she even attempted to explain it right. She pressed her lips together hard, her appetite disappearing.
“Seems to me it was a pretty freak occurrence. According to your principal, animals have found their way in there before. Maybe your school should work on keeping their doors shut.”
Cassie offered a weak smile and nodded, turning her eyes to her cooling dinner.
“My dad doesn’t think there’s anything going on either,” Cassie said. She spoke softly, her eyes on the table. “Just a couple of copycats, he said.”
“And do you think that’s what’s going on?”
“No,” Cassie answered sullenly. She was no longer hungry, the meal looked suddenly unappetizing. She pushed her bowl away. Officer Gibbons seemed to be done as well. His hands were steepled in front of him over the half-eaten bowl. He regarded her seriously from across the table.
“Is there someone else out there, Miss Harris?” he asked. “Someone we maybe don’t know about yet?”
Cassie stood up from the table. “Do you want coffee?” she asked, moving toward the coffee maker. She hit the power button and the soft whirring of the machine heating up filled the empty silence. Cassie made two cups, not bothering to wait for his reply.
She offered him cream or sugar but he declined, sipping the black liquid without any adjustments. He continued to eye her from across the table, making her acutely uncomfortable, until she quite literally sighed with relief when she heard the front door open.
Her parents were surprised to see Officer Gibbons eating dinner in their kitchen, looking to their daught
er in concern.
“I invited him to dinner,” Cassie offered, smiling haltingly.
“Just wanted to chat, see how your daughter was doing,” Officer Gibbons said. He stood with a grunt after he drained his coffee cup. “The stew was excellent. Thank you.”
He moved to the door, accompanied by Cassie’s father. Cassie stood and grabbed his bowl, moving with it to the sink. She could hear her father’s low tone in the hallway.
“You don’t think she has anything to do with any of this, after all that last year?”
“No, I don’t,” Gibbons answered, shifting his weight. Cassie could hear the floorboards creak underneath him. “But someone’s involved. And I think your daughter knows who.”
The next morning, one week to the day, a freshman came forward, claiming responsibility for the vandalism. Cassie had no idea who coerced him into it, and no one seemed to really believe it was him. Instead of suspicious looks and glaring, Cassie saw the silent nods of thanks offered whenever Samuel Phillips passed any of the older students in the hall. Lara had been one of them, so excited to be back in formal practices, she didn’t care who took the fall.
It was sick, but Samuel Phillips was more popular now than he had ever been before. Cassie had certainly never heard his name before Monday morning. Suddenly, the school was buzzing with it.
“Did you see? That kid, Sanfred—”
“Samuel! What the hell is a Sanfred?”
“The cops were here, took him away.”
“Think he did it?”
“No way!”
Cassie was sure he’d be brought right back to school. How would he explain the blood? Vandalism he’d get charged for, but not held. Graffiti would be a slap on the wrist, but she thought there must be actual consequences for slaughtering an animal and using its blood. There had to be. It would be so obvious that it wasn’t him, there would be no way the police could charge him with anything.
But Samuel wasn’t brought back to school that day. It wasn’t until the end of school that Cassie even found out what happened. The police came back to talk to Mr. Rossi. Word spread quickly through the teachers and secretaries. Apparently, Samuel admitted to the vandalism and graffiti, but claimed to have found the goat already killed in the forest.
“He’s swearing that he didn’t kill that goat. I heard the cops telling Rossi,” Miss Keller had whispered over the main office front desk as Cassie waited for her father to check his mailbox in the back.
“It still doesn’t make sense though!” Cassie burst out. “They really think a freshman was able to set such a detailed fire? Is he some kind of pyro genius or something?”
“His parents offered to let him take a lie detector test and everything,” Miss Keller continued through a shrug. “They obviously believe Samuel played a part in it. Who knows if the cops will make him do it. But I know this kid, he helps around here with the copies and things.”
“Your work, you mean?” Cassie said, trying to ease herself out of annoyance. The banter felt a little forced to Cassie, but Jane Keller didn’t seem to notice. She threw her a dirty look before breaking off with a smile.
“That’s exactly what I mean. He’s a decent kid! Doing hard, hard labor.”
“Sure, real tough,” Cassie said, forcing a smile.
“Not the type to do what they said he did,” Miss Keller finished. Cassie’s father appeared, walking toward the front desk. Jane’s voice went very formal. “Have a good night, Mr. Harris. Miss Harris.”
“You too, Jane,” Cassie threw back at her. Her father frowned at her as he walked ahead. Jane Keller stuck out her tongue at Cassie after her father had walked past.
Samuel Phillips was charged with vandalism and released to his parents to await sentencing. Despite the fears, voiced by the parents and teachers, whispers of cults, animal sacrifices, and devil worshipping, he’d be back in school in no time.
Softball practice resumed that evening. Coach Kelly wasted no time in getting word out to her players. She gave them all one hour to get home, get their gear, and find a way to get back to the field. Cassie and Rebecca had spent the better part of the afternoon trying to find seniors who could offer rides to the underclassmen, most of whom would have had no other way to get back to the school.
Even though she knew it was technically a good thing that softball was starting back up, a well of disappointment had flooded in Cassie. She had wanted to corner Ryan, get a chance to talk to him. She still felt awful about the other night.
The thought, the possibility of telling Ryan, was still swimming around in her brain. She did want to tell someone, she recognized that she needed to. Alone with this anxiety, it was eating her up. Her thoughts would race at times, the words tripping over themselves in her mind. Her chest would tighten out of nowhere, no cause she could identify. Panic just flared and overcame her, locking her muscles into rigidity, her brain into a tangle of flying words. She felt like she was going crazy, like she was back in the forest and Aidan was speaking inside her skull, confusing his words with hers.
She had no outlet, no one she could trust to believe her. So she kept it quiet, calming the mess of screaming words in her head with deep breaths and the promising thought of exercise.
Ryan showed up at the field at the end of practice. He leaned on the fence until Coach Kelly called for all the girls to pack it up.
“You have a lot of admirers,” she said to Cassie, nodding toward the dugout. Lara and Sara made kissy faces, moaning to illustrate their point. Joanie giggled.
“True, Coach,” Rebecca said. “But this one actually is an admirer. Still need that ride, Cassie?”
Cassie shook her head, hoping it was true and that Ryan would offer to take her home. She threw her dusty catcher’s gear in her bag, ignoring the laughter from behind her. Ryan smirked as she jogged in his direction until she threw him a look.
“I thought maybe we could talk for a minute,” Ryan said. He smiled but it faltered. Cassie’s heart leapt to her throat. She couldn’t help it, those words always triggered that reaction in her. The sudden thought of losing the only best friend she had left, coupled with the constant anxiety that had plagued her lately, made her drop her bag to the ground. She stared up at him, trying to decipher the meaning behind his eyes. His face was a mask of uncertainty.
She needed to tell him. Everything. He had to know, just in case he was trying to do something drastic, like leave her.
He might leave her anyway, once he knew just how crazy she was. But at least this way, she would have been honest about it.
She moved to the gate, slipping through so that she was on the same side of the fence that he was. They walked to the edge of the chain-link barrier and across a small expanse of worn grass, coming to rest against the side of the school building. He leaned against the brick, waiting for the rest of the girls to pack up and leave. Just around the corner, Cassie could still hear the Varsity baseball team’s practice, a rhythmic crack of bat on ball and the periodic thwack! as ball met glove followed by a masculine grunt.
The last girl waved goodbye just after Rebecca passed them. She patted Cassie’s arm on the way and Cassie shot her a nervous grin. She looked up to Ryan expectantly once Rebecca was out of sight.
“I wanted to say I was sorry,” Ryan started. Cassie’s breath left her in a quick sigh.
“You’re not ditching me?” she blurted out before she could stop herself.
“What? No,” Ryan exclaimed, kicking off the wall and stepping closer to her. He reached forward and wrapped his arms around her biceps, squeezing affectionately. “Of course I’m not. Why? Is that something you—”
“No!” Cassie said in a rush. “No, I don’t want that. I just thought, when you said we needed to talk … ”
“Oh,” Ryan said, chuckling. “No, just that I’m sorry I walked out on you the other night. Did Gibbons stay until your parents got home? I know you don’t like to be left alone.”
“
You do?”
“Of course,” he said, staring down at her in concern. “Where do you think I’ve been the past few months? Right beside you, next to you all the way. You get that, don’t you?”
“I know you have been, you’ve been wonderful,” Cassie murmured. Her eyes started to tear and she broke free from his hold, swiping at her face in impatience. She still felt broken, too broken to be functional. “I’m sorry too, I’ve been a mess. I don’t know how to even begin putting myself back together.”
“You’re doing a pretty good job of it,” Ryan murmured. The way his voice had gone low and husky made Cassie look up again. “You know how much I care about you, right?”
She nodded as his mouth lowered to hers in a gentle kiss. She moved forward, lifting herself up on her toes to kiss him more firmly. His mouth moved over hers with an intensity that took her by surprise.
“Wait,” she said between kisses, overly conscious of the grime and dust that had built up on her skin throughout practice. “I’m all dirty.”
“Don’t care,” he mumbled, kissing her hard. She squeaked as he spun her around and pinned her back against the side of the school. She let herself fall back, a smile playing on her lips, even through the kiss. She braced against the cold, rough brick as Ryan’s lips opened above her own, warm and soft. Cassie closed her eyes against the trees that swayed behind him, the clouded sky, the blue gaze that stared from the edge of the forest.
Cassie tensed and her eyes flew back open. Ryan left her mouth and pressed kisses down the column of her neck, obviously not sensing her distress. A crop of golden hair, highlighted by the dying sun, shone over a set of piercing blue eyes that watched her from the tree line across the softball field.
The entire baseball team was around a corner only a hundred yards away, people still milled about inside the building she was pressed against. Ryan was there, over her, shielding her. Aidan couldn’t steal her away, not here, not with so many people in screaming distance.
But he could watch.
