by Elena Graf
“Where are you?” asked Maggie’s voice. Liz smiled. She was barely out of sight, but Maggie was already checking on her.
“I just got on 95.”
“How are the roads?”
“Not bad. They’re plowed and sanded.”
“Good,” said Maggie. “Be careful.”
“I will be. Call me when you hear from them.”
“I will. Love you.”
“Love you too.”
Maggie hung up.
Liz was suddenly ravenous. She felt around in the foil-wrapped packages and her hand found some of Maggie’s caramelized onion-and-feta tartlets and her tangy cheese puffs. Sometimes, Liz teased Maggie that she had married her for her cooking. There might be some truth to that, but certainly, it wasn’t the only reason. Liz’s hand rooted around in the warm foil and found some of Fred’s savory stuffed mushrooms. She popped one into her mouth. It was just enough to satisfy her hunger. Despite her pleasure in the wonderful tastes, she decided not to gorge on all the goodies. She’d save the cold canapes and tea sandwiches for later. She’d need to pace herself to keep up her energy.
Opera seemed too intrusive after Maggie’s call, so Liz switched to orchestral music. Anything but Christmas carols. She hated them with a passion only because by Christmas she was oversaturated with them and wanted to plug her ears. The popular songs no longer recalled happy memories of childhood; only of being mobbed by shoppers in the Maine Mall.
She came up to two plow trucks driving side by side and decided to keep her distance. The reduced speed sign was flashing as she came to the overpass, so she let up a little on the gas pedal. Yes, this was going to be a long trip.
She wondered what she would encounter when she got to the airport. Maggie had mentioned that there were problems in her daughter’s marriage. After the birth of her second child, Alina had quit her job as a news producer to become a full-time mother. She’d been the breadwinner in the family, so it had put a burden on Jeff to make a living from app development. He’d had to get a second “real” job as a web designer to help make up the difference.
Liz remembered Alina’s first visit to Maine, when she had witnessed the young woman’s panic attack after she had abruptly stopped her antidepressants. Alina was being treated for PTSD from her early childhood in an overcrowded Romanian orphanage. What a challenge it must have been for Maggie and her husband to raise two abused orphans, but Maggie had proven herself as a mother. Her daughters were not only functional but accomplished. Her elder daughter, Sophia, had become a doctor and had recently finished a pediatric oncology fellowship.
Liz ate the last of the hot canapes. They were just barely warm at this point, but she savored every bite. She took a swig from her travel mug. Fortunately, the coffee was still scalding hot, just the way she liked it. She ramped up the windshield defrost because the temperature had risen since she’d crossed the New Hampshire line, and the precipitation was now mixed. She could hear the ice pinging against the glass, and the wipers crunching as they cleared a wedge-shaped opening. The poor visibility made her tense. She forced herself to relax the muscles in her shoulders as she did in the operating room during long surgeries.
A telephone call broke through the music again.
“Where are you now?”
“I’m into Massachusetts.”
“You’re making good time despite the weather.”
“Yes, keep your fingers crossed. It’s changed over to freezing rain.”
“Oh, Liz! Be careful!”
“How’s the party going?” asked Liz, listening to the sound of Christmas carols and laughter in the background.
“Brenda headed to the police station. There have been quite a few accidents. My friends from UNE are still here and your partners. Tony and Fred are spending the night.”
“Put them in the downstairs guest room.”
“I will. And I think Alyson and Lynne are going to stay too. Let’s just say they’re having a really good time.”
“Full house. Oh, well. The more the merrier.”
“Liz, stay safe. Call me in half an hour and let me know how you’re doing.”
Liz agreed to call and hung up. She cut the music, deciding the sound of the wipers and the slush in the wheel wells helped her focus better on the road. The temperature had gone down again, and the freezing rain had changed to snow. Fortunately, there were few other drivers, but the heavy snow obscured their taillights until she was practically on top of them.
She was hungry again, so she reached into the insulated bag for a sandwich. She remembered Maggie’s elegant hands preparing them, cutting the crusts off the bread in perfect imitation of the tea sandwiches they’d enjoyed when they’d visited Ireland. One of Maggie’s colleagues at NYU had gotten Irish citizenship through her grandmother and had moved there to retire. Liz and Maggie talked about buying the little cottage on sale down the road. But Liz wanted to travel, not settle down in some Idyllic ocean-side cottage to play out some fantasy of domesticity. She wanted to see the world and make every minute with Maggie count after being separated from her for forty years.
And the cancer.
Liz pushed that thought out of her mind and put on some music as a distraction, tenor opera arias. She didn’t care that she wasn’t a real tenor because she could at least sing along. Forget the soprano roles. They were too far out of range.
Liz became so wrapped up in her singing that she forgot to call Maggie at the appointed time. On schedule, the phone call broke through, interrupting the great trio from Faust.
“Hello, dear,” said Liz.
“You said you would call me!”
“I’m sorry,” said Liz. “You didn’t give me a chance!”
“Everyone left. They’re worried about the weather. Tony and Fred are still here. So are Alyson and Lynne. We’re sitting out on the porch, admiring the tree and drinking mulled wine. We’re all pretty crocked, but that’s okay. We don’t have to drive anywhere.”
But I do, thought Liz enviously. She imagined the cozy scene on the porch, the propane stove burning brightly, the multicolored lights on the tree reflecting in the glass ornaments, and that amazing pine smell. “Don’t get too mellow. You’ll have to deal with the kids when we get back.”
“Don’t worry. I’ll be ready when they come.”
“Are you having fun?”
“Yes, our friends are good company. But I really miss you, Dr. Stolz. I miss feeling your arm around me while we sit on the loveseat, and you can be sure I have plans for you later.” As an actress, Maggie could use her voice as expressively as her face. Her come-hither voice had enormous range.
“Okay, Maggie. I get the picture. No phone sex now. I have to drive and it’s pretty ugly out here.”
“I was afraid to ask.”
“Nothing from Alina yet?”
“No, but Lynne helped find the flights from Tampa to Boston. We’re guessing she’s on the Delta flight landing in about twenty minutes. I checked. It’s still on time despite the weather.”
“Okay text me the flight number and any other flights you think she might have taken.”
“Liz, please, please promise me you’ll be careful.”
“I will be careful. Promise.”
“Drink coffee.”
“Yes, boss.”
Maggie chuckled. “I’ll call you as soon as I hear something from Alina.”
Liz flipped open her travel mug. She smiled when she found the coffee still hot. Although Maggie’s attention could sometimes be overbearing, she took very good care of her.
Liz began to see signs for the airport and knew she had to pay attention. For someone who seldom drove the roads around Boston, navigating could be a nightmare, even in good weather. Fortunately, it was long past rush hour, so traffic was light.
Liz ate her last sandwich and finished her
coffee. She glanced at the clock. She should be in the airport in about fifteen minutes.
A call came through the Bluetooth. “You again!” said Liz, grinning as she tried to sound exasperated, which spoiled the effect.
“I finally heard from Alina. They landed. I told her you were coming to get her. She sounded so relieved.”
“I bet. Tell her to find a restaurant and get something to eat. I’ll be there soon. I have to park and get into the airport first.”
There was a long silence. Liz could tell that Maggie had gone into another room because the background sounds had deadened. “She has very little cash and no credit cards.”
“Why?”
“She left in a hurry. When Jeff saw the alert for charging the tickets to Boston, he canceled all her credit and debit cards.”
“What!”
“I know. It’s terrible.”
“I had no idea it had gotten so bad between them.”
“I did.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“You had so much going on with your mother in the hospital.”
“Maggie…”
“I know,” she said slowly and then sighed. “I really didn’t want to talk about it. Can you understand?”
“Okay, but you could have told me.” Liz hadn’t meant to sound so scolding. “I’m sorry. I understand…sort of.”
There was another long silence. “I’ll tell you later when we have some privacy.”
“Maybe Alina will tell me herself.”
“I doubt she’ll say anything in front of the girls. She’s so protective of them after her own difficult childhood.”
“Listen, sweetheart, I’d love to talk to you, but I have to pay attention to the signs now.”
“She’s going to be waiting for you in the luggage claim area, carousel three. I texted you the information. It’s the Delta flight from Tampa. Oh, Liz, thank you so much for picking them up. What did I ever do to deserve you?”
“That’s a complicated subject. Let’s talk about it later.”
Liz saw the sign for the Delta terminal and took the exit. The short-term lot was full, so she had to park in the much more remote, long-term parking area. She hiked to the shuttle bus stop and pulled up her hood against the wind as she waited. When the bus came, she climbed aboard, passing the passengers dully staring forward as she headed toward the back to claim the only remaining seat. Finally, the Delta terminal was announced. From the shuttle stop, it was a long walk and several escalator rides until she reached the baggage claim area. Another flight was coming in, a large plane from overseas, and the place was mobbed with people with large luggage. Twice, Liz walked back and forth, looking for Alina and her daughters.
“Fuck,” she muttered to herself. “How will I ever find them?”
“Liz?”
Liz turned around. Standing behind her was tiny Alina with an enormous wheeled suitcase and two small girls.
“Alina! I almost tripped over you.”
“Grandma Liz!” exclaimed Katrina and wrapped herself around her leg. Katrina was seven, but tiny for her age. The younger girl, Nicoleta, “Nicki” to the family, looked up and stared.
“Oh, my God. I can’t tell you how happy I am to see you!” said Alina, throwing her arms around Liz’s neck. Her dark hair fell in Liz’s face. It smelled slightly of sweat and anxiety. Alina finally let go, and Liz assessed her mental state in a glance. The sclera of Alina’s eyes was red from crying and perhaps sleepless nights. She was pale. Her mouth was pinched. This was a woman under profound stress.
“Are you hungry?” asked Liz. “Do you want to get something to eat?”
“Starving, but let’s get out of this mad house.”
“Good idea,” said Liz, and pointed to the exit. She wrangled the big suitcase, so Alina could carry Nicki, and herded her little flock toward the door.
A brisk, cutting wind was blowing as they waited for the shuttle bus.
“Mommy, I’m cold,” complained Katrina, who was thinly dressed for the New England weather.
“I know, honey. We’ll be inside the shuttle soon.”
Fortunately, the shuttle van arrived a few minutes later. Liz hauled the big suitcase on board and placed it on the luggage rack.
“Is Mom upset?” asked Alina as Liz sat down beside her.
“She’s worried, of course.”
“I’m so sorry to intrude on you like this.”
“Glad you felt our house was a safe place to go,” said Liz, patting Alina’s hand.
Tears filled the young woman’s eyes. “I didn’t know what else to do. I didn’t feel welcome at Dad’s. His wife has been so strange lately.”
Liz vaguely remembered Maggie saying, with a hint of Schadenfreude, that she thought there were problems in her ex’s second marriage. Liz nodded, but offered no opinion of Barry, whom she still secretly loathed for taking Maggie away forty-five years ago.
“We’re very happy you’ll be spending Christmas with us,” sat Liz, giving Alina’s hand a little squeeze.
Katrina plopped down in Liz’s lap. “Will it be warm at your house, Grandma Liz? It’s so cold here. Not like where we live.”
“I’m sure Grandma Maggie kept the fire going. We were having a party when I left.” Liz opened her parka so Katrina could snuggle close and benefit from her body heat.
They reached the area of the parking lot where Liz had left her truck. She turned on the engine to warm up and arranged the quilt around the girls in the backseat.
“Thanks for remembering the car seats for the girls,” Alina murmured.
“That’s what grandmothers are for.”
Alina nodded solemnly.
Liz climbed into the driver’s seat. “Everybody ready to go to Maine?” she asked with all the enthusiasm of a camp counselor.
“Yeah!” said Katrina.
“Yeah!” Her little sister repeated over and over.
Liz headed for the airport exit. “There are some fast food restaurants on the way to the highway. I’m sorry, but that’s the best we can do at this hour or we’ll waste a lot of time. With this weather, I’d rather get home.”
“It doesn’t matter at this point. Anything edible. We haven’t eaten since this morning.”
“You should have eaten something before you left Tampa.”
“I don’t have any money,” Alina said in a quiet voice.
“So, it’s true he cut off your cards.”
“He didn’t cut them off. He can’t do that. He reported them stolen, but it will be days before it gets sorted out. Meanwhile, I have less than five dollars in my wallet.”
“Don’t worry. You won’t need money at our house, and I can give you some cash.”
At that, Alina let out one pitiful sob. “Thank you.”
Liz sighed and they drove in silence for a few minutes. “How’s the anxiety?” Liz asked.
“Are you asking as a doctor or my stepmother?”
“Both.”
“I’m managing…barely. I wanted to go off the Zoloft during the pregnancy and while I’m breast feeding, but my doctor insisted it was safe.”
“According to the studies, it is. It must be helping. You seem pretty calm.”
“What choice do I have? I have to hold myself together for the girls.”
Liz saw a sign come up for MacDonald’s. “How about we stop here and get you something to eat?”
“Yes, anything. I’m sure the girls are so hungry.”
“I wish I hadn’t eaten all the food your mom packed for me.”
“She packed it for you, not us.”
“She gave me some cookies, but we should save them for after you have some real food.”
“Oh, my God, I love Mom’s cookies,” said Alina.
Liz reached into her lunch box a
nd handed her the bag of cookies. She turned into entrance to MacDonalds and got on the line for the drive-through. “What should I order for the kids?”
“MacNuggets. Fries. Milk. As a doctor, you probably think I’m a bad mother for letting them eat that stuff.”
“The only thing I think is that your kids are hungry. What would you like to eat?”
“I hate MacDonalds, but I’ll have a fish sandwich and fries because I’m so hungry.”
“It’s just to tide you over. Then you can eat your mom’s cookies.” Liz reached over and patted Alina’s arm. “We’ll be home soon, where there’s good stuff to eat. Your mother cooked up a storm for this party. Literally.” She chuckled at her own pun.
The cab of the truck was quiet while everyone ate.
“Your truck will be a mess after the girls eat back there,” said Alina.
“Doesn’t matter. I’ll clean it out later.”
Liz headed to the highway. The snow was getting heavier, and the wind was blowing it around wildly. Liz turned up the defrost and the wipers.
“I’m so sorry to drag you out on such a terrible night,” said Alina.
“You had no way of knowing the weather would be so bad up here.”
A cell phone began to ring. Alina dug in her purse for it. She glanced at the screen. “Hi, Mom. We’re on the way. Just stopped to get the kids something to eat.” Alina listened for a few minutes before saying, “Liz, she wants me to tell you to be careful.”
Liz laughed. “Of course, she does. As if I haven’t heard that a dozen times tonight!”
Alina held her phone to Liz’s ear. “Thanks soooo much for picking them up,” said Maggie. “You have no idea how much I appreciate it.”
***
Maggie heard the clock chime and realized that Liz had been gone for almost five hours. Their houseguests were showing no sign of fading. She was glad that the subject had changed from the sad story of Alina’s failing marriage. Crazed with worry about the people she loved driving through the storm, she had confided her daughter’s sorry situation. If she hadn’t had so much wine, she probably wouldn’t have been so garrulous. Now, she felt slightly disloyal to her daughter, but their friends had been nothing but sympathetic.
