by Jay, Donna
Her gaze landed on Murray’s sandal covered feet. She didn’t dare look up again until she’d dialled a cab and slipped out of the house.
The loud clunk of the garage door as it banged closed behind her made her jump as surely as if she’d been kicked up the backside.
Fifteen minutes later, Kelly turned the key in the door to her flat, never happier to be home. Her glee was short-lived when she flicked on the living room light and came face to face with a sight she never wanted to see, her long-time friend’s backside.
Steve spun around. “Hey, what are you doing home?”
“Bloody hell.” Kelly splayed her fingers across her eyes. “Dude, put some clothes on.”
As if suddenly realising he was stark naked, Steve glanced down. “You like?”
Kelly scoffed. “You’re such a pig.”
He waggled his hips. “I prefer donkey.”
“Yeah, you’re right, you’re an ass.”
Despite knowing Steve loved to play the clown, Kelly was in no mood for jokes. She cut a diagonal path across the living room to her bedroom.
The carpet beneath her feet served as a harsh reminder she’d left her shoes on Paula’s bedroom floor.
“Goodnight, Steve.”
Chapter 2
The following morning, Kelly awoke to her best friend bouncing up and down on the side of her bed.
“Hey, what time is it?” Kelly pried her eyes open.
“It’s after ten; time to spill.” The bed shook as Nicole got comfortable, leaning against the headboard. “What are you doing home? Please tell me you at least got laid before you gapped it.”
Too embarrassed to look her friend in the eye, yet needing to confide in the only person she could, Kelly dragged a pillow over her head. “Yes, I had sex.”
The pillow was unceremoniously ripped out of Kelly’s hands. She was met by Nicole’s inquisitive gaze.
“Why so glum?”
“I don’t know who with.” The confession made Kelly feel worse instead of better. So much for the saying a problem shared is a problem halved .
Confusion knitted Nicole’s brows. “Come again?”
Normally, the double entendre would’ve made Kelly laugh. Instead, she exhaled a heavy breath and the words that had bounced around inside her skull all night came tumbling out.
“Long story short. I had sex with a stranger.” She paused, then added, “Without her consent.”
Bewilderment flashed across Nicole’s face. “Whoa.” She held up a hand. “Back up the bus. What the hell happened?”
Shame flooded every cell of Kelly’s being as she recalled the sordid events from the previous night. Nicole listened without judgement. The look of empathy in her eyes was more than Kelly felt she deserved.
“Okay,” Nicole said as soon as Kelly fell silent. “I’m sure it’s not as bad as you think.”
Of course it wasn’t bad, it was a bloody nightmare. Kelly opened her mouth to say as much but Nicole held up a hand.
“At any time, did she ,” Nicole finger quoted the word, “say no or ask you to stop? ”
Heat flared in Kelly’s cheeks and she hung her head in shame. “She couldn’t.”
“Huh? Why not?”
“I stuffed her panties in her mouth.”
A smile danced across Nicole’s lips. A second later she burst out laughing. “Wow, go you, you horn dog.” She punched Kelly in the arm.
“It’s not funny,” Kelly replied, and she meant it despite the smile she couldn’t suppress.
Nicole fiddled with her robe, unwittingly drawing Kelly’s attention to the belt.
Only able to endure so much humiliation in one day, no way was Kelly going to tell Nicole she’d also tied the woman’s hands to the headboard. Not that she’d done a very good job of it. Apparently, the mystery woman had slipped her wrists free. Yet, she hadn’t pushed Kelly away. Why not?
The shrill beep-beep-beep of the fire alarm broke into Kelly’s troubled thoughts. The acrid smell of smoke wafted into the room.
“Shit, something’s burning.” Pain stabbed at Kelly’s temples as she threw back the bedcovers and scrambled out of bed. Before she made it to the door, Nicole grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her back.
“Steve’s making toast.” She rolled her eyes as if that explained everything. “I’ll go rescue brunch and make some coffee. Once we’ve eaten, we’ll continue this conversation. Because, honey, before you go beating yourself up, we need to figure out who you bonked and what you’re going to do about it.”
What Nicole said made sense. Perhaps the unfortunate woman wasn’t confused and upset thanks to Kelly.
Yeah right, keep telling yourself that, Kel, and you might actually believe it.
While Nicole sorted out Steve and brunch, Kelly grabbed her jeans and a clean T-shirt and headed for the bathroom. She desperately needed pain killers and her toothbrush. Her head throbbed, and her mouth tasted like she’d licked the toilet bowl rather than just puked in it.
She squinted against the bright light and glanced in the mirror. The image looking back at her made her cringe. Her normally vibrant blue eyes peered back at her, bloodshot and lifeless. Her mousey brown hair stuck out in all directions like twigs on a barren tree.
After locating some pain killers, Kelly chugged back two tablets before stepping into the shower. The warm water pounding on her back felt heavenly. Kelly let out a contented sigh and tried to clear her mind. Her reprieve was short-lived.
The second she closed her eyes images of someone, somewhere, trying to scrub Kelly’s scent off their body crashed into her mind. Disgusted with herself, she shut off the water and climbed out.
How had she not known it wasn’t Paula? Sure, it had been dark, but didn’t women taste different, smell different, sound different? Her eyes went wide recalling the words, “Wow, am I dreaming?” No wonder she’d barely recognized the voice.
It hadn’t been Paula’s, but it wasn’t completely foreign either.
***
Back in the living room, Kelly snacked on a bowl of fruit salad and sipped a glass of orange juice. In hindsight, she probably should’ve downed a large glass of water when she’d arrived home last night, it might’ve helped stave off her headache. But thanks to a certain person, she’d avoided the kitchen.
As if reading Kelly’s mind, Steve winked at her. She rolled her eyes and threw a grape at him, delighted when it hit him in the chest.
He looked at Nicole with puppy dog eyes. “Tell your friend to stop picking on me.”
Quick as a flash, Nicole plucked the grape off the floor and dropped it in Steve’s coffee.
“Hey, I was drinking that.” He scowled.
“Children,” Kelly interrupted. “I have a headache.”
Steve leaned back on the big blue sofa and placed his left ankle across his right knee. “Sorry, Mum.”
When Kelly didn’t smile, concern flashed across his face. He dropped his foot to the floor and placed his elbows on his knees, all traces of humour gone. His intense gaze bore into Kelly making her feel like he could see into her very soul.
She’d known Steve longer than Nicole, had introduced them in fact. He was like the brother Kelly never had. Most people assumed she was jealous when her two best friends had hooked up. But they were sorely mistaken, she couldn’t have been happier. She was certain one day they’d marry.
“Wanna tell me what’s going on? Or is it chick stuff?” Steve directed the question at Kelly, his unwavering gaze drilling into her.
Nicole’s silence spoke volumes. It was Kelly’s call whether she wanted to share her story with Steve, and if she didn’t Nicole wouldn’t utter a word of it to him, and Steve wouldn’t press her for information.
Bracing herself, Kelly took a deep breath. “Last night I had sex…with the wrong person.”
A heavy silence hung in the room. Steve turned to Nicole as if she might elaborate. When she lifted a shoulder, he turned back to Kelly.
“How does that
happen?”
How indeed.
Needing to gather her thoughts, Kelly peered out the window. The sun was high in the sky, perfect weather for a ride on her motorcycle. The mere thought of jumping on her Triumph Tiger took the edge off Kelly’s frazzled nerves.
She met Steve’s gaze. “The room was dark. I thought it was Paula.”
Deep in thought, Steve plucked at the skin on his chin. “But it wasn’t?”
“Correct,” Kelly confirmed. “After making out with God knows who, I got up to use the bathroom and ran straight into her.”
The memory of seeing Paula in the hallway sent a violent shudder through Kelly.
“Well, if it wasn’t Paula, who was it?” His confused expression mirrored Kelly’s inner turmoil.
“That’s just it, I have no bloody idea. Some woman is probably in a state of shock right now, all thanks to me.”
Feeling like a disgrace, even though her actions were far from calculated, Kelly buried her face in the crook of her arm. The floodgates opened, and tears streamed down her face.
Before Kelly knew it, Nicole was sitting on the armrest of the chair, stroking her hair and offering words of comfort. Steve crouched next to her on the other side.
He pulled Kelly’s arm away from her face.
“Hey, I’m sure it’s not as bad as you think.” He gave her a reassuring smile. “If I woke up and some girl I didn’t know was riding my boner, I can’t imagine being upset.”
The look on his face was so sincere, Kelly couldn’t find it in herself to be offended, unlike Nicole.
“Steve!” Nicole glared at him. “Don’t be such a pig.”
He poked Kelly in the ribs. “I prefer donkey.”
Kelly chuckled and swiped away her tears. “You’re an ass.”
Pinning his gaze on Nicole, he spread his hands in a placating gesture. “Hey, what can I say? I’m a guy.”
In the time that it took for him to turn his attention from Nicole back to Kelly, he went from smug to serious.
He took Kelly’s hand in his big meaty paw. “I’m not trying to downplay what happened, but I won’t lie, I don’t understand what the big deal is.”
Nicole’s mouth fell open, but before she could berate him, Steve cut her off.
“Before you get your knickers in a twist, I’m going to get out of here so you two can hash it out until the cows come home, because that’s what chicks do, right? Talk about it, talk about it, then talk about it some more.
“In a nutshell, yes,” Kelly said.
Nicole jumped to her feet and gave Steve a peck on the lips. “Glad you know when you’re not needed.”
Witnessing the exchange, Kelly couldn’t have wished for two better friends. She wouldn’t have told Steve to leave, but he was right. Most men couldn’t possibly comprehend what she was feeling any more than she’d ever understand what made men tick.
“And for the record,” Nicole smiled sweetly. “You’ll be a eunuch if I ever find out you’ve let someone else ride your mighty pole.”
Rather than find humour in the comment, an overwhelming sense of guilt crashed into Kelly. No matter how unintentional her actions were, bottom line was she’d cheated.
As much as Kelly needed Nicole as a sounding board, she needed to sort through the jumbled thoughts in her head before she shared the heavy load weighing her down.
Kelly uncurled her legs and stood. “Don’t rush off, Steve. I’m going for a ride. I need to put my head on straight.”
In her bedroom, the sight of her black dress brought her up short. So much for seducing Paula. Actually, it was odd she hadn’t heard from Paula given it was almost midday.
Suddenly, Kelly remembered switching her cell phone to silent when she’d climbed into the cab. She’d been too busy beating herself up since to bother turning it back on. Kelly grabbed her phone off the bedside table. Sure enough, she had four unread messages, all from Paula.
Sighing, she slumped onto her unmade bed and swiped the screen.
Hey, babe. I hope you got home okay?
Kelly’s heart fluttered. It was nice to know Paula was worried about her.
Hopefully the $20 I slipped into your purse covered the cab fare.
For some reason Paula often seemed to think money was the way to Kelly’s heart. To be fair, Kelly never said no, but she certainly didn’t ask for Paula’s generosity.
When you finally wake up and drag your lazy backside out of bed, call me. Not everyone can afford to sleep the day away.
What the hell was that supposed to mean?
With her emotions all over the place, Kelly typed out a quick message. “Sorry, slept in. Going for a ride to the beach to clear my head. Will text when I get back.”
She jammed her feet into her boots and stormed through the living room. Nicole and Steve stepped aside, giving her the space she needed.
Chapter 3
Kicking her bike to life felt good and brought Kelly a sense of peace. She’d ridden since she was old enough to get her license. As a little girl, her father would sit her on his Triumph Bonneville telling her he’d teach her to ride once she was old enough. That was until he was knocked off his motorcycle by a careless driver and her mum declared she was too young to be a widow.
A week later, the Triumph was never seen again. However, Kelly’s desire to ride didn’t disappear along with her father’s beloved bike.
Memories of her dad always filled Kelly with immense joy, or sadness, today it was the latter. Her mother had no way of knowing fate had other ideas for him. Sadly, selling the bike hadn’t been enough to save him from an early grave.
Before Kelly could depress herself any further, she did up her helmet, kicked the bike into gear, revved the throttle, and gunned it for Highway 56.
The stretches of road between Palmerston North and Himatangi Beach were so familiar, Kelly travelled them with ease, always mindful to keep an eye out for motorists who paid little attention to motorcyclists.
It was a beautiful summer day and plenty of Sunday drivers were heading in the same direction as her.
Half an hour after leaving home, Kelly coasted into the parking area at the beach. After shutting off the engine, she flicked down the kickstand, hung her helmet on the handle bars, and turned sideways on the leather seat.
A light breeze drifted in from the ocean bringing with it the familiar scent of seawater.
Kelly inhaled deeply, tension leaving her body. She shrugged out of her leather jacket and draped it over the seat, then placed her elbows on her knees and admired the scenery.
Sand dunes stretched for as far as the eye could see, cars were parked along the beach, teens collected driftwood, kids built sandcastles, and a woman on her horse galloped along the shoreline, its hooves kicking up water.
Eventually, Kelly’s gaze settled on a family sitting on a large blanket, eating fish and chips directly off the paper they came wrapped in. No plates required.
Warmth spread through Kelly as her mind flicked back to many Sundays spent doing the same with her parents and little sister, Joanne. Jo who was now all grown up and attending Victoria University in Wellington.
Watching the father talking to the kids, and pointing to the massive field of sand dunes, Kelly’s mind drifted to her childhood. Her father’s voice came to her as clear as if he was standing behind her.
“That there sand dune field spreads for over twenty kilometres, said to be the largest in New Zealand.”
At the time, Kelly hadn’t paid much attention, but with age she’d learned to appreciate the bits and pieces of information her father had shared about their beautiful country.
When the heat of the sun became too much for Kelly, burning through her black jeans and turning her arms pink, she tossed her jacket on, buckled up her helmet, and headed for home.
After a few hours of inner reflection, Kelly felt optimistic and ready to sit down with her best friend to formulate a plan. Either try to forget about what happened, chalk it up to experience,
or attempt to find the unsuspecting recipient and apologise.
Annoyance shot through her when Kelly spotted a familiar shiny red car parked out the front of their flat. Damn Paula for turning up out of the blue.
It was out of character for Miss Organised, always announce your arrival so you don’t walk in on any nasty surprises, to turn up uninvited.
Without conscious thought, Kelly shot up her elderly neighbour’s driveway, parked around the back and slipped off her helmet. Adrenaline pumped through her veins as she crept toward the back door, trying to stay below the fence line and out of sight.
Mrs Thompson appeared in the doorway shortly after Kelly tapped on the glass panel. “Hello, dear, what brings you here?”
“I thought I’d come by and see if you needed a hand with anything?” Kelly offered up her brightest smile, pleased Mrs Thompson wasn’t aware of the emotional turmoil bubbling just below the surface.
After changing two light bulbs for Mrs Thompson, and sharing a glass of iced tea, Kelly deemed it safe enough to return home.
***
As soon as Kelly stepped foot inside, Nicole bounded toward her.
“Give me that.” She grabbed Kelly’s helmet. “Oh my God, talk about good timing. You dodged a battle-axe.” She smirked. “I mean a bullet.”
Taking the opportunity to have some fun before things turned serious, Kelly played dumb. “Battle-axe’s, bullets, what are you talking about?”
Wide eyed, Nicole tapped her wristwatch. “Paula! She left like two minutes ago. You just missed her.” Her voice was shrill.
“Oh, really?” A smile tugged at the corner of Kelly’s mouth. She’d never been able to keep anything from Nicole for long. “Good thing I hung out with Mrs T. until she left.”
A low growl rumbled in Nicole’s chest. She narrowed her eyes. “Excuse me? You hid next door and left me to deal with your woman?”
The tone of her voice was jovial. She was no more pissed off with Kelly than Kelly would be if the tables were turned. God knew, Kelly had covered for Nicole, more than once, over the years before she’d hooked up with Steve.
“She dropped off your jacket and shoes, grumbled something about you needing to start acting like a responsible adult, sell your bike, and get a real job. I told her she needed to take the stick out from up her arse and accept you for you, warts and all.”
