“Sarah and Adam are my real family,” she said defensively. When she tried to pry herself away from him, he tightened his hold.
“Hey now. All right. I’m sorry for implying they aren’t. And I’m sorry about your parents abandoning you.”
“That’s one way to think about it.”
“One way?”
Looking up at him, she could see the flummoxed expression on his face. “I mean, yeah, I could think that they abandoned me. Th-that they didn’t want me. Or maybe they had to give me up for a good reason.”
His jaw hardened. “What good reason would a mother have for abandoning a cub?”
“I dunno. There could be a lot. Maybe she was young and couldn’t provide for me. Maybe she loved me enough to give me up.”
He snorted. And honestly, that made her smile. Because it was so … Anders.
“Um, I’m sorry I ruined your shirt.” She blushed, looking at the tracks of tears on the white fabric.
“Meh, it’s fine.” His arms dropped to his sides. “You ready? I think Adam nearly fainted when he saw you open a can of whoop-ass on that dickhead.” He grinned. “Remind me never to piss you off, by the way.”
“Ha! You better not.”
She followed him out of the bathroom to the reception area where Adam waited for them, along with the other volunteers. There was also a police officer in uniform there, interviewing them. Darcey stopped, her heart thudding loudly in her chest. Oh no.
“… Yes, Officer Nealy,” Betty said in her sweetest voice. “When Mr. Howard came here to try and take Janine, a big bird came from nowhere and started attacking him.”
Nealy raised a brow. “A bird?”
“Uh-huh. Cross my heart, officer.” As she did the sign, her gaze caught Darcey’s and she winked.
“I think it’s that time of the year,” Mary added. “When the geese from Canada pass by during their migration. You know how vicious those birds can be.”
Nealy huffed. “Right.” He asked them a few more questions before he was satisfied. “Thanks for your cooperation, ladies, I’ll be in touch.” With a tip of his hat, he headed out toward the exit and left.
Darcey looked at the two older women gratefully. “Thank you.”
“No, thank you, Darcey,” Betty said. “You did good, child.”
“We should get going, it’s getting late,” she said. “Adam?”
“Yeah, yeah. Thanks, Miss Betty, Miss Mary,” he said. “We’ll see you soon.”
“Bye now,” Betty greeted.
“Drive safe,” Mary added.
“I’ll walk you to your car,” Anders said.
“You don’t—”
“C’mon, Darce,” Adam huffed. “We don’t have all day.”
“All right, all right.” She bit her lip. “Let’s go.”
They headed out to the parking lot, toward the accessible van that they had borrowed from Daniel’s parents. Taking the key fob out of her purse, she opened the door. As Adam slid into the back seat, she turned to Anders. “Don’t worry, I won’t be volunteering here,” she began.
“It’s fi—”
“No.” She held up a hand. “It’s too dangerous for me.” It was technically the truth, but she didn’t dare elaborate on why. “Adam might want to come back, and Sarah or I will drop him off and pick him up. But otherwise, you don’t have to worry.”
“Darcey—”
“No, it’s fine. I’ll find something else. There’s a senior center on the other side of town, maybe I can do something there.”
He muttered something under his breath.
What was the matter now? “Excuse me?”
“I said,” he took a deep breath. “Don’t come on Tuesdays.”
“Tuesdays?”
“It’s bingo night,” he said. “And I’m the host.”
It was a wonder her jaw didn’t literally dislodge from her skull and drop to the floor. Who the heck was this man? “Fine. No Tuesday night volunteering.” She blew out an exasperated breath. Was there anything else she needed to know about his secret life? Did he save puppies from burning buildings? Help blind people across the street? Rescue kittens from trees? “Goodbye, Anders.”
“Bye, Darcey.”
She slipped into the driver’s seat and started the engine. “You okay back there?” she asked, looking up at the rearview mirror to meet Adam’s gaze.
He gave her a thumbs-up. “Yup, all strapped in.”
Putting the van in reverse, she pulled out of the handicap parking spot. Much to her surprise, Anders hadn’t moved at all, but continued to stare at the van. Right at where she was sitting. Her cheeks warmed, thinking of that oddly intimate scene in the bathroom.
“You know,” Adam began as she maneuvered the van out of the lot. “I kinda like him.”
She slammed on the brakes. “You what?”
“Whoa there!” Adam chuckled as he steadied himself. “And yeah, I do. He reminds me of Daniel.”
“Excuse me?” Was Adam insane? “He’s nothing like Daniel. Daniel is polite and nice. The perfect gentleman. Anders is rude and—”
“No, not like that.” Adam rolled his eyes. “Anders … he doesn’t treat me different; you know? Like I’m made of glass or a porcelain egg or some shit. He’s not afraid to tell me I’m being a dumbass when I’m acting like one, just because I’m in a wheelchair.”
Her brother’s words made her pause. Had it really never occurred to her or Sarah that maybe Adam wanted to be treated like any other kid? Because of his disability, they’d coddled and hovered over him. She swallowed hard. They hadn’t been doing him any favors, treating him like he could break at any moment. The truth was, Adam was a lot stronger than they thought.
“So, do you like him?”
“What?” She whirled her head back to face him. “No, I don’t.”
Adam raised his chin at her smugly. “Uh-huh.”
She rolled her eyes. “Let’s go home.” Facing back to the wheel, she put the van in gear and pulled out onto the road. As they drew farther away, her swan sighed sadly.
God, was she always going to feel this way, drawn to him, pining for him? Daniel’s words from this morning came back to her thoughts. She just had to make sure they never bonded. But staying away might not be enough.
Later that evening, as she lay in bed not feeling tired at all, she reached for her phone on her bedside. The missed calls from Cam made guilt seep through her, and so she called him back.
“Darcey,” he greeted.
“Cam.” Not even his gorgeous accent made her feel anything. But she pushed on. “Um, I saw your missed calls. Sorry, did you want to check on me after the break-in?”
“Break-in? What break-in?”
He didn’t even know. Or care. “Never mind. Why did you call?”
“Ah, yes.” He cleared his throat. “I was wondering, there’s an event this weekend that Damon wants us all to attend. Fancy charity event. Black tie, that kind of thing. Would you be my date?”
“Oh.” She tried to muster up all the enthusiasm she had. And utterly failed. “Sure.”
“Excellent. I’ll send you the invite in the morning. Goodnight.”
“Goodnight, Cam.” She plopped back on her pillows. This was it. Her third date with Cam. Daniel said that his biological parents had a happy life even though they weren’t mates. Maybe this was the only way she could truly stop yearning for Anders.
Chapter Six
The night shift stretched on and on with nothing to occupy Anders and his tiger except the silence of the evening, broken only by the various sounds of the forest around him and his own thoughts. Thoughts which inevitably led to one thing, or rather, one person.
Darcey Wednesday.
He didn’t expect to see her at the community center. Hell, he didn’t expect to see her at all. Though seeing her hurt that night had his tiger’s protective instincts flaring, he pushed it deep down. He’d already vowed to stay away and forget about her.
Then s
he just walked right in to the one place he never wanted anyone to see him. The community center was the only place he felt safe enough to let anyone close, as much as he could allow it. Growing up, it had been his sanctuary from the stuff going on at home.
If it wasn’t for the community center, and Betty and Mary and Sensei Toyama, his life would have taken a different path. He owed the center a lot, which was why he gave back as much as he could. Every day he was there, he saw himself in those kids, but the only way to reach them was to open himself up, even just a little.
Seeing Darcey there made him feel exposed and raw. Made him feel things he didn’t want to feel. Not to mention, seeing her shifter side … well, that didn’t help at all.
She was beautiful—no, magnificent—and so was her swan. A black swan. He could hardly believe it even when he did see it. What was that they said about black swans? Supposedly, they were used to describe a rare, unpredictable event.
That’s what Darcey was. An unpredictable event in his life.
Only, he already knew what would happen. Could predict it. But he would fight it before he ruined her.
His thoughts continued to spiral. If only she hadn’t come to Blackstone. If only Daniel hadn’t married Sarah during that night of debauchery. The irony wasn’t lost on him, however, because he was the one who forced the bachelor party in Vegas. All because he didn’t want to be alone with his thoughts and memories on his birthday. Pride and keeping his carefully cultivated reputation made it difficult to tell the guys the real reason he wanted to go to Vegas—that he wanted to be surrounded by the people he considered friends, even though they might not feel the same way about him.
Finally, he was at the end of his shift, and he caught a ride with transport back to HQ. As he sat in the back of the truck, he reached into his pocket and removed something that he’d been itching to touch. Opening his palms, he stared down at it. The object he shouldn’t have kept, but couldn’t bear to throw away.
A single black feather.
It wasn’t overly big, maybe four or five inches long, curled at the edges and a pure midnight in color. Lifting it to his nose, he could smell traces of Darcey’s sweet, intoxicating scent.
The truck jolted to a stop, and he tucked the feather away into his front shirt pocket before anyone saw it. Thanking the driver, he hopped out and headed into HQ. After a quick shower and changing into his street clothes, he headed out. He was about to grab the door when it opened, and Damon stepped in.
“Chief,” he greeted.
“Anders,” Damon replied. “Just the man I wanted to see.”
“Me?” he asked. “What’s up, chief?”
Damon motioned for them to step aside, and Anders followed him. “Just wanted to remind you about the Blackstone Rangers Anniversary Ball this weekend.”
Fuck me. “Yeah and so?”
Damon scratched his chin. “It’s come to my attention that you’ve missed every single one of them since you joined.”
He snorted. “Yeah, those things really ain’t my style.”
“This year it will be.”
“Are you fucking kidding me?”
One of Damon’s dark brows shot up, and he rose up to full height, hands on his hips. “Wanna try that again?”
Anders gnashed his teeth together. “All these years, Simpson didn’t care if I went or not,” he said, mentioning the previous chief of the Blackstone rangers before Damon. “Why should you?”
“Because you know attendance is mandatory,” Damon pointed out. “It’s an official function, and the Lennoxes will want every one of us there for support. Our biggest donors will be there.”
His blood froze in his veins. That was exactly why he didn’t want to go. “You don’t need me there. I’ll swap shifts with anyone who wants to attend your fancy party.”
Damon crossed his arms over his chest. “You’re going.”
“No.”
“If Krieger can make it, so can you.”
“What?” John Krieger was coming to a fancy dress party? It almost made him want to go. Almost. “That doesn’t mean shit. So, let him get dressed up like a trained monkey. What’s it to you, anyway?”
“I don’t want to be accused of favoritism; you know I need to treat everyone equally. Look, just come this once, and I won’t get on your case about it for another couple of years.”
“Why are you hell-bent on having me there?” He eyed Damon suspiciously. Of course, the chief’s expression betrayed nothing. “Are you going to drag me out there if I decide not to go?”
“I could. Or I could make things harder for you to get the shifts you want.”
Motherfucker. “Fine,” he relented.
“Great.” Damon took something out of his pocket. “Here’s the invite. Don’t forget to RSVP with your plus-one.”
“Plus—hey, hold on a minute—”
“I’m late to a meeting,” Damon said, brushing him aside. “See you around.”
“You never said anything about a plus-one!” Shit. Shit, shit, shit. But Damon was already gone. Otherwise, he would have told the chief to suck it.
With an angry growl, he stuffed the invitation in his pocket and stalked to his pickup. Getting inside, he lay his forehead on the wheel and let out an annoyed grunt.
Fuck Damon, fuck that anniversary ball, and fuck his life. He supposed it wasn’t all that terrible. And there would probably be hundreds of people at the ball. All of Blackstone’s elite, dressed to the nines. Anxiety edged into his chest, and his heart pounded, but he pushed it aside.
What were the chances he’d run into them? Slim, he told himself. He’d get dressed, parade around in front of Damon, and get the fuck out of there.
Of course, that only solved one problem. He still needed a date.
Shit. He hadn’t been on a date in years. And frankly, it had been a while since he’d even been with any woman. No, his playboy, skirt-chasing act was, well, just that. An act. The last time was … well, he didn’t want to think how long it had been. It wasn’t that he didn’t like sex, but it was too risky and left him feeling too vulnerable.
So, he didn’t even have anyone in his contacts that he could call up to be his date, and he didn’t have a lot of woman friends, except for the ladies at the community center. Maybe he could ask around if any of the female rangers already had dates, but he doubted any of them would go with him considering his reputation.
An idea popped into his head. There was one female he could think of to ask.
Revving up the engine, he started the long drive down the mountain. When he got to the road at the bottom, he turned east instead of west, and made his way to Blackstone town proper, just a few blocks off Main Street, and pulled into a compound that took up most of the block, driving under a sign that proclaimed it as J.D.’s Garage.
After parking his truck next to the small office trailer, he headed toward the workshops, stopping one of the guys to ask where the boss was, who then directed him toward the middle of the three buildings onsite. When he got there, another employee pointed to the yellow Honda sitting in the end, where a figure clad in overalls was bent over the front.
“Hey, J.D.!” he called.
The sound of something hitting metal and a curse came from under the hood. “Shit-licking fuck-trumpets, you guys know never to sneak up on—oh.” J.D. looked out from behind the hood, rubbing her head. As usual, her messy blonde hair was tucked under a trucker cap, and a spot of grease marred her cheek. “It’s you.” Her eyes narrowed at him, and he could swear he felt her animal hiss at him and extend its claws.
“Hey, kitty,” he teased. “What’s shaking?”
Her nostrils flared. Though J.D. had never shifted in front of him, nor had she confirmed what she was, Anders could tell she was definitely feline. “What do you want? I’m up to my ears in work, and I don’t have time to deal with your shit too.”
“I’ll get to the point,” he began. “You’re a girl.”
Rolling her eyes, she pul
led the neckline of her overalls and peered down. “Yep. Tits’re still there, so yeah, I’m a girl all right.”
“There’s this party this weekend at Blackstone Castle. And I need a date.”
“So?”
“So maybe, you and I can go together.”
“I’d rather shit in my hands and clap,” she said, not missing a beat.
“Don’t hold back, now, McNamara. Tell me how you really feel about me.” He blew out a breath. “Why the hell not?”
“Why the hell would I?” she shot back. “A girl can’t even breathe on you without being chalked up as another notch on your bedpost. Besides, I’ve already put on a fancy dress once this year at Damon’s wedding, and that’s about my limit.”
“C’mon, J.D.,” he said. “Do it as a favor? For me?”
“And why would I do that? What do you want me for? Don’t you have a million girls in your phone? Go bother one of them.” She waved him away.
“Do you know anyone else who would want to go with me? How about that friend of yours, the cute redhead who makes dresses?”
“Ha. As if Dutchy would even give you the time of day,” she snorted. “Why are you desperate for a date, anyway?”
“Damon’s making me go,” he moaned. “I don’t have a choice.”
“So? Go alone,” she said. “It’s not like they’re going to stop you from entering if you’re by yourself. If it makes you feel better, tell them I was gonna go, but I got sick.” Picking up a wrench, she waved it at him. “Now, will you please stop bothering me and leave? You won’t find a date here.” She cocked her head toward a group of mechanics at the other end. “Unless you’re thinking of strolling into Blackstone Castle with Big George on your arm. I bet he’ll look cute in a dress and heels.”
He ground his teeth together. “Fine. I’ll say my date cancelled last minute.”
As he left the garage, his hand instinctively went to his pants pocket, stroking the feather he had transferred there from his uniform pocket. There was one person he really wanted to take to this ball; in fact, she was the first one he thought of when Damon said he needed a date.
Blackstone Ranger Rogue: Blackstone Rangers Book 4 Page 8
