by S M Mala
‘How did you-. Yes,’ Murray replied, looking away.
‘Was Eloise raped by her husband on her wedding night and fell pregnant with Hatty?’ The silence was long as he saw his father starting to get upset. ‘And she had a heart defect which meant she shouldn’t have got pregnant at all.’
‘Yes.’
‘Did Hatty try to kill herself when she was ten years old?’ Suddenly Murray looked straight into Jake’s eyes and could see the terror in his father’s face. ‘Don’t answer that.’
‘How can you ask about suicide when your mother took her own life?’ he whispered. ‘I don’t want to think about it.’
‘Are you in love with Delores?’ Jake asked and watched his father smile. ‘Caroline doesn’t like her.’
‘And neither do you.’
‘I don’t buy this caring for Hatty thing one bit. I know there’s something else to it because I heard what was said when you quarrelled. Delores said she did it for you obviously not because she wanted to.’
‘Don’t judge Delores too harshly,’ said Murray, standing up and turning on the engine as he steered the boat down the coast. ‘Her heart is in the right place.’
‘I see the way she looks at Hatty and it’s not love in her eyes,’ said Jake, sinking the rest of his beer before getting another bottle from the ice box.
‘What do you call it?’
‘Mistrust, jealousy, I’m not sure.’
‘You’re quite a smart kid, got your mother’s brains I’ll give you that much,’ laughed Murray, lighting a cigar as he steered.
‘What is it then?’ asked Jake, standing up next to his father as he looked up and noticed the old house on the side before his father stopped the boat.
‘I know where she goes every day, I know what she does,’ he said quietly. ‘There’s not a moment unaccounted for.’
‘Delores? You know when she’s in the room everyone stands to attention,’ laughed Jake. ‘She has the way about her, makes you feel you have to behave. I understand Hatty doing the opposite.’
‘No I mean Hatty,’ his father said, turning off the engine and looking up at the house. ‘When she came to the island, the poor thing was bitten to pieces by mosquito and she’d cry and cry. I covered her in cream and told her it would get better. At that time she wasn’t afraid of the sea and she thought it was the only place where you couldn’t get bitten. Every day we came out on the boat and I’d stop, right here, and she’d look at the house.’
Jake took a moment to look up and through the trees and shrubs. He could see the house behind it. The barriers were around the edge and realised how his father had made it secure so she’d never go that far again.
‘Then she had the accident and everything changed,’ continued Murray. ‘She didn’t speak for nearly a year and was so afraid. You were nine and that’s the only year I ever missed your birthday because she was in such a terrible state. You know, you’re both born on the thirteenth, don’t you?’ Jake nodded as Murray smiled. ‘Hatty thinks that’s her lucky number and no doubt, she likes you more because of it.’ Murray took a deep breath and turned to Jake. ‘I’m sorry if I haven’t been there for you all the time. It’s not because of this island or Hatty, there were other things I had to deal with like your mother’s death and…’ Jake didn’t need to ask who else he was thinking of. ‘I lost two women I loved in the span of two years. Both could’ve been prevented but it was their choices, choices I’ve had to deal with.’
‘Time is a great healer,’ said Jake philosophically.
He looked up at the house and wanted to see Hatty.
‘That’s not true,’ said his father. ‘Time lets you learn how to deal with the pain, but never the ability to truly forget about it.’
As Hatty rode back home early Saturday evening, she was happy she’d nearly finished his frame and exhausted she worked so hard. The heat was hard and stifling, she couldn’t really breathe well and had to get off her bike to catch her breath as well as wipe the sweat off her forehead. Pushing her bike on to the estate, she was relieved to get to a tree and throw her cycle down before taking off her satchel. Then she walked towards her herb garden and checked to see if Barney had managed to get in.
‘Hey Ha Ha Hatty!’ shouted Gina from behind her, walking around the grounds.
Hatty growled to herself. She walked into the herb garden and picked out the weeds and checked on her plants.
‘So a teacher, aye?’ She ignored her knowing the woman who was on the attack. ‘Poor children!’
‘Someone’s got to do it,’ Hatty replied quietly, turning around and sitting on the soil, wondering if Gina had any idea where her lover boy’s lips had been the previous night.
‘Ya not drown from jumpin’ in da pool?’ smirked Gina. ‘Maybe ya should try de sea? Me hear ya like it.’
‘What do you want?’ she said, looking up at the vicious beauty. ‘Because I know you want something so get if off your chest ’
‘Jake Logan,’ she said, smiling and folding her arms. ‘Ya sweet on him, I can tell.’
‘I like Jake.’
She knew she was blushing so glanced away to disguise a little sweat breaking out on her nose.
‘He’s not sweet on your tail Ha Ha Hatty. He was tellin’ his girl, back in New York, how he want to go home an’ he love her.’
‘Why aren’t you upset?’ Hatty said, trying not to look annoyed. ‘You and he are very close.’
‘Let me tell you sumtin,’ Gina said, resting her arms on the fence of the herb garden. ‘Gal like you shouldn’t play wid good people. Ya not a good person.’
‘Simon never thought so!’
‘Don’t ya dare bring me broder name into it!’
‘You just hate me because of Simon.’
‘Ya killed him!’
‘I loved him and he loved me so just-.’
‘Ya background is nastiness, ya were created from nastiness. It show in how ya behave,’ snapped Gina angrily.
‘What do you mean?’ Hatty asked, stunned by the comment as she stood up and peered into her eyes.
‘Ya weren’t made wid love, ya were made wid hate,’ she said seriously. ‘Everyone cover it up but me sick and tired of seeing how ya tink ya better when ya a lot worse.’
‘How was I made with hate?’ Hatty asked, still confused.
‘Ya weren’t wanted an’ now ya older ya should know. Jake know. He askin’ lot of question. He too can see ya for what ya are.’
‘Which is what?’ Hatty gulped, knowing this was bad.
‘Ya nuttin and no-one really care about ya, ya see I’m right. Ya wait. See Jake? ‘e gonna find out how bad ya are.’
Hatty’s eyes welled up and something hit hard in what was said. She watched Gina walk away and she stood there, rooted to the ground.
From the corner of her eye, she saw Monica looking over then walked quickly towards Hatty.
‘Dat bitch!’ said Monica. Hatty roughly wiped her eyes. ‘She never want to see anyone happy dat nasty girl.’
‘How can you be made of hate?’ She saw Monica’s concerned expression. ‘What’ve I done wrong now?’
‘Come to de kitchen,’ said Monica.
Hatty picked up her satchel and left her bike in the middle of the grounds, walking with her head down.
‘She has a way of just tearing me to pieces,’ she said quietly. ‘One easy swoop and she hurts me.’
‘Glory an arse an’ she worry someone like ya more dan dey like she.’
‘Like who?’
‘Master Jacob,’ said Monica quietly.
‘He likes her more but Glory Glory’s on the attack and that’s worrying.’
Jake and Hatty went to ‘Mercy’s’ after dinner for a drink. She noticed he was very happy. Murray seemed to glow as Delores glowered while they were at dinner. She wanted to get Jake on his own to ask questions, but he had other things on his mind.
‘Keep your hands to yourself,’ she said, as they sat at a table, the music in the backgrou
nd.
‘Why did you want to come here?’ he said, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees as he discreetly touched her thigh. ‘We could have gone somewhere else, more discreet.’
Hatty smiled at the very handsome young man sitting opposite her, whose nose was a little red from too much sun but it made him look cute.
‘You go back in less than a week and I want you to have some fun.’
‘I was having a lot of fun last night. I want to do that again,’ he sighed.
‘You know I can’t take it further,’ she said, feeling a little panic in her gut. ‘I know what you’ve been up to and-.’
‘I really want to be up you,’ Jake smiled and rubbed her knee as she realised he was on heat.
‘I’m being cautious.’
‘I’ll be safe. I have precautions.’
‘You’re not listening to me,’ she smiled and sipped her beer, anxious about his train of thought which wasn’t the same as hers. ‘Gina Glory Glory said she heard you talking to your girlfriend, how come?’
‘Ah,’ he said, sitting up. ‘I called her when she was there.’
‘Why would you do that?’
‘I was round Gina’s and I called my girlfriend, simple,’ he shrugged, his face blank of expression.
Hatty’s heart sunk but she knew his experience on everything out weighed hers. she didn’t want to betray how upset she felt knowing she wasn’t the only one, just one of three she knew about.
‘Is she well?’
‘She can’t wait for me to get home,’ he said and she noticed he sighed, looking away.
‘I bet you can’t either,’ she replied, seeing Jake stare at her as she tried to hide the little devastation which was happening in her heart. ‘Have you bought her a present?’
‘Why would I do that?’ he laughed, swigging from his beer and looking at the people dancing on the beach.
‘It’s a nice thing to give presents to people you care about,’ she said, realising he wanted to dance on the sand.
Then Gina popped up to the side as her heart plummeted to the ground, knowing she was in for another verbal assault.
‘Hello Jake,’ she purred, turning to Hatty and flashing a filthy look. ‘Why ya brought she out?’
‘It’s Hatty who brought me,’ he blushed.
She realised he must be embarrassed to be seen with her. Gulping hard, she knew she could so easily cry over something like this but held back.
‘Ya so close to the sea Hatty. Ya not scare?’ teased Gina, smiling brightly.
‘I’m fine,’ Hatty replied and looked away, remembering what the bitch had told her earlier on.
‘Go dance on da beach,’ Gina said.
Hatty noticed Jake was eyeing Gina up and down before guiltily glancing back at her.
‘Take Jake to dance,’ Hatty replied and he frowned, immediately being dragged off.
She watched Gina put his hands on her hips before throwing her arms around his shoulders. Hatty imagined them making love and something stuck hard in her throat knowing she couldn’t look like Gina did, move the way she did and probably please the way only Gina did, so Hatty had heard from others.
The crashing sounds of the sea took Hatty’s attention for a moment and she found herself looking at the old house far up the coast. She remembered the last day she saw Simon and a chill went through her body.
She was tainted, in some way or another.
Darkness was falling quickly and she wondered what ‘created by hate’ meant.
Hatty put her face in her palms before looking at her grubby baby hands and glancing at Gina’s long slender fingers and manicured nails, holding onto his body as Jake laughed with the crowd. She realised he was oblivious to her.
She was just another bit of ‘sport’.
She stood up with the intention of stepping on the beach to stand near him but the sea was loud and it spat its white foam at her, as if telling her to go away.
Hatty turned around and walked back home into the early darkness of the night. Her heart felt heavy as she knew she was scared to give Jake what he wanted but he was finding out things about her she needed to know.
And the worse bit was, she knew she was starting to fall in love with the boy she could never have.
There was turmoil in her gut as she wondered if she gave herself to him if he’d suddenly like her more. Then she realised he’d only cast her aside because he didn’t feel the same. She noticed the light on the small blue house as she walked past and knocked on the door.
‘Who dat?’ Ethel shouted out as Hatty realised she shouldn’t have disturbed the old lady.
‘Sorry Auntie Ethel, I was just passing. I’ll go and-.’
‘Hatty, dat you? What ya doin’ ‘ere so late?’
‘It’s only after nine,’ Hatty replied. ‘I’ll come back after market tomorrow.’
Hatty jumped when Ethel flung open the door, stood in her dressing gown and hair in a net.
‘Where ya been?’
‘Down by Mercy’s place,’ Hatty replied smiling at Ethel. ‘It’s not important.’
‘Dere full of high people! Come in child,’ Ethel said, grabbing her arm and pulling into her home. Hatty always had to bite her bottom lip to stop laughing at all the kitsch things inside her house. It was obvious Ethel had family all round the world and proudly displayed the mats, flags, coasters – you name it Ethel had it. ‘Ya want a drink?’
‘No thanks.’
‘Sit down,’ Ethel said, as she sat back down on the sofa watching television. ‘Ya bored?’
‘I need to talk to you.’
‘This show nonsense!’ she said, shaking her head from side to side
‘Why wasn’t Delores there when I was born?’
‘An’ dem local programme not any better. Me tink Louisa would ‘ave been a big star by now.’
‘What does it mean I was created by hate?’ she gulped, knowing the old lady was ignoring her. ‘I don’t know what it means.’
‘Me switchin’ over.’
‘She told me to jump in the sea.’
Hatty noticed Ethel give her a sideways glance.
‘Ah, Hatty if ya come round talkin’ nonsense then carry ya backside ‘ome,’ Ethel sighed.
‘Jake’s finding out things and-.’
‘Never cross ya mind he askin’ question’ an’ people remeberin’ tings best left forgot?’
‘I just want to know before I die the truth about me, that’s all,’ Hatty replied and closed her eyes. ‘Gina Glory Glory said when Jake finds out he’s not going to like me.’
‘Why ya messin’ wid dat boy? ‘
‘I like him.’
‘‘e like you?’
‘I hope so.’
‘It Mister Murray son,’ Ethel said, her face etched with concern. ‘Ya can ‘ave any boy.’
‘That’s not true. The ones who are worth having are scared I’m mad and the ones who want me want a bit of Murray’s money,’ Hatty gulped.
‘Dem boys scare of Murray Logan and what ‘e do if dey mess wid ya!’
‘I don’t want any other boy. Don’t you think he likes me? I don’t think he does.’
‘Me tink ‘e like ya too much an’ me see problem.’
‘When I see him with Gina Glory Glory I realise how-.’ Hatty held her breath for a moment. ‘He’s playing with me and I’m so grateful for the attention I’m being stupid.’
‘What ya givin’ ‘im to find out tings?’ Ethel said, her eyes narrowing. ‘Me not tink he doin’ if far free.’
‘Kisses,’ sighed Hatty as Ethel smiled, before laughing. ‘I can’t give him anything else and I told him.’
‘What ‘e say?’
‘Doesn’t say anything,’ Hatty sighed. ‘I can’t talk like this to auntie, she’d go mad.’
‘She ‘ave reason to. What if ya an’ Jake quarrel now? ‘ow ya tink Mister Murray feel?’
‘I don’t know.’
‘And ya know da boy sleepin’ wid Gina G
lory Glory?’ Ethel sucked air through her teeth. ‘Tell Master Jake not to find out more and ya can keep ya sweet kisses.’
‘I don’t want to keep my kisses I just want to kiss him.’
‘Ya not share him wid ‘er. Ya better dan dat!’
‘I’m not sharing him. Tonight, I saw him with Glory and I know when he looks at me he doesn’t look at me like he does her. He looks at me like I’m a wounded dog.’ She bit her lip and smiled. ‘And Glory as if she’s a bitch on heat.’
Ethel laughed so hard, Hatty had to slap her back to stop her from swallowing her dentures.
He didn’t know how he felt the next morning other than having a massive hangover. Then he remembered he was mad with Hatty as she disappeared and he’d other plans. Like a rocket shooting into his head, he groaned into his pillow, knowing he got so drunk he slept with Gina after promising himself he wouldn’t.
Jake sat up, his head throbbing.
He went to the bathroom and threw up.
As he approached the kitchen mid-morning, he could hear the radio and a high pitched wail which he realised was Ethel singing. The house was empty as he walked into the kitchen to see them preparing lunch.
‘Ya up?’ Ethel laughed, flicking him a glance as Monica smiled sweetly.
‘Master Jake, ya like coffee?’ asked Monica, gesturing him to sit down as he fell into the chair, putting his head in his hands. ‘Ya ‘ad fun last night?’
‘I think so,’ he said, sitting back in the chair. ‘Too much rum.’
‘Too much woman,’ barked Ethel as she started counting chicken quarters. ‘Ya playin’ wid dese gals. Ya not tink what ‘appen when ya go. Ya know Gina Glory Glory will torment Hatty.’
‘She left me last night to fend for myself,’ he scowled. ‘As if she cares.’
‘She come to see me. She say ya dance on da beach an’ ya tink she gonna follow when ya know she scare of da sea?’ Ethel sucked air through her teeth and, to Jake, it sounded like a loud screech. ‘Me tell ya to leave dat gal alone and ya pester Hatty.’
‘It’s not all one sided,’ he said defensively, as Monica grimaced. ‘She’s encouraging me.’
