Elizabeth was quite happy to sit on that sofa, although she felt rather too close to Mr. Darcy when he took his seat. She felt rather breathless at his proximity, though she tried not to show it.
“Miss Bennet.” There was a pause, and he tried again. “Miss Bennet. I was rather disconcerted at the subterfuge of bringing you here and I really want to be clear and prevent any misunderstandings.”
She looked up at him. He was really rather handsome, if you liked the aristocratic look, and his expression was less tight and more unguarded. But she could not imagine what he was talking about.
The silence drew out, and she could not stay quiet. “So, what do you want to tell me, Mr. Darcy? I admit I am curious now.”
He smiled tightly, looking rather unsure of himself. “As I was saying downstairs, I understand that you are in need of some security, and that you also have significant family responsibilities. You wish to be able to support your mother and sisters in a suitable manner and this is made even more difficult by the present general financial situation.”
“You understand correctly, Mr. Darcy,” Elizabeth said quietly. “But I want you to understand, I will not take any position out of pity for me.” There goes my chance of this situation.
“I am sorry, Miss Bennet, I have not made myself completely clear. As I said, there was some subterfuge bringing you here. The assistance is not in the form of a position with my sister.”
A jolt of shock. “Do my aunt and uncle know that?”
“I believe so,” he said gravely. “Please do not be angry with them. It was the wish of my uncle.” He grimaced. “I think I am not doing this very well.”
She smiled, but she knew that smile did not reach her eyes. “Perhaps it will be better if you speak plainly, Mr. Darcy. I promise I will not get up and walk away, so you will have a chance to explain it afterwards, when I understand the facts.”
He bowed his head in acquiescence. Then he took a very deep breath. “Very well. Miss Bennet, I find myself in a situation where I must marry, and marry very soon. I do not know any lady whom I would consider making my wife — or I did not, until my uncle said he had found someone who was eminently suitable and that I should come at once to London.” He smiled.
“He was very complimentary of you, but I insisted that I should meet you first.” He raised her hand to his lips. “I agree fully with his great regard of you, and I have wealth enough to allow you and your family to be secure for the rest of your lives.” He took a deep breath. “Miss Bennet, will you do me the honour of agreeing to become my wife? I know that we have not had the chance to become acquainted, to develop affection for each other, and I hope we can form this affection over the coming weeks and months.”
All the breath seemed to leave Elizabeth with a rush. Whatever she had expected, it had not been this; and her mind went back and she remembered Aunt Gardiner sitting in the park with her while the children played, telling her that she should not refuse to consider marrying. Was that because of this?
Mr. Darcy was looking at her hopefully, and she forced herself to slow her breathing and calm down a little.
“I thank you for making clear to me what the situation is, Mr. Darcy. As you can imagine, I have several questions before I can answer you plainly, and I hope we can both be frank with each other.”
He nodded gravely, and she thought for a moment.
“First, I would like to understand why you find yourself in this position, sir. It seems that you can afford to do as you wish, nobody should be able to force you to do this.”
He looked pained. “I suppose you need to know, but it is difficult to remember.” His gaze turned inwards, and he smiled slightly.
“I have a great friend from university. He is younger than me and went to Cambridge later. But I had returned there to do some research, and we became friends. My family disapprove, for his fortune comes from trade. But I don’t care about that. When he rented an estate to settle in the country, I went to stay with him.” He wiped his brow.
“I was a little uneasy, because he has two sisters; one of them is unmarried and has considerable designs on me. I was being very careful to ensure that she could never put me in a compromising position, to such an extent that I was planning to leave early and return to London — when she made an entirely false statement that I had caused her ruin.” He turned to her, earnestly.
“Miss Bennet, I will assure you with all the power that I have, that her allegation is entirely false. Her brother believes me and told her that if she makes the allegation public, it is she who will be ruined, for I will never marry her.” He rubbed his face again. “I will take you to my friend if you wish, so that you may hear assurances about her character from someone other than me.”
“If she believed you would not marry her, then it is in her interests to stay silent,” Elizabeth observed, feeling quite sympathetic towards him. “I see no reason to force yourself to marry in haste.”
“I thought the same, Miss Bennet,” he nodded. “But I have Georgiana to consider. Not for anything would I wish to leave the slightest chance that she might suffer damage to her name because of me.”
Elizabeth was silent. This man had accepted the duty to his sister above his own wishes in the same way she knew her duty was to her family.
She looked up. “What do you know of my family, sir? I would not have you discover what they are after the marriage, when you might resent me.”
His expression softened slightly. “It is very thoughtful of you, Miss Bennet. I know your father was a gentleman, whose estate was unfortunately entailed away, leaving your mother and you and your sisters in difficult straits.”
“Indeed, sir.” She looked at him. “I will be blunt. My younger sisters are very foolish. One in particular, has ruined us all. Her child is due to be born soon, but my mother has forgiven her and still spoils her quite outrageously.”
He looked grave. “I am grateful to you for your honesty, Miss Bennet, but I have already been informed of those circumstances.”
She was shocked, certain that it would have prevented an offer.
He smiled a little. “Your uncle told me. He said before the plans went too far, I needed to know.”
“And you don’t mind?” Elizabeth couldn’t believe her ears.
‘It is not so much that,” he murmured. “While I would, of course, support all your family, I would not be able to receive her here or at Pemberley until or unless she had married.”
“Pemberley?”
He smiled. “It is the name of my estate in Derbyshire. I spend a great deal of time there, as much as I can. Your uncle tells me you love being outdoors.”
She knew her eyes shone. “I do indeed. You must tell me about it one day.”
His face relaxed. “If you will do me the honour of agreeing to my offer, you will see it very soon.”
Her heart beat louder. It seemed to be time to make a decision.
“I will need a few moments to think, Mr. Darcy. I … cannot give you an answer at this moment.”
He stood up and bowed slightly. “I understand. But I do want to emphasise how you would have my help always to assist you to support your mother and sisters — and your aunt and uncle, too. I can see how fond you are of them.”
Oh! How can I leave them in their current dire straits? Elizabeth was tempted. She smiled mechanically. “Just a few moments, Mr. Darcy.”
“Of course.” He looked disappointed, but bowed and left her alone.
13
Darcy reluctantly crossed the hall towards the drawing room. He didn’t want to go in there and admit that Miss Bennet had not accepted his offer immediately.
He stopped outside the door. Why had she not agreed at once? Might she refuse? If so, what would he do? He tried to think what might help her make the decision he wished her to, and recalled his family all saying that he must be kind to her and not so distant.
Perhaps she would like to talk to her aunt, gain her advice? That might help he
r, and he opened the door and went in, seeing all their faces turning hopefully toward him, and looking disappointed as they realised he was alone.
He crossed the room to the card table. “Mrs. Gardiner, Miss Bennet has asked for a few moments to think. I wondered if she might appreciate the chance to speak to you quietly while she considers her answer?”
“Oh, of course!” She looked a little flustered, and then at those around the table. “Would you excuse me?”
Darcy beckoned a footman. “Please show Mrs. Gardiner to her niece in the gallery and then leave them alone.”
He turned, and Richard was beside him. “Come to the library and have a whisky, Darcy. You look as if you need it.”
Darcy followed him willingly, giving a small smile to Georgiana, who was looking anxious. He couldn’t reassure her just yet. Perhaps Aunt Alice would keep her close.
He dropped into the leather chair, while Richard spoke to the footman outside the door, then entered and closed it.
“He will tell us as soon as Mrs. Gardiner comes back downstairs.” Richard crossed the room and poured whisky into two tumblers.
He handed one to Darcy and dropped into the chair opposite. “Well, what was it like?”
Darcy groaned. “I thought it was all right until she said she needed a few moments to think. Now — I don’t know.”
“So what do you think of her? Will you be happy marrying her?”
“She might yet refuse,” he shrugged, not willing to admit that his heart had fallen at the thought.
“And will that disappoint you?” Richard persisted.
He frowned, he would have to admit it now. “Yes, I think it will,” Darcy said slowly. “We have put so much into the plan, I cannot imagine what I will do if she refuses.”
“Darcy! That is not what I meant and you know it!” Richard sounded irate. “Do you think you can have a satisfying, happy marriage with her?”
Darcy looked levelly at him. “She seems to be as your father has said, a pleasant, dutiful young lady who gained Georgiana’s confidence very quickly. Whether affection can come from it, I do not yet know, although I hope so.”
“Well, I don’t suppose I can ask for more than that from you.” Richard stared at his glass thoughtfully.
At that moment there was a knock on the door, and the footman entered. “Mrs. Gardiner is coming downstairs, sir.”
Darcy jumped to his feet and hurried to the hall. He bowed at her, looking to see if Miss Bennet was with her.
“Mr. Darcy,” Mrs. Gardiner looked anxious. “Lizzy has asked if you would be willing to return to the gallery.”
He dipped his head in agreement. “Thank you.” He hurried up the stairs, wondering. He hadn’t been able to tell from her expression what the answer was going to be. Surely she could not refuse him? Surely?
He stopped at the entrance to the gallery. She was walking slowly along, gazing at the portraits on the wall. Why was she doing that?
Darcy cleared his throat, and bowed as she turned towards him. Then he was moving toward her. He stopped a few feet from her, unsure.
She smiled. “It’s not a situation where either of us knows what we should do, Mr. Darcy. But I do not want to keep you waiting. Thank you for allowing me a few minutes — and for sending my aunt to speak to me.” She took a deep breath.
“If you are sure that this is the right thing for you to do, and that my family is not an impediment to your offer, then I will thank you for the honour, and agree to it.”
Darcy felt a sudden warmth spreading through him, and a relaxation of the tight anxiety that had plagued him since Netherfield.
He lifted her hand to his lips. “Thank you, Miss Bennet — Elizabeth.” He indicated the sofa. “Let us sit down for a moment.”
She nodded quietly and did as he asked, but he felt some disquiet. She looked — sad.
“Are you well, Miss Ben — Elizabeth?” He tried to imagine what she was thinking. Surely most young ladies wished to marry someone of wealth and importance. Elizabeth Bennet could not have hoped to marry so well in the ordinary run of things, being the daughter of a relatively poor gentleman. She had nothing to be unhappy about.
“I am well, Mr. Darcy. To be frank with you, this whole matter has been a surprise to me, and is not how I imagined my engagement might be conducted.” She looked pensive. “I hope you will allow me a little time to get over the disappointment.”
Disappointment? Darcy swallowed his own dismay. He’d never imagined anyone being disappointed if he made them an offer.
“Of course, madam. Perhaps you’d wish to return home to rest. I will call tomorrow.”
“I think that will be best, sir.” She stood up, unsmiling, and he accompanied her downstairs. But she would have to endure the congratulations of the rest of the party, he knew that, and he stopped in the hall.
“I will try and assist you to get away quite soon, but first, we will need to make the announcement to my family.” He smiled down at her, hoping she would be able to appear more cheerful.
“Of course,” she murmured and he offered her his arm. He felt her stiffen as they entered the room, and he tried to hide his own irritation. He did not want his uncle thinking he’d forced this, made her unhappy.
“Uncle Henry, may I introduce the future Mrs. Darcy?”
There were happy cries from the ladies, and everyone gathered round. Darcy was pleased to see that Elizabeth was smiling and appeared very content with the situation.
After a moment she slipped her hand from his arm and turned to Georgiana.
“I hope you are pleased at the thought of a new sister,” he heard her say, and then Richard was beside him.
“Don’t worry about her, Darcy. I can see you are strained by it all. Let them go home and you can relax and we’ll now make the rest of the plans. Things will settle down gradually.”
“She seemed very sad, and I don’t know why.” Darcy’s eyes followed her figure. “But she seems cheerful enough now.”
“Don’t believe it,” Richard murmured. “She is putting on an act. You must be very gentle.”
Darcy turned to him in irritation. “When they have gone, you will tell me precisely why she is unhappy at the thought of marrying me.”
Richard’s eyes flashed. “Oh, I certainly will.”
14
Elizabeth was glad that her uncle and aunt didn’t speak on the way back to Cheapside. The journey took nearly half-an-hour, because of the need for the runners to light the way.
She leaned back and shut her eyes. In the space of a few hours, her life had changed for ever. How had it come to this? She remembered days long past when she and Jane had lain in the meadow, staring at the passing clouds, describing their dream gentlemen. The main things they all had in common, of course, was they they were handsome, wealthy, and madly in love with them.
Elizabeth tried not to smile. Mr. Darcy was obviously wealthy, and certainly handsome. He was not, of course, madly in love with her. How could he be? They had only just met.
She tried to remember every moment in his company. He was very gentlemanly, his manners impeccable. She must hope that behind the closed doors of their home he would remain so, and she shivered.
A touch on her knee startled her and her eyes flew open. “Don’t think about it too much, Lizzy.” Her aunt’s voice was soft. “Just let yourself get used to the idea gradually.” She smiled anxiously.
Elizabeth smiled mechanically. “Yes, Aunt Gardiner.” She closed her eyes again and tried not to think about him. There would be time when she was in her bedchamber tonight. She suppressed another shiver.
How much longer before her bedchamber was no longer her sanctuary but open to her husband — a stranger — whenever he should wish it? She took some deep breaths.
This had all been carefully planned. Aunt Gardiner probably even knew the date of the marriage. Elizabeth clenched her jaw. She would not ask. Not tonight. Perhaps she could write to Jane. Jane might have enough coppers to p
ay for the letter.
As soon as they were safely indoors, Elizabeth kissed her aunt and uncle goodnight and made her way up to her bedchamber. She hastily tugged a shawl from the closet, and sat in the chair by the window.
The night was still, and almost dark. Elizabeth could see only a single candle burning in the house opposite. She wondered idly what was the reason that person couldn’t sleep, either.
A quiet knock on the door, and Aunt Gardiner was there. “Come on, Lizzy. Let’s get you into bed. You will sleep, I promise, once you are settled.” She was already in her night shift and robe, her hair in curls over her shoulders.
Elizabeth allowed her to help her into her own shift, and brush out her hair. “Have I made the right choice, Aunt?” she couldn’t stop herself asking.
The older woman smiled anxiously. “You didn’t have very long, I know that. But you’re a sensible girl, and we talked about the advantages and disadvantages, didn’t we?” She kissed Elizabeth’s head.
“Remember, you wouldn’t have chosen the life of a governess, either. But it was thrust upon you, and you poured your heart into it. Now you must pour your heart into this new life. I think Mr. Darcy is a true gentleman, and your liveliness and spirit will soon win him over.”
It was a sensible way to look at the situation, but Elizabeth was not inclined to feel sensible. She managed to wait until her aunt had left the room and then she burst into tears. Perhaps she could say she’d changed her mind. But then she would be letting down her family, her aunt and uncle, even Georgiana, who’d showed her delight that Elizabeth had agreed to marry Mr. Darcy.
And Jane. If Elizabeth married, Jane could come and stay. She’d be away from Lydia’s ruin, living amongst the wealthy. Jane could meet a wonderful gentleman and marry well. How could Elizabeth deny her that chance?
Elizabeth made a face at her drawn and tired look in the glass the next morning. But there was not a lot she could do about it, and she did the best she could with the bowl of warm water she’d fetched from the kitchen.
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