by Hannah Gray
I hate more than anything that he lost someone he loved. I’d give anything to bring her back and change that night. But I know that we still would have found each other. I just wish we could have found each other without him losing someone else.
Pulling me into his arms, he kisses the top of my head. He smells so damn good, and all I want to do is breathe him in.
Suddenly, the song “Better Together” by Luke Combs begins playing throughout the airport.
I look at Lane and find a playful smile on his lips. Why is he looking at me like that?
Tipping his head down, he says against my head, “Can I have this dance?”
“Wait, did you set it up so that this song would play?” I ask, still puzzled.
“I did. Let’s just say, it pays to be in the NFL, and I have connections.” He winks.
He remembered my favorite artist. The funny thing is, this song has played numerous times lately, and it always makes me think of Lane and me.
“I thought you hated country music,” I tease.
“I’m still not a fan of most of it. But this guy’s stuff is all right.” He holds me a little tighter. “I started listening to country during our time apart. Like you with your dad, listening to it somehow made me feel closer to you. I’d sometimes wonder if we were listening to the exact same song at the exact same time. This song came on, and”—he pauses—“I just kept picturing you in a wedding dress. Swaying on the dance floor against me. Surrounded by all of our friends and family.”
I can’t answer. If I did, it would turn into ugly sobbing. Instead, I stand on my tippy-toes and press a kiss to his lips.
The song ends, and we finally step back from each other, though our fingers are still locked.
“I love you. I don’t want to stop your dreams, and if your dream is in South Carolina, I understand. But I have to tell you, Florida would be better if you were in it.”
Tilting my head to the side, I look into his blue eyes. Eyes that usually look stormy, yet today, they are clear. “Are you asking me to move to Florida with you?”
“I already live in Florida. I bought a house but haven’t decorated a single thing. I was saving that for when I got you back.”
South Carolina isn’t really where I want to be. But I applied to positions at different high schools all around the country. I just needed to get away from Massachusetts and try something new.
“How far is the beach?”
“About two steps. Possibly three.”
My eyes widen. “Seriously?”
“Yep,” he says. “So, what do you say?”
Looking around, I see we have quite an audience. Even some people with their phones out. I guess Lane being in the NFL would make this a big deal. Chewing my bottom lip, I try to think of a valid reason I shouldn’t go. But I come up short. I know I could find a teaching job somewhere nearby, and yeah, I suppose I wouldn’t be close to my family, but I wouldn’t in South Carolina either. Besides, my mom and John bought a house in Florida, and it isn’t too far from Tampa.
I smile. “Okay.”
His face grows serious. “Yeah?”
“Yes.”
When his dimple pops out, I can’t take it any longer. I’m just about to leap into his arms when he scoops me up in his, twirling us around.
Once he sets me down, the pieces to the puzzle begin to connect.
“How did you know I would be here?”
“Just knew, I suppose.”
My eyes narrow. “You did not. Who told you, you sneaky man?”
“Fine. Trent.” He laughs. “I guess he doesn’t hate the thought of us together after all.”
“And my ID?” I poke his chest. “That was you, too, wasn’t it?”
Ignoring me, he grabs my luggage. Taking me by the hand, he leads me up toward the exit. “I’ll say this. I owe your best friend, Ava, a lot of favors from here on out.”
“Ava? That traitor.” I laugh. “I knew I hadn’t misplaced my ID! You jerk. I thought I’d lost my mind.”
“Hey”—he shrugs—“love makes you do crazy things.”
That it does, babe. That it does.
fifty-six
Lane
February
Walking into the graveyard, I follow the path of crushed stone. It’s winter now, and it’s fucking freezing today.
I wish I were back in Florida.
Memphis and I flew into New York a few days ago to meet Mason’s new baby girl. It’s crazy to think that Mason is now not only a dad, but also someone’s husband.
What a scary fucking thought.
After flying to New York to meet the baby, we rented a car and drove to Massachusetts to spend a few days. Memphis wanted to see Ava before we flew home, so I figured this would be a good chance to visit the man who had helped shape Memphis into the strong, smart, funny, sarcastic, and oftentimes stubborn woman she is today.
Stopping at the large stone, I kneel down, setting down a Budweiser and a bag of M&M’s. According to Memphis, they were her dad’s favorite. I figured I’d better butter him up if I wanted him to like me and bring his daughter and me good luck in moving forward.
“Hey, Mr. Montgomery.” I gaze around, making sure no one is listening. “I bet you’re thinking, What is this asshole doing here without my daughter? Not that I would blame you. I’d rather see her than me if I were you.
“Your daughter is very special to me, sir.” Pausing, I close my eyes and picture Memphis’s sweet face, and it instantly calms me.
I understand that her father isn’t actually here, but I’m still nervous as hell because I know that he can hear me. I’m sure of it.
Stuffing my hands into my pockets, I push forward. “I’ve loved her since way before I even allowed myself to understand it.” I smile and shake my head. “Well, I fought it for a while too … but that was because I wasn’t ready to give myself to someone as special as she is. I was afraid if I did, the universe would take her away. I thought it would be better to keep her at a distance.” I laugh. “It turns out, your daughter doesn’t take no for an answer very well.”
Every breath I take is a cloud of white smoke. I decide to be honest with the man who, as far as Memphis is concerned, hung the moon. “She led me out of the darkness when I didn’t think there was any way to escape it. In fact, I was so close to letting it swallow me whole. Tired of feeling the pain.” Looking down, I study the beautiful design of the fish on the stone. Memphis told me he loved fishing.
“She came along, reminding me of how beautiful this life can be.” Glancing up at the sky and then back at the stone in front of me, I can’t help but wonder if he’d approve of me. I hope so. “I wish I could formerly ask you for her hand in marriage. But I know that’s not an option. So, instead, I wanted to make you a promise. I promise you that I will love her with everything that I am for the rest of my life. I will protect her fiercely, the way I know you would if you were still here. And I promise you, sir, there will never be a single day that she doesn’t feel loved.”
My eyebrows pull together as a rush of feelings come over me. I wish so much he could have had a miracle like my father did. I’d want that for Memphis more than anything.
“Thank you, Mr. Montgomery. For helping to create such an incredible woman as your daughter. You did good.” Patting the stone, I stand up.
I start to turn around when a red cardinal comes from nowhere and lands on her father’s stone. Completely unfazed that I’m only a foot away from it.
I stare at it for a moment, and Memphis’s words from a few months ago come back to me.
“Look at it!” she yells from the kitchen window.
Coming into the room after showering, I glance around.. “Look at what?”
“The red cardinal on our porch.” She watches it, smiling. “It’s my dad’s birthday today.” She wipes a tear from her eye. “I knew he would send me a sign.”
Coming behind her, I wrap my arms around her. “That’s amazing, baby.”
; “It’s been said that red cardinals are messengers from our loved ones that we miss.” She leans her head into my shoulder and sighs. “I always seem to see them on certain occasions. Or times when I miss him most.”
The cardinal watches me for a few moments before graciously flying away. I know without a shadow of a doubt that I got the blessing I needed to marry Memphis. I don’t know exactly when I’m going to propose or when we will marry. I just know that we will.
Maybe some people come into our lives but aren’t meant to stay. I think my soul was awaiting Memphis to come and take away the pain. To bring me back to myself. And that’s exactly what she did. I’ll spend the rest of my life showing her how thankful I am. And I’ll be a damn happy man while doing it.
One Year Later
“Dude, you look like you’re going to piss yourself.” Trent laughs. “Do you need me to drive the getaway car?” He glances down at my shoes. “You didn’t even wear sneakers. Haven’t you ever seen Runaway Bride?”
“No, I haven’t. Because I’m a fucking guy,” I say.
I’m pretty taken aback that Trent Kade has seen that movie. He walks around, trying to come off as the biggest hard-ass, and the guy’s talking about a Julia Roberts movie, for fuck’s sake.
“Some best man he is.” Mason pouts. “I wouldn’t have tried to convince you to run away from Memphis if I were the best man. But that’s right; you chose this grumpy asshole who doesn’t even believe in love.”
Trent frowns. He believes in love. But the one he loves hasn’t returned to him yet. Since Cameran—the girl he fell for hard back at NEU—he has not so much as hugged another female. Well, unless it’s Anna, Mason’s wife, and if Memphis forces him to hug her good-bye. Oh, and Haven, Mason and Anna’s daughter. He loves her. We all do.
“When are you going to stop crying like a little bitch because he didn’t pick you?” Trent teases him.
Flicking him off, Mason looks at me and shakes his head. “I was going to name my next child after you. But now, I see how it is.”
“Oh my flying fuck. No, you weren’t,” Trent throws back.
Mason shrugs. “Guess we will never know, will we?”
Mason has all but cried over not being best man since I broke the news that I had chosen Trent. That was ten months ago. Ten months is a long-ass time to listen to a guy like Mason King sulk. To be honest, it was one of the hardest decisions I ever had to make. But at the end of the day, Trent and Memphis are stepsiblings now. They never had any other siblings, so it means a lot to them. They have a bond that I never would have expected.
“Can you both shut the hell up? I’m about to get married.”
Suddenly, a flash of red hair comes rushing in.
Anna, Mason’s wife, grabs hold of me. Straightening my tie, she nods. “Yes, you are. You are one lucky bastard too. Wait until you see your soon-to-be wife. She’s looking hot.”
“Glad you’re here,” Trent calls across the room to her. “Maybe bitch boy”—he jerks his thumb toward Mason—“will stop crying.”
Anna narrows her eyes at Trent. “I love you, Trent. But if you call my husband bitch boy again, I promise you, I will knee you right in the nuts.”
Trent’s eyes widen slightly. He visibly swallows. “Sorry, Red.”
Trent’s a big guy. And a bit of an ass at times. But all of us, including him, are frightened of Anna. They don’t call her Red just because of her hair.
She walks over to Mason, and he grins at her. “Thanks, babe. I knew you’d under—”
Cutting him off, she holds her hand up and tilts her head. “Mase, are you really still whining about not being best man?”
He looks surprised and then embarrassed. He shakes his head. “No, I’m not.” He pouts like a five-year-old.
Anna gives him a pointed look. “Mase …”
“Fine. It’s just … it’s not fair!”
Leaning in, she gives him a kiss on the cheek. “I love you. But we need to get these two lovebirds married. So, if you could stop being a whiny ass now,” she says, dropping her voice lower, but we can all still hear her, “I’ll give you a treat when we get home.”
He thinks about it for a moment before finally muttering, “Fine. But it’d better be a good treat.”
My dad pokes his head in. “Five minutes, boys.”
Coming over to me, he pats my shoulder. “How are you doing?”
“I’m good,” I lie.
My dad being the way he is, he can read right through my bullshit. “The day I married your mom, I was so nervous that I actually fainted before the ceremony.”
That gets my attention. “What? For real?”
I just always assumed my dad had been cool, calm, and collected on his wedding day. Just like he is every single day of his life.
He nods. “Yep. I kept thinking I would get out to that altar, and when the music started, she’d never come out.”
“But she did,” I whisper.
He chuckles. “I’ll never know why she did. But she did. And I thank God for it every day.” He slaps me on the back. “Memphis fits perfectly with our family. You chose a good one, son.”
I smile and nod. I’m so thankful that my dad even gets to be here. Less than two years ago, we didn’t think he had long to live. Thank fuck that doctor was wrong and he gets to be here today. The disease he has, it hasn’t been easy to deal with. He has good days and bad days. Right now, thankfully, it’s a good day. All that matters to us is that he is alive, and for the most part, his quality of life is really good.
“She does fit in perfectly, doesn’t she?” I smile.
I’m not nervous because I think I’m making a mistake. I’m nervous because I love her so much, and I’m constantly scared shitless that I’m going to lose her. When she drives on the interstate without me, I stare at the clock until she safely makes it to her destination. When she gets the flu or has a fever, I panic and think she has some fatal illness. I’m always scared that something will swoop in and take her from me. And honestly, I don’t think I could survive that.
Blowing out a breath, I look at myself in the mirror. Today, Memphis Montgomery will become Memphis Rivers. And I cannot wait.
Heading outside, we make our way to the archway.
“It’s so fucking cold out. Who has a wedding outside in New England in the month of February?” Trent groans.
Mason leans around Trent and shrugs. “If I were your best man, I wouldn’t have complained about a little cold weather.”
“Give it up, dickhead. You aren’t the best man,” Trent mumbles back.
It might sound like they are fighting, but it’s all in good humor. Well, it is on Trent’s part. Mason will probably cry about not being best man for years to come.
“This is the first place we came together. It means something,” I explain, keeping my eyes fixed on the spot I know Memphis will be coming from. Waiting for my girl.
Trent leans closer. “Oh, you mean, when you were sneaking around behind my back.”
“Yep, exactly.” I nod.
I don’t even try to defend myself on that topic anymore. It basically comes up at every family holiday.
I could say, Hey, Trent, pass the turkey.
And he’d glare at me and say, I bet you and Memphis went to a restaurant and ordered turkey when you were sneaking around.
I swear, it’s that bad.
The music starts, and I see Anna making her way down the aisle. She and Memphis became close shortly after Memphis and I made it official. When I turn toward Mason, I see he has the look in his eyes that I’m sure I’m going to have when Memphis comes down that aisle.
Memphis
Anna and Ava have already made their way down the aisle. Now, it’s my three flower girls’ turns. Our nieces, Ella and Emma. And Mason and Anna’s daughter, Haven, who only just started walking a month prior and is very unsteady on her tiny feet. It’s absolutely adorable as she holds on to Ella’s hand to steady herself down the aisle. The three of them
are the cutest things. They are in white dresses, accompanied by green hooded cloaks that match the bridesmaid dresses and thick tights to keep their little legs warm. It’s cold outside. But the ice castles mean something to Lane and me. I think it’s when we both saw a whole other side to each other and lust turned to love. So, naturally, we had to have our wedding here.
The music switches, and the song “A Thousand Years” by Christina Perri begins to play.
“You ready?” My mom smiles and squeezes my hand.
I nod. “I am.” And I am ready. I am so ready.
I chose my mom to walk me down the aisle. For such a long time, it was just her and me. And even though she’s now married to John and I know he would have loved to give me away, she felt like the right choice.
I round the corner, and immediately, my eyes find Lane. My breath hitches, and my heartbeat must go through the roof.
My God, I love that man.
Lane immediately has to wipe his eyes. The thing about Lane is, he’s the broodiest, strongest, toughest man I know. But when it comes to me, he can be a bit of a baby.
Once we reach Lane and my mom gives me away, I turn to him to find his eyes looking right into mine. Just as they always do.
After a prayer and some words from the pastor, it’s time to exchange our vows. I don’t know how I’m going to make it through my own. Let alone listen to Lane say his.
Taking a deep breath, I try to quiet my shaking nerves. Talking in front of groups has never been my forte.
“Lane …” My voice squeaks, and I tremble slightly as I quickly feel the stare of every single eyeball here.
Lane gives my hand a squeeze. Letting me know it’s okay, that he’s here. And just like that, the nerves slowly melt away. I’m reminded that all that matters is him and me. And in this moment, it’s really only us.
