It occurred to Kerry that Beth was around the same age as Aggie, though her personality was the complete opposite. She wore her heart on her sleeve, she was quiet and observant, she shrivelled up her nose whenever Preston lit a cigarette and she wore a cropped vest and a pretty floral skirt that Aggie would’ve hated. Kerry liked Beth’s pretty skirt, her dreadlocked hair and her blue glasses.
Beth had waited two days in the bunker, alternately glued to her phone or her baby. She constantly attempted to call people without luck. She’d go to the bathroom to cry and hope no one noticed her bloodshot eyes. Kerry noticed. Kerry noticed everything.
After a meagre lunch of dry cheese and cheddar crackers and a shared bowl of Quavers, Preston and Larry had decided to nap, and they lay entwined on the mattress, snoring (Preston softly, Larry loudly). Sabrina smoked Preston’s cigarettes – something he would later bruise her for – and watched a boring film on the telly. That left Kerry and Beth to entertain Gabriel, who was having difficulty breathing through his nose.
‘Uh,’ he said sadly.
‘Is he getting better?’ Kerry asked, offering the baby her finger, which he squeezed gratefully.
‘I hope so,’ Beth sighed, ‘though I’m going to have to get him some medicine today.’
‘I wouldn’t wake Preston from a nap,’ Kerry advised wisely. ‘He has amnesia and he’ll get violent if you try to rouse him.’
‘Insomnia,’ Beth corrected.
Kerry could tell that Beth didn’t really want to talk to her. But some illogical part of her hoped that if she could befriend this girl then she wouldn’t take the baby away. The baby liked Kerry and apparently people who liked Kerry were in short supply at the moment.
‘Your family will call you soon,’ she said, noticing Beth glancing at her phone for the millionth time. She didn’t know if this was true but it felt like the right thing to say.
‘Maybe,’ Beth murmured. She attempted a smile. ‘Where are yours?’
‘Uh, my parents got diverse-’ Kerry began.
‘Divorced,’ Beth corrected.
‘-Divorced, yes, sorry,’ said Kerry. ‘So Daddy lives in Canterbury with the Harlot – that’s what Aggie calls her – and Mummy lives in London, a few minutes from David’s house. David is – was – my brother.’
‘And where did you live?’
‘Everywhere,’ said Kerry with a shrug. ‘David’s flat was my favourite, though. Preston moved in not long ago with six cats – that’s one of them over there – so there was always a fluffy little creature to cuddle. And they’re always smiling and joking with each other, and although most of the time they ignore me I feel so peaceful because their home is so full of love. They never say the word, though, that’s just how I see them.’
Beth smiled, a real one this time, and Gabriel dragged Kerry’s finger into his mouth. ‘That sounds nice,’ she said, ‘I mean apart from the being ignored part.’
‘Aggie hangs around there sometimes too,’ Kerry added, ‘just to hide from Mummy. She always said there was something funny about Preston and that she didn’t trust him, but I think she just fancied him and felt rejected cos he’s gay. She was never immune to their love and happiness though, I always see her smiling when they brush shoulders or kiss.’
‘I’m sorry about your brother,’ whispered Beth. ‘I hope Aggie comes back to you.’
‘She won’t,’ Kerry huffed. ‘She always preferred her boyfriend to the rest of us. Though the night after she left I had a horrible dream I couldn’t stop thinking about. I dreamed that Preston killed her.’
‘That’s very, uh, extreme.’
‘He does extreme things sometimes.’
‘Yes, he does seem the type.’
Burbling, Gabriel leaned towards Kerry and reached out his chubby arms. Kerry smiled and tilted her head and Beth looked between them.
‘He wants to sit on your lap,’ Beth translated helpfully.
‘Heh,’ Gabriel agreed.
‘Oh,’ said Kerry, overjoyed.
She stayed very still as Beth transferred the child from her own lap to Kerry’s, and she beamed wide as his body relaxed into hers. Beth stroked the cat with her now-free hands, a warm expression on her face.
‘He likes you.’
‘I like him too,’ replied Kerry. ‘I’ve never held a baby before.’
‘Well, you’re doing fine.’
The baby smelled of talcum powder and baby shampoo despite the fact that he hadn’t had a bath for a couple of days. His hair was soft and curly and his legs were strong and fidgety. He wriggled in her lap, hyper and excited. Kerry felt overwhelmed with love for the little boy in her arms.
‘You have such pretty eyes,’ she observed.
‘Eh,’ said Gabriel.
‘His dad’s,’ supplied Beth. ‘I didn’t know you could have dark skin and blue eyes.’
‘Maybe he’s magic,’ said Kerry, gently tickling his tummy. ‘I hope his dad comes.’
‘Me too,’ agreed Beth, her words heavy with worry. ‘I keep hoping his plane broke down, or that he couldn’t get into the city, or that his dad kept him locked up safe and wouldn’t let him come. But I have a feeling he’s...’
‘Run away,’ supplied Kerry, ‘like Aggie.’
‘Uh,’ said Beth, ‘yes, he’s run away.’
Kerry had a feeling Beth had another theory, but she didn’t push it. Despite offering hugs and sloppy cups of tea, people didn’t tend to want her around when they cried. No one needed her empathy.
They watched Sabrina’s chosen film for a while as Gabriel slept against Kerry’s chest, his breath a gentle rattle. The film was what Beth called “indie,” but Kerry still didn’t know what that meant. To her it was just plain boring; watching the baby sleep with his glossy little mouth open was much nicer.
A grunt and a curse signalled Preston’s awakening as the credits rolled on the screen, and Kerry turned just in time to see him disentangle himself from Larry. He felt around for his cigarettes and scowled when he couldn’t find them, his gaze falling on Kerry first.
‘You little shit,’ he snapped, stumbling over a still-snoring Larry and getting to his feet. ‘You can’t get away with hiding my fags anymore, you-’
‘Calm down, babe,’ Sabrina cut in. ‘I nicked a couple, they’re here with me.’
He caught them when she tossed them to him and he smirked at her, but Kerry could see the fury in his dark eyes. It was the look he used to give David when he locked the liquor away. There would be violence after that, violence Kerry pretended not to notice. David was bigger than Preston anyhow, so he never got more than one half-hearted blow in before he was calmly restrained. And that only happened when Preston didn’t take his tablets. But David always did things calmly and never lost his temper.
So Kerry buried her face in Gabriel’s hair as Preston strode across the room and hauled Sabrina to her feet, his grip vicelike on her wrist and his face inches from hers. Her smile faltered infinitesimally.
‘I think you know not to touch my things, babe,’ he hissed, tightening his grip and twisting, the smirk still stretching his mouth, ‘but in case you forgot let me remind you.’
Kerry felt the sofa lift beside her and Beth’s voice said, ‘You’re hurting her.’
‘Butt out,’ snarled Sabrina.
But Preston allowed her to wrench her fingerprinted wrist away anyway. For the first time in over a day he looked at Beth, and Kerry risked a glance at them. There was something unreadable on Preston’s face as he looked at the younger girl before him, and his fists uncurled. Sabrina looked between them, scowling, and threw herself back into the armchair.
Kerry could remember many pleasant mornings with David and Preston, where they made god-awful pancakes, threw them out the window and made cereal instead, laughing all the while. But she was also all too familiar with this version of Morning Preston, especially recently. She wished she knew how to go about getting his tablets, because something told her these horrible moods were some
thing to do with him not taking them.
Preston lit a cigarette, his eyes still locked with Beth’s, and Kerry felt scared for her new friend. She wouldn’t handle herself very well in a fight.
‘What are you still doing here?’ he eventually asked.
‘My boyfriend didn’t show,’ replied Beth evenly. ‘I want to leave when it’s safe.’
‘You’ve got a brat,’ he countered. ‘It’s not going to be safe for a long time.’
‘And what makes you think you know it all?’
‘Video games, mostly,’ he said thoughtfully. ‘Maybe my rough upbringing and a couple of dodgy movies too, but the fact is it’s a war zone out there. If your boyfriend didn’t bring his fancy helicopter and the army I’m afraid you’re fucked.’
‘He might still come yet.’
‘Trust me, sweetheart, he’s with another woman.’
‘Des wouldn’t do that.’
‘He would,’ Preston insisted, ‘and here’s how I know. He’s a bloke. No guy can resist apocalypse sex. The whole end-of-the-world sleep-with-a-stranger excitement is like hypnosis.’
‘That’s what Sabrina is to you, then.’
‘Pretty much,’ he laughed.
Revulsion came off Beth in waves, rivalled by the waves of disappointed hatred coming from Sabrina in the armchair. Kerry could practically see these girls’ reactions to Preston in two vibrant tidal waves that drowned him from either side, but he either didn’t notice or he didn’t care. It was safe to say either or both was true. Preston chuckled and took the empty seat next to Kerry, who he’d already forgotten about as soon as his cigarettes were discovered.
For the first time, Kerry wondered what was going to happen to her. She was only nine; she needed responsible adults, a warm fireplace, cereal, homework and stuffed animals. Could any of these people provide her with any of those things? She highly doubted it. Would Preston take her to Canterbury to be with her dad if she asked? Would he even hear her speak if she tried? What was to become of the baby in her arms?
Still standing over Preston, Beth folded her arms and huffed, seemingly fighting some sort of inner battle. Preston grinned at her, took a luxurious drag on his cigarette and opened his hands in invitation.
‘Worried about your man making the beast with two backs with another woman?’ he guessed. ‘We can get revenge on him if you like.’
‘You’re revolting,’ snapped Sabrina, throwing the TV remote at him, missing his head by a hair. To his credit he didn’t even flinch and his grin didn’t waver.
‘He’s not sleeping with other people,’ Beth insisted, ‘and even if he was, I’m a bit preoccupied with problems closer to home.’
‘You’re talking about your attraction to me.’
‘Wrong again,’ she retorted. ‘Gabriel is unwell.’
‘Who’s Gabriel?’ Preston looked around uncertainly.
‘My baby,’ she growled.
‘Oh, the baby,’ Preston laughed, ‘my bad! Well he’s just snotty, isn’t he? That’ll clear up, I reckon.’
‘Well forgive me if I don’t take your word for it,’ said Beth. ‘Even if it’s just Calpol, I want to get him some medicine.’
‘You know where the door is. I’m sure Carrie will hold the thing until you’re back.’
‘My child is not a-’ Beth sucked in a breath through her nose, closing her eyes to the amusement on Preston’s handsome features. ‘Look,’ she said, calmer, ‘I don’t feel comfortable going out there alone. What with all the weird noises we hear in the night and the twisted shit we’ve seen... I’d be in over my head.’
‘Bless,’ said Preston.
‘I’m asking you to come with me,’ Beth sighed.
‘Oh, none of what you just said sounded like a question. And I didn’t hear a please.’
Beth scowled. ‘Please.’
He grinned. ‘Should I wake Larry? Make this a group affair?’
Beth looked at the snoring clown, who had half-fallen off the mattress when Preston wrestled him off, and whose head lolled off the end. She scrunched up her nose.
‘No need,’ she said.
Sabrina sulked while Beth and Preston were gone, and Larry slept on, leaving Kerry and Gabriel to play alone. Kerry made a fort out of the sofa cushions, a clothes horse and a pile of blankets, watched disdainfully by Sabrina but offered no help. She didn’t mind though. When she was done she sat in her fort with the baby and played every game she could think of with him. Peek-a-boo seemed to be his favourite; he would laugh tirelessly and clap his appreciation.
When games got monotonous she sang to him, moving his little arms along to the words. Even Ratbag, Preston’s grumpy ginger cat, seemed charmed by Gabriel. He curled up next to the baby’s stumpy legs and went to sleep, unfazed when chubby fists seized clumps of his fur or when he was patted a little too hard.
It was only when he started to smell that Kerry encountered a problem. She left him tugging playfully on the cat’s tail as she searched through Beth’s bag for nappy-changing supplies. She found nappies and wet wipes easily enough, but the act itself was something else entirely. Which part of the nappy was the front, and where would she put the soiled one?
She started by laying him down on one of the blankets and struggling with removing his baby-grow, hoping the rest would come to her naturally. Gabriel burbled and kicked impatiently.
‘Um,’ she said uselessly.
The sounds of a glass bottle opening and the something along the lines of “useless cow” came from behind her, but she tried to ignore Sabrina.
She was gingerly peeling away the sticky tabs when the metal door screeched open and Beth appeared laden with carrier bags. Relief flooded Kerry as Preston shut the door behind them, and Gabriel squealed a delighted greeting to his mother.
‘Oh crap,’ said Beth, hurrying over.
‘You’re telling me,’ muttered Sabrina.
‘Sorry, Kerry,’ said Beth, ignoring Sabrina, ‘I didn’t even think to change him before we left. I’ll take over, you’re all right.’
‘It’s okay,’ said Kerry with a small smile, glad to hear her name said right for once. ‘It only just happened really, he’s been lovely up until now.’
‘That’s good. I’d hate to think you’d been struggling for an hour with no help from the moron in the armchair.’
‘Oi,’ barked Sabrina, ‘watch your mouth, bitch.’
‘Well she’s not wrong,’ Preston laughed, sitting on Sabrina’s lap for want of anywhere better, ‘you are a moron in an armchair.’
‘That makes two of us,’ she snarled, swiping at him as he confiscated her beer and took a big swig.
With deft and practised movements Beth successfully changed Gabriel’s nappy, and when she was done she helped Kerry dismantle the fort and restore order to the cellar. The cat, having had enough of being poked and prodded, got comfortable on top of the pile that was Sabrina and Preston.
Gabriel fell asleep on Kerry while his mother moved around the room, collecting empty beer bottles and empty ash trays. It was the first time Beth had done anything productive or even active since arriving, and she didn’t stop until she’d filled a bin bag and discarded it upstairs.
While she tidied she told Kerry about her outing with Preston. The streets varied from completely empty to full of looters, smashing windows and stealing cars. Twice they’d encountered zombies and Preston had fought them off, and Beth hadn’t failed to notice the pure enjoyment on his face as he took them out. They’d gotten medicine for Gabriel, another enormous case of lager, a multipack of crisps and several boxes of microwave chips, liberated from the shelves of a half-empty, unmanned supermarket.
‘It’s like every end-of-the-world film you’ve ever seen,’ Beth finished, and Kerry didn’t bother telling her she’d never seen such a film because she was enjoying the attention.
They stayed in the bunker for a week, and Gabriel slowly got better despite the occasional sleepless night courtesy of Preston, Larry and a bottle of
rum. Kerry gravitated towards Beth and her child, given that they were more or less normal and didn’t treat her like a useless piece of furniture. She was more than happy to keep Gabriel occupied if Beth got tired.
One night, Preston and Larry were having a drunken fight, and it wasn’t one of their usual play-fights. They seemed to think fighting to the death at three in the morning was an “epic” thing to do, and Kerry was petrified. She was pretty sure Beth could feel her shaking, but she at least made an effort to cry quietly so as not to disturb her further. But, naturally, Beth was disturbed. She was more than disturbed, in fact, she was fuming. Finally, when Sabrina’s yelling had proved fruitless and when the fighting seemed like it would never end, Beth thrust her child into Kerry’s arms, wrenched the steel door open and stormed upstairs.
Hugging Gabriel close, Kerry felt betrayed and abandoned by Beth, and she tried not to despair as she watched in the lamplight. Preston had managed to get Larry under him, and he now sat on his face, squashing cheeks between mattress and bottom. Larry yelled expletives and thrashed about, and Kerry almost didn’t notice when Beth returned with something large in her hand.
‘Kerry,’ she said quietly, settling what Kerry recognised as the guitar from the living room into her lap. ‘Are you okay?’
Kerry gulped and nodded. ‘We’re okay.’
‘Tell me,’ said Beth with an encouraging smile, ‘what’s your favourite song?’
‘Um,’ said Kerry, taking a beat to think. ‘I like Taylor Swift. Do you know her stuff?’
‘Of course,’ replied Beth, grinning as she began to strum.
Kerry lay down, curling her body around Gabriel, who sat and sleepily watched his mum. She offered the baby her finger, drawing comfort from the grip of his little hands, and she closed her eyes as Beth began to sing the opening lines to 'Love Story.'
Her voice was hushed and her singing was average, but she was playing the Princess Song and Kerry loved it nonetheless. Even the scuffling seemed to stop after a few lines of verse. Kerry opened her eyes and Preston was looking over, a strange expression on his face.
After The End (Book 1): The Furious Four Page 12
