Hold Me Forever (A Hockey Romance)

by Layla Hagen

  "Yes, yes. But where's the fun in knowing better?"

  "I agree," I said, "but it's not like I even have time to think about stuff like that."

  She rolled her eyes. "You can find time if you want to."

  That was probably true, but I really had my hands full. I loved my job, but the schedule was quite intensive. When I wasn't searching for volunteer placements, I was busy introducing our volunteers and setting up a plan and whatnot. And most of my free time was dedicated to finishing my house. I’d bought a small bungalow just outside the city, a two-bedroom house that a couple started building last year. They both got jobs in Arizona, though, so they had to relocate and sold the house before they could finish it.

  I got the keys already but couldn’t move in. I still had to get the floors and the bathrooms done. So far, I hadn’t had much time to search for construction crews. Truthfully, I wasn’t sure how I’d handle it financially. I was still renting my apartment, and I’d already started paying the mortgage. Those two charges ate up most of my paycheck, so I’d probably try to do some of the stuff myself.

  I couldn’t believe I was a homeowner at twenty-nine! Ever since I was a kid, I used to daydream about the house I’d own one day. I was sure my parents were smiling from somewhere above us, feeling proud.

  "So, you’re definitely not interested in Tyler?" Emma asked, snapping me out of my thoughts.

  "Nope.” Besides, even if he wanted to go out, I was sure he had plenty of puck bunnies to keep him occupied.

  "Hmm. Okay. Do you mind if I ask him out?"

  My eyes widened with shock. “You’d do that? Just outright ask him?” I didn't think anyone could say I was shy, but I had to admit I wouldn't just up and ask someone I barely knew on a date.

  "I don't know. He certainly looks hot."

  "No, I don't mind," I said. But I felt a funny twist in my stomach as I spoke.

  "Ha." She pointed at me, smiling triumphantly.

  "What?"

  "You look like a sad puppy. You totally would mind."

  "No, I just think it's... Okay, fine. I would. I don't know why, but I would."

  She grinned from ear to ear. "I guess that answers my question."

  "Which was?"

  "I'm going to leave you guessing for now. Come on, let’s grab something to eat."

  I shook my head, laughing as I stood from my chair. Tyler Maxwell was a superstar. I was 100 percent sure he’d perfected that charm by using it very often. I wouldn’t fall for that smile. But that smoldering look? That might be a bit harder to resist, but I was going to do my best.

  Chapter Three

  Tyler

  I was the third youngest in my family at thirty-one. Sometimes I described myself as the fourth oldest, depending on what the situation required. Sometimes I had no idea which suited me best, like right now. We were all gathered at my brother Tate’s house, enjoying breakfast on Saturday. Half my family was here.

  "You don't have to babysit me," I reminded them. Ever since I was benched, they made it their mission to leave me alone as little as possible. Even though I teased them about it, I enjoyed their support. I usually only had time in the summer to spend with my family, between hockey seasons. But by now, at the beginning of October, I was usually in the trenches with my teammates, training eight hours a day. The first game of the regular season was approaching. I hadn’t been to any of the preseason games.

  "We're not babysitting you," Reese said. "We’re keeping you company."

  "Exactly," my oldest brother, Declan, added. As a lawyer, he was always the most serious out of all of us, or maybe he became a lawyer because he was serious.

  "We can all watch the first game together from my living room," Tate suggested.

  Okay, I appreciated that they looked out for me, but this was too much coddling for my taste.

  My brother Travis winced. Apparently he picked up on the vibe too. The only ones missing were our brothers Luke and Sam. Sam had been here to celebrate when Travis sold his online startup and stayed after my accident, but he left yesterday to resume his stint abroad with Doctors Without Borders.

  Luke was the second oldest, right after Declan, but he couldn't be more different. He'd been the chief troublemaking officer growing up. Luke had all kinds of crazier-than-shit ideas and talked us into almost all of them.

  Travis, Sam, and I were a bit of both: sometimes the serious ones, sometimes the troublemakers. It depended heavily on what the situation required.

  "I appreciate your concerns, but I want to go watch it from the stands."

  "I can come with you and give you moral support," Reese said.

  I wondered if there was more to her offer. Her shitty ex-fiancé was finally completely out of her life, but that didn't mean she could forget everything that happened. I suspected she blamed herself because I was benched, and I wouldn't have any of it. I’d decided to go after him, and I’d fight for her honor any day. Sure, he provoked me, but I retaliated, and I took full responsibility for it.

  Reese smiled, batting her eyelashes, clearly waiting for a reply.

  "Way to make me feel ball-less, Reese."

  Gran groaned. "Language, young man."

  I cleared my throat. "Sorry, Gran."

  She gave me a knowing look.

  Declan frowned. "Why do you want to go watch it from the stands? That's going to be uncomfortable for you."

  "I'm not banned from actually going there, and I want to show support to my teammates." Oddly, Coach Benjamin didn’t want me to suit up on the bench with the guys like most players did when they were on the injured list. I asked him about it, and he didn’t give me much of an answer. He said some shit about how I needed to think things through before I got that privilege.

  Whatever. Hockey was my life. At my age, I was practically ancient , but I was also the best damn goalie in the league. I still had one season left, maybe two.

  "That's commendable," Tate said. "But I think it would suck for you. Especially since they didn’t want you dressed and there with the team while you’re recovering."

  Groaning, I looked at Gran as she frowned and tsked.

  "You boys are a bunch of misbehaving misfits today."

  "Aren't we always?" I wondered out loud.

  Gran tsked again. “Some days, you’re better than others, and I tell myself what a fine job I’ve done raising you. Other days, like today, I think I’m just fooling myself.”

  She spent a lot of time with us as kids—almost as much as my parents. We owed our somewhat good manners to her. Dad swore every chance he got even now.

  Travis came next to me, patting my good shoulder. "You know what? I’ll come with you to the game. I'm so attractive that everyone else will pay attention to me instead of you."

  I burst out laughing. That was a very Travis thing to say. He didn't take anything seriously, except perhaps his startup. But since he sold it just a month ago, he had a lot of time on his hands and had no clue what to do with it.

  My brother’s fiancé, Lexi, walked into the kitchen. She’d been in the backyard with my niece. It only took her a minute before she asked me, "Let me guess, everyone's on your case?"

  "One of the things I love most about you, future sister-in-law, is that you can read our family so well."

  "How did they figure it out about Kendra already? Did Tate spill the beans?"

  I groaned. She and Tate drove me to my meeting with Kendra the other day because I didn’t want to bother with another Uber, but they only stayed for a couple minutes.

  Tate laughed. "No, sweetheart. You just did.”

  “Wait, what? Who's Kendra?" Reese asked.

  Declan and Travis looked at me with interest.

  "The coordinator of the organization that management signed me up with,” I explained. “I just met her, and I have no idea what Lexi is going on about."

  "Right. You looked at her like you were smitten," Lexi informed everyone.

  "She’s hot. I just had an appropriate reaction
to a very sexy woman," I said with a lazy smile.

  Declan frowned. "You know you’ve got to focus on your recovery, right?"

  “Yes I do. Fucking chill, Declan.”

  I wasn’t interested in dating. Just before the fight, I had started seeing Blair, and we hit it off well. After the team announced they were benching me for the foreseeable future, she couldn't bolt fast enough. I wasn't interesting once I wasn't the team's goalie anymore. Ever since, I’d been on a self-imposed hiatus from dating. I had much more important things to focus on. Getting back on the ice was crucial.

  “Young man!” Gran exclaimed. “Your brothers and Reese just want the best for you.”

  "You know what? I’m going to check on my niece while you all decide among yourselves what the best is," I said, making Tate laugh.

  This was typical of my family, but as I said before, I didn't mind. I liked knowing they had my back. We always enjoyed helping each other out when possible, and when it wasn't possible, we were there for moral support. I was pretty sure their rallying around me like this was setting a new record in my family, though. I was proud of us. Mom and Dad raised us to stick together, and we were doing just that.

  They were right, however. Attending the game wouldn’t be easy, but I wanted to be there. Hockey was my life. It wasn’t all about making money. It had never been about that. We grew up with all the comforts money could buy. Grandma and Grandpa founded the Maxwell Bookstores chain in their youth. My parents and my uncle ran it with Grandma after Grandpa passed away. They sold it for a shit-ton when I was still in school, and they set up trust funds for each of us. I never touched mine. I didn’t need it—it was all about hockey for me, and fortunately the sport paid very well.

  In fact, none of us lived off our trust funds. Luke was a sought-after architect, and Tate had built an immensely successful wine business. I’d gotten the hockey bug early on, and Mom and Dad supported me through it all.

  When I was drafted, most of my teammates thought the Chicago Blades just took me on because of my last name. I’d worked hard to prove I deserved my spot. I never even had to play on the Blades’ farm team either, and that was because they needed a goalie on the roster ASAP. I made my family proud when I was positioned as first pick, the player all the sportscasters thought would deliver the goods. And I did.

  I headed out the back door that led to the yard. My brother’s enormous house was in the Lincoln Park neighborhood—a quiet area with larger homes and nice spacious yards. I lived in a condo in the West Loop. I liked feeling the pulse of the city: sirens, the hustle and bustle and all that goes with it.

  My niece, Paisley, was in the swing I’d tied up last week from the sturdy oak tree at the side of the property.

  “Having fun?” I asked her as she swung back and forth.

  “Yes, Uncle Tyler. Thank you so much for building this for me.”

  “You’re welcome.”

  She’d hinted that she wanted one and even showed me a few pictures on an app, so I surprised her with it on her birthday. Paisley had Mom’s green eyes and the trademark Maxwell dark brown hair. She didn’t look anything like Tate’s ex-wife.

  “Can you push me? I want to go really high.”

  I weighed the risks, but I was right here, ready to catch her if she lost her balance. Thanks to my years on the ice, I had quick reflexes.

  “Sure thing.” I planted my feet wide apart, pushing the swing with one hand and keeping my eyes trained on Paisley.

  She laughed, shrieking every time she went higher. A few minutes later, her enthusiasm lessened.

  “I’m getting a bit queasy,” she piped up, and I didn’t push her again.

  “Don’t move your legs anymore, and it’ll slow down. If I stop it abruptly, you’ll be sick for sure.”

  “Okay, Uncle Tyler.”

  It took a few more minutes for the swing to slow down, and then finally Paisley put one foot down, leaning her head on the rope she was holding.

  Her grin was huge. “This is fun. What are you doing out here?”

  “What do you mean? Can’t I spend time with my niece?”

  She narrowed her eyes. “Well, yeah... but you look like you’re running away from something. Are they teasing you? If you don’t tell me, I’ll just ask them.”

  I stared at her. She was ten years old. How did she already show signs of the Maxwell teasing genes?

  “Fine, they’re on my case about something.”

  She laughed, clapping her hands. “Ha! I knew it. And are they right about it? Wait, don’t tell me. I want to figure it out by myself.”

  “Why?”

  “How else will I hone my skills?”

  I laughed, unconsciously massaging my injured shoulder. I liked giving Declan shit, but he was right. I needed to focus on my recovery—both in the physical sense and my reputation. And yet I couldn’t take my mind off Kendra. She was sexy as hell, yes, but something else made me straighten up and pay attention. Her honesty and sense of humor were refreshing. Was she always that fun and unassuming?

  Fortunately, I’d have plenty of opportunities to find out.

  Chapter Four

  Kendra

  On Tuesday, I arrived half an hour early in Ashburn and parked at the back of the sports center directly next to the entrance of the ice rink. I took out my iPad and pulled up my email account. I was on a private mission, so I felt a bit guilty using my professional email and connections, but only just a little.

  Tim’s birthday was last week, and he’d shared with me that he’d wanted so badly to go to a water park with his friends and play on the slides, but his parents couldn’t afford it.

  I was trying to surprise him by taking him and his hockey friends to an indoor one. There were a lot of free pools in Chicago, but none had water parks that were actually entertaining. I wouldn’t get my next paycheck until after his birthday, so I couldn’t simply buy eleven tickets.

  Pinching pennies reminded me of the most stressful time in my family’s life, after Dad passed away. Mom had to take on three jobs to make ends meet. She didn’t even have time to mourn Dad. Emma and I were alone a lot, and the neighbors reported us to social services. It was terrible, and we both believed they should have minded their own business. Mom was doing the best she could. Because of them, we lived for years with constant check-ups and threats to send us to foster care. It was difficult, and it took a toll on Mom, who got sick when Emma was in college.

  I shook my head, dispelling those sad thoughts and focusing on the present. I had a solution for my cash-strapped situation. I just didn’t like it. Up until last year, I waitressed for a hole-in-the-wall diner at the end of the world on weekends, so I could earn a few extra bucks. I left after a customer grabbed my ass while I took his order. My boss, Jared, had witnessed it and done absolutely nothing. He still owed me two full months of paychecks, and I’d never asked him for it because I was too proud. But now it was time to set my pride aside and be practical.

  I sent him an email before I could talk myself out of it.

  Then I bit into my donut while racking my brain on how I could make this happen for Tim. I needed the afternoon pick-me-up badly.

  My phone chimed in the meantime.

  Tyler: I'll be there in a few minutes.

  I replied right away.

  Kendra: I'm in a red Ford five feet from the entrance.

  Tyler: I'll look for you.

  My stomach somersaulted. No, no, no. This won't do. I was determined not to notice his dazzling smile, let alone the rest of him. I wasn’t staying long today, just enough time to ensure he and the kids were on the right track with their first session. I wasn’t planning to stay for the rest.

  A few seconds later, there was a knock at my window. I startled and accidentally dropped my donut on the floor in front of the passenger seat. There was powdered sugar everywhere. Thank God I had leather seats.

  Tyler immediately opened the door.

  "Fuck," he exclaimed. "Do you have napkins?"


  "Yeah, yeah, I have some."

  I had wet wipes in my purse, and I'd grabbed a few napkins when I bought the donut. I vigorously cleaned up the seat with the wet wipes, and Tyler used the napkins to dry them. His hand accidentally brushed mine during our ministrations, and I was completely unprepared for the jolt of heat coursing through me. I raised my eyes to his—big mistake. I was looking straight at his lips. I moved my gaze farther up, right into those dazzling brown eyes.

  My sister's words came to mind. Yeah, “hot” doesn't do him justice, not even a little.

  I thought I could ignore that smile, huh? Well, maybe I could, but there was no way I could forget his eyes. They were dark and sinful.

  "Way to make an entrance," I teased, glancing at the duffel bag he was carrying, which probably contained his skates.

  "I did say I was coming in a few minutes."

  "Yeah, I know, but then I got lost in my research for a pool for Tim, and now my donut—”

  I stopped, watching in horror as he took the donut off the floor and threw it in the nearby bin. Why did he do that? He just wasted a perfectly good donut. I was just going to blow off the dust, which I knew did nothing for germs, but who cared?

  I tried to smile at him when he returned, but it probably looked a bit manic because he raised a brow.

  “I’m dangerous in the afternoon without a snack.”

  "Clearly," he said with a dazzling smile. Amusement played in his eyes.

  Oh, he’s making fun of me, is he? Well, to be honest, I was completely ridiculous without my sugar fix.

  "Come on. We still have time. I'll buy you another donut.”

  My heart thundered in my chest. I hesitated for a bit.

  He sat in the clean passenger seat, tilting closer to me. "Come on. You don't want to be dangerous for the rest of the afternoon, do you? Who knows what else might happen?"

  I chuckled, running a hand through my hair. "You got me there. Okay, come on. The donut stand is just around the corner.”

  I grabbed my bag and iPad, and we walked side by side. My stomach was grumbling. “This was my lunch.”