by Webster, K
“Go fish, got my wish,” Taylor chirps from beside me in the waiting room. “I win again.”
I ruffle his blond hair. “You win every time, Noodle Butt.”
“It’s because I’m better, Dum-Dum Dad.”
He always calls me Daniel or Dr. Dum-Dum. This is new. I try to play it off like it’s not a big deal, but my heart soars. And I really need my heart to soar because I’m stressed as fuck.
“You’re pretty amazing,” I agree, swallowing down my emotion.
He’s ours on paper. A son. Incredible. But I was prepared for him to call me Daniel for the rest of his life. Not Dad. I didn’t want to pressure him. But I sure as hell won’t try and stop him.
“Mom’s going to be okay,” he tells me in a matter-of-fact tone.
My heart burns inside my chest and I fight tears, nodding at him.
“He’s right,” my mom says as she sits down on my other side. “Our girl’s a fighter.”
That she is.
I lift my gaze and catch Landon’s from across the room. He’s pale with dark circles under his eyes. Callie and her dad, August, are sitting beside him in support. The two people Landon loves most are in that operating room. I want to pull him into my arms and thank him for letting his dad go in there with her, but I don’t want to embarrass him. Plus, he has his support network and I have a little boy who needs me to be strong.
Time passes too slowly, but thankfully I have Gold Fish on the iPad to entertain me. Taylor whips my ass every round, much to his delight. Just when I’m about to climb the walls with anxiety, Dr. Davis, the surgeon, strides down the hall. I toss the iPad in Mom’s lap and jog over to him. Landon is hot on my heels.
“Surgery went well,” he assures me, smiling. “Of course only time will tell if it’ll be rejected or not, but there’s no reason why the transplant won’t take. And while we were in there, we performed a nephrectomy on the damaged kidney since it was causing so much trouble. As you know, it’s common to leave the diseased organs in there, but it was extremely large and overrun by cysts, so in order to make room, it needed to be removed.”
By removing the problem kidney, this could mean she’ll be pain free one day.
“How is Teddy?”
“He’s been in SICU for a while now. Lauren just came out. In another hour or two…” he trails off, smirking. “In another hour or two the family can come in to see them one at a time. But doctors, on the other hand, they have free rein as far as I’m concerned.” He winks at me before walking off.
I grip Landon’s shoulder. “I’ll text you and let you know how they’re doing.”
As if my ass is on fire, I rush down the hallway to SICU, stopping by my office to grab a lab coat. A nurse lets me into the surgical intensive care unit and I head up to the front desk where a familiar head nurse named Mae is writing something in a chart.
“Dr. Venable,” she greets in her no-nonsense tone, not lifting her gaze. “You’re not supposed to be in the SICU.” She finally looks up and cocks an eyebrow up as she scrutinizes me. This woman runs a tight ship, but she’s not immune to my good boy charm. I flash her a winning smile. “Oh, please, honey, like I ever had a chance of denying you access back here. Now Morris, on the other hand.” She tsks. “That boy is something else. Curtains two and three, hon.”
“Thanks, Mae.”
I rush over to curtain two. Lauren is being looked over by a male nurse. She’s still out of it as she comes off the anesthetic. I grab her hand and kiss her forehead.
“How is she?” I ask, my voice gruff.
“Vitals are good. Dr. Davis explained that surgery was a success?”
“He did.”
“She’s a trooper.”
Someone loudly moans one curtain over. “Laurennnn.” Teddy.
I leave my wife to go check on her father. He’s lucid, but his eyes are wild. Rushing over to him, I grip his hand.
“She’s okay, Teddy. Lauren is right next door. Surgery was a success for both of you. They took out the diseased kidney too.”
He smiles and closes his eyes. Tears leak out of the corners of his eyes. “My baby girl is okay.” He scratches at his arm, frowning. “I itch. Why do I itch?” His unfocused eyes meet mine again, confusion swimming in them.
“You might be having a reaction to the morphine,” I say, peeking my head out of the curtain. “Mae, can you come here?”
Mae makes her way over to his bed and checks his chart. “Teddy Bear, we’re going to switch you to a different pain medication. Okay, honey?”
He doesn’t answer, simply claws at his arm some more. As soon as she scurries off, I take his hand again and pull out my phone with the other.
“Where’s my baby boy?” Teddy asks, his brows pinched.
“He’s waiting outside. He’ll come see you soon. I’m texting him now to let him know you’re okay. Anything you want me to tell him?”
He nods but doesn’t say anything, his eyes drooping. I quickly fire off a text to Landon to let him know his dad loves him. I’m sure if he’d stayed awake long enough, he would’ve told me. When Mae comes over to give him some meds, I slip away to check on Lauren again.
I sit with her for what feels like a long time, my anxiety high, until I hear it.
A whimper.
A soft cry.
Her beautiful face crumples as she comes to.
“Shhh,” I coo. “You made it, angel.”
“It hurts,” she whispers.
Mae walks over and checks her vitals. I can’t take my eyes off my wife’s face. She made it through. They both made it through.
“I’m going to get you some more pain meds, hon,” Mae promises. “Let this good doctor take care of you.”
I pull Lauren’s hand up and kiss the back of it before letting it rest. As she comes off the anesthesia, she becomes crabby and teary. Back and forth I go check on her and her father until Teddy gets discharged to a room. They push his bed past hers and stop it where she can see him.
“I love you, Daddy,” she chokes out. “Thank you.”
He smiles despite the pain he’s in. “Anything for you, baby girl.”
They steer his bed away.
“Where’s my boy?” Her brown eyes are filled with tears. “Where’s Taylor?”
I grin at her. “Probably beating his new grandma’s ass on Gold Fish.”
“He’s really good at that game.” She closes her eyes and smiles. “Landon?”
“Landon’s good. Everyone is here.”
“Jenna?”
“Cora’s sick, so they’re keeping her home. The last thing we need is you or Teddy catching something.”
She drifts off and I keep staring at her. So beautiful. Alive. Mine.
I’m in a zone when I hear a familiar voice.
“Awww, come on, Mae-Mae. You love me.”
“Boy, I will whoop your ass.”
I bite back a snort. Morris.
Leaving Lauren for a moment, I walk over to where Morris is leaned against the nurse station, smirking at Mae. She has her hands on her hips, shaking her head at him.
“Mae’s mean,” he tattles when I walk up. “How’s your girl?”
“She’s great. Perfect. And leave Mae alone,” I chide.
She nods. “Listen to the good doctor.”
“And what am I? The bad doctor?”
“You’re the dumbass doctor, boy. Get it right.”
“You keep calling me boy and I gotta say, Mae, I’m into it.” He waggles his brows at her. “How’s Monique? You want to let me take her out?”
“She already has a man, hon.”
“Ehh, she’s hot, though.”
“Monique is a diva, boy. She’d chew you up and swallow you whole.”
“Again, Mae, I’m totally into it.” He laughs.
“You’re into everything, freak,” I playfully grumble. “Leave Mae alone and come say hello to Lauren.”
I drag him away before Mae decides to knock his ass out. And I wouldn’t
put it past her either. He sobers up when he sees Lauren, slipping into concerned doctor mode.
“They took the kidney or leave it in?”
“He took it.”
“I’m no surgeon, but I would have done the same,” he says in agreement. “How you doing, Barbie?”
She cracks her eyes open and manages to flip him off. He and I both laugh to see that her sense of humor is already returning.
A weight that has been crushing me since the day I laid eyes on the beautiful, but sick girl, finally lifts. I pull out a root beer sucker and place it in her hand. Brown eyes meet mine and she smiles.
“Thanks, Dr. Dum-Dum.”
“I’m winning,” Lauren says, wincing when she looks over her shoulder at her dad.
“Then it’s a good thing I’m here instead of Landon,” Teddy replies with a chuckle that makes him flinch in pain. “I’d never hear the end of it.”
“Awww, poor Dad. Losing to a girl.” Her eyes flash with triumph when she slowly makes it to the end of the hall to me.
“Be nice to him,” I tell her, collecting her in my arms. “He’s an old man.”
The old man manages to flip me the bird, making me laugh.
It’s been two days since the surgery. They’re supposed to be walking around as Teddy leaves soon. And while Lauren seemingly is doing better, she requires a little more recovery time.
“Here,” I say, handing two suckers to Lauren and kissing her lips. “Give one of these to your dad whenever he makes it here. I need to get back to work.”
After a quick wave, I head back down to the ER. Before I round the corner, a little black boy about seven or eight comes around the corner. When he sees me, he grins.
“Hi,” he says, waving his hand hard. “I’m Derek. I have a metal leg. I’m part robot.”
“Hi, Robot Derek. I’m Dr. Dum-Dum.”
He cheeses at me. His eyes are slightly crossed, but he seems to see just fine.
“Are you lost?” I ask, looking around for a parent.
“I’m looking for my dinosaur friend. We brought him here, but it’s taking a long time,” he explains. “I miss my dinosaur friend.”
“Oh yeah? What’s your friend’s name? I can help you look for him.”
“Ollie. He has a dinosaur egg helmet.” Then, he tries to whisper, but his voice still carries. “Ollie has epilepsy and hits his head a lot. That’s why we’re here.”
I remember Ollie. The kid from the bookstore.
“There you are,” Anna scolds, looking frazzled. “You can’t run off like that, Derek. I thought someone stole you!”
“How about you stay here and I’ll go check on Ollie, okay?” I reach into my pocket and pull out a cherry Dum-Dum. “You like suckers?”
He beams. “I love suckers.”
“I’ll be right back,” I promise.
Once in triage, I hunt down Lin to see if she can help me find Ollie. After a quick update by her and I peek at his chart, she points to the fourth room and I head that way. Ollie, not wearing his normal helmet, lies in the bed with tears in his eyes.
“Hey, Mr. Dinosaur,” I say, waving as I enter.
His eyes light up. “Dr. Venable!”
“How are you doing, kiddo?” I ask, sitting at the foot of his bed.
“I want to go back to Anna’s and color with my best friend Derek. We’re making a comic book about a dinosaur and a robot.” He smiles at me. “Can you give me a sucker to make me feel better and I can leave?”
I pull out a sucker and hand it to him. Blue raspberry. “Tell you what. I’ll see what I can do, okay? We just want to make sure you’re feeling okay before we send you away. Even dinosaur boys need checkups.”
Morris waltzes in and winks when he sees me. “Nurse Lin said she could part with a juice or a Jell-O, but not both,” he says, setting a juice in Ollie’s lap. Then, he pulls out a Jell-O from his pocket. “Our secret, little man. I got you both. She doesn’t know you’re part dinosaur.”
Ollie is happy, so I leave him with Morris and make my way back out to Anna, who’s now in the waiting room with Derek and three other kids. Her patience seems to be wearing thin and two kids are pouting beside her, seemingly in time-out.
“Ollie is doing great. Eating Jell-O and making friends,” I tell Derek. Then, to Anna I say, “Can we talk a sec?”
She nods. “If I catch you two fighting again, I’ll be calling your caseworker. You know I don’t tolerate fighting.” The two boys around twelve scowl at her.
I walk her away from the kids and give her the rundown on his results. She is only halfway listening and when the boys start fighting again, she is on the move, whipping out her phone to call the caseworker.
I let out a heavy sigh. “Does anyone care about him?” I mutter to myself.
“I do,” Derek says. “When he gets better, we’re going to run away.”
Squatting down in front of him, I frown. “Why’s that, Robot Derek?”
“Because the other kids are mean,” Derek explains. “I know you think because I have cerebral palsy that I can’t run.” He lifts his chin. “I can run really fast.”
“Anna seems nice,” I tell him. “Have you talked to her?”
“Anna doesn’t love us,” Derek replies, his eyes crossing harder when tears form. “We’re going to go on a hunt.”
“A hunt?”
“For people who do.”
I scrub my palm down my face, trying to chase away the ache inside me. For so long I went through life focused on my career and not much else. Then Jenna came into my life. A daughter. My heart cracked open then, and I started to not just live, but love. And now that my heart is open and ready, that love isn’t isolated to a daughter or a wife. It’s spreading like a fire, flaming wider and reaching for those who need the warmth.
Like Taylor Dum-Dum.
It makes me wonder if Robot Derek and Mr. Dinosaur want to be Dum-Dums with us too.
“Can I tell you a secret?” I smile at Derek.
“I like secrets.”
“This secret is really important. Only you and Ollie can know it.”
He nods, smiling, no longer teary-eyed.
“There’re people out there who will love you,” I assure him. “And you won’t have to look for them. They’ll come to you.”
“How do you know this?”
“Because it happened to me. That’s how I found my daughter and my wife. And my son Taylor.”
“Wow, cool,” he breathes.
“And if you run away, they may not be able to find you.” I stand and pat his head. “Can you promise me something, Robot Derek?”
“Yes.”
“Promise me you won’t run away. Promise me you’ll let them find you.”
His face falls, but he nods. “I hope they don’t take too long. We’re lonely.”
“You have each other,” I assure him. “But don’t worry, they’re out there looking for you right now.”
Lauren
One year later…
Someone giggles and I lift a brow, fighting a smile.
“I heard that,” I say with mock gruffness. “You’re supposed to be studying. All of you.”
They all burst out laughing at once and I can’t ignore it this time. I start laughing too. At this rate, we’ll never get our homework done.
“You guys are a bad influence,” I tell them.
“Maybe we should eat ice cream instead of working,” Taylor offers. “Dad bought root beer. We could have root beer floats.”
“Yeah!” Ollie and Derek say in unison.
Root beer.
It’s my weakness.
And, thankfully, one of my few weaknesses these days thanks to my transplant.
“Fine,” I huff. “We’ll have root beer floats, but whoever tells Dad has to do dishes for a week.”
“Tell Dad what?” Daniel asks, sauntering into the kitchen wearing a smirk.
“I give up,” I groan.
All three boys giggle again. It’
s the sweetest sound in the world.
“Root beer floats instead of homework, I gather?” Daniel asks as he starts pulling out the ice cream and soda.
The boys abandon me at the kitchen table to help. They circle around Daniel, eager and excited. I can’t help but watch them.
Our boys.
When I was home recovering, Daniel brought something up to me. Two foster boys who were best buds. Two little guys who needed love—a love only we could give. My new kidney may have been working like a champ, but my heart broke for them. As soon as I met Robot Derek and saw Mr. Dinosaur again, I had an overwhelming urge to love and protect them. Jenna calls it a motherly instinct, and apparently I have one. We did what we had to do amidst my healing and made it happen.
They’re ours now.
Just like Taylor.
My three little bears.
And their momma feels incredible. She’s never going to leave them, no matter what her future health throws at her. Never.
Daniel is handsome today, having just come home from work. He still wears a tie and a nice shirt, but he’s since rolled up his sleeves to keep from getting ice cream on them. His smile is crooked and silly as he chats with the boys about their day. I could stare at my family forever. They’re perfect. More than I could have ever dreamed up for myself.
I’ve given up on homework and close my psychology textbook. I should be worrying about what I’ll cook for supper tonight, but I can’t find it in me to worry. Not when I can watch my boys as they babble about how they each think root beer floats came into existence.
“It was aliens,” Derek says, deadly serious. “I saw it on YouTube.”
Daniel shakes his head. “You can’t believe everything on the Internet.”
“Oh boy,” Taylor groans. “Here we go again.”
They continue to argue, but Ollie slips away to bring me a root beer float. It’s messy and dripping all over my newly mopped floors, but I don’t mind. It’s the thought that counts. His helmet is in place and I’m happy he’s wearing it. Though he’s had less seizures the older he gets, he still hasn’t been cleared to not wear it as often. I hug him to me and he nuzzles his face into my hair.
“I love you, Momma,” he says, melting my heart. “Thank you for finding us.”
My eyes burn with tears as I pat his back. “I love you too, baby.”
