by Sarah Hope
Opening her mouth, Molly closed it again. She could imagine. She could picture what it would do to Lauren and Ellis. It had taken them years to get used to the fact that she and Trevor had split, and even now, something as simple as going to the same farm park they had visited as a family unit would trigger Ellis into asking why she and Trevor couldn’t get back together. Molly shook her head. Even with Jessica and Ruby on the scene, Ellis seemed to still think it was a possibility.
Sniffing and patting her heavily mascaraed eyes, Diane looked over at Molly. ‘You see, I’m now wondering what’s going on and having visions of having to break my daughter’s heart again. She’s only just come to terms with me and her dad, Richie, splitting up and now...’
What was Molly supposed to say? She hadn’t even thought that he was particularly friendly with Diane still. After what he’d told her, she had assumed that the only contact he had with her was when their daughter was picked up and dropped off. He hadn’t mentioned anything else about her other than how they had split up. Lacing her fingers together in her lap, Molly looked down at the floor.
‘I’m sorry. I’ll go now. I just didn’t know what to do, I didn’t know whether to come and speak to you or not. I’m sorry.’ Slipping her tissue back into her handbag, Diane stood and walked towards the door.
Staring at the floor, Molly heard the click of the front door as Diane left. Why would he get back with her after she had broken his heart?
And there it was. A slow low laugh rose up from her throat. There it was. When Richie had first told her about how Diane had run a clothes shop from Bramble Patch, he had been upset. Resting her head in her hands, she closed her eyes. How could she have been so stupid? So naïve? He’d been so funny with her when they’d first met and it had all been because she had brought Bramble Patch, and then when he’d stepped inside for the first time, he’d been talking about her. He obviously still had feelings for her.
But he had been telling her how Diane had hurt him so much, why would he risk another relationship with her? Molly shook her head. People in love, properly in love, don’t see the obvious. They’re blind to the doubts.
Pinching the bridge of her nose, she leant back against the cushions. She would not cry. She would not. It wasn’t even as though they’d actually properly begun a relationship or anything. But she’d definitely felt a connection. She’d allowed herself to think what a possible future might look like. She should have known better.
Chapter Fifteen
Hold on, hold on. Placing the pile of clothes in her arms down on her bed, Molly ran down the stairs just as the doorbell rang again. It would be Lauren and Ellis. She checked her watch; they were actually fifty-five minutes early rather than the usual forty-five minutes late.
Turning the door handle, Molly jumped back as Ellis pushed the door open. Twisting, she watched him throw open the door to the flat and disappear up the stairs. ‘Remember to take your shoes off, please, Ellis!’
‘Hey, Mum.’ Coming into the shop, Lauren dumped her rucksack down at her feet.
‘Hi, Lauren.’ Leaning forward, she kissed Lauren on the forehead before turning to Trevor. ‘What’s up with Ellis?’
Shrugging and rolling his eyes, Trevor glanced behind him at the car. ‘He’s in a strop because he got told off. I’d better get going, I need to get things ready for work tomorrow.’
‘Right, okay. Thanks for bringing them back.’
‘See you in a couple of weeks, Lauren. Bye, Molly.’
‘Bye.’ Shutting the door, Molly turned towards Lauren. ‘Have you had a good weekend?’
‘It’s been okay.’ Shrugging out of her coat, she picked up her rucksack. ‘I’m going to go and watch TV.’
‘Okay. Before you go though, do you know why Ellis is so upset?’
‘He was told off, like Dad said.’ Turning, Lauren followed Ellis up to the flat.
Frowning, Molly checked she’d locked the door and walked slowly around the shop. After Diane’s surprise visit, she’d only just managed to get everything in place so Bramble Patch would be ready to open in the morning. She’d refilled all the shelves she could and anything that she hadn’t had in stock out the back, she’d rearranged the other stock on the shelves so it didn’t look obvious.
Closing the door joining the shop to the flat’s hallway, she locked it and made her way up the stairs. She’d pop and check in on Ellis before jumping in the shower. After spending the afternoon shifting boxes and stock, she was sure she had a layer of dust covering her.
‘ELLIS? YOU OKAY, SWEETHEART?’ Pushing his bedroom door open, Molly leant against the doorframe. Ellis was lying face down on top of his duvet. His coat and shoes still on. ‘Can you take your shoes off, please? You know you’re not allowed them on up in the flat. I don’t want dirt trodden around.’
‘Leave me alone.’
‘Hey, what’s the matter? Why are you so upset?’ Leaning down, she moved the rucksack he’d taken to Trevor’s out of her path and walked towards the bed. ‘Come on, let’s get those shoes off. I changed your bed this morning, you don’t want your dirty shoes all over your clean duvet cover, do you?’ Biting down on her bottom lip, Molly reached towards Ellis’s feet. ‘Hey, let me help you.’
‘I said, leave me alone.’ Squirming away from her, Ellis shouted out.
‘Okay. Just take your shoes off and then I’ll leave you alone.’ She hadn’t had time to put the washing machine on yet. If he got mud on his duvet, he’d have to sleep with it like that. Shaking her head, she tried to push away all thoughts of the germs his trainers would be carrying which were already all across his bed.
‘All right, I’ll take my stupid shoes off.’ Sitting up, he pulled his trainers off and flung them across the floor before taking his coat off, scrunching it up and chucking it towards her.
Looking at his flushed red face, his eyes swollen from crying, Molly sat on the bed next to him, resting her hand on his back. ‘What’s happened, sweetheart? You can tell me.’
‘I don’t want to talk about it.’ Taking a big gasp in between sobs, Ellis squirmed away from her touch. ‘Leave me alone. Just... just leave me alone.’
‘Oh, darling. Okay, I’ll leave you be for a bit and come and check on you in a few minutes.’ Pushing herself to standing, she looked back at him. She hated seeing him like this and not being able to help, but if she gave him a little space then hopefully he’d be more willing to talk and tell her what had happened. Trevor had told him off millions of times before and he’d never come home inconsolable before. Maybe Lauren would be able to shed some light on what he was so upset.
‘LAUREN, LOVE. CAN YOU tell me what happened to make Ellis so upset?’ Perching on the arm of the sofa, Molly looked down at Lauren who was sat curled up under the throw, remote control in hand, flicking through the channels.
‘I don’t know.’
‘Stop for a moment, please?’ Holding out her hand, she waited until Lauren had passed her the control. ‘Thank you. You can have it back in a moment, I’m just worried about Ellis. I haven’t seen him get so upset after getting back from Dad’s before.’
‘I’ve told you. He got told off.’
Slipping off the arm of the sofa, Molly sat down next to her. ‘Okay. It just seems odd that he’s so upset. I mean, your dad has told him off numerous times before and he’s never usually like this. Are you sure there isn’t something else?’
‘I don’t know. I don’t know how his brain works, do I? Jessica told him off because he hurt Ruby or something. But she was being a brat to him anyway, so she got what she deserved, if you ask me. Now, can I have the remote back, please? I really need to watch this, everyone’s going to be talking about it at school tomorrow.’
‘Yes, sorry. Here you are.’ Standing up, Molly passed Lauren the remote. ‘Do you want a hot chocolate?’
‘No, thanks.’ Holding up a bottle of fizzy drink, Lauren took a gulp.
Shaking her head, Molly bit her tongue. However many times she aske
d to Trevor not to keep giving them fizzy drinks, they still came home with them. Once in a while wouldn’t be a problem, but from what Lauren had told her in the past, that’s all they drank when they were with him.
She walked into the kitchen and switched the kettle on. It wasn’t important. Not really. As long as they brushed their teeth, two days of drinking sugary drinks every fortnight wasn’t going to hurt.
BALANCING THE PLATE of toast on top of the mug she was carrying, Molly gently tapped on Ellis’ door before walking in. ‘You okay? I’ve got some hot chocolate and some toast. With marmite and cheese, just the way you like it.’
Grumbling from beneath the duvet, Ellis rolled himself into a ball, the duvet mounding up on top of him.
Lowering herself down on the side of the bed, Molly rubbed his back with her free hand before taking the plate of toast back from its precarious position on top of the mug. ‘Why don’t you sit up and have a bit of toast and a drink? It might make you feel better?’
The lump under the duvet moved further up the bed.
‘We don’t have to talk about what happened, about why you’re upset, if you don’t want to. You can just eat your toast if you want.’
A mumbling noise filtered through the duvet.
‘Sorry, sweetheart, what did you say?’ Tilting her head, Molly strained to hear.
Peeking out from underneath the duvet, Ellis looked at her, his tear-stained face red from crying. ‘I said, do you think I’m a horrible bully, too?’ As quickly as he’d emerged, he flung the duvet back over his head.
‘What?’ Blinking, Molly reached across and set the plate and mug down on the bedside table. ‘Who called you that?’
‘It doesn’t matter, forget I said anything.’ His voice, each word interrupted by fresh sobs, sounded so quiet and young.
‘It does matter, sweetheart. No one should call you that.’ Shuffling closer to where he was curled up, Molly rubbed his back through the duvet again. ‘You’re a lovely, kind, thoughtful boy, you know that, don’t you?’
‘I’m not.’
Who had said that to him? Trevor, she’d be having words with him when she next saw him. How dare he call his own son a horrible bully? Yes, Ellis could get a little energetic sometimes, but when he did, that was just a sign that he needed a little direction. That he needed someone to suggest something for him to do. He didn’t have a ‘horrible’ bone in his little body. And he certainly wasn’t a bully. Taking a deep breath, she blew out through her nose. ‘Daddy didn’t mean to call you that. Sometimes, people say things when they get cross, but they don’t mean them. Everyone gets cross sometimes. I do, don’t I? Sometimes when you or Lauren aren’t doing what I’ve asked you to do, I get cross, but I still love you and that’s the same with Daddy.’
Not that she’d ever called him a bully and ever would. Taking her mobile out of the back pocket of her jeans, she scrolled through to Trevor’s name. Whatever had happened, it was still upsetting Ellis so the sooner Ellis spoke to his dad again and realised all was forgotten and he hadn’t meant it, the better.
‘No, no. Don’t call Dad.’ Throwing the duvet back, Ellis plunged towards his mum, knocking the mobile to the floor.
‘Ellis!’ Jerking her head towards him, her face softened. His eyes were bloodshot as fresh tears streamed down his already damp cheeks. ‘Okay, I won’t ring him, but you need to tell me what happened and why he called you that.’
‘It wasn’t him.’ Picking up his much-loved soft toy dog, floppy from the number of hugs it had received over the years, he rubbed the ears against his cheek.
‘Who was it then?’ If it hadn’t been Trevor, who else had been there that could have called him that. Yes, Lauren teased him, and, yes, sometimes the way they teased each other did get out of hand, but if it had been Lauren, Ellis wouldn’t have got this upset.
Covering his face with the dog, Ellis mumbled, ‘It was Jessica.’
Opening and closing her mouth, Molly froze. She suddenly felt cold, very cold. Jessica had called her boy a bully, a horrible bully at that. Reaching out, Molly drew Ellis in for a hug and kissed the top of his head, his normally smooth blonde hair spiking up after being under the duvet for so long. ‘What happened, sweetheart?’
Taking a deep shuddering breath, Ellis looked down at his toes. ‘I was playing cars in my bedroom. I had them all set up on the car mat I’ve got there. You know, like the one I’ve got here but a bit smaller so I have to squash the cars up a bit. And I’d got them all where I wanted them, I’d laid the traffic jams out and the car park was full, so I was ready to play and Ruby came along and started kicking them about.’
‘Oh okay. By accident or on purpose?’
‘On purpose. She does that, she likes to mess up my games and when I tell Dad or Jessica, they just say she’s too young to understand and she doesn’t mean to mess them up. But she does, she does mean it. I know she does because she smiles and laughs when I get upset. And when they say she’s too young to understand, I know she’s not and that it’s just their excuse for letting her get away with anything. She’s four and she’ll be starting school in September and I don’t remember being allowed to kick toys and mess around with other people’s games when I went to school. Mrs Packton would have counted down to me, wouldn’t she?’
Molly could picture Ellis’ Reception teacher, Mrs Packton having one of her silent meltdowns that she used to do when a pupil of hers didn’t listen or was acting up. She used to close her eyes and count back from ten on her fingers before opening her eyes again. Molly used to laugh when Ellis used to tell her after some friend or other had been naughty at school until she’d witnessed it for herself when running late after a dentists appointment and walking in to help Ellis find his peg. She remembered a child had begun playing with the Playdough when they should have been sat listening to the register. Molly shook her head, Mrs Packton had certainly had the magic. So, yes, Ruby was old enough to know what she was doing was wrong. ‘Yes, Mrs Packton would have, but maybe Ruby doesn’t know. She only has you and Lauren round twice a month, so maybe she just doesn’t understand how to share yet.’
‘Maybe, but Daddy and Jessica need to teach her before she goes to school then.’
‘Yes, they do, and I’m sure if you had told them what Ruby had been doing they would have told her to stop.’
‘They don’t. They never do. It’s always me in the wrong. They always say I should have played it up in my room or not where Ruby is playing. That’s why I didn’t play downstairs. That’s why I played in my room so I was right away from her and she still came to find me and mess up my cars.’
‘So, what happened after she’d kicked your cars? Did you tell your dad or Jessica?’
‘Yes, I went downstairs and told them and they said the usual things, so I went back up and shut my bedroom door to play, but she still came in and this time she kicked them about again. So I gave her some cars of her own and set my other car mat up for her. It’s a lot smaller and made of plastic, but I thought she’d still like to play with it.’
‘And did she?’
‘Only for a little while and then she got back up and kicked my cars again. She kicked them so hard at me that one of them hit my head. Look.’
Peering at Ellis’ head as he held his hair apart, Molly smoothed her finger along his scalp. There was a cut, not a deep one, but one that must have hurt. ‘Oh, sweetheart, are you okay? Did you have it cleaned up?’
‘No, I didn’t tell Daddy or Jessica.’ Pulling away from her hand, he hugged his dog.
‘Why not?’
Biting down on his bottom lip, Ellis then buried his face into the ears of his dog.
‘Ellis. What happened? What’s making you so upset?’
Keeping his face buried in the folds of the large floppy ears, Ellis mumbled through the fabric, ‘I pushed her. I pushed Ruby, and she fell over. I only did it because I’d asked her to stop again and again and then she’d kicked that car at me and hurt me and I just stood up
and pushed her and she fell on the floor.’
‘Okay. Hey, don’t cry. It’s okay. Was she hurt?’
‘No, she only fell on my rug but then she started screaming and crying and Daddy and Jessica ran upstairs. And she told them that I’d pushed her and Jessica called me a horrible bully and said I should be ashamed of myself. What does ashamed mean?’ Fresh tears began streaking down his cheeks again before rolling down the ears of his dog.
Drawing his small body closer, Molly kissed his head. ‘It doesn’t matter. Did you tell them what she’d done? That she’d been kicking your cars and hurt your head.’
Ellis shook his head as his body began shuddering with sobs.
‘Why didn’t you tell them?’
‘Because it wouldn’t have mattered. I’d said before she’d been kicking them and they hadn’t done anything. It’s all about Ruby. Daddy loves Ruby more than me.’
Blinking back her own tears, Molly tried to suppress the hot angry muddle rising from her stomach. ‘He doesn’t, sweetheart. He loves you all the same.’
‘No, he doesn’t. He loves her more and Jessica doesn’t even like me.’
Holding his shaking body, Molly stroked his hair and rocked him. ‘He loves you, he loves you all the same. And Jessica loves you too. She’s been with Daddy from before Ruby was born and loves you too.’
‘No, they don’t. They really don’t. You don’t understand. Ruby gets away with everything, but if me or Lauren says or does something wrong, we’re always told off.’ Lifting his head up, he took a rasping breath. ‘They hate us and they think I’m a horrible bully.’
‘Oh, sweetheart, they don’t hate you. They love you. You should have spoken up and told them what had happened and then they would have understood.’ Not that there was any excuse for calling him a bully. No excuse whatsoever.
