Elizabeth laughed and turned back to Georgiana, “It appears I was mistaken — your brother after all is never wrong.”
Georgiana nodded seriously, as though she agreed that Darcy was always right. It was really sweet the way she looked up to him.
“Elizabeth,” Darcy said, which brought Elizabeth’s eyes back to his now serious face, he held her eyes and said with an intent deep voice, “I have never seen you to act foolishly, but quite the opposite, every time you have hesitated or shown fear it was reasonable and I think — angelic.”
Elizabeth felt happy relief, she already knew from his letters that he did not think poorly of her for her refusal and the manner of it; but to hear it confirmed in his own voice meant more. Elizabeth nodded, “Thank you — Oh! That was an allusion to Pope’s line, ‘fools rush in where angels fear to tread.’”
Darcy indicated assent.
A wide fond smile spread over Elizabeth’s face, “I used that line the first time we met, in this very room, twenty feet from this very spot.” Elizabeth pointed to where they had spoken with Mr. Long the previous October.
Darcy nodded agreement, eyes bright and pleased, “You did.”
“And you remembered!”
“Yes, I even took your advice and refrained from borrowing money to undertake major improvements to the estate.”
Her smile was too wide to allow Elizabeth to laugh, and she watched as Georgiana exclaimed in confusion, “You never planned to borrow for improvements, you’ve said for years it would be foolish!”
Elizabeth touched Georgiana’s arm and leaned close to her with bright smile, “I fear I must repay Darcy’s proof I am without flaw by revealing to you that, while he always tells the truth, he occasionally makes statements he does not believe for the sake of seeing how others will respond.”
Georgiana smiled back, “Oh! He sometimes does that to me to.”
In a few minutes more they had all begun to dance, Georgiana with Colonel Foster — Elizabeth and Bingley had arranged for several married gentleman to ask Georgiana to dance should she come to the ball, so Darcy’s sister would not lack appropriate partners.
Elizabeth, of course, danced with Darcy. But her feelings were in too much of a flutter for her to speak. It was silly, it was girlish, but that Darcy remembered the line she’d teased him with the first night they met made her feel as though she were made of a happy melted pudding. The silly grin stayed on her face as she kept her eyes on Darcy’s pleased features, and it widened each time she thrilled at the touch of their hands. Each time the dance had them twirl around her stomach leapt when she met Darcy’s eyes again.
Darcy took the effort to speak, “I hope to meet your aunt and uncle. Will they be in Hertfordshire for the wedding?”
It was a compliment to her. It was a further sign of his continued interest. It showed the change in his treatment of social inferiors that he had promised three months ago had not been forgotten while they were apart. He wished to know her relatives in trade.
With pleased rosy cheeks Elizabeth replied, “They will be here, though only for a few days as my uncle wishes to set his business in order so he can take an extended trip to the Lakes District this summer. They look forward to meeting you as well, as I have spoken to them about you at length.” Elizabeth blushed to a stop here, as she wondered what Darcy might think she had said to her aunt and uncle.
“I am sure you gave a full depiction of all my flaws, and they will expect an arrogant, demanding, superior man. But I will disappoint them. I have committed myself to show the patience of Job, and the easiness of — Bingley.”
Elizabeth laughed, “You may aspire to the patience of Job, but Bingley’s easiness —” she shook her head. “No, that would be too much. You would hardly be Darcy if you had that. Perhaps you should merely strive to be a very little easier, and then you will disappoint those who expect to think poorly of you, but not disconcert those who like you.”
“I will be guided by you in this. Your aunt and uncle, will they travel through Derbyshire on their journey to the Lakes?”
“They will — in fact they will come very close to your Pemberley, my aunt — during that lengthy description of your flaws you imagined me to give — said she was a girl in Lambton which is but five miles from Pemberley. They plan to stay there for at least a week during their journey.”
“I must ask them to stay with me at Pemberley for at least some of that time.”
Elizabeth blushed at the compliment, “My aunt would enjoy that greatly.”
“Then it is settled.”
Sadly the dance finished far too quickly, and Elizabeth was handed off to Bingley, while Darcy danced with his sister. Elizabeth had an absent happy smile as she walked through the steps without thought. Her mind was too full of Darcy to think on anything else. Bingley startled her out of her absorption when he used his name.
When Elizabeth begged him to repeat his words, Bingley laughed and gave a teasing smile, “I daresay you and Darcy are as much friends as you ever have been.”
Elizabeth colored, and Bingley spoke again, “And what might you have talked about so intently, that it still absorbs you ten minutes later?”
At this Elizabeth’s eyes brightened, “In fact we spoke of Darcy’s intention to model his future behavior upon you.”
Bingley’s amazed expression made Elizabeth laugh, “Indeed we did, though to be candid I discouraged him from the attempt. He would hardly be Darcy if he was as easy in company as you are.”
Now Bingley laughed, “Ha! I daresay he would be remarkably improved with my manners. In fact, from what I have seen of his behavior tonight — that is after you arrived, before he was as Darcy as ever, why he stood there quite like a stiff statue — almost as if he were nervous. He is Darcy, though. So it was merely the seeming of nervousness. But after you arrived, he has been quite as easy as I have ever seen. I wish I could say my manners had at last rubbed on to him, but I believe the truth is very different.”
The dance with Bingley left Elizabeth with a smile — she liked her future brother a great deal. After she drank a glass of punch, Elizabeth entered the floor with her next partner. It was a delightful party, and she always was aware of Darcy’s place in the room. After his sister, he danced with Charlotte. This, like everything else, spoke to Elizabeth further of Darcy’s merit and attachment. During Darcy’s first trip to Hertfordshire Elizabeth was the only local woman Darcy regularly chose to dance with, and Jane was the only other he had danced with ever. Now though he chose to dance with all Elizabeth’s sisters, and her friends. It showed a desire to be friendly, a greater concern for the feelings of those around him, and a desire to make himself agreeable to those she cared for.
When her dance with Mr. Darcy finished Charlotte approached Elizabeth and exclaimed in a pleased manner, “Eliza, I like your Mr. Darcy very much indeed. You must have me to visit.”
Charlotte laughed at Elizabeth’s stammered reply, “He is not my Mr. Darcy.” At Charlotte’s knowing look Elizabeth added with a bright blush, “Yet.”
Elizabeth and Darcy danced a second time; a dance filled with happy conversation about nothings that felt like everything.
When Elizabeth had a brief minute alone she felt as though she would burst with good feelings, she felt as though a dozen happy kittens wrestled inside her stomach. She had never been so happy. So this is what it was to be in love. This was how it felt. No wonder Jane had smiled without break for the past three months. Elizabeth had never enjoyed a ball so much; this is what a ball ought to be: violins, sore feet, a hot room, and a girl in love for the first time.
As Elizabeth sat out the second to last set of the evening she felt almost concerned as she watched Georgiana and Lydia. They had now sat out two full sets to speak to each other. Elizabeth approached the two, but Lydia motioned her away. Darcy was nearby and Elizabeth walked to him, “I wonder what they are so intent about.”
Darcy shrugged in a manner that showed his pleasure, “I do
not know either, however Georgiana rarely speaks so much. She is shy in company, and has few friends her own age. It is good to see Miss Lydia draw her out. Besides your sister is a very good sort of girl — I know she is odd and somewhat improper, but she is solid.”
“I am proud of her,” Elizabeth said, “over the past four years I have raised her more than my mother.”
Elizabeth felt sad at the memory of why. And for second she saw Lydia there with Mr. Collins again, she was startled out of the memory when Darcy’s hand darted forward and grabbed hers. She looked at his face, and his manner showed he was as surprised by his forwardness as she was. Elizabeth squeezed his hand back and smiled at him. Darcy stepped so close to her, as they turned to look at Lydia and Georgiana, that their shoulders brushed each other, and Elizabeth was really sensible of Darcy’s presence, and the feel of his coat’s wool fabric against the bit of bare skin between her glove and the sleeve of her dress.
They stood together silently for several minutes as the current set ended and the musicians prepared to start the last of the night. Darcy inclined his head so close to her ear that the warm air from his breath made her shiver, “Would you dance the last with me.”
This would be their third dance. From a man like Darcy that was as good as a declaration. Elizabeth’s stomach tightened. If she nodded it would be as good as a promise to accept him. She froze for a long moment and in a panic, scared he would misinterpret her inaction as refusal, vigorously nodded, “I very much wish to dance it with you.”
Darcy took her hand and brought it softly to his lips. Elizabeth shivered at the sensation. Then he led her to the line of couples. Elizabeth’s nerves were tight, and she looked up to see Jane and Bingley glow at each other. As the music started she slowly relaxed, and soon the mild glow from the wine she had drunk earlier made every moment seem more intense as Elizabeth boldly kept her eyes on Darcy and felt herself thrill and tighten with every touch of their hands, and every spin of the dance. Darcy’s eyes stayed on her, caressed her.
It ended far too soon. Elizabeth thought longingly as the final passage of the dance played through. She wished they could keep dancing forever: she wished she could meet the morning, and then the noon, and then the next evening in Darcy’s arms. Elizabeth laughed at the silliness of the conceit as Darcy led her from the dance floor.
The happy pair quietly spoke as they waited for the carriages to arrive — they had certainly not spent nearly enough time in conversation. And there were private matters to discuss which they could not speak of in a ballroom. They quickly decided to meet early the next morning for a walk.
The carriage ride home was quiet, Elizabeth had a happy smile but her mind was too full for words, and everyone else was too tired for them. Elizabeth’s spirits were too agitated for her to fall asleep, and when she slipped into bed she lay there nearly an hour as her mind turned over each moment, image, and incident from the ball.
* * * * *
Georgiana had a pleased expression in the carriage, and Darcy roused himself from his thoughts of Elizabeth to ask how she enjoyed the ball.
“Oh, very much indeed. Lydia is such a spirited forward girl, I very much enjoyed meeting her. I rather wish I was as confident as she is.”
Bingley spoke from his side of the carriage, “I had believed young girls were supposed to enjoy the dances at a ball, and not the company of other girls.”
“Well, except you and Fitzwilliam,” at this Georgiana briefly squeezed Darcy’s arm, “my partners were mostly old. Oh, I know why you introduced me to such, and do not mind; besides Lydia was so interesting, and her conversation was very informative.”
“Just what did you two talk about?” Darcy asked.
Georgiana looked sidelong at him, “mostly you.”
“Oh.”
“Oh yes, she was most curious about your behavior, in what manner you behave at home, and she had many other questions. We also did talk about Mrs. Elizabeth, I asked her to say more of her sister. Oh, I liked Mrs. Elizabeth very much indeed. She is very amusing, and kind. When she sought me out during a break in the dancing she quickly put me at my ease.”
“I was pleased when I saw you two speak.”
Georgiana nodded, “Lydia said she is always like that, very clever and kind.” Georgiana looked at Bingley, “I also like Miss Bennet very much. She’s really sweet. I look forward to knowing all of the Bennets better.”
Chapter 15
The next morning Darcy woke early, and walked towards the place where he would meet Elizabeth. It was a pretty spring morning, slightly overcast but with some sunshine. There was a profusion of rapidly growing green, the path was bordered with weeds and wildflowers, the new grasses made a sea of green speckled with flowers in the meadows. Spring was always a happy season, and Darcy hoped a mated pair of birds he saw swooping circles round each other was a good omen.
It was too early to speak of marriage again. Elizabeth had tensed when he asked her to the third dance last night. While Darcy thought she would accept him if he spoke this morning, he did not believe she was completely ready. He wanted her to never feel uncomfortable due to him again. There was time, he had no hurry, he had arranged matters at Pemberley so he could be gone for many months, and Bingley would happily allow Darcy to stay at Netherfield as long as he needed.
Beyond his concern for Elizabeth, there was just a bit of doubt. Darcy remembered Elizabeth’s wide scared eyes when he proposed to her. She would not have acted as she had to the previous night if she did not mean to accept him, but what if, when the moment came, she could not bring herself to do it? Darcy was scared. He would not let it control his behavior, but it added weight to his knowledge that he should not push Elizabeth.
He would court Elizabeth. He would show, without directly speaking, his love and concern for her. He would show how he had changed in response to her reproofs, he would reveal more of his character, and he would do everything he could to make Elizabeth more comfortable with him.
Darcy soon saw Elizabeth’s neat figure walk towards him on the road, the light wind billowing her dress around her legs. She saw him and beamed. Darcy smiled in return, and the brightness of her expression blinded him to all else for a minute, he felt on seeing her as though he’d entered a brightly lit building after wandering in the dark.
When they met neither spoke for a minute, Darcy’s eyes stayed on her, her delicate eyebrows, her red enticing lips, and the bold way her radiant eyes studied him in turn. Elizabeth blushed, laughed, and curtsied at last. She said, “I am so very happy to see you this morning.”
Darcy bowed, offered Elizabeth his arm, and said “I am very pleased to see you as well — in fact there is nothing I could want more.” Then he added, “You look particularly well this morning.”
She laughed, “That is kind of you to say, though I received hardly any sleep and I’m sure my eyes show it — you look particularly fetching yourself in that green coat.”
Elizabeth nestled close to Darcy holding his arm tightly, and Darcy found it difficult to think, his mind was too full of the look of her hand in its blue glove, her face in profile framed by the lace edges of her bonnet, and the happy expression which showed his company pleased her.
“I must thank you for the messages you sent me in your letters to Bingley. They — I loved to read them very much.” Elizabeth’s eyes were bright and pretty.
“I am glad for that. Very glad.” Darcy laughed, “It was deuced odd though to communicate through him in that manner.”
“I know.” Elizabeth laughed merrily, “Though Bingley gave me to understand he enjoyed the experience greatly. Even though it made him write somewhat more than was his usual.”
“I never before had any idea Bingley could be a prompt correspondent. Or that his letters might become legible.”
“I believe Jane stood over him as he wrote them.”
“I suspected as much. There were some corrections in her hand.”
The two fell silent as Darcy h
elped Elizabeth over a stile so they could walk towards a hill Elizabeth had pointed to on the far edge of a field they walked past. Darcy had decided to tell Elizabeth how he first met Bingley, when she began to speak.
She swallowed, and looked at him with anxious eyes and began in a halting voice, “you said how — in your messages you said, you said you looked forward to when we would speak again. I —” Elizabeth’s breaths came fast. “I will say — yes — to anything you wish to ask me.”
Her face was white and stiff, and her eyes wide. There was a distant look in her eyes, which Darcy now recognized as the one she had when her memories were present. Her hand tightly clutched at his arm.
Darcy took her hand, and drew it up to kiss it. He had never loved her so much as right now when she spoke to him despite her fears. He softly caressed her hand. Darcy said, “You are not comfortable. Not yet.”
“That matters not, I wish you to know, I —” her eyes were haunted, and her voice caught. She turned her head away, and tried to pull her hand out of Darcy’s grasp, “I thought I had conquered this feeling.”
Darcy continued to hold her hand, and rub his thumbs over her knuckles. “You shall. I know it. And I know. You need not tell me, I see it in your eyes, and in your smiles. I said I wish us both to be happy when we spoke. You are not happy now. I will not ask until you are. There is no hurry, I will be here as long as you need.”
“But, what if I never am —” she said with fear in her tone.
Darcy placed a finger on Elizabeth’s lips, “Then I’ll be here, with you, when we know that.” He wished he could convey all of the love he felt for her through his voice, “No matter what. Elizabeth, no matter what I will not go anywhere, I will always be here for you.” Intense dark eyes held him, and seemed to pierce through Darcy’s soul. She breathed hard, and nodded.
Elizabeth grabbed one of Darcy’s hands, pulled it to her face, and kissed it. Darcy was caught in an intense rush of emotion, as she held it against her cheek and her breaths calmed. She let go, and gave Darcy a small half smile. Darcy smiled back at her, taking her other arm into his and asked, “Have I told you how I met Bingley?”
Mr Darcy and Mr Collins's Widow Page 15
