by Octavia Kore
And I’m being told to risk it all. I close my eyes for a moment and let her face appear in my mind. She is just as alien to me as I am to her. I would never wish to hurt her, not even before I knew who she was to us. If I do as the green aliens demand, I would not only hurt Xia, I would hurt my brother, and I would hurt our kit. The same kit I was so desperate to keep safe in the first place.
I can feel the pull to my mate slide along the bond already and my anxiety rises. I have no idea how I am going to keep her safe. I’m terrified to love her and I’m terrified of not loving her. A mate is supposed to be a gift, something to be cherished, and while Aquilian fawns over her I am trying my best to put distance between us. Not because I do not want her, Sun Father knows I do, but because I cannot live with the thought that I may hurt her.
Pulling myself onto the limbs, I climb until I reach the branch that holds the fruit. Plucking a quill from my head, I shoot one at the hanging orbs, successfully dropping a couple. It is a mindless task, one that clears his mind.
From my spot in the tree, I can just make out a nolfira nest. The members of its family clan snap at one another restlessly as they nudge their pups around. The sleek white animals have long pointed ears and big innocent eyes. They are extremely loyal to one another, usually only fighting among themselves for dominance. The best thing to do right now is to ignore them. I descend quickly from the tree and gather the fruit that has fallen to the forest floor before I head back toward our temporary den. It is getting late and my mate is sure to be hungry if she has not eaten the ojoo. Later I will finish my inspection of this prison we are stuck in.
Chapter 7
Inoxia
While eating and drinking is great, I could really use a bathroom right about now. I’ve been holding it for a little while, not really sure how to ask about the facilities and it’s getting harder and harder. Each time they let the water from the faucet run I feel like my bladder is going to explode. It isn’t like I can just go outside with the tree sealing itself back up and I have no idea how they even open it in the first place. Kareen walks up beside me, fisting my skirts and tugging to get my attention. Looking down at her I notice that she has her legs crossed and is hopping from foot to foot.
“I need to go,” she whispers, glancing sideways at the aliens who are busy in the kitchen area of the tree.
“Fuck.”
“Did you say fuck?” she looks around as if she is going to be caught using the word before turning those big blue eyes on me. “That’s a bad word, miss Xia.”
“You know what, you’re right. I’m sorry I said that.” Goddamnit. I’m not used to being around children in stressful situations. Normally, I don’t have much interaction with the younger kids outside of their visits to our greenhouse, which is where I am most comfortable and calm. I debate on which man I should ask for help, Ettrian or Aquilian? Looking over at their backs, the answer is clear… Aquilian is way easier to talk to. Well, to try to talk to, since we still don’t understand one another yet. My teeth bite into my lower lip as I softly lay a hand on his shoulder. He turns to me, his eyes flashing with color so fast I’m not even sure which one it was. “Um, we need the bathroom.”
His head tilts in the universal sign of “what the fuck did you just say” and I worry that I am not going to be able to get my point across before Kareen and I pee our pants. Hopping from one foot to the other, much like Kareen, I move my hands between my legs and clutch myself. Hoping beyond all hope that they too need to relieve themselves somewhere. This only seems to confuse him further. So, with burning cheeks, I squat down and flick my fingers as if there is something coming out of me. Light seems to dawn on him and he looks horrified. Turning his face from me he holds out a hand, as if afraid to even look my way. Reaching forward I take his hand and nod my head at Kareen.
“Come on, let’s follow him.” The sound of her feet racing across the floor has him looking back at her in a perplexed manner, like he isn’t sure about my decision to bring her along. “She needs to pee too.”
Aquilian gives a very human-like shrug and pulls us deeper into the tree which seems to be reforming itself as we walk. A new room appears to our right and he leads me inside. There is a sling in the middle like the one he put Kareen in earlier, only this one has holes in it. Does he expect me to pee in that? The pee would get all over me and the floor! The male sits me in it, grabbing my hips to place me just right, and then pulls my dress up. I want to push his hands away, but maybe there is something special I don’t know about, and if I don’t pee soon there will be a mess. But instead of doing anything further he crouches down and mimes for me to remove my underwear. I’ve never really been shy about nudity, but that is just plain weird.
“Um, no. I’ve got this.” I say, but he only crouches and tries to peek beneath my skirts as he holds his hands out like he’s getting ready to catch something. What. The. Actual. Fuck.
“Miss Xia?”
“Not right now, Kareen. Aquilian and I are trying to figure this out.”
“I don’t have to pee anymore.”
“What?” My head snaps in her direction at her words and I notice a little puddle at her feet. Oh no, nonononononono. How do moms deal with this stuff?
Aquilian looks over and I think he finally understands what I’ve been trying to say. A rattle works its way through his quills and his eyes change to a sickening yellow. Kareen looks like she’s about to cry, but Aquilian, ever her hero, walks over and runs his hand through her hair. He motions for both of us to follow him once more, his head hung slightly. The puddle disappears right before my eyes, getting absorbed into the tree. I sure hope that doesn’t get recycled into our drinking water. The next room he brings us to is quite obviously what we needed. There is a small bowl that I assume is used for waste and a large basin that I am hoping is where we can take a proper bath. Over the large basin is a nozzle much like the one in the kitchen.
Aqulian reaches out his hand, running it along the stem to make the water flow and stands with Kareen as they watch it begin to fill up. The sound of rushing water does me in. Since their backs are to me, I hike up my skirt, shove down my panties, and relieve myself in the bowl. The alien either doesn’t seem to hear me going, or he respects my privacy because he keeps his back to me. Poor Kareen still stands beside him waiting to be helped. Once I’ve finished I move over to them both to see that a decent amount of water has collected. Aquilian strokes the stem and the water comes to a stop.
He moves across the room, reaching into the tree to pull out two pods. Pretending to run one over his quills and the other he rubs over his body, Aquilian says something in my mind, like he’s telling me this is what these things are for. Handing them both to me, he leaves the room. Ok, so no towel? But just as I am worrying about what Kareen can wear now that her clothing is soiled, he comes in with a soft length of something that looks similar to silk but feels far more absorbent. I take it from him without a second thought and shoo him from the room. With a little bit of work, Kareen and I figure out this whole bathing a kid business. When she is finished I fashion her a makeshift dress as best as I can out of the silky material, wrapping it around her before taking her clothes and throwing them all into the tub.
“Sorry sweetie, you’re going to have to use that until I can get your clothes dry,” I tell her, washing them by hand and wringing the water from them. Once I am positive I have gotten them as clean as I can, I hang them over the side of the basin. I’d love to bathe, but it looks like I’ll have to wait a bit. Ushering Kareen from the room I lead her through the kitchen and into our makeshift bedroom.
“Come on you, let’s get you into bed.” A sigh falls from my lips as I ruffle her hair. “You didn’t get much sleep earlier.”
“I was worried.” Her hand tucks a ringlet behind her ear.
“Worried about what, honey?” The moment reminds me of my mom who always listened when I was upset, and it causes a pang of sadness to ring through me. I miss her so much and I’m
sure she would know exactly what to do right now.
“We’re never going to get back home, are we?” Her little lip trembles and again, I fear that I am woefully under-qualified to handle this parenting thing.
“Baby, it’s okay. We’ve got this. I need you to keep being brave for me.”
“Brave for you?” Her little eyebrows come together as she frowns.
“Well of course! How am I supposed to deal with those knuckleheads out there if I don’t have you to help me?”
“Aren’t adults supposed to be the brave ones?”
“Oh, sweet girl, anyone of any age can be brave and you’ve been doing it so well today!”
The look of pride that spreads across her face makes my heart flutter. Maybe I’m not so bad at this after all. Her eyes light up with pleasure and before I know it she is wrapping her arms around my waist in a pint-sized bear hug.
“Thank you, Xia,” she whispers, “you’re the best mama ever.”
Tears threaten to spill from my eyes as I pick her up and tuck her into her little cocoon, pressing my lips to the top of her head.
“Get some rest, Kareen.” My voice only cracks a little with emotion.
Back in the kitchen, I find both males standing at opposite ends of the long counter. They look up at me as I come in and Aquilian holds out another length of silk. Excitement warms me to my toes.
“Oh my goodness. Yes! Thank you!” Snatching it from his hands, I take off running to the bathroom. Nothing else in that moment matters as much as having the chance to feel clean. I grab Kareen’s wet clothes and look around the bathroom for somewhere to put them. Ettrian takes them from my hands before disappearing through the doorway, but Aquilian stands just inside, waiting expectantly.
“Soap?” I mime washing myself the way he did earlier.
He opens his palms to show me that he has already thought of that and even the tub is already full of fresh water. Well okay. I try to take it from his hand, but he closes his palm over the little treasure and takes a step back.
“Aquilian, I’m really not in the mood for a game. We’ve already played an unsuccessful round of charades and I just want a bath.”
More of his growly mindspeak fills my head as he begins to nudge me toward the water.
“My dress is still on!” He seems to have already thought of that too because he is attempting to figure out how to get the garment off. “Okay, no!”
Turning on my heel I push at his body until he is standing in the hallway. I know that I am only able to move him because he allows it, but still, I feel triumphant. I hold my hand out once again, curling my fingers in a gimme-motion. With great reluctance, Aquilian hands over the soaps and leaves without so much as a growl when I point toward the kitchen. Finally! I get through washing my body, scrubbing the dirt and sweat away, and halfway through washing my hair before I break down and give in to the tears. I curl my knees up to my chest and wrap my arms around my legs as the sobs take me. I’ve been having to put on a strong face for Kareen ever since waking up on this planet and I just need to recharge with a bit of a pity party.
My soft wails fill the room as I think of possibly never seeing my parents again, never curling up on my couch for movie night with Mina, and never ever getting to work in my greenhouse again. It’s heartbreaking and absolutely terrifying. Life has thrown me a massive curveball and I am suddenly finding myself a mother, or at the very least a temporary one, to a little girl I loved, but who I had basically been told was never going to be mine. I’m on an alien planet where the forest is full of trees that morph into houses, giant bugs are food, and alien men rock heads of colorful glowing quills. No sane person should be expected to take all of that in stride for this long.
A gentle hand lands on my shoulder, making me jump and jerk my head up. Ettrian is crouched down outside the basin, his face full of concern as he looks at me.
“I’m okay.” I hiccup.
His hand curls under my chin and tilts my face up so that he is looking directly into my eyes. The soft growls play through my mind just before he brings his forehead down to rest against mine. Unlike the last couple times he’s touched me, I don’t feel the pull of arousal. This is only meant to soothe me, to bring comfort. His other hand rubs over my still soapy hair and the softest rattle comes from his quills as he rubs his face against mine. It is the strangest and oddly sweetest thing anyone has done for me in a long time.
Trent never did stuff like this. He never cared when I was sad or upset. All Trent had cared about was himself and his needs. He’d shamelessly cheated on me, brought women home to guilt me into threesomes, and berated me anytime I went against what he wanted. Ettrian and Aquilian have been far more considerate of my wants and needs than the man I had once loved ever had.
A broken sigh falls from my lips as I take a moment to lean into the comfort he is offering. Alright, Xia, you’ve had your cry. Time to get it together. Pulling my head back gently, I give him a brave smile which sends him stumbling backward. Right, aliens are so strange. I wave my hand at him “Shoo shoo. I need to rinse and that doesn’t require an audience. I’ve already had to kick Aquilian out.” I know he doesn’t completely understand me, but he inclines his head and leaves me to it.
Chapter 8
Aquilian
The rammit shoots to the right into the underbrush just as the quill leaves my hand, sailing through the space between us and embedding itself in the ground where my prey had just been. Sun Father curse it! My breath huffs out of my mouth as I snarl in irritation. I don’t think I’ve missed a rammit since I was a kit just learning the skill from my papas. I run my fingers through my quills in frustration, just barely stopping myself from tugging any out.
I may not know how to be a great mate yet, but I’ve never failed at hunting. Until today. Apparently this is a day of firsts. I grab the quill I’d thrown and stalk off toward the tree where Ettrian and I have decided to keep the females until we can figure out how to get out of here. The only thing I have gotten for food are fruits and some root vegetables I can remember my mama making. Maybe Xia will like those more than the ojoo, although I’m pretty positive she likes nearly anything more than the ojoo.
My mind drifts to Xia as I walk and I cannot help the embarrassment that seeps into my very soul. I had thought she was telling me she was giving birth. Shocked, I had naturally set about preparing to help her whelp her newest kit. I wanted to bang my head on the nearest hard surface at the memory of her confused face as I had crouched down in front of her. Stupid, stupid, stupid. It had taken poor Kareen soiling herself before it had dawned on me that they needed to relieve themselves. When I tried to be a proper mate and take care of Xia by bathing her, she had ushered me from the room. Can you blame her? I was obviously stupid enough to mistake her needing to relieve herself for her giving birth. I close my eyes and take deep, calming breaths, reminding myself that I have no experience with these things, but that does not ease the shame that has wiggled its way into my mind.
“He’s a Darkborn twin, you cannot expect good things from him.”
“He will never be worthy.”
My throat tightens as I replay the words of my tribe. I want to be worthy of this female. She may not be what the Dauur considers beautiful, but I want her to have everything she deserves and I will do anything it takes to provide that.
A few days pass in much the same fashion with both females staying safely tucked inside the tree. They may be safe, but the kit has begun to practically bounce off of the walls. She makes the sharpest vibrations when she is upset and even her mama seems to be floundering in her attempts to calm her. I had not thought much of her outburst until my sweet little Kareen lobs a woven basket at the side of my head. Perhaps it is just my inexperience with young ones, but how can this be the same kit who snuggles up to me before bed, the same kit who runs her tiny fingers through my quills while she vibrates at me?
Ettrian has shown me bits and pieces of what happened when he was captured, but
I know in my heart that he is keeping secrets. There is something weighing heavily on his mind that he is not ready to share. The thought that these creatures may try to take Xia and Kareen sends a protective surge through me. I know the females do not like being kept inside, but the image of them in the hands of those monsters is more than I can bear. I would rather die than see any harm come to them.
Glowing liquid drips down Inoxia’s chin as she devours the fruit Ettrian and I gathered for her. I have the overwhelming urge to lick it from her skin, but I turn away, afraid she will see the desire in my eyes and reject me. Pushing up from where I have settled down on the floor I hold my hand out to our kit.
“Time to sleep, my little Kareen. Let us give your mama a break.” Kareen bares her teeth at me, but I hold my ground. I am the one in charge. I gently tug her up into my arms as she waves at Xia and take her down the hall into the sleeping quarters she shares with her mama. The fact that she only allows me to do this routine with her gives me a great amount of joy. The last time Ettrian tried she fussed until I relieved him. I think she can also tell he is hiding something and behaving unlike himself.
“Sleep little one,” I tell her as I tuck her into the sling, hoping that soon the bond will allow us to understand one another. Both she and her mama seem to pick up words here and there, and while it is not uncommon for the bond to teach a female the language of her mates, I do worry that it will not be extended to her kit.
When I leave the room in search of my brother I do not find him with Xia where I expected him to be. She points to the room we have taken for ourselves when I say his name and I make my way to him.
“Ettrian?” He is sitting quietly in his sling, his eyes are distant and he looks like he might fall over any moment. My quills rustle as I step closer.
