by Kay Lyons
It may have taken him a while to get his head on straight but now that he had, he wouldn’t make the same mistake twice.
* * *
ALEX STARED AT THE PATHETIC-looking, spindly tree and knew it was perfect. With its drooping branches, miniature stature and total lack of fluffy big tree appeal, it suited her mood perfectly.
“You cannot be serious.”
Shelby made the statement as she walked up to stand behind Alex where she stared at the wannabe tree.
“That one?”
“Yup.” Alex turned to search the thinning line of evergreens for her nephew Matt. Since coming home, she and Shelby had had a long talk in Shelby’s kitchen and made up after their fight about Luke. Having her best friend married to her brother would require more getting used to than she’d thought, but they’d work it out fine. “It’s the right size.”
“It’s half-dead.”
A wry smile curled her lips. “Maybe it’s just waiting for the right person to come along.” She lifted her hand when she spotted Matt. The boy came running. Dressed in his Boy Scout uniform, Matt and his other troop members were holding the tree sale to help fund future field trips. “How much, kiddo?”
Matt’s eyebrows disappeared beneath his bangs and a stupefied expression marked his cold-reddened cheeks. “Dad said that one was gonna be recycled. It’s the top somebody cut out of a tree they bought because it wouldn’t fit in their house.”
Not a good fit, huh? Could it be any more appropriate? She and that tree were destined to spend Christmas together. “Here’s a donation then,” she said, pressing a twenty into Matt’s pocket. “I’ll carry it home.”
Home. That sounded so strange. But after getting up out of that bed in Mexico a couple weeks ago and booking a flight to Tennessee, she’d stopped by David’s office and turned in her notice. He’d been shocked to say the least. She’d always sworn she’d never give up her dream job, but standing here beside Shelby and Matt and looking at that sad little tree she didn’t have a single regret.
She’d rented her brother Nick’s old apartment above the gym, rented a storefront in the building her businessman brother had just purchased and planned to open her own photography studio January 3—if she could get the work done on time. She’d sunk most of her savings into renting both places and buying equipment and props, so the much-needed painting and cleaning had to be all hands-on.
Photographing kids and pets and weddings wouldn’t be as exciting as traveling the world and capturing wolves in action, but that was okay. She was ready for the next stage of her life.
The grown-up stage.
“Sure you don’t want me and Luke to drop you off?”
She shook her head at Shelby’s query. “Thanks anyway, but I want to walk by the studio again.”
“It hasn’t changed since you left it an hour ago,” Shelby teased.
“I know, but I forgot to measure the window and I want to put up white lights after I get the painting done.” She gave Shelby a hug. “I’ll be working on it all day tomorrow but I’ll see you for the ultrasound.”
Alex took her time on the walk home. The sun had set a half hour ago, and the air was crisp and cold, with the tiniest of snowflakes drifting down from the sky. No accumulation was expected but it definitely made for a pretty sight amongst the colorful Christmas lights and displays gracing the mostly empty streets.
That would take some getting used to. All the shops closed at six when she was used to having twenty-four-hour availability in the touristy towns where she traveled.
Carrying her three-foot twig beneath the ornamented streetlights, Alex took the longer route down Main Street and window-shopped as she made her way back to her apartment via the studio. Rounding the corner off Main, she came upon the building. Squeezed in between two larger ones, it had once been a mom-and-pop grocery, then an attorney’s office, then a small clothing store. Quaint and cute, it was full of potential with lots of decorative trim and old-fashioned appeal.
Alex stood and pictured the exterior painted a deep red, the entry door a glossy ebony, and black-and-white portraits on display in the window and hanging from the ceiling.
She did a quick guestimate of the size, figuring four boxes of white lights would do. It was perfect, it would be perfect. Heck, she might even get a dog. A big cream-colored Lab or Doodle that would keep her company, was good with kids and didn’t mind wearing a bow or a bonnet every now and again.
Smiling at the thought, she stepped off the curb and crossed the street, her thoughts focused entirely on her new venture and getting through Christmas with her family when she kept catching them staring at her with pity in their eyes.
That was the thing with family. She didn’t have to say a word but they knew how she felt. And since she had confided to Shelby about falling in love with Dylan, it didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out Shelby had given enough information to the rest of them that they’d filled in the blanks. They were giving her space for now but she knew her reprieve wouldn’t last long.
Alex approached her apartment from the rear, her head down as she dodged slippery puddles and contemplated some sarcastic comebacks for her brothers when they inevitably pulled her aside and talked about beating Dylan up for breaking her heart.
Almost at the stairs, Alex gasped when she saw a man step out of the shadows.
Alex jumped back, clutching the bit of pine to her chest like a droopy little shield. Then she realized who it was.
“I didn’t mean to startle you,” Dylan said, raising his hands as though to smooth over the fright he’d given her.
She blinked, hardly daring to believe her eyes. Barely daring to breathe in case he disappeared. He looked so different, his beard gone. “You’re here?”
“I couldn’t stay away. Colt and I are both here,” he said, tilting his head toward the car parked in the alley. “We came for the woman we both love.”
He loved her. They both loved her. So much Dylan had braved the crowds and airports and come all the way from Alaska without his beard?
She knew what it meant. He wasn’t hiding. Not anymore. Dylan had shown the world his face, stepped out of his prison.
For her. Because he loved her.
Alex tossed the tree aside and flew toward him, launching herself at Dylan and catching a glimpse of his smile before he wrapped his arms around her and lifted her off her feet, burying his face in her hair.
He was here. They would work their problems and issues out later. But he was here.
And that was all that mattered.
Chapter 21
DYLAN OPENED HIS EYES and from behind the veil of Alexandra’s hair he saw the streetlights at the end of the alley. The light at the end of the tunnel?
He was so tired. Tired of hiding, tired from the long trip and the nerves he’d experienced wondering if someone would recognize him, what he’d say if they did.
But no one had. And now he was with Alexandra. He wanted time to stand still.
“I love you, too,” she whispered, kissing his cheek, his mouth, pressing her lips to his. “I missed you so much. I can’t believe you’re here. And your beard is gone, I like it gone. You look hot,” she said with a teasing grin, “and you’re here,” she repeated again, as though she couldn’t quite believe it.
In a way he couldn’t quite wrap his mind around it, either. After two years of hiding, it felt strange to be so exposed. “Don’t ever walk out like that again,” he ordered, his voice husky because he’d come so close to losing her forever.
There was a scuffle from within the rental car parked behind him. He would have liked more time to talk to Alexandra alone before Colt woke up from his travel-induced nap but one of the doors swung open wide.
Dylan set her on her feet and they both turned to face the car.
“Alex!”
Dylan heard Alexandra’s sharp gasp. Her mouth dropped open in shocked surprise before she caught Colt to her, hugging him and kissing him, her laughter filling th
e air.
“You’re talking?” Alexandra eased Colt away and palmed his face. “Oh, sweetie, say my name again. Please?”
“Alex,” Colt whispered shyly. He lifted his hands and showed her the horse she’d bought for him. “Can we see Bandit?”
Another beautiful, happy laugh bubbled from her, a laugh he’d missed more than he’d ever thought possible. “Colt missed you,” he said, wrapping his arm around her. “We both did.”
Her expression was soft, more than a little dazed. He could tell she was surprised. But did she want them there? Was it too much to show up like this after weeks of silence?
“How did you find me?”
He couldn’t help but smile at that. It was funny how life worked sometimes. “The address on the packet you sent. I didn’t see the apartment at first so I stopped in the gym to ask about you and the woman assumed I was asking about having Colt’s picture taken.”
Alexandra flashed a smile similar to the one she’d worn when she’d caught the fish. “Did that surprise you?”
Considering how she’d talked about traveling to get away from her family, yes. He wasn’t sure what he felt about her putting down firm roots in a town he’d never heard of before meeting her but considering the size, maybe it would work.
Shaking his head at himself, he sighed. It had to work. “May we come in?”
She hesitated a long moment, a mixture of fear and hope flickering across her face. But without a word she led the way, carting the dying bit of pine with her.
Dylan urged Colt up the stairs, following Alexandra as she unlocked the door and left the tree on the tile by the hall table where she dropped her purse.
Knowing the time had come, Dylan squatted down in front of Colt. “Okay, Colt, this is it. Remember what we talked about on the way here? About how Alexandra and I need to talk about grown-up stuff and how you have to stay put?” He waited until Colt nodded. “I want you to play while Alexandra and I talk, okay? You stay in this room, right here.”
Alexandra looked confused by his insistence with Colt’s whereabouts, but that was a subject to be explained later. And he’d be sure she didn’t think for a second the only reason he’d come was because Colt had run away. He’d braved airports and city traffic to see her, all because he loved her. This wasn’t only for Colt. Now he had to find the words that had been missing for so long.
“How about a movie?” Alexandra walked over to the television. “My nephew left some of his behind when he moved out.”
With efficient movements Alexandra put a DVD into the machine and seconds later Colt was ensnared by Disney magic.
With one last look at his son, Dylan followed her into the kitchen. Where to begin? “I saw the review.”
“I’m sorry.”
“I’m not.”
She blinked at him, visibly confused. “I thought you’d be angry.”
“I was. I was furious—until I remembered I couldn’t throw stones. Even though you knew who I was and had pictures, you didn’t use them.”
“I would never do that.”
“I know that, too.”
She closed her eyes briefly and inhaled. “We’re a pair, aren’t we?”
That they were. But it was nice, too, knowing he wasn’t the only one with rough edges. “I realize given the arrest and suspicion that withholding my identity from you was much more serious than you not revealing your job.”
“We were both wrong, Dylan. We weren’t to that point in our relationship yet and I understand why you didn’t tell me. I admit, I was freaked out because I did remember, but… I get it. You didn’t want that label attached and you knew it would be. What I don’t understand is what changed? Don’t get me wrong, I’m so glad you’re here. But why are you here?”
Dylan tugged her body against his. “Because I wanted to look you in the eyes when I say you’re right, I have been hiding. Thanks to you and Colt, it’s finally sunk in that I don’t want to be the last man in the bubble,” he said drily, trying to smile but not quite managing it. “I don’t want him growing up resenting me and thinking I’m holding him back, or wondering if the rumors are true because of how I act or where I live.”
Her stance relaxed a bit. “Go on.”
He stared into her upturned face, memorizing every feature, thanking God she’d ignored him and got on the Beaver that day. “Alexandra, there’s something else I haven’t told you. I haven’t told anyone, not even Zeke. But I’m here, and I want you, but you need to know what we could be up against and…why I felt the need to hide.”
* * *
SEEING THE LOOK ON HIS FACE and hearing the tone that he used, Alexandra’s heart began to beat too fast. “What do you mean?”
“You’ve probably read the articles about me on the Internet.”
She’d read them all. Page after page, site after site. It had taken a long time.
“Sweetheart, the man Lauren was with that night—it wasn’t the first time she’d cheated.”
She gripped his coat, appalled by what he was saying. She couldn’t imagine being with Dylan and doing such a thing. Why take vows if you had no intention of keeping them?
Alex felt his pain, his humiliation. She remembered the photograph in the back of his novel, the arrogance. That arrogance was gone now and in its place was a man matured and humbled by life.
“I told you we had problems but Lauren and I stayed together. She got pregnant with Colt, and…everything seemed okay. Then I found out she was cheating on me. And even though she retracted her words later and claimed she’d only said them in anger, she’d once screamed that Colt wasn’t mine.”
Dylan loved Colt as only a father could. Not his? How could he not know for sure? “You haven’t taken a test?” Wouldn’t that be the first step?
“No. I couldn’t risk it. There is always a paper trail, no matter how confidential.”
“You’re afraid someone will find out and bring up his paternity.”
“And take him away,” he added, holding her gaze and nodding slowly. “Regardless of what happened between me and Lauren, I’ve always thought of Colt as my son and I always will. I don’t care if he’s not my flesh and blood, he’s the only good thing to come from that disaster of a marriage.
“If the truth is known, how is he going to feel if his mother’s lovers start coming out of the woodwork?” He swore softly. “After the fire, Colt was all I could think about. He’d lost his mother, his home. I hadn’t loved Lauren the way a man should love his wife. But I loved Colt. I learned what was important. And right or wrong, I know if someone finds out, there are idiots out there who would come forward for their fifteen minutes of fame or a payoff.”
Dylan was right. There was a huge chance of that happening. Sex tapes, DNA tests. Scandal seemed to make the world go round.
“After everything Colt had been through, I couldn’t put him through that. And I couldn’t risk losing him. When I sat in that jail cell and everyone was going nuts plotting out how I’d allegedly murdered her, I decided that no matter what Lauren had done, Colt was mine. I was going to be the father he needed. But as you so accurately pointed out, I haven’t done a good job of that.”
“You’ve done a wonderful job. Despite all he’s been through, Colt is a sweet, caring little boy.” She couldn’t imagine a better father than Dylan.
“Alexandra, sweetheart, I love you. I want to be with you. I have no more secrets.” He trailed his knuckles down her cheek. “But I’m begging you to keep this one. Don’t ever repeat what I’ve told you, for all our sakes.”
The words made her heart sing even as sadness cut deep. Dylan was trying to protect Colt, yes, but Dylan was so very afraid that he didn’t see that not knowing was worse than the actual truth.
She stood on tiptoe and pulled his head low, nuzzling against him, pressing a soft kiss on his lips meant to comfort and support. “I love you.” She whispered the words against his mouth. “I love you,” she repeated, lifting her lashes to meet and hold his ga
ze. “Your secrets are my secrets. But, Dylan, you’ve come all this way, and it’ll all be for nothing if you can’t face Colt’s paternity, too.”
Dylan closed his eyes, pain etched on his face. “What if he’s not mine?”
Such a raw, bare whisper. “He’s ours no matter what the test says. No matter what it says, we’ll face it together because neither one of us is alone anymore. We have each other. We love each other. Don’t you want to know? Don’t you want to be prepared and build your defenses if the day comes that it’s questioned?”
Silence.
Alex watched as Dylan looked away, withdrawing from her even as his hands pulled her closer to him. She waited, she prayed. But Dylan didn’t speak.
Alex fingered the hair at his collar. “As a writer it’s all too easy to think of all the scenarios, but what about Colt’s feelings in this? What about having that knowledge ahead of time if a medical issue comes up? God forbid it happen, but if that day came and Colt found out you’ve known all this time… Even though you’re the best father he could ever have, he would feel betrayed.”
“I don’t want anyone to know. It’s too risky.”
For a lot of reasons he’d just stated, that was true. But… “I can help you.”
“How?”
She raked her nails lightly over the softness of his face, amazed at the heat that unfurled within her from the feel of his skin. “My father’s a doctor. He could perform a DNA test for you. He can take the samples so we’d know it’s accurate. No one would ever know but us.”
“And him. That’s not the way to impress the father of the woman I want to marry.”
She was debating kissing him again and how out of hand it could get with Colt so near when Dylan said the words, but she froze as they sank in. “Marry?”
“You said you love me. Will you have me? Marry me?”
Marriage? She could only imagine her family’s response to the suddenness of it. “We’ve almost spent more time apart than we had together.”
“It’s not quantity but quality that counts.”
