Return to Darkness

by Rebecca Royce

  It seemed like with all bullies, Colton’s meanness came from hurt. I approached him and slid into the chair in front of his desk. “I’m not a ghost. And I guess I’m more like the Ghost of Christmas Alternative Reality. But yeah, you should still definitely apologize to Aaron. And Susan. You made her cry.”

  He dragged his hands down his face and met my stare. It took him a moment of studying my face before he reacted. His chair suddenly slammed into the wall behind it as he stood. He strode around the desk, and pulled me out of my chair. One hand went to the back of my neck while the other went around my waist, yanking me against him. His lips crashed down on mine, tongue thrusting past my lips.

  Shock held me still, but that hand holding my neck shook, and I had to respond. I wrapped my arms around him, broke off our kiss and held him tight. “It’s okay.”

  He dipped his forehead to touch my shoulder. “No. It’s not. Nothing is okay. Except that you’re here. It was a mistake, wasn’t it?” He lifted his head. “We buried you, but I knew it wasn’t you. You were too important to die. What happened? Were you blown away in the blast? Did you lose your memory? You remember now though, right? Everything will be okay. I promise.” His blue-eyed gaze was so earnest. So serious.

  I skimmed my hands up his back and then through his hair. Eyes closing, he let out a huge sigh.

  “In the reality I live in, I didn’t die. I was in the house with all of you when the house collapsed. I stopped Erdirg. And then I left.” I’d explained this to both Aaron and Oliver. I would have to do it with Thorn, too. “After ten years, the four of you found me. We’ve all been together, yes like that, ever since. Then Mr. Chee decided he wanted to do better by his kids. He altered the past. And I’m here. I need your help. All of you. To get back. To us.”

  His mouth fell open. “No.”

  I raised my eyebrows. “No?”

  “I don’t want you to go back. Stay here. With me.”

  Well, this was different. “I can’t do that. You have a whole life there that’s different than this one. I think you deserve to have that life. I think we all do. You’re an archeologist.”

  His eyes widened. “That was sort of a secret dream.”

  “One you lived.” He smelled like my Colton. It was nice to see some things hadn’t changed.

  He smoothed my hair off my forehead. “Stay here and fix things here. I mean… I don’t particularly like Aaron and Oliver. Or Thorn for that matter. But I’ll work on that. You can help them fix their lives. Probably too late for the archeologist. But we can watch a lot of Indiana Jones.”

  I snorted, not able to help myself. I had thought about that when I’d heard what he did for a living. “I’m not meant to be here. In this world, I died. Can you help me get back to where I didn’t?”

  He visibly swallowed. “Did I get to have your virginity? In that other world? Did that happen?”

  Rolling my eyes, I shoved at his chest. “Have my virginity? My virginity is not a thing anyone got to have or not have. Talk about misogyny. You’d know better than that in my world. Have my virginity? Are you for real?”

  He pressed his forehead to mine. “And there’s that mouth I fell in love with.” It was hard to be mad at Colton when he said things like that. Even if he wouldn’t dare have said them in our other existence. “So did I?”

  I shook my head. “No”

  “Damn it. Which one of them got it?”

  I let go of him. “None of you, actually. But you get a lot of me now, Colton. In the other world.”

  “That other me is such a lucky bastard.” He sighed. “Yes, I’ll help you, Lacey. Although, I don’t know exactly what I can do. I’m not an archeologist. I run this monster of a company. And make my secretary cry, apparently.”

  I squeezed his arms. “Do better than that.”

  “Where do we go? What do we do?” His blue eyes were so sad. I never wanted to see him like this again. Not with this sadness. Not my Colton.

  I kissed him. Because I had to. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I swore as the pleasure of his kiss moved through me that I would never forget that Colton had this side of him, this place where he could go so dark that he wasn’t himself anymore. I’d do everything in my life to make sure that he never felt this way again.

  Pulling away from me, he sighed. “I fucking hate that I don’t get to keep you. What happens to me? Do I just disappear?” He glanced around the office. “I don’t even know if I care. This isn’t a life. It’s a placeholder.”

  He was ripping out my heart. “You don’t disappear.” I cupped his face. “You’re still you. This version of you isn’t a worse version. Or a better version. It’s just different. It’s like…” God. This wasn’t my forte. They’d always been the ones who were able to explain the metaphysical in a way that made sense. I hoped I could say this right. “It’s like, if I think of myself as a teenager. That girl is still me. I’m still her. But I’m not. She’s inside me. One version of me. Just like whoever I was as a child. Or even a toddler. I didn’t make those versions of myself never happen. I just sort of absorbed them.” I’d probably fucked that up. “Clear as mud?”

  Reaching for my hands, he nodded and smiled. “It actually makes sense. And I can live with it. It’s more the thought of knowing I had this moment with you, and having to live this version of my life with that knowledge that makes me sick.”

  His phone rang, and he ignored it. Then it rang again. And again. He sighed and stepped away. “Hold on. What?” he barked into the phone.

  Poor Susan. That woman should get hazard pay.

  Colton’s eyes widened. “Okay. Let him in.”

  Hanging up the phone, he swallowed hard. “What is it?” I asked.

  There was a knock on the door and right before it opened, he answered me. “Thorn.”

  The man standing at the door stared at me. “I don’t believe it.”

  An interested looking Susan peered over his shoulder. Colton stepped forward, grabbed Thorn’s arm, pulled him inside, and slammed the door.

  I stared at my oldest friend, my gaze traveling over him. “Aaron said you were the football coach. He didn’t tell me you were the entire team.”

  Thorn’s shoulders and arms stretched the limit of his cotton shirt. He was massive, like he worked out seven days a week and then threw a full-grown steer over his shoulder and did squats with it just for funsies.

  “I didn’t believe him.” He strode toward me. His gaze cut to Colton quickly and then away, as if he couldn’t be bothered with his other friend. “But it’s true.”

  “Ta-da.” The weight of so many I’m-not-dead reveals was starting to get to me. I was messing up these guys’ lives, whatever I thought of them, and changing everything. The irony of being the Mr. Chee of this reality wasn’t lost on me.

  He held out his massive arms and wrapped me up tight. His heart pounded a mile a minute under my cheek, and his breath billowed out of his lungs like he’d run a race. “For a guy who’s as fit as you, you shouldn’t be out of breath.” Here came the awkward jokes. “You need to add cardio between your weight days.”

  He snorted and kissed the top of my head. “Holy shit, Lace. Holy shit.” Holding my shoulders, he pushed me away. “You’re here to fuck with everything, aren’t you?”

  That was funny, and I smirked. The Thorn of my now would never say that to me. But the Thorn from high school? The one who had been insecure when he got back about his place in my life? Yeah… he was still in this Thorn.

  “You know me, Thorn. I like to fuck everything up every chance I get.”

  His smile was huge. “I’m never going to understand how this works. Way above my head.”

  “Really?” I lifted an eyebrow. “Because in my reality, you’re totally a rich tech god. But you can handle what I have to do now.” I brushed against him just because I could. “I’ve lost the stones that I need to get back to my timeline. Colton,” I looked over my shoulder. “Can you still break into a house?”

 
He blinked. “Was that something I could do?”

  Okay. Not him.

  There was a knock on the door. Aaron rocked back and forth in the doorway, as if waiting for permission to enter, while Oliver leaned against the wall. Some things were the same. Oliver was a great leaner.

  Oliver lifted his hand. “I can. Break into a house, I mean. I can’t guarantee I won’t get caught. I tend to get caught when I do things. But I could break in.”

  I nodded. “We won’t let you get caught. You have us. We’re a really good team. We beat back a hag—not an old lady—that’s ageist. A creepy nightmare creature. It was really something.” I smiled. I never could have predicted those would be memories I would like.

  “Then what?” Colton asked, still not having moved. “What will you do after you’ve got them?”

  That was a good question, and unfortunately there was really only one answer I could give. “I’m going to ask Mr. Chee. He got me into this mess, and so help me, he’s going to get me out of it.”

  And if he were very lucky, when I got home, I’d keep Oliver from murdering him. Since he wasn’t dead in this reality. It was all incredibly confusing.

  But before I got caught up in the whole is-he-dead-or-is-he-not-dead part of this, I had to get those stones. And that meant breaking into the house where I’d arrived. The place that we were renting in the other now. They must have fallen out there. What other explanation could there be?

  As I stood there, thinking about the intricacies of this alternative reality, I slowly became aware of the silent standoff happening between the guys.

  Oliver still stood leaning against the door, but there was a tenseness to him that his whole, I’m just a guy who leans, posture belied.

  They stared at each other, like they were sizing each other up.

  “No fighting.” I might as well get that out of the way. We wouldn’t accomplish anything if we were at each other’s throats.

  “You went to him first?” Colton asked, his voice giving away a tinge of hurt.

  Fuck my life. “Actually, I went to Aaron first. Because he was the one whose number came up in my phone first.” It suddenly struck me that the Aaron in both of these realities had the same phone number. How weird. And also mind blowing. Maybe they’d think the same thing. “Do you know you have the same phone numbers?” I pulled my phone from my pocket and dialed Colton’s number.

  I stared at him, eyebrows raised, but it didn’t connect. There went that theory.

  “Guess it was a good thing I called Aaron, huh?” I chuckled, but it was one of those awkward chuckles that follow not-very-funny jokes. Okay. Time to move on. “It doesn’t matter who I called first. I need all of your help. So—can we go get those fancy stones that help me jump between realities and work the rest out later?”

  The guys exchanged glances. It was Thorn who shrugged. “Whatever you need, Lacey. We’re in.”

  “Susan!” Colton led the way from his office, breezing right by Oliver like he didn’t exist. “Cancel my meetings! I’m leaving for the afternoon!”

  Chapter 9

  Aaron studied the four of us as we emerged from the building. Colton took one look at him, then one look at his car, and shook his head. “Nope. No way. That thing has scabies.”

  “Don’t be a snob.” My hands twitched with the need to smack Colton upside the head. I clenched my fists to stop myself. This Colton was different, and he didn’t think about other people’s feelings.

  Aaron’s car was fine.

  “Hey, if you want to drive, go ahead,” Aaron replied, surprising me with his shrug and casual response. “Save me gas money.”

  Colton nodded, leading us to a fancy, shiny SUV in the parking lot. I stared at it, more than aware that it cost more than I made in all the years I worked for Rick.

  Oliver whistled. “I’m in the wrong career.”

  “Nah. Christopher had it coming,” Colton replied. “If you hadn’t done it, I would have. Never thought to thank you for it.”

  Oliver paused before jumping in the car. “Yeah. Uh. Sure.”

  Thorn patted him on the back before opening the passenger door and sliding in. Huh. For all of Aaron’s warnings about their relationship, it seemed like they were sort of sliding into old habits. When the five of us were together, things just… worked.

  It was like I had to be there for this to function the way that it had to. Or maybe I was overthinking this. I had a tendency to do that.

  We were all quiet for a long moment before Oliver spoke again. “This would be just like my father to think he had the right to go ahead and mess with time. Why couldn’t he just leave things as they were?”

  “Dad always thinks he can do better.” Aaron shrugged. “There’s nothing wrong with trying to improve upon yourself, but I agree, he did wrong this time.”

  That was a change. Aaron always sided with Oliver when it came to their dad, and it wasn’t that he wasn’t this time, but the feeling was different. He wasn’t one hundred percent with him. But then again, Oliver had spent time in jail. What had that done to the Chees? Maybe that bonded Aaron differently with his father. Time Aaron spent in the other timeline with Oliver, he spent with his father.

  Maybe. I was still trying to figure all of this out. If that was even possible.

  Chapter 10

  Aaron was watching me weirdly. His gaze kept going to the window, and then over to me. Back and forth. It was making me twitchy.

  “Are you okay?” I asked.

  He nodded, making a noncommittal sound. “So do you remember what these rocks—or stones—or whatever they were, looked like?”

  I’d only glanced at them. One had been pretty and blue. The other one… “One looked like green fungus that had hardened. It’s not pleasant.” It had been kind of yucky looking.

  Aaron narrowed his eyes as he stared at the scenery. “Hard green fungus… Holy shit.”

  He glanced past me to Oliver. “Ol. Atacamite. It opens the third eye. Helps people see into other dimensions and lives.”

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about at all,” his brother replied. “But that sounds just like Dad. So good. Something blue and something gross. Got it. I’m sure when we’re digging under beds and through garbage, it’ll just pop right out at us.”

  Speaking of popping… “I did actually appear in the person’s bedroom. I think it’s because that was where I left you all.”

  “Oh really?” I met Colton’s interested gaze in the rearview mirror. “And what were all of us doing in the bedroom?”

  My face heated, and I couldn’t hold his stare, so I arched an eyebrow and replied snarkily, “Planning to save the world.”

  Colton knew I was full of shit, though, because he just laughed. “Oh, I’m sure we were.” He chuckled again and shook his head. “Well, at least we have the room narrowed down. One bedroom in this universe. Hopefully, they didn’t drop out of your pocket while you were traveling the rainbow bridge.”

  He’d lost me. “The rainbow bridge?”

  Thorn turned in the front seat. “Colton is obsessed with Marvel movies. He’s talking about the bridge Thor travels between Earth and Asgard.”

  Oh. Right. Obviously. I probably shouldn’t get so high and mighty about this though, considering I had traveled through dimensions to an alternate reality.

  “What do you think will happen when we find the stones?” Thorn asked. The smile faded from his lips. “Are you going to disappear? Will that be it?”

  “If it is, then that’s the way it’s supposed to be,” Colton surprised me by answering. “The sooner she finds the stones and gets back to us, the sooner we can all be together the way we were meant to be.”

  “I’m all for that,” Oliver muttered. He reached for me and then stopped, placing his hands back in his lap. I noticed that they shook and that he linked his fingers together to hide it.

  Studying him, I took in the way he was swallowing hard. His face was pale and sweaty, and he looked like he might
get sick.

  Without thinking, I took his hands and squeezed them in one of mine. He was much bigger, but I wanted to give him some comfort. “Are you okay?”

  He shrugged. “If I’m not, it’s my own fault.”

  I leaned my head on his shoulder and then sat up straight. This Oliver broke my heart. “You’re hard on yourself in both of these realities,” I said quietly. “Be a little bit nicer. If anyone deserves it, you do.”

  He cocked an eyebrow, a smirk on his face. “Are you telling me to be kind to myself?”

  “Do I sound like a meme?” I grinned at him.

  Oliver blinked. “A what?”

  I opened and closed my mouth. Well, that was a big difference. Unless Oliver just didn’t know what that was. I turned to Colton. “Do you know what a meme is?”

  He shook his head. “Nope. What is that?”

  My heart rate kicked up. What else was different? Did other things just not exist? What else had been changed besides the structure of the town?

  Aaron laughed. “They’re fucking with you. Both of them know what a meme is. Oliver really likes the one with the grumpy cat.”

  Colton’s smile was huge. “I like the one with the monkey.”

  The monkey? I wasn’t sure what that was. But I liked how they teased me, even if it made my cheeks hot. I loved they still had this in them here.

  “Okay. Pick on the poor girl from the other timeline.”

  Everyone was laughing. I was so glad for this moment. This was real, this was us. I could feel who they were on the inside, even this lost version of Oliver. Eventually, we pulled up to the right street. I directed them to the house, and we ended up a bit down the block, not wanting to alert anyone by being too close to it.

  “You said you could break in?” I asked Oliver, watching his shaking hands.

  “I can. You may not like it. But I can do it.”

  Aaron winced. “What are you going to do?”

  “I’m going to terrify the homeowners, lock them in a room, and wait for you to find your stuff and get out. Then I’ll let them out.”