by Rebel Hart
He snickered. “Oh, come on, Max. Don’t tell me she’s made you soft. That nerd? She’s got less going for her than a stripper on a Tuesday afternoon shift, and you--”
Before I could think, I charged him. No one spoke about Dani that way. Especially not a pea-sized vermin like my cousin. I fisted his shirt and barreled him against the wall. His back slammed with such a fury that his eyes widened. I lifted him off his feet, snarling as his hands wrapped around my wrists.
“Holy shit, Max. What the--put me down. Dude! It was just a fucking joke!”
I growled. “Say another fucking word, Benj. I dare you.”
He glared at me. “Or you’ll what?”
I pulled him away from the wall and dragged his face up to mine.
“Or I’ll drown you with your own fucking teeth.”
He scoffed. “Dude, relax. Seriously. You’re wound way too tight. I’m just pulling your damn leg. Fucking hell, man. You’re a really easy target, you know that?”
I paused. “What?”
He shoved my hands away. “I was just messing with you. You really think I’d talk about your girl like that seriously? Shit, I have more sense than that.”
“Obviously not.”
“Well, you’ve never fucking come at me for shit like that before. The hell’s gotten into you?”
I took a step back. “What did you come here for?”
He sighed. “I’m worried about you, man. I’ve never known you to get so hot over the stupidest shit. Especially some chick. And this on the heels of, well, this?”
He ran his hand up and down in the air, signaling to my body. My crooked form. The bruises still shining on my face. My lip that still wasn’t quite healed up.
I reached my hand behind my neck and rubbed at the bruises. They weren’t welted any longer, but they still hurt to the touch.
“You sure you’re doing okay, Max?”
I gnawed on the inside of my cheek. “What happened to you that night?”
He blinked. “What?”
“The night you called and told me you needed to meet me. To talk with me. What the hell happened to you?”
“I got a bit… distracted.”
My face fell. “Let me guess. College bitches?”
He grinned. “Possibly.”
“And then you complain to me because you don’t understand why you haven't been initiated yet?”
He paused. “What?”
“Seriously, Benj. You crawl up my ass and make yourself a little home every time you want to harp on the fact that it’s prospect season and I won’t let you become one. And then you pull stunts like this and wonder why I don’t induct you? You’re irresponsible at best, unreliable at worst. And if you want to be part of this MC, you have to step up and be consistent.”
“Wow, you’re really being serious right now.”
“Of course I’m being serious! Because you know what would’ve happened that night? The night I was jumped? Had it been any other guy holding me up from leaving, he would’ve stayed true to his word. He would’ve gotten his ass down there because he knew not to waste my fucking time, and he would’ve seen what was going on.”
He blinked. “So, this is you being pissed because I wasn’t there to help you fight off whoever it was that jumped you?”
“No, this is about you simply not doing what you said you would. And the consequences that stem from that. Had it been Rupert, or John, or anyone else, they would’ve come down, seen what was happening, and jumped in immediately. Because we’re family. All of us are brothers.”
“Well, I’m your cousin.”
“I’m not talking about that kind of family, shithead. I’m talking about the kind that stands with one another. That stands by each other, through thick and thin. You want to know what I think?”
His nose rose higher in the air. “What do you think?”
“I think you saw what was happening and became chickenshit.”
He balked. “I--what--the fuck did you just say?”
I took a step toward him. “You heard me. I think you came downstairs, saw what was happening, and got scared. Poor little Benji, not wanting to get his hands dirty.”
“I get my hands dirty all the fucking time! Like that bullshit job we never got paid for.”
His hands came down against my chest and he shoved me away. Or at least, he tried. I stood there like the rock solid human being I was. And the second he realized what had happened, he took a step back.
“Max, I’m sorry.”
I narrowed my eyes. “You’re what now?”
He held up his hands. “I’m just pissed off that you’d think, even for a second, that actual blood-family would leave you hanging out to dry like that.”
I shrugged. “My father does it all the time.”
“Well, I’m not your fucking father.”
“No. At least my father has a pair of balls.”
“Are you kidding me right now with this shit? I come over here to see how you’re doing and you attack me like this?”
I held up my hand. “Save it. I don’t have the energy for it. I’ll only say this. You don’t get to fuck around and go back on your word and only show up when it’s convenient for you, and then get what you want. It’s all or nothing. All of the damn time. You don’t get to slack off because we’re related and then get inducted. That isn’t how shit works around here.”
He shook his head. “Get the stick out of your ass, Max. You think I want to be part of that hellhole now? I’ve got better things going for me. Like school, for one. Hell, I don’t even want to be part of your little rinky dink operation anymore anyway.”
Good. “Glad to hear it.”
He started backing up toward the driveway. “Oh, and another thing. What I’ve got brewing? It’s better than the Red Thorns. Better than what you, or anyone else, could’ve provided for me. You can’t even get us paid for fucking jobs we work. How pathetic is that?”
I quirked an eyebrow. “Oh? Did a better opportunity fall into your weasely little lap?”
I felt my anger mounting, but I was proud of how I kept my cool on the outside. I stared Benji down as he kept backing toward the road. His words were music to my ears. My cousin was young and stupid. He had too much going for him in terms of book smarts to be part of some shit like this anyway. This kind of life was for men who had nowhere else to turn. Nothing to give the world, except for their darkness. But as he continued backing toward the driveway, I noticed something.
I didn’t see his bike around.
“And what if I did find a better opportunity? Huh? That make you worried?”
My eyes darted around the curb. “Not at all.”
“You sure? You’re not worried that your little Red Thorns might be in trouble without me?”
I snickered. “Gotta show up in order to contribute something, cuz.”
He frowned at me. “How about you worry about your little small-time crew, and I’ll worry about me. How does that sound?”
“Get the hell out of here while I’m still allowing you to go.”
“Allowing me? With the condition your body is in, I’m sure you couldn’t--shit!”
I charged him again, pushing through the pain as I ran after him. He spun around like the little pussy he was and raced for the road. Took a right and just kept on running. And running. And running. Until his body faded into the darkness. I panted for air as I stood there, waiting for the sound of a bike. Or the sound of an engine. Anything to signal to me that Benji was actually leaving.
I didn’t hear anything, though.
Just the chirping of crickets as darkness fell upon my home.
I stalked back over to my stool, but something wasn’t sitting right with all of this. Something in the back of my head kept nagging at me. Asking an impossible question that almost seemed too weird in its own right.
Does Benji know more about this than he’s letting on?
I mean, it didn’t make any sense. The boy was a nuisance. A fly I kept havi
ng to swat away because of his persistence. He couldn’t organize his own damn school schedule, much less something like a hit.
No, Benji would’ve never done something like that.
That doesn’t mean he has no information, though.
As I went back to buffing my bike, the question kept swirling around. I couldn’t shake the idea that, somehow, Benji was wrapped up in all this. I mean, he got very defensive when I accused him of seeing what happened and being too chickenshit to intervene. I’d never seen him get irritated over anything the way he got over that. Benji knew better than to try and take me on.
So why did he get so bent out of shape over that assumption?
More questions, and still no answers.
Fucking story of my life.
11
Dani
I ran my fingers through my hair as I caught glimpses of Hannah in the mirror. I was excited about my date with Max tonight. But my roommate was still ignoring me. She wouldn’t look at me if she didn’t have to. She didn’t acknowledge me, except to say ‘excuse me’ or ‘need this?’ It was awful. I hated it. But I wouldn’t cave in. I wouldn't let her guilt me into admitting that I had somehow done something wrong.
Because I hadn’t.
“Where are you going tonight?” I asked.
I tried pinning my hair back as I watched Hannah flip a page of her textbook.
“Getting into anything fun?”
She licked her lips and flipped another page. Much too fast to actually be reading. I rolled my eyes. I couldn’t stand people who were passive aggressive. And I wouldn't live my second semester like this, either. I’d put in for a change in accommodations if things kept on like this.
“Can I borrow your purple lipstick? It’ll go well with my blouse.”
I just knew that’d get her to pipe up. She hated it when I called her favorite lipstick purple. “It’s aubergine,” she’d correct me before handing it over.
But all she did was flip another page of her book.
Fine. Suit yourself.
I slid my hands down my purple blouse. Another purchase by my mother snuck into my things. And while I usually complained about such nonsense, I wasn’t tonight. I had on a pair of my tight black jeans with my chucks instead of heels. Especially since heels weren’t very comfortable on the back of Max’s bike. So to take things up a notch, I’d decided on this blouse. It cut a bit deep against my chest and had a flowing texture to it. One that drew the eye down my body.
And pairing it with my leather jacket made me feel strong.
“So is it all right if I…?”
I pointed toward Hannah’s makeup bag, but she didn’t say anything. So I walked over and rummaged around until I found the lipstick. Then I swiped a couple of coats against my lips. I felt her eyes on me as I did so, glaring at me. I rolled the lipstick down and tossed it back to her bag. I missed the opening and it clattered to the floor.
I caught her eye in the mirror. “Whoops. Sorry.”
Her nostrils flared and I saw her hands white-knuckling her textbook. If she really wanted to work that hard not to talk to me, then it spoke to the pettiness of her character. And it wasn’t something I’d give in to. I’d make her talk to me. There were two of us living in this dorm room and I didn’t want to feel weird or isolated or smoked out every time she was around.
“Well, I’m off. You need anything before I go?” I asked.
I spun around and faced her, not shocked that she didn’t respond.
“All right, then. Have a good time tonight. Don’t wait up.”
I gathered my things and walked out the door, not bothering to close it. Hannah had already hurt my feelings by flagrantly making plans in front of me after classes and not inviting me to go out. Not that I would’ve been able to. Max and I had already discussed our date plans this morning. But it would’ve been nice to have been invited.
At the very least, it would’ve been nice not to listen to Hannah as she made those plans. Right in front of my face. While standing in the middle of the dorm room. Giggling her face off.
Passive aggressive jerk.
But none of that mattered. I was only seconds away from seeing Max. From throwing my arms around him and racing off into the darkness of the night. I needed this, too. I needed him. To see him. To kiss him. To touch him. To feel him.
I hadn’t seen him since our evening in the sauna.
And I was already having withdrawals.
While part of me felt guilty about the strain on my friendship with Hannah, the other part of me didn’t care. I liked Max. A lot. He was quickly becoming part of my world. And if Hannah didn’t want to accept that, then there was nothing I could do about it. She didn’t have a say in who I did or did not see. She didn’t get to ice me out in an attempt to veto someone out of my world. This is what she’d wanted, anyway! For me to find someone. Make friends. Date someone. Lose my damn virginity.
Why was she suddenly pissed off?
Just focus on your date. Nothing else matters.
I smiled. Nothing else mattered at all. The only thing that mattered was the time I got to spend with Max. I pushed my way out of the dorm and started walking across the lawn. I slipped between two buildings before crossing the road, headed for that flickering lamplight. Why the city hadn’t fixed it, I didn’t know. But as I stood there, waiting for Max to arrive, I drew in a deep breath.
My eyes rose to the dorm and I saw a shadowy figure standing at the window. Hannah. I felt her eyes on me as she stood there with her arms tucked around her stomach. As if she were holding something in with all her might.
Guilt pooled in my gut before the sound of a bike tore through my thoughts.
The curtain fell in front of Hannah as Max turned the corner. I pulled my eyes away from the building and smiled as he rode up. I slipped my purse up my shoulder and held it close to me, watching. Waiting. Vibrating with anticipation as he pulled up. His bike sputtered as his feet touched down onto the pavement. He slid his helmet off and let his eyes slip down my body. The way he licked his lips shot fire through my veins. When he reached around to grab my helmet, I finally spoke.
“Missed you.”
He handed my helmet to me. “Missed you, too. Ready to go?”
“I’ve been ready all day, handsome.”
He chuckled. “Good. Hop on, Bambi. We got a night to enjoy.”
I slipped the helmet over my head, priding myself in the fact that I was getting better at it. I stuck my purse in his storage compartment, then tossed my leg over the back of his bike. The more I rode with him, the more comfortable I felt. And when Max revved his engine, I saw a handful of students look our way.
Watching us as he revved his engine one last time.
I like how they stare at us.
I threaded my arms around Max’s waist and leaned against him. I shifted down the seat, feeling the warmth of my inner thighs grace his back. I laid my helmeted head between his shoulder blades and drew in a deep breath. With one last pump of the gas, he took off from the curb.
Parting the seas of the night that swallowed us whole almost immediately.
I tightened my grip and held on to him. I fisted his jacket with my hands as I smiled beneath my helmet, moving with the bike. I clenched my thighs as tightly as I could, hanging on for dear life. I relished the feeling of freedom these rides always gave me. We rode in silence, my body drinking in the feel of his as I pressed even deeper against him.
His back rumbled with his growl.
I giggled at the sharp turns and squealed with the high speeds. It didn’t take me long at all to figure out that Max took the long way to our final destinations. Not that I minded. On the contrary, I adored it. I liked the fact that he wanted to take me riding. That he wanted me there, clinging to him. Behind him. Seated against him, with him at the helm. Guiding us wherever he thought appropriate. With Max, I could let go. I didn’t have to focus on tests, or midterms, or study dates, or family plans. I didn’t have to focus on the
drama with Hannah, or her expectations of me, or those stupid dorm parties I had stopped attending.
With Max, there was no pressure. The word ‘no’ didn’t come with the silent treatment or some sort of retribution. It didn’t come with failing grades or disappointed parents. All it came with was a head-nod and a suggestion of something different.
He respected my boundaries.
And I really liked that.
I felt the bike slowing down and I finally looked up. My grip around his waist loosened as he pulled into a parking lot. I heard music thumping from the walls of the building in front of us. There was a small line out the door and men dressed in black taking IDs and marking on the tops of people’s hands. My eyes searched the building for a sign. Something that told me where we were.
Arbor Days.
Huh.
“Ready?” Max asked.
I had been in such a daze that I didn’t realize we had parked. I felt my helmet being slid off my head and I tried to fix the shocked expression on my face. Arbor Days was one of the trendiest clubs around here. Just on the outskirts of town, it was a fabulous restaurant I couldn’t ever afford during the day. And at night, it turned into a lounge and rooftop dance club with live music, great food and drinks, and college kids of all sorts trying to barge their way in and get a taste of things.
“It’s so good to see you.”
Max’s breathless words made my heart stop. It finally pulled me from my trance and I gazed up at him. He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear before he cupped my cheek. His touch felt warm. It sizzled my skin and made the hair on the nape of my neck pucker. His grin sent my gut humming and I felt a flush working its way down my body. I had no idea why in the world this man made me feel the way he did, but I never wanted it to end.
I smiled. “I missed you too, Max.”
He groaned. “Say it again.”
I giggled. “I’ve missed you, Max.”
His lips approached my own, nipping, but not kissing. I gasped as I felt his breath pulsing against my skin. When I leaned in to kiss him, he fisted my hair softly. He held me where he wanted me as his eyes found mine. And I sat there, waiting for his command.
