by Rebel Hart
Max growled. “Just give her a second, damn it.”
The warm blanket wrapping around me felt like knives against my skin. I fought Max’s movements, but I wasn’t strong enough to bat them off. Tears rushed my eyes once more, trickling aimlessly down my cheeks. And every time I drew in a shuddered breath, I started coughing again.
Before throwing up more water onto the truck’s floorboard.
“She needs a damn doctor.”
“And I’ll get her one.”
“She needs one now, Max.”
“Then fucking pull over and call 911! But if you want to make it out of this without handcuffs, keep driving until we get back to the damn house!”
I whimpered as I curled tighter into him. It felt as if my body was rebelling against his efforts. Why did the blanket hurt? Why did my feet feel as if they were on fire? Why couldn't I close my hands tight enough to hang on?
Why am I so helpless?
I was worried that I needed a hospital. But we were in no position to go to the hospital. And I finally understood the predicament Max had been in the day he was jumped. The hospital wasn’t an option. I mean, someone had just shot Max’s father, for crying out loud!
“Who--who shot—?”
I managed to stammer the words out between my clattering teeth.
“I did,” Rupert said.
I looked up into Max’s face. “You--dove in?”
He grinned down at me. “Did you really expect me to do anything else?”
Yeah. No hospital for us. Rupert had just killed Max’s father, and the police sure as hell didn’t need to be catching up with us. Not after tonight. Because I honestly wasn’t sure anyone would believe what had happened tonight. I placed my cheek against his shoulder and felt him wrap the rest of the blanket around my legs. It felt like my head was in a vise grip that someone kept tightening.
I closed my eyes and forced myself to focus on Max.
“Thank you for coming for me,” I whispered.
He cupped my cheek. “Of course I came for you. I always will.”
I felt his body shaking and heard the tears in his eyes. I felt his hand trembling against my cheek as his thumb stroked me softly, smoothing away my own tears while his dripped steadily onto my forehead. I looked to the side, watching as Max’s thumb came into my view every once in a while.
And if his thumb was that bloodied, I was worried about the rest of him.
“What happened to you?” I asked.
I gazed back up into his face as my vision finally focused. When I saw the bruises and the swelling and the cuts, open and bleeding, I gasped. Which spurred on another coughing session. Which caused me to lunge off to the side and vomit, once again, onto the floorboard of the truck.
I saw the gash in Max’s thigh now, how tattered his jeans were. How bruised his body was. His ribs were black, his knuckles split and red from fighting. His face was almost unrecognizable with all the bruises and scabs and the swelling that had taken over his eyes.
My breath caught in my throat. “Oh, my God.”
Rupert craned his neck back. “We’re still fifteen minutes out from the house. Sure you don’t want to change your mind?”
I shook my head. “No hospitals. We can’t--I can’t--”
The coughing started up again, only this time I couldn't control it. It felt like something was lodged in my lungs. Something my body wanted to get out but couldn't. I pressed my hand into my chest. When the heel of my hand touched my sternum, I thought I was going to blow through the roof. My coughing became yelling. My body started shaking. And when Max pulled me back against his body, he turned me.
Max stumbled over his words. “I don’t--I just--we--”
Rupert sighed. “Come on, Max. Listen to that cough.”
My eyes widened as my hand fell against his chest. He jumped at my touch as my fingertips found the tattoo over his heart. The one that matched the tattoo I had on my thigh, to be exact. The skin beneath it was bruised and puckered. There was something that looked like a blood blister forming beneath it, threatening to break and destroy the entire masterpiece. Tears flooded my face. I felt my body trembling uncontrollably.
All of this had happened to Max because I hadn’t listened to Rupert.
You should’ve stayed in your dorm room.
My lip quivered. “I’m so sorry.”
Max’s grip tightened on me. “Rupert, how far away are we from the hospital?”
“Less than fifteen minutes, I can tell you that.”
I sniffled. “I’m so fucking sorry. Please forgive me. I--I only wanted t--oh, fuck.”
The guilt was too much. It filled my stomach and pushed any of the contents I still had left in it over the top. Max turned me onto my side as I started to choke. I tried coughing, but I couldn't get it up. It felt lodged. It felt stuck. And no matter how hard I tried breathing, or coughing, or gagging, or gasping, nothing came loose.
Had I just listened, none of this would have happened. Had I listened to Rupert, Max would be fine. I’d be fine. But I had to go and play the hero. I had to go and get myself caught. I had to go and find Max, which got us nothing but beaten to hell and almost killed. I was an idiot. Max had fallen in love with an idiot.
He deserves better.
I heard the boys fighting, but their voices seemed far away. My vision tunneled and my lungs started to burn again. I couldn't take it. The pain was too much. Part of my body begged for death, and the other part of me scrambled for life. I didn’t deserve it, though. Not after getting Max into this situation. Not after putting Rupert in danger like I had.
I should’ve stayed dead. Maybe everyone would be better off.
“Turn around. Now.”
Max’s growling voice caught my ear and I shook my head. No. The last thing we needed was a hospital. I didn’t need my boys in a bigger mess because of me. If I needed to die to keep them safe, I would.
Anything to keep Max safe.
I wheezed. “No. We have to get out of town. The police--”
I felt something burst in my throat before puke flooded my lungs. I heard Max growling again before the tires of the truck squealed. My body flew off to the side. Max held me as tightly as he could while my lungs tried to bury me underneath once more. I felt him rubbing my back and telling me to relax. As if that would magically solve all my problems. But the more Max stroked my back, the more I felt my muscles relaxing anyway.
And soon, my lungs felt relief.
“Oh--fuck--I--ugh.”
Max sighed. “There it is. Get it up. Don’t worry about anything else.”
Rupert cleared his throat. “She throwing up finally?”
I nodded, but I couldn't speak. It felt like the pain was endless. And even though my stomach felt empty, my lungs still felt full. How was that possible? What in the world was my body doing? The coughing fit started again before I could catch my breath and I felt my brain squeezing in on itself. I felt my stomach protruding as if it were filled with too much water.
No.
Not my stomach.
Is that my bladder?
There was too much chaos in my mind. There were too many sounds happening all at once. I tried locking on to Max’s voice. Or Rupert’s. Anything that might ground me back into reality. But I couldn't. Every time I latched onto something, my mind gravitated back to the pain. My eyes reminded me of just how beat up Max really was. I hurt so badly my body almost forgot about it, as weird as that sounded. I had moments of lucidity followed by moments that didn’t make sense. I saw flashes of light before darkness fell over my eyes. They’d focus, then unfocus. As if attempting to save me from the world still swirling around me.
And all of it culminated as a stark, disgusting reminder of who was really responsible for this.
Me.
I was responsible for all of this.
3
Max
The second she started coughing, I grew concerned. It was still wet. Still ferocious. Still making her
heave. After all this time out of the water, with everything she had already brought up, she shouldn't still be struggling to breathe. She shouldn't have had to work so hard at it.
Rupert shook his head. “We have to turn around. This is serious, Max.”
I brushed her hair back. “I’ll call the doctor and have him meet us at the--”
“She needs a fucking team, Max! Look at her!”
My eyes fell to Dani’s pale face. Her body shook uncontrollably. Goosebumps fled along her skin. No matter how tightly I held her, I couldn't warm her up. She kept growing colder and colder in my arms. Despite my muscles trying so hard to reverse the damage that had already been done.
“Max!”
I grunted. “I’m thinking.”
“Well, think a bit faster before she dies in my backseat.”
My eyes shot up to Rupert and I saw him glaring at me in the rearview mirror. He was right, though. Something was off. Dani had been submerged for much too long, and there was no telling the damage that might have been done. This was more than just lungfuls of water. This was more than just being underneath the surface for a bit too long.
Dani had effectively died. I wasn’t sure how long she’d been out. But my thoughts were quickly pierced by the sound of the love of my life gagging again.
“Gorgeous?”
She turned to the side and her stomach started jumping again. But nothing came up.
“Dani! What’s wrong? What can I do?”
Rupert growled. “You can take her to the hospital.”
“Will you fucking shut up for one goddamn second!?”
Dani threw her head over to the side, away from my chest. It was all I could do to catch her before she fell to the floorboards of the truck. She gasped for air. I felt her stomach contracting. It was like her body was trying to get something up but couldn't. My heart raced out of control. I looked outside and felt more frustrated than ever.
More upset than ever.
More lost than ever.
“Turn around. Now,” I said.
I heard Dani wheeze. “No. We have to get out of town. The police--”
Rupert whipped the truck around. “Fucking finally. We’re less than five minutes out. I can have us there in a jiff. Hang on.”
I growled. “Hurry it up. She can’t get whatever this is up.”
“Fucking hell.”
I heard the tires beneath his truck practically screaming for mercy. We kicked up burnt rubber in our wake as he sped down the road. I held on to Dani as tightly as I could. I placed my forehead against the back of her head, feeling her body rebel against itself. I rubbed her back, digging my fingers into her muscles. I tried desperately to get her to relax. To get her to stop freaking out long enough to let her body take control.
“It’s okay, gorgeous. Relax. Just relax. I know it’s hard, but you have to relax for me. Okay?”
“Oh--fuck--I--ugh.”
I sighed with relief once I heard something splash against my feet. “There it is. Get it up. Don’t worry about anything else. You’re okay.”
Rupert cleared his throat. “She throwing up finally?”
I nodded my head as I brushed Dani’s hair away from her face. And when she was done emptying the contents of her body onto my boots, I rolled her back against me. I wiped away a crusted trail leaking down her chin. I gazed into her tired eyes, and the terror behind them gripped me. I felt helpless. For the first time in my life, I didn’t know what the fuck I could do to make this better. It killed me inside, not being able to help. Not being able to relieve her of this pain and take it upon my shoulders.
I looked deep into her eyes. “You keep fighting, okay? You keep hanging on, and I promise you we’ll get out of this.”
She nodded as tears rushed her eyes. She tried to say something, but I pressed my finger against her lips.
“Save your energy. You're going to need it for the doctors at the hospital.”
She shook her head side to side, but I gripped her chin.
“Yes. You need more than my doctor can provide. Understood?”
Tears lined her eyes and it broke my heart. And the entire time, I kept thinking about what kind of bullshit my father’s death would leave behind. I knew it couldn't spell anything good for myself. Or for John. I mean, who knew the kind of debts my father still had out there. Who knew the kind of people he had been trying to cut his deals with. For all I knew, they’d come after us now. Looking for someone to fulfill the deals my father had created.
If he’s even dead.
I looked back up at the rearview mirror and saw Rupert shooting us nervous glances. He was a fucking rock. Nothing made the man waver. So to see him worried meant that my worry was founded. Dani kept coughing, struggling to breathe. It was as if she was still drowning, even though she wasn’t anywhere near water.
“Can you go any faster, Rupert?”
I felt his engine rev. “I’ll push this truck to the limit, if that’s what it takes.”
“How far out?”
“One stoplight. Which I’m going to blaze through if it turns red.”
I nodded. “Do it. If you get caught, I’ll pay the ticket.”
I tried my damndest to stay in control of my own panic. Because the last thing Dani needed to see every time she looked up at me was a frazzled, worried asshole. But every second that passed by--every cough I heard gurgle up her throat--sent my soul into a frenzied state. I felt more overwhelmed than I ever had in my entire life. I was in control of nothing. All I could do was sit there, hold her, and keep telling her shit would be all right.
When I had no idea.
“It’s okay. Everything’s going to be fine, all right, gorgeous?”
I looked down at her and found her eyes rolling back.
“Rupert!”
His tires skidded. “Pulling up to the emergency entrance now!”
I braced myself as the truck slung me into the back wall. I held Dani tightly against me as my shoulder slammed into the side. I swallowed down the roar of pain that threatened to burst from my throat. I looked outside and saw people watching us as burnt rubber swirled around the vehicle. Rupert leapt out of his truck and ripped the back door open. And before he could get a word in edgewise, I slid off the seat with Dani in my arms.
“You park. I’m finding a fucking doctor.”
He patted my back. “I’ll come find you guys.”
I wasted no time charging through the doors of that emergency room.
“I need a doctor! Now!”
Everyone turned their heads to face me before a nurse jumped up from behind a desk.
“I need a doctor, a mobile bed, and some fucking answers!”
Staff converged onto me and someone took Dani from my arms. I balled up my fists, ready for a fight as I felt nurses’ hands all over my torso. Someone shone a light into my eyes as Dani was placed on a moving bed and rushed off through a set of metal double doors as nurses poked and prodded at my body.
“He’s got broken ribs.”
“His nose looks crushed, too.”
“We need to get the swelling down in that eye. He’ll lose his sight if we don’t.”
I shook them off. “Dani! I’m coming!”
Someone grabbed my arm. “You need medical treatment, too.”
I whipped around on the nurse before a man in a white coat came trotting up with a wheelchair. I looked at the pathetic device before glaring at the people standing in front of me.
I thumbed over my shoulder. “I’m not the one that needs help. She is.”
The doctor nodded his head. “You need attention, too. She’s being taken care of. Let us take you back and--”
I shook my head. “The only thing you need to do right now is tell me where the fuck you’ve taken my girl.”
“Sir, if you don’t calm down, I’m going to have to sedate you.”
I turned toward the voice and saw her holding a needle in her hand. I ripped it from her grasp and tossed it back to t
he doctor, who fumbled around with it. After catching it in his hands, needle point down, his eyes slowly came back up to mine.
“Tell me where she is. Now.”
He sighed. “What happened to you two tonight? I need to know everything I can in order to help her.”
“She was submerged underwater for over two minutes. I don’t know how long she was unconscious before I pulled her from the pool.”
“Chlorine, or salt water?”
I sighed. “Chlorine.”
The doctor shook his head. “Did she suffer any trauma before that? A head injury? A punch to the gut or the chest? Anything that could’ve knocked her out or knocked her breathless before she went under?”
“She told me nothing like that happened.”
“How did the drowning occur?”
I blinked. “She got herself hooked onto a chair that tipped backwards and she couldn't get herself free.”
“And you’re the one that found her?”
“Yes.”
His eyes ran down my body. “Nurse, get him a bed next to her room.”
I growled. “I told you, I don’t need--”
He pointed his finger at me. “I don’t know who you are or who you think you’re bossing around, but the second you stepped through those emergency doors, she and you became my priority. Make no mistake. I will have you bussed to a different hospital if you’re going to stand in my way and refuse treatment when you so clearly need it. Got it?”
I choked down the want to make this man swallow his own fucking teeth.
“Yeah. Got it.”
Rupert ran up behind me, panting. “Where is she? Where’s Bambi?”
The doctor furrowed his brow. “Bambi?”
I sighed. “Nickname for the girl you just took back.”
The doctor nodded. “You got her real name?”
My face fell flat. “Dani Young.”
Rupert interjected. “Hi. Yes. Where is she? I’d like to see her.”
I licked my lips. “We both would.”
The doctor held his head high. “Do you consent to being treated? And acting accordingly in the presence of staff?”
I looked around at the nurses surrounding me. They were ready, willing, and capable of doing whatever it took to make sure I was all right. I needed to not be so angry. Why the fuck was I so angry?
