Blind Date

by Debbie Ioanna

“What’s the matter?” He looked genuinely confused, but I didn’t want to hang around for him another second, nor wait for Sarah’s phone call.

  “Goodbye.”

  I quickly headed out the door and ran down the cobbled street to Superdrug so I could buy some hand sanitizer. I felt disgusting. I felt filthy. I wouldn’t let my hand touch anything. Not until I had either cleaned it or chopped it off. As I walked through the door, my phone rang.

  “Jenny! You have to come home quick!”

  “You can save it Sarah, I already left.”

  “Really? That was quick. What happened?”

  By the time I had picked some sanitizer and paid for it with my one clean hand on the self-checkout with my phone tucked between my head and my shoulder, I had filled her in on the whole experience. As I told her about the mice, she started to gag down the phone.

  “Oh Jenny,” I could tell she was trying not to retch, “I can’t believe you lasted as long as you did. What was your mother thinking setting you up with him?”

  “Probably a delayed punishment for something from my childhood. I don’t know. But I need to go home and stand under the shower for the rest of the day and possibly bleach my hands.” I squirted loads of hand gel into my palm and then started rubbing it all over my hands and even up my wrists. “What are you doing tomorrow? I feel like I haven’t seen you for ages.”

  “I know, I’ve just been so busy lately. But we’re with Max’s parents tomorrow and I can’t get away. Are you free next Friday night?”

  “No, I have this awards thing for work. I need to be there, my meal has been paid for.”

  “Ok, I’ll call you one night this week and we can catch up. Be careful with the bleach, don’t melt your hands off.”

  “After touching his hand, that might not be a bad thing!”

  17

  Zack lifted his hand to my face and stroked my chin, all the while looking deep into my eyes. His face was so close to mine that I could see my reflection in his eyes. His other hand found my waist and pulled me in closer to him so that our bodies were touching. I could feel him against me, he wanted me. My tingles were out of control, I knew that as soon as he kissed me, I would explode on the spot. I had wanted this moment for years. I could smell him. I could almost taste him. He closed his eyes and moved his face slowly towards mine. I was ready…

  “Ouch!” Bing landed hard on my chest, waking me up from my dream. “Bing, you’re such a wanker!” I pushed him on to the floor and tried to get myself back to sleep, back to being with Zack, but it was no use. I was wide awake now. Flustered, horny and lonely in my big bed.

  I checked my phone to see what time it was and I had only fifteen minutes before my alarm would be going off. That would have been fifteen minutes of erotic dream love making, where there was no fear or boundaries. I hate my cat.

  Bing looked smug when I walked into my kitchen to make a cup of tea. He sat in front of his empty food dish expecting me to fill it.

  “You can jog on.” He yapped at me in response. “And before you even think about it, I’ve shut all the upstairs doors so you can’t leave me any surprises for when I get back tonight.”

  He stood up and with a flick of the tail, which I’m sure is the cat equivalent of giving the finger, he turned and headed towards the door which I gladly opened to get rid of him. Once he was gone, I filled his food dish, hoping he could hear the biscuits hitting the bottom of the bowl from outside. Yea, how do you like that, cat? I can be mean too.

  I already hate today. Not only did I miss out on a mind-blowing, subconscious orgasm, but today is Friday which means I have to attend the annual ceremony of something to do with awards for the company. Each year, different departments are invited along with the individuals who have been nominated. It is seen as a privilege, but our manager told us it was compulsory, so, regardless of whether we wanted to go or not, we didn’t have a choice.

  There was no point in coming home after work to rush to get changed and head back out again, so the whole team decided to hang back at the office to get ready there and share a taxi to the venue. I had carefully folded my black dress into a bag along with shoes and my makeup bag. I’d had a shower that morning, so my hair was looking fresh and glossy.

  “So, no one on our team has been nominated?” Cheryl asked Sam.

  “That’s right.” Sam replied.

  “But we still have to go?”

  “That’s right.” Sam had had this conversation with us all at least once already this week and I could tell she was getting sick of repeating herself.

  “But why?” Cheryl was in her late forties, but she whined like a petulant teenager. She was always the first to complain to Sam about anything and everything, no matter how petty.

  “Look,” Sam was in the ladies toilets with us all getting ready now work was finished. We were almost ready to go. “I know none of us want to go, but in the seven years I’ve worked here our team has never been invited. Funding is already low at the moment but if we snub tonight then they might cut our funding altogether.” She threw her makeup back in her bag and pulled out a hairbrush. “Let’s just go, eat the free food, drink the free wine, and then once the awards are handed out you are free to leave, that’s all I ask.”

  Talk of free food and wine seemed to shut Cheryl up for now. It was only six o’clock though. We weren’t due to be there until seven and a taxi would only take twenty minutes.

  “What can we do before we set off? We’ve got ages yet. Do we nip to the pub for a quick one?” I asked whilst making sure my hair was behaving.

  “No,” Sam said before Cheryl could suggest we nip to the Wetherspoons down the road, “if we head out now then I’ll never get you all in that taxi. I brought a bottle of wine and a few beers with me today. We can sit in the kitchen with the guys until the taxi’s come for us. Does that sound alright?”

  “Sounds good to me!” Cheryl finally cracked a smile and once we were all ready, we met the guys in the kitchen and all had a drink before being led out to the taxi’s waiting for us. It was going to be a long night.

  18

  “And that is why, with your continued hard work and dedication, I know that this time next year we can be stronger yet. Thank you for listening, now on to the awards.” Our elderly Chief Executive finally took his seat away from the microphone.

  That had to be the most boring speech I had ever listened to. I lost count over how many times I had yawned. Every time I did, Cheryl yawned back at me, which made me yawn again. It was a vicious circle yet managed to entertain us for the twenty minutes we had to endure empty words of hope for the company’s future and lies of how much they appreciated all of our hard work.

  “Thank you, Mr Moss,” Mr Leeming, the Managing Director, stepped forward to the microphone, “it is a pleasure to have you here with us this evening.” The lights from above were reflecting from his balding head, almost creating a disco ball effect due to the trickles of sweat making their way down his forehead.

  “Arse kisser alert.” Cheryl whispered to me. I was not expecting to hear that, I almost spat out my prosecco, which left us both in a fit of giggles.

  “Will you two stop giggling,” Sam leaned over to us, “it’s like sitting with children.”

  “Sorry Sam.” We both said as I wiped the prosecco from my chin.

  “Now, it is time for what we have all been waiting for,” Mr Leeming continued, “our awards for esteemed achievements over the last twelve months. This year, I have the honour of presenting the awards and it gives me such pleasure to do so. Twenty-two years ago, I myself was at one of these events when I was just a Junior Assistant working in Public Relations. I was there because I was presented with an award and look at me now.” He smugly pointed at himself. “Hard work brings great results.”

  “And a shiny forehead.” Cheryl whispered to me. I tried to conceal my laughing, but the bouncing shoulders gave me away and we both got scolded again by Sam.

  “Our first award is for ou
tstanding attendance and punctuality…”

  I didn’t know how many awards there were to hand out, but I knew it was going to be a long arse night. I looked around at the other tables wondering if anyone was actually enjoying themselves and they all looked as bored as we were. I did not recognise anyone else in the room. There had to be a hundred people in here. Just how big was this company?

  Someone sitting at a table at the far end of the room caught my eye, although now they were being blocked by someone leaning forward at the table so I couldn’t be sure. It wasn’t him, was it?

  “Our second award is for…”

  The person leaned back in their seat again and then I had a perfect view. It was undeniably him, Zack. He looked positively edible. A dark blue dinner jacket and a white shirt, no tie, top buttons undone revealing a little bit of flesh. I couldn’t believe it. We were both out at an event together, away from the office. I wonder if he has seen me. I am so glad I chose this dress, it shows off my curves in all the right places. I couldn’t take my eyes away from him.

  The room suddenly erupted in applause which woke me up from my man coma. I looked back to the stage to see a young man accepting his award. I didn’t hear his name, but he looked so familiar.

  “Here is your award, sir.” Mr Leeming handed the man his award and shook his hand, posing for the photographer who was standing at the side of the stage. “Everyone, once again, Oliver Hallam.”

  The applause returned, and so did my memory. That was Oliver, from school. I had not seen him since we left there a million years ago. What a blast from the past. His hair was still a fiery red but he had managed to control the curls. He walked down the stage steps and back to his seat only two tables away from mine.

  “Is there anymore prosecco in that bottle?” Cheryl asked me, pointing to the bottle in front of Sam.

  “Probably but, I don’t think she’ll let us have any more until this thing is over.”

  “Damn.”

  Once all the awards were handed out, we were all free to head to the open bar. It’s funny how there is such little funding for our department yet events such as these can be paid for year after year. I would have complained however it was good wine available. James would have been impressed at the selection.

  I was handed my large sauvignon blanc and was about to head back to my table when I saw him standing with a group of men from his team. He looked so handsome, and then he spotted me and smiled. Nothing could make my heart flutter like a smile from Zack, especially when it was directed at me. He said something quickly to his colleagues before away from them and heading in my direction.

  This was it. Do not be a tit. Do not say anything stupid. Do not talk about your cat. Say something nice about him. Compliment him. He looks nice in a suit. It’s nice to see him outside the office. Wouldn’t it be nice to have his babies…?

  “Jenny?” someone from behind tapped me on my shoulder.

  “Yes?” I looked behind me and it was Oliver. He had a huge smile on his face. “Oliver, wow, hi.”

  “I thought it was you,” he pulled me in for a hug that lasted longer than necessary, “It’s so good to see you! How are you?”

  “I’m great thanks,” I looked behind me and Zack had now changed his mind about walking in my direction and resumed his conversation with his colleagues. He actually looked disappointed too. Dammit! “How are you doing?”

  “I’m good, ta. You look stunning, but then you always did.”

  “Aw thank you.” I was trying to sound sincere, but I was too distracted glancing at Zack, hoping to catch his eye again.

  “I didn’t know you worked here too. How long have you been here?”

  “Oh, quite a long time now.”

  “I only started two years ago, I love it...” He carried on talking about himself whilst I spied on Zack. His group was suddenly joined by several pretty girls. One of them, the prettiest of them all, was talking to Zack. It looked like she was flirting with him. Damn her and her fabulously long legs and tiny waist. She looked like she lived on lettuce and air. “…so, what do you think?”

  “I’m sorry?” What was he saying? I hope it was nothing important.

  “Catching up properly tomorrow, what do you think?”

  “Erm, yea, sounds great.” I had nothing better to do, and thinking back, we were friends in school. It would be nice to talk about the good old days and laugh about all the daft things that happened. “I’ll give you my number.”

  “That’s great.” I keyed my number into his phone. “Just text me with a when and where. I’m free all weekend.”

  “I will do.” He looked very happy with himself. I don’t know why though, it was only a catch up.

  “I need to get back to my table,” I looked back around for Zack but he had disappeared. The stick figure tramp was still there though, I’m pleased to say. At least he hadn’t gone home with her, although the night was still young. “I’ll speak to you later.”

  I walked back to my table with a bit of a sulk on. I can’t believe that Zack was coming over to talk to me, me! He wanted to speak to me, but what about? How would that meeting have gone? Just a friendly chat, or some flirting maybe? I’ll never know now. Who knows when I would next see him at work.

  “Are you alright?” Cheryl asked me. “Who was that guy you were talking to?” Cheryl always loved a bit of gossip. Never tell her anything you want keeping a secret. If I had told her about my crush on Zack then he would know about it by now, as would my boss, my mother and the Mayor of London.

  “My friend from school, he won one of the awards. I didn’t know he worked here. We were just catching up. What time is it?”

  “It’s half past ten, are you staying much longer?”

  “Nah,” I couldn’t see Zack anywhere, “I think I’m going to get off actually. Do you want to share a taxi?”

  “No thanks, my friends are in town somewhere so I’m going to go find them.”

  “Do you want this wine then?” It seemed a waste to leave it, even if it was free.

  “Oo yes, thank you.” I handed it over to her. “I’ll see you on Monday.”

  “Yea, good night.”

  I said goodbye to the rest of my table and walked out of the venue, taking my time hoping that I would see Zack in case he was hidden in a corner somewhere out of view, but he was not here. At least I had that exciting bit of gossip to tell Sarah tomorrow. How Zack saw me and started to walk towards me. My life was so exciting.

  19

  I awoke from a disappointing and dreamless sleep. There was no steamy reunion with Zack to pick up from where we left off. All I could see when I closed my eyes was his smile from last night. The smile he had for me. I wonder where he went after Oliver rudely hijacked my once in a lifetime opportunity.

  The sun was fighting its way through my bedroom curtains, so I knew it was morning. When I picked up my phone to check the time, I saw I already had a text from Oliver. It wasn’t even nine o’clock yet.

  “Hey you, it was great bumping into you last night! Are you free tonight? Let’s meet at Circle Lounge in Halifax for a drink. Is 8 ok? I can’t wait to catch up.”

  “Hey, yes, how random that we saw each other after all this time. That sounds good, I’ll see you tonight.”

  It might not be a date, but it was still male company on a Saturday night. I was looking forward to it actually, I needed a break from all these terrible blind dates. Oliver and I were never best friends in school, but we were part of the same group of friends. We had a lot of classes together and went to the same house parties. It would be good to catch up. I’ll have to tell Sarah when I call her later.

  When I finally climbed out of bed, I noticed something odd. There was no sign of Bing. He was always either on my bed or by my bedroom door waiting for me to step out on to the landing, usually so he could walk in front of me to try and trip me up, but I could not see him. He must have got up early. He’ll make himself known in some way later on.

  As I g
ot to the kitchen, I went straight to the bread bin to dig out the crumpets. There were two left. They went out of date yesterday but looked and felt fine so I shoved them in the toaster and flicked on the kettle. My phone started buzzing. It was my mother calling me. I ignored it. I still hadn’t forgiven her for setting me up with Rob.

  Once my crumpets popped up, all hot and crispy, I lathered them in butter and made my way to the living room with a cuppa and phoned Sarah to fill her in.

  “I can’t believe it!” She said. “That was your moment!”

  “I know,” I chomped through my crumpets and wiped the melted butter from my chin, “he probably thought I was being chatted up by Oliver and decided to forget it. That was probably my only chance. And he looked so gorgeous last night. He always looks yummy, but last night was extra yummy with a cherry on top.”

  “Well at least you had some kind of male action, even if it wasn’t the right guy. Tell me about Oliver, is he hot?”

  “Oliver?” I almost spat tea all over my last crumpet at the notion. “Bloody hell, no. Did I never tell you about him from school?”

  “His name sounds familiar, but I can’t remember. Was he on that photo you had on the wall when we were at uni?”

  “Yes, he was the tall one stood behind me.”

  “Wait, the ginger one?”

  “That’s the one, do you remember?”

  “Erm, Jenny, do you remember?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Didn’t you used to tell me that he was obsessed with you? Was always hanging around you, asking you out, tried rigging a game of Spin the Bottle to get you to kiss him?”

  “Erm,” I had forgotten all of that, but it was all coming back to me now. The love notes that kept appearing in my locker, the valentines cards every year, trying to kiss me at parties, and the jealousy when I got a boyfriend. “well, it’s been over a decade, he will have gotten over all that by now surely. Don’t you think?”

  “I don’t know,” she sounded concerned, “how long did he hug you for when he saw you?”