by J. Daniels
“I want to get ice cream too!” Olivia hollered from the couch. “Great idea, Mama!”
Nathan laughed in my ear.
“I should go,” I said quickly. I needed to disconnect this call before Oliver happened to mention how flushed my face had gotten at just the mention of dessert.
Nathan did not need to hear that.
* * *
“Nate! Hey, Mom, it’s Nate and Marley!” Olivia waved out the back window as I pulled into the gravel lot surrounding Arctic Circle. She’d spotted them right away.
“Hey, guys!” Oliver yelled, leaning over as far as his seat belt allowed so he could wave at them too.
I parked in a space on the side of the building, not finding any open ones out front. The kids fled the car as soon as I slowed to a stop, leaving their doors wide open, they were so excited. I’d typically call them back for that, but I understood their eagerness. I hadn’t mentioned anything about meeting up with Nathan today. I thought a surprise would be fun. After cutting the engine, I flipped the visor down and checked my appearance in the mirror.
My cheeks were flushed. My freckles more noticeable than usual, thanks to the recent sun I’d gotten on my face. I hated how prominent they became in the summertime. Freckles were cute on kids, my kids especially, who were both blessed with them. What adult wanted freckles? I didn’t. I was suddenly kicking myself for not applying any makeup before I left the house.
Why the hell didn’t I?
“Mom! Are you coming?”
I quickly finger-combed the ends of my hair before flipping the visor back up. Then I grabbed my wristlet off the passenger seat and slipped my hand through the strap so it dangled. I exited the car, hand on the door ready to shut it but freezing dead-cold when I locked eyes with Nathan over the roof.
Two things halted me.
First, it became very clear that I’d had an audience while I was clearly making a fuss over how I looked for this.
Everyone was gathered no more than ten feet away, watching me. Waiting. And while it wasn’t something I’d typically mind if this had been an obvious date, this wasn’t an obvious date. It wasn’t anything, really. I wasn’t sure whether I should care how I looked right now or not. I didn’t want Nathan thinking I was seeing this as something it wasn’t. What if he acted weird with me now?
The second thing freezing me up: I was completely unprepared for casual Nathan.
I was used to seeing him in work clothes. Slacks and button-up shirts. The occasional tie. Today he was wearing a worn, light-gray T-shirt and loose black running shorts, sneakers instead of dress shoes, no glasses, and a backward hat.
A backward hat? Are you kidding me? I had a major thing for boys in backward hats. They always drew my eye, especially in college. And now I could very easily picture Nathan in college.
He looked younger. Relaxed. He was smiling right at me, not at all acting weird…
I quickly closed all the doors and stepped up onto the patio.
“Mom, how crazy is this?” Oliver asked. “Did you know Nate was going to be here?”
I shook my head, smiling as I walked over. “Small world, right?”
Nathan grinned. He was holding Marley, who was playing peekaboo with Olivia over his shoulder. Both of the girls were giggling.
“Shorty,” Nathan said when I stopped in front of him. I rolled my eyes at the nickname as he looked all over my face. “Nice freckles.”
Oh God. I scrunched up my nose. “Yeah, right.” I laughed.
“What?”
I rubbed at my cheeks, like that action was actually going to erase them or something. “They’re so noticeable right now.”
“I know. I’m noticing them.” He smiled at me.
I stared back, not smiling and not at all knowing what to say in response. I didn’t want him noticing my freckles, did I? Now I wasn’t so sure.
Olivia moved away, most likely in search of her brother, who’d run around the building when I reached the group, and Marley turned her head and finally spotted me. Immediately, her little arms reached out as her body tipped forward, trying to get closer.
“Jenna!” she squealed.
“Hi, pretty girl. I missed you.” I kissed her smiling cheek as I hugged her, then shifted her weight to the crook of my arm. “Oh my goodness, look at your outfit.” I rubbed the tulle of her dress-up skirt between my fingers. It was light blue and sparkled in the sun. Underneath it, she wore a yellow polka-dot bathing suit. There were streaks of sunscreen on her shoulders and chest. “You look so fancy. Did you dress yourself today?”
“Daddy, no shush,” she said, leaning over to grab at her sandal. She tugged at the strap with a grunt.
“Yeah, that was a battle,” Nathan said. “I thought I was going to have to tape them to her feet.”
I got Marley’s attention on the necklace I was wearing. I knew she liked playing with it.
“Let’s leave those on. You might want to walk around a little.”
Distracted, Marley plucked at the gold chain. It was then I noticed her hot-pink fingers.
“And you painted your nails today. Wow.” I giggled.
The polish coated her nails and most of the skin around them. Drops had dripped onto the underside of her fingers as well.
“Yeah, that was me.”
I looked up at Nathan, laughing when he showed me the splashes of polish on his own hand. “First time?” I asked.
“Is it that obvious?”
“Only a little.”
“This stuff is like tar. I’ve been picking it off for two hours.” He scratched at the side of his hand.
“Hey, we’re up!” Oliver yelled, peering around the side of the building. He waved us over, saying, “Come on, guys. It’s our turn.”
Nathan stepped back and held his arm out for me to go ahead. When I made it over to the window, Oliver ordered his soft-serve chocolate cone with sprinkles and Olivia did the same. They always mimicked each other. I ordered a small vanilla in a cup. Just as I was slipping my wristlet off my hand to pay, Nathan stepped up behind the kids.
“I got it,” he said, pulling out his wallet.
I smiled at him. “Thank you.” That was nice of him to treat us.
He told the young girl working that we were all together and ordered himself a medium chocolate with sprinkles.
“Guys.” I tipped my head at Nathan once I had Oliver’s and Olivia’s attention off their cones.
“Thanks, Nate,” they said in unison.
“Yeah, no problem.” Nathan paid for our order, then tucked his wallet away before grabbing both our cups.
“Are you ready to eat some ice cream?” I asked Marley as I followed behind the twins to the picnic tables in the grass.
She nodded slowly. “Wif spinkles.”
Oliver and Olivia sat across from each other at the end of a vacant table. I put Marley on her feet, figuring she’d want to sit beside Nathan since he had her ice cream, and took a seat on Oliver’s side. Then I slid down when Marley squeezed herself in between us.
“O’ver, you got spinkles too?” Marley asked.
Oliver sighed and scooted to the very edge of the bench, putting some space between them. “Yes. I have sprinkles.”
Marley jumped down, eliminated that space he’d just created, then climbed on the bench again. She sat backward, swinging her legs in the air, and watched him lick his cone like it was the most interesting thing she’d ever witnessed.
“O’ver, I have some?”
“Mom.” He groaned.
“Marley, come over here if you want your ice cream.” Nathan sat down across from me so he was straddling the bench and facing Olivia. He handed over my cup, then spooned a bite of chocolate soft serve, holding it over the table. “Do you want this?”
Marley jumped down and ran around the table. She let Nathan feed her a bite, chewed it up, and started the retreat back over to Oliver, but changed her mind halfway and went back for more. Nathan took bites for himself in betwee
n hers. I thought it was cute how they shared.
And how he’d let her dress herself today.
And painting her nails…that wasn’t only cute. It was really, really sweet.
We were all mainly quiet while we ate, most of the noise coming from Marley when she’d ask for another bite and Olivia when she’d comment on how adorable Marley’s little voice was. I got up and grabbed a stack of napkins when my kids were finished, and then I cleaned Marley off before she took off running after Oliver. Olivia led the way. The three of them chased one another in the grass, jumping over wishing flowers.
“I went through the rest of the boxes today. That’s where I got the polish,” Nathan told me when it was just us seated. He waited until I looked over at him before continuing. “I’m keeping a lot of it. I just…I feel like Marley should have a say in what stays. She might want all of it. I don’t know.”
I nodded. “I think it’s better to keep it than regret getting rid of stuff if she asks for it later on. You might not be able to get it back.”
“That’s what I was thinking. I moved everything to the basement for now.” He dropped his spoon into the empty cup, wiped at his mouth, then adjusted the hat, pulling it off and resituating it backward.
“You look so different today,” I said.
He stared at me. “Different how?”
“Like snuggly.” My eyes widened as amusement flared in his. “I mean, cuddly. Comfy. Comfy…not any other word I just said. I meant comfy.” I cleared my throat, turned away, and watched Marley chase Oliver in a circle. Nathan laughed.
“Oh my God,” I whispered, shaking my head at myself. I slowly looked over at him again, hiding half of my face behind my hand. I peered at him between my fingers. “Leave me alone.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever been called snuggly before.” He slowly grinned. “Or cuddly.”
“I meant comfy.” I let my hand fall to the wood. “You know, casual. You always wear business clothes. Give me a break. The hat is really throwing me right now.”
“What’s wrong with my hat?”
“There’s nothing wrong with your hat.” That’s the problem.
“Then why is it throwing you?”
“I’m just not used to seeing you in one. You look like you’re in a frat or something.”
“Well, I was in a frat. Is that a bad thing?”
Goddamn it. I did not need that visual. I was struggling enough as it was. “A bad thing? No. Nononono. God, no…”
When laughter burst out of Nathan’s mouth, I pinched my lips shut and trapped any further response I was about to give. Dear God, bury me right here. I needed to get a handle on myself. I needed to quit picturing Nathan at college.
“So, is that a no, then, Jenna?” he teased.
My phone beeped from my wristlet. Thank you, distraction. Way to be hella late though.
Before offering up unnecessary confirmation, I capitalized on this interruption, tugging my purse in front of me and pulling out my cell. It was another text from CupidMatch guy.
Shit. I’d forgotten to write him back earlier.
Whats up? You free this weekend?
My thumbs moved swiftly over the screen. I wanted to be done with this.
Sorry. I’m not really interested anymore. Take care.
I sent my response, then lifted my head and risked a glance at Nathan.
He was looking out at the kids now, mouth twitching as their adorable laughter filled the air. I wanted to sit here and watch him observe them for hours. The way he studied them like being given the opportunity to do so meant something…I knew how sweet our kids looked playing together. I wanted him familiar with it too, and I wanted to witness the moment this became a memory for him.
“They get along really well,” he said.
I nodded, set my phone on the wood, and peered over at the three of them. “They do. I love watching them together.”
“Marley asked about them today.”
“Aw, really?” We locked eyes, and Nathan nodded. “Mine were wondering what she was doing right before you and I spoke on the phone. Oliver knew it was her nap time. It was really sweet.”
“Marley asked about you too.”
My heart melted hearing that.
“I missed her so much today,” I revealed, laughing a little at myself. “You’d think I hadn’t seen her in weeks. I don’t know what I’m going to do when summer is over.”
Nathan held my eyes for a moment, then looked down at the wood. He picked at the edge of a splintering piece. “You could always come around. I’m sure she’ll want to see you.”
“I’d really like that.” I smiled at him when he glanced up, then palmed my phone again when it beeped. I flipped it over and slid my thumb across the screen to open up the conversation. “One second,” I told him.
“Sure.”
A picture of a dick downloaded instantly, along with the caption Still not interested?
“Oh my God! What the—” I turned my phone facedown on the table and trapped a curse inside my mouth. “Oh my God,” I repeated through clenched teeth, covering my face with both hands.
“You okay?” Nathan asked.
I shook my head, pulled my hands back to look at him, and immediately began fanning my face. I felt like I was burning up.
“No, I am not okay. I just…” How do I explain this? God, I didn’t even want to. I covered my face again and lowered my head, groaning against my palms.
What the hell? This is so weird and embarrassing!
I felt the table move underneath me and seconds later, Nathan’s hold on my wrist.
“Hey.” He pulled my hands away from my face and forced me to look at him.
We were sitting so close now, our hips almost touched.
“What’s going on? You’re freaking out.”
“I am freaked out. That’s exactly what I am.” I grabbed my phone and held it against my stomach so he couldn’t see the screen. “This…jerk just sent me a picture of his, you know, without me asking for it. He just sent it.”
Nathan’s brows raised. “He sent you a dick pic?”
“Yes. And I would never ask for something like that. Never. My God, what if my kids were standing right here? They’re next to me all the time when I’m doing stuff on my phone.” I rushed in a deep breath. I could feel myself shaking. “They could’ve seen that, Nathan. Who sends stuff like that? What if Olivia had seen that text?” My stomach turned over and knotted at the thought. “Oh my God,” I mumbled.
Nathan reacted to that possibility as well. His nostrils flared, and the sharp angle of his jaw twitched. I could suddenly hear his breaths.
“Who is this guy?” he asked. “Do you know him?”
I shook my head, then tipped it side to side. “Sort of. Not really.” I winced. “God, this is not something I’ve told people about.”
Nathan’s expression wiped clean of reaction. “I have absolutely no idea where this conversation is going.”
That made me laugh a little. “It’s not, like, weird or anything. I met him on a dating app. We were supposed to go out the other day, until he found out I had kids and expressed how he wasn’t looking for anything besides a hookup. I backed out immediately. Then he asked me out again today for this weekend, and I just told him a minute ago I wasn’t interested anymore. The dick pic was to change my mind.”
Nathan held out his hand.
I realized what he was asking for and blinked at him. I didn’t move. “You…want to see it?” I asked slowly.
“That is the last thing I want, trust me.” He gestured for the phone again, and when I handed it over, he stood with it and moved away from the seating area until there wasn’t anyone within twenty feet of him. With his back to me, Nathan pressed the phone to his ear.
Is he calling that guy? Holy shit. What was he going to say?
Oliver ran over to me, asking, “Mom, can we play Putt-Putt? We all want to play. Even Marley.”
“Um, we’ll have to see
,” I answered, keeping my eyes on Nathan. I squinted at the back of his head and listened as best as I could, but he was too far away to hear.
“See what?” Oliver questioned.
“I don’t know what their plans are after this.”
“Oh, okay. Let us know when you find out. We’re playing chase.” Oliver hurried away again.
I watched Nathan grip the back of his neck, then pull the phone away from his ear and end the call. He stalked back over to the table, looking more like a pissed-off frat boy now than the playful one I just ate ice cream with.
His face was hard, shoulders drawn back. He appeared larger somehow.
“Here. He shouldn’t contact you anymore, but I would still block his number.” He returned my phone, then sat backward on the bench seat next to me. There was more space between us now.
I secretly hated it.
“Good thinking,” I said.
I pulled up my settings and prevented this loser from sending me anything else. Then I went to my messages and erased our entire conversation.
“God, I can’t believe he did that. What a creep.”
Nathan was pitched forward, elbows resting on his knees as he watched the kids run around the field. He turned his head to look at me after I put my phone away.
“What did you say to him?” I asked.
His shoulders jerked. “I just told him off. Then I made it really fucking clear you weren’t interested. I don’t think he’ll have the balls to send you anything else, but I feel better knowing he can’t.”
I smiled, liking how he cared about this. He didn’t have to. “Thank you for doing that.”
“You don’t need to thank me.” Nathan cracked his knuckles and stared out at the kids again. Just as I turned my head to do the same, he asked, “Are you still on that dating app?”
“God, no.” I laughed. “I was striking out big-time on that thing. I’m done with it.”
“You’re done with dating?”
Our gazes locked when I looked over at him again. His dark eyes were serious.
“No, I mean, the app…I erased it.”
Oliver rushed over before anything else could be said about dating apps, dating, Nathan’s views on the subject…Was he even open to dating yet? I had no idea and was robbed of the opportunity to ask. My son was currently hollering in my face.
