by Mark Twain
THE JUMPING FROG [written about 1865]
IN ENGLISH. THEN IN FRENCH. THEN CLAWED BACK INTO A CIVILIZED LANGUAGEONCE MORE BY PATIENT, UNREMUNERATED TOIL.
Even a criminal is entitled to fair play; and certainly when a man whohas done no harm has been unjustly treated, he is privileged to do hisbest to right himself. My attention has just been called to an articlesome three years old in a French Magazine entitled, 'Revue des DeuxMondes' (Review of Some Two Worlds), wherein the writer treats of "LesHumoristes Americaines" (These Humorists Americans). I am one of thesehumorists American dissected by him, and hence the complaint I am making.
This gentleman's article is an able one (as articles go, in the French,where they always tangle up everything to that degree that when you startinto a sentence you never know whether you are going to come out alive ornot). It is a very good article and the writer says all manner of kindand complimentary things about me--for which I am sure I thank him with allmy heart; but then why should he go and spoil all his praise by oneunlucky experiment? What I refer to is this: he says my Jumping Frog isa funny story, but still he can't see why it should ever really convulseany one with laughter--and straightway proceeds to translate it intoFrench in order to prove to his nation that there is nothing so veryextravagantly funny about it. Just there is where my complaintoriginates. He has not translated it at all; he has simply mixed it allup; it is no more like the Jumping Frog when he gets through with it thanI am like a meridian of longitude. But my mere assertion is not proof;wherefore I print the French version, that all may see that I do notspeak falsely; furthermore, in order that even the unlettered may know myinjury and give me their compassion, I have been at infinite pains andtrouble to retranslate this French version back into English; and to tellthe truth I have well-nigh worn myself out at it, having scarcely restedfrom my work during five days and nights. I cannot speak the Frenchlanguage, but I can translate very well, though not fast, I beingself-educated. I ask the reader to run his eye over the original Englishversion of the Jumping Frog, and then read the French or myretranslation, and kindly take notice how the Frenchman has riddled thegrammar. I think it is the worst I ever saw; and yet the French arecalled a polished nation. If I had a boy that put sentences together asthey do, I would polish him to some purpose. Without furtherintroduction, the Jumping Frog, as I originally wrote it, was as follows[after it will be found the French version, and after the latter myretranslation from the French]
