by Gareth Otton
“No, you don’t get to demand anything after attacking my character like that. I don’t even know you.”
“Well in that case, I don’t have to—” Amber started to say as she turned away, but Tony grabbed her again. This time he was ready when she tried to pull away and he focused on his supernatural strength to keep his grip. “Let me go.”
“I’m done playing nice. I want answers. What do you want with me?’
“I don’t want anything from you,” she snapped, tugging harder on her arm and this time pulling free. She didn’t leave though as his expression made it clear he wouldn’t let her just yet. “I thought I did, but you’ve proved I was wrong.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” When she didn’t answer he added, “You might as well tell me because I’m not letting you go until I know more. This is the least you owe me after the way you’ve been behaving.”
She laughed at that.
“What’s so funny?” he asked.
“You are. The fact you think my behaviour is bad when you act like you do.”
Tony’s eyes narrowed as his anger genuinely got out of control. Raising a finger that was shaking with rage, he said, “You don’t know me. You have no idea what my life is like, what I have been through, or what I do with my time. You’ve followed me and made snap judgements, but you’ve already proved you don’t know half of what you think. Stop behaving like you’re some kind of saint when you’re the one who's been stalking me and—”
“I haven’t been stalking you,” she snapped, but he could tell her heart wasn’t in it. She was just replying with harsh words as his own words hit home.
“You’ve been following me around after I asked you to stop. I’d call that stalking. And you call me a freak.” He forced a laugh and she flinched from the sound.
“I’m not stalking you,” she said in a weaker tone as she fought back tears.
Stay strong, Tony. Don’t let her cry her way out of this.
“Then now’s your chance to explain yourself. For the last time. Why are you following me?”
“Because I wanted to know what kind of person you really are.”
“Why?”
She hesitated, not wanting to answer but also knowing he wouldn’t give her a choice. It was at this point that the tears started flowing and he had to force himself to maintain his anger and stay strong. As expected, part of him wanted to back off, hating himself for making her cry.
“Because I needed your help, alright? I needed to know if you were the kind of person who could actually help me, or if you are just the creep the whole world thinks you are. I guess I got my answer.”
It was Tony’s turn to flinch. She was trying to hurt him, but there was truth there as well. His reputation wasn’t as good as it could be as people shared stories about his past, and she wasn’t wrong about how the world saw him. He didn’t think it bothered him until now. However, he was done with being judged and he thought he’d made that clear.
“For the last time, you don’t know a damn thing about me,” he snapped. “So I went to a strip club and visited places to watch attractive people in skimpy clothing. Who cares? You’ve been a ghost for ten minutes and you think you know what it’s like. I was fourteen when I died and I’ve been that age for sixteen years. You have no idea what it’s like to see everyone you know grow around you while you stay still, to watch them act on the biological urges I still feel by the way, to get girlfriends, to eventually marry, have kids. Some people I went to school with have children who are nearly as old as I was when I died, but I’m still here, stuck in the past. Tad was two years younger than me when I died, yet now he’s adopted a nearly thirteen-year-old daughter and is going out with the hottest woman on the planet. And worst of all, because I’ve lived in his head, I know exactly what all that was like. They say you can’t miss what you never had, well those people have never lived in a Proxy’s head for sixteen years. So you know what? Sue me for now and then wanting a taste of what I missed out on.”
Amber stared at him, eyes wide and mouth open in surprise. She had nothing to say in response and he had nothing left to say to her. He hadn’t meant to reveal all that and suddenly he felt worse about himself than ever. This was a mistake. He should have let her go.
He turned and walked away, leaving her slack jawed behind him. He got only a few steps before suddenly he heard frantic footsteps as she hurried to catch up.
“Wait,” she called. When he didn’t answer, it was her turn to grab his arm. “Please, wait.”
Shaking her off, he spun to face her. “What?”
“I… I didn’t know any of that. No one does.”
“So what? Everyone has a history. You should think about that before judging people.”
Again she flinched, but she was also nodding.
“You’re right,” she said. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have… I mean… Look, I didn’t know any of that. And you’re right, it changes things. I had no right to judge you and…”
Her words trailed off as she struggled to articulate her thoughts. New tears formed, maybe from frustration this time, and Tony rolled his eyes as those tears sapped the last of his anger.
Damn. Why do tears get to me like this every time?
“Tony, please? I need your help. I’ve been trying so hard to deal with this on my own, but I just can’t do it anymore. I’m sorry, okay? I should have come at this differently, but… Please. I just need your help.”
“If you need a Proxy, I can’t help you. I’m currently looking for a new one myself.”
“What? You are? What happ… Never mind. No, that’s not what I want. I need help with something else,” she said. “Can you… Uh… Can I show you something?”
“Show me what?”
“I can’t explain. Please, just come with me.”
He hesitated, not sure he wanted to follow her anywhere. However, now his tirade was done and his anger had bled away, he was left with only his curiosity about why she’d been following him for so long. Despite himself, he was intrigued with what had driven her to this.
After a long moment of indecision, he nodded his ascent and told her to lead on.
They didn’t speak as Amber led Tony through Cardiff, even when she guided them onto a train that took them toward Bridgend. They departed at the third stop and she led Tony down a series of streets, twists and turns until he was hopelessly lost. He was tempted to ask where they were going, but his curiosity was distraction enough to keep the nagging pull of Dream away, so he let it slide. Amber took every turn with confidence and kept up a pace that only a ghost could follow.
Finally she stopped outside a newly built house at the entrance of a large estate under development. It was a three-bedroom show home, a mixture of brick and white plaster with faux-wood PVC windows and a two-car garage. As with most show homes, it was tastefully decorated.
“You want my help buying a house?” Tony asked.
Amber didn’t answer other than to frown as she mulled something over in her head. Still without speaking, she came to a decision and walked up to the door to try the handle. It was locked, which strangely seemed to please the girl. Her shoulders relaxed as she let go of some tension Tony hadn’t realised she was carrying, then she stepped through the door like it wasn’t there.
Tony was impressed. Just a few days ago she couldn’t do that. Embracing his own ghostly nature, he followed her.
The inside of the house was as pristine as outside. Picture frames hung from off-white walls, there was a long rug in the hallway atop the faux-wood floor, and the cream carpet running up the stairs was brand new. The house smelled of furniture polish and air fresheners, but the air was stale, regardless. Tony doubted anyone had been through here in a while.
“What are we doing here?” he asked.
Again Amber didn’t answer, but turned her attention to the top of the stairs.
“Guys, it’s me. I’ve brought a friend. You can come out now.”
Tony
flinched as Amber shouted, then waited without breathing to see what would happen next. The lack of air didn’t bother him, which was good because it was nearly a minute before Tony saw movement at the top of the stairs.
A small head covered in blonde hair, tied into pigtails, peaked from behind the banister. Wide green eyes found Tony’s, and the girl shied away before spotting Amber.
“Amber,” she squealed, suddenly rushing down the stairs so fast Tony was sure she would trip. She couldn’t have been older than four and her legs were too short to navigate the steps so quickly. However, somehow her socked feet found the sweet spot of each step and no matter how much she wobbled, she never fell. At least, not until the last step. By that point Amber was there to catch her and pull her into a hug.
Tony blinked in surprise. This was not at all what he expected.
He was so surprised that it took him a few seconds to register there were more footsteps on the stairs.
Another girl, taller and wider, with dark hair and a similar t-shirt and jeans combo was coming down the steps a little more carefully. What looked to be a six-year-old carbon copy of her, albeit with considerably shorter hair and more masculinity, was one step behind her. Both had eyes only for Amber and their grins were identical.
They too threw themselves at the teenage ghost, clearing the way for one last child. This boy was older than the others, but only by a couple of years. A nest of ginger hair sat atop a pale, lean face that was consumed by freckles. Hazel eyes narrowed as he stared at Tony.
“Who’s this?” the boy asked, drawing Amber’s attention from the trio of children hanging from her. After forty minutes of stony silence, Tony was surprised to find a wide smile on her face. He was sure it was for the children’s sake, but it was pleasant to see its return. In the short time he’d known her, Tony discovered that her smile transformed her whole appearance.
“Everyone, this is my new friend, Tony. He’s here to help,” she said, throwing him under the bus. “Tony, this is Georgia,” she said, tapping the little blonde girl on the head. “The twins, Millie and Vincent. And this is Andrew,” she finished, nodding toward the boy who waited on the last step.
“Help us how?” Andrew asked, looking directly at Tony.
“That’s what he’s here to discuss,” Amber said, separating herself from the children so she could speak to Andrew directly. She glanced at Tony and he didn’t like the brief flash of nerves in her expression. “Basically, he’s here to keep us safe. Aren’t you, Tony?”
When the impact of what she said hit him, her anxious expression suddenly made sense. She’d backed him into a corner and he had no idea how to respond.
He was suddenly very aware of all four children staring and waiting for his answer. It was amazing that after not needing to drink for sixteen years, his mouth could suddenly feel so dry. He had no idea what they needed to be kept safe from and had not agreed to help. However, he recognised the truth behind her gamble. She was betting everything on him being more likely to not want to disappoint these children than walk away without getting tangled in their troubles.
Damn her for getting to know him so quickly.
Sighing as the trap closed, he nodded. “Of course, why else would I be here?”
Not sold on his answer, Andrew continued to frown. The three younger children were a different matter. As one they cheered, no doubt urged on by Amber’s sudden, winning grin, and then they rushed Tony for a group hug. He almost fled in panic, but they were on him before he could act and he was left awkwardly hugging them back as Amber’s eyes sparkled with mirth.
Check mate, her expressions said.
With another sigh, Tony gave in to defeat.
“They’re all ghosts,” Tony pointed out when he was alone with Amber again, sitting around the kitchen table and glancing into the living room where the children played.
The smallest were concentrating on some toys they’d fetched from upstairs while Andrew played on a PlayStation he’d connected to the show home’s TV. He wasn’t concentrating on his game though, because whenever he thought Tony wasn’t watching he looked at him with an evil frown.
“I thought that was obvious,” Amber replied, a touch of snark in her voice. Her confidence had returned, though she also wasn’t pushing her luck. When Tony frowned, she quickly elaborated on her statement. “They’re lost ghosts.”
“Lost ghosts? What does that make you, Peter Pan? Or is it Wendy?”
“Ha ha. Very funny. You know what I mean. They’re scared kids without a home. I found Andrew first. I’d only been a ghost a week and wasn’t sure what to do with myself when I stumbled across him outside a school where I used to live. He was being chased off by one of the teachers. Can you believe that? He was only looking for help so he could find his way home, but those arseholes wanted nothing to do with him just because he was a ghost.”
Tony couldn’t comment as he struggled with that statement. A school wouldn’t help a child? It didn’t make sense to him.
“Georgia was next. I found her outside the Borderlands. Me and Andrew were trying to locate his grandparents, but we didn’t have much luck. He’s a bit too young to remember where they lived as he hadn’t lived with them long. Anyway, we found Georgia just wandering the streets. She died in a car accident a long way from home and had been on her own for weeks. She’d made a den in a playhouse of a nearby park and she watched the kids play every day, trying to get them to see her. But she was outside the Borderlands, so no luck. The poor girl was half mad when we found her.
“With Andrew and Georgia with me, I headed back to the Borderlands. I barely knew what to do when it was just me and Andrew, but now I had Georgia and I was seriously out of my depth. So I came here so I could at least talk to people again. I figured I’d speak with the police, see if they could help.”
She paused long enough that Tony felt compelled to ask, “And that didn’t go well?”
She frowned in a way Stella did at times, like she was rooting around his thoughts for information. He shifted uncomfortably until she asked a question of her own. “You haven’t seen much of how they hate us, have you?”
“Uh… What? Who hates you?”
“Everyone. The whole world hates ghosts, Tony. I imagine you’ve been sheltered from it because of who you spend your time with, but the rest of us…” She paused again, struggling to find the words. “Even in the Borderlands, it doesn’t take long for people to realise we aren’t alive. I don’t know what it is about us, but you can see in their faces the moment they realise what we are. Some people just go pale and try to get away, others get angry and lash out.”
“Why?” Tony asked, not at all familiar with this experience.
“I don’t know. You’ll have to ask them,” Amber snapped, suddenly angry. “Just go up to the first person you see in the street and start talking to them. See how long it takes them to realise you’re a ghost and see what their reaction is.”
“Whoa, calm down,” Tony said, raising his hands and pointedly looking into the other room where the children had all looked up at Amber’s harsh words. Her expression changed in an instant as a convincing fake smile found its way to her face.
“Sorry,” she said after a pause. “I didn’t mean to snap. It’s just… It’s not been easy. First, I have to deal with the fact that I’m dead, which is bad enough. Then there’s all this hate and…” Again her words trailed off and she paused once more to collect her thoughts.
“I went to the police,” she said. “I explained who I was, told them about the kids and asked them what to do. It turns out we weren’t the first kids to come to them looking for help. They said there was a system set up for us and they’d look into it. They just needed our names. I knew from the start that something was wrong with them though. They were helping us, but none seemed happy about it. They told us it could take a while to figure everything out and in the meantime we’d have to wait with the others.”
“The others?” Tony asked.
> “Millie and Vincent,” Amber said. “We were lead to the holding cells. They opened one of the doors to this tiny room and they told us to wait inside. When I got in there, I found Millie and Vincent, huddled together and terrified on this tiny bed. No sooner were we inside when they freaking locked us in, like we were criminals or something.”
“What?” Tony asked, not quite believing her. “Why would they do that?”
“Because they hate us. They may be forced to help us, but until they can get us where we need to go they want nothing to do with us. So they locked us in that tiny cell. Poor Millie and Vincent had been there for days. They’d given them toys to occupy them, but other than that they left those kids on their own.”
“I don’t believe it,” Tony muttered.
“Well, I’m not making this up,” Amber snapped.
“I know, sorry. I didn’t mean it that way. I’m just stunned. I had no idea people treated ghosts like this. I don’t… Why?”
“How the hell should I know? Maybe we scare them. Remind them they’re all going to be one of us one day. Who knows? Whatever the case, I ended up shut away in a tiny room with four scared children like we were some kind of dirty secret to be locked up and forgotten. We didn’t stay long.”
“You escaped?” Tony asked, recognising her tone and engrossed in her story.
“We escaped,” Amber agreed. “I wasn’t going to leave those kids like that, and I certainly wasn’t going to stay locked up. So I practiced going invisible. I’d seen you do it on TV, so I knew it could be done. I turned it into a game for the kids, getting them to practice with it until we could figure out how to get it working. It turns out the kids were quicker to pick it up than me, though they needed to see me do it once to know what I was asking of them.
“Once we could all go invisible, we made our escape and went looking for a place to live temporarily. That’s when we found this place,” she motioned around her at the house they were in. “There’s more than enough space here, it’s furnished like a nice family home, and it’s somewhere we won’t be bothered by people too often. The kids hide in the attic whenever anyone is shown around, but otherwise we’re safe enough here. Safe enough that I can leave them while I go find help.”
