Lilian made Frieda a coffee. “You can’t let Guild or those like him put you off, Frieda. You were born to be a doctor.”
“He suggested I follow your profession.”
“He would. He believes nurses are little more than skivvies to run around after the doctors. Many share that view, but I’ll change it, one person at a time. I aim to educate New York and the whole of this country on the benefits of employing nurses as professionals.”
“I think you have achieved a lot already, Lilian.”
“What I have or haven’t achieved is neither here nor there. What will you do?” Lilian pierced her with a look.
“He’s agreed to let me stay in the hospital until I qualify. But there aren’t any suitable positions available for me at the hospital.”
“That’s their loss. So why do you look so stricken? It’s not the news you wanted, but you can still qualify. Can’t you?”
“I don’t know how much impact not having experience in Obstetrics will hinder my qualification. How can I work with pregnant women without experience?”
“You can gain experience at any of the hospitals.”
“They won’t be willing to take me on without practical training experience, will they? It’s hard enough to get them to accept a female doctor.”
“Now Frieda, if life was easy it wouldn’t be worth living would it? You need to dust yourself down, my dear, and get back in the fight. Until all men and women agree to equality between our sexes, the fight will never end.”
Frieda didn’t have the energy to agree or disagree. She was sick of fighting against the world. She was too tired.
“Go home, Frieda, and get some rest. You’ve been working too hard, here and at the hospital on top of your studying. Take some time to yourself. There is always another route to achieving your goals. You are not without friends, and I know they, like me, will do everything we can to help you achieve your dream. You were born to be a doctor, Frieda. Don’t let anyone, especially that puffed up, self-important old goose, steal it away from you.”
Frieda couldn’t answer, her throat swollen with tears. She was lucky. She had the best friends in the entire world.
Chapter 3
Frieda did as Lilian suggested, and went home to rest and recover her fighting spirit. She opened the front door quietly, and escaped to her bedroom, meeting no one. There she had a little cry in private.
“Frieda, are you up there? Patrick came to visit.”
Frieda heard Kathleen calling her and sat up. What was Patrick doing here? It was dark outside. How long had she been sleeping?
She’d fallen asleep fully clothed. Glancing in the mirror, she groaned. She looked a mess.
“Coming!” she shouted back as she pulled off her dress, changing into one that looked a little better. It could do with an iron, but she didn’t have the luxury of time. She ran a brush through her hair and decided she would get it cut off. It was time to be more practical.
Picking up the shirt of her dress to free her ankles, she ran down the stairs, pausing on the last landing to slow her pace. She didn’t want to look too eager to see him. She heard him laughing; he was in the sitting room with his mother. She could hear other voices, too, but couldn’t tell who it was.
Pushing the door open, she walked inside and almost collided with Patrick.
“Frieda, I was worried when I found you’d left the hospital early. Are you feeling alright?”
“Fine, thank you. Evening everyone.” Frieda glanced around, only spotting Richard Green as she did so. “Dr. Green, sorry I didn’t expect you to be here.”
“I met Guild. I figured he’d upset you. I thought we could come and offer a show of support.”
“Why would he upset Frieda? What haven’t you told me, Dad?” Patrick asked, but his gaze never left Frieda’s face.
“Not my place to say anything, Patrick.”
Frieda heard the slight note of censure in Dr. Green’s voice. He rarely corrected anyone publicly. She looked up to find Kathleen staring at her, her eyes lit up with concern.
“Frieda, do you feel up to talking about what happened?” Dr. Green asked.
“Nothing much to say, really. Dr. Guild doesn’t believe I have what it takes to be a doctor, nothing will change his mind, and he suggested I take a leaf out of Lilian’s book and become a nurse.”
Patrick turned on his father, “I thought you said the hospital had guaranteed Frieda would qualify as a doctor so long as she passed her exams. She kept her end of the bargain so why aren’t they?”
Frieda quickly intervened, although it was nice to hear Patrick’s support. “Patrick, it’s not your dad’s fault. He’s done nothing but try to help me.”
“It might be partially my fault, Frieda. Dr. Guild is no fan of mine and he may take his feelings out on you. I’m sorry if that’s the case.”
“Never be sorry, Dr. Green. You, Kathleen, and Lily helped me achieve more than I ever dreamed possible. I wouldn’t be even partially qualified if not for you. I would be a seamstress working in a sweatshop somewhere. Or married with five children.”
“You want five children?” Patrick blurted out, as his cheeks burned crimson.
Frieda wished the ground would open under her feet as she stared at Patrick. Kathleen broke the awkward silence.
“Frieda, my poor girl. What a day you’ve had. Why didn’t you come and find me? Lily has been home all day with a cold, but I’ve been here since lunch. I just assumed you were at the hospital or with Lilian.”
“I went to see Lilian to tell her.” At the hurt look on Kathleen’s face, Frieda hurried to explain. “Lilian helped me get some experience in Obstetrics. I think she bullied some friends of hers to let me watch them as they assisted women give birth, including in one case, by section. She also wrote a long reference to support my application. So I felt obliged to tell her. She thought, and I agreed, I could help the Henry Street Clinic even more when I had some experience in Obstetrics.”
“Guild is a silly old -- ”
“Richard!” Kathleen intervened quickly.
“Pompous fool,” Richard finished. “I will speak to the board. This is far from being over.”
“Please don’t do that. Dr. Guild is a formidable enemy, and I know you need more funding for your work in the burns unit. Dr. Green --”
“I wish you would call me Richard, Frieda. At least outside the hospital.”
“Richard,” Freida smiled, “I really do appreciate everything you’ve done, but Dr. Guild is a lost cause. Even if we got him to overturn his decision, which is doubtful, he will make me pay. He could also stand in the way of your funding requests, or make life difficult for Patrick. That’s not a risk I’m willing to take.”
Patrick protested, “I can fight my own battles, Frieda.”
“Son, this is not about you.” Richard turned his attention back to Frieda. “So what are your plans?”
“First, I need to find out if I can qualify without spending time in the Obstetrics ward. If I can’t, then I need experience in another hospital. I could do that on a volunteer basis, perhaps.”
Looking pensive, Richard said, “Good idea. Lilian and I have, between us, plenty of friends in the field. We should be able to help you.”
“Frieda, you are following a well tread path.” Kathleen added, “Just the other day I was reading about Elizabeth Garrett Anderson, an English doctor. She was so determined to become a doctor, she studied French and qualified in Paris. She then returned to England where she has set up a women’s hospital in London. I believe she still works there. She appointed our own Elizabeth Blackwell, God rest her soul, as Professor of Gynecology. Those two women and others in their field are inspirational. Things may not have changed enough, but they have improved since they first wanted to become doctors. At least you don’t have to leave your home or set up your own hospital.”
“Although moving to London to work with Dr. Blackwell could be fun,” Patrick suggested, making his parents laugh. Frieda wondered
what he meant. Was it a hint for her to consider a future abroad?
Richard changed the subject, “Frieda, are you hungry? I’m starving and I would like to treat my family to a meal.”
She felt Patrick looking at her. Family, that’s what he thought she was too. Despite being ravenous, she shook her head. “Thank you, Richard but I ate earlier. I’m exhausted and am on shift later.”
“Please, Frieda, come with us. It’s been ages since we went out as a family.”
Patrick’s words increased the pain in her heart. “No, but thank you.”
Kathleen stepped forward, kissing her on the cheek. “Sleep well, darling; tomorrow will be better. Just wait until Lily hears about this. She’s bound to have an opinion or two.”
Everyone laughed before Frieda gratefully made her escape.
Chapter 4
Freida walked into the hospital canteen the following Monday morning to grab a coffee. She yawned as the busy night on the wards caught up with her. When she pushed the door open, she could have groaned out loud. It was too late to close it as she’d been seen by a number of her fellow medical students.
She forced a smile when Martin Caldwell was the first to acknowledge her. He normally pretended she didn’t exist.
“Morning, Frieda, we were partying at my place yesterday. Drank too much of the old man’s champagne. We need some fine doctoring this morning, don’t we?” He looked at his friends, some of them laughed but some, she noticed, had the grace to look uncomfortable. “We all have serious headaches.”
“Plenty of water and some aspirin will cure you.” Frieda responded, trying to keep the smile fixed in place.
“Aren’t you going to ask what we’re celebrating?”
Frieda waited for him to elaborate. She knew he was baiting her, but she refused to give him the satisfaction of playing his stupid games.
“Got confirmation of our positions, assuming we pass our finals. Isn’t that something?”
“Yes, it certainly is. Congratulations.” She moved away from the group, toward the kettle, but he couldn’t let her go.
“Did you get the position you wanted? Baby ward, wasn’t it?”
She heard the door shut behind her but didn’t turn. What should she say to Caldwell?
“Frieda has another project lined up but I won’t bore you with the details, Caldwell. Dr. Guild has been looking for you since seven.”
She turned at the sound of Patrick’s voice. Caldwell paled, knocked back the coffee and ran. His friends soon dispersed, leaving Frieda alone with Patrick. He moved closer to her, his lovely eyes lit up with pleasure as he looked at her.
“Don’t mind that idiot. He’ll do well to pass his exams with the grades he’s been achieving lately.” He smiled at her, causing her stomach to do a funny flip. The back of her neck grew hot. She didn’t look him in the eyes, not wanting him to see how his presence affected her.
“Why did you do that?” she demanded, angry with him but not knowing why.
“What?” he sounded genuinely confused.
“Interfere like that. Don’t you think it’s bad enough that they all believe I’m only here because of your father, and now you are acting like my protector?” She slammed the cup on the counter, the contents flowing over. Irritated at herself for losing her temper, she looked around for a towel to mop up the mess.
Patrick touched her arm.
“Frieda, what’s gotten into you? I stood up for you just like I’m sure you would for me.”
“You mean the next time you find out you don’t qualify for a job because of your sex?” she retorted. She knew she wasn’t being fair, but she was too frustrated to care. She was a better doctor than Caldwell could ever be. That guy wouldn’t even touch a patient unless they came from a certain class.
“Frieda, that’s uncalled for. I’m not Guild. I don’t make the rules.”
“No, you don’t. But I can fight my own battles, thank you.”
He moved closer to her. She could feel his stare, and when she looked up at him, he looked furious.
“I don’t understand you. I thought friends stuck by one another.”
“I can look after myself, Patrick. I’ve been doing it a long time.”
He gazed at her for a few seconds, before asking, “Have I missed something? ‘Cause you seem to be really fed up with me. I thought you were tired on Friday night, but after this morning, I’m wondering if there’s something I did?”
“I’ve no idea what you are talking about,” she replied stiffly. “Don’t you have somewhere else to be?”
He didn’t take the hint.
“Frieda, on Friday you refused to come to dinner, this morning you jump down my throat, and now you can’t wait to get rid of me. That's not how friends behave.”
“Friends! We’re more like brother and sister according to you. I have somewhere to be. See you later.” She marched off, heart thumping with fury. She had to pass the final exams and then she would shove her results down Caldwell’s throat. Or maybe up his nose.
She couldn’t think about Patrick. He’d made his position clear. She had to forget about her dreams in which they got married and worked together in New York. Maybe it was time to leave. Lilian had offered to give her a reference for the women’s hospital in New York or the one in Pennsylvania. She had also suggested she consider London to get more varied experience. London seemed a bit far to travel, but she might consider getting out of New York. Then she wouldn’t have to see Patrick anymore. If she stayed in the city, even working at another hospital, she could still run into him at the Sanctuary or when she went to visit Elsa. She wasn’t sure she could cope when he started courting someone. It was bad enough to watch the nurses flirting with him. He was rich, talented, and handsome, yet genuine and kind; he could have his pick of women. Why had she ever thought he would consider her?
Chapter 5
The following Saturday afternoon, Frieda waited for Maria to come out of the Triangle. Maria didn’t see her as she walked outside, chatting to a couple of the other seamstresses. How happy she looked, her face a big smile.
“Frieda, you’re early! What’s wrong?”
Frieda smiled at the good-natured teasing about her awful timekeeping, but Maria wasn’t fooled. She tilted her head as she looked at her. “You’re more tired than usual, you have a sad look in your eyes, and that smile couldn’t be more forced than the one I gave Mr. Blanck earlier.”
That did make Frieda laugh. She knew how much Maria and the other women despised the Triangle Shirtwaist Kings as the papers called Blanck and Harris.
Maria put her arm through Frieda’s. “Come on, let’s go to Charlie’s . One of his cakes will help put a smile on your face. Then you can tell me why you look so miserable.”
“I don’t want to ruin your day.”
“Frieda, it can’t be that bad.”
They walked the few blocks to Charlie’s in silence, navigating their way through the packed streets. It was payday and the shoppers were out in full force.
Frieda followed Maria into the small Italian diner. The staff greeted Maria like a long-lost relative, kissing her on both cheeks. Frieda glanced around, the tables were busy with mostly male clientele. Not surprising given the delicious aromas coming from the kitchen. Charlie’s wife, mother, and his daughters all worked in the family business providing Italian home cooked meals to the local community. Like many other nationalities, Italian men came to New York ahead of their families. They worked hard and saved whatever they could to bring their loved ones to America. Charlie’s provided a little touch of home comforts. Somewhere not only to get a decent low priced meal, but to talk of home in the native language.
Frieda slid into the two person booth opposite Maria who ordered for both of them.
“Now tell me what’s wrong?” Maria ordered.
Frieda looked everywhere but at her friend, “Nothing.”
Maria whistled, “That bad?”
Frieda glanced at Maria, swallowing
hard, knowing there was no point in trying to convince Maria there was nothing wrong. “Everything.”
“Start at the beginning. Is it Patrick? Or the hospital?”
“Both. Neither. Maria, who am I fooling? Patrick sees me as his sister and the hospital doesn’t want female doctors. Nobody does. Do you know it was easier to train as a doctor back in the 1890’s than it is now. More of the female colleges are closing but getting a place in medical school is only a start of the challenge. You have to have a job when you graduate and few hospitals want to employ women. Those that do expect you to have experience. But how can I get that when I can’t get a placement on the wards?”
Maria took her hand. “Frieda, slow down. You aren’t making a lot of sense. You’re already in medical school. You haven’t been kicked out have you?”
Frieda shook her head.
“Good. So the fact it’s harder to get in, while not fair, doesn’t apply to you. You haven’t graduated, yet, so why are you worried about finding a job? You know there are loads of places to work as a doctor. This isn’t like you, you’re normally so positive. What happened?”
Frieda told her about the interview with Dr. Guild and the comments of the other medical students.
“It’s so unfair. I scored higher than that idiot Caldwell on every test. He won’t touch a patient who comes in from the tenements. You should see how he treats the children. Yet he’s guaranteed a job. Just because…”
“He’s a man. We know it’s a man’s world, Frieda. That’s why we need women like you to fight back. You knew from the start this wasn’t going to be easy. You’re just overworked and exhausted. When was the last time you took two days off in a row?”
Frieda shrugged her shoulders.
“You can’t work all the time,” Maria lectured.
The coffee and cakes arrived, interrupting them. Maria chatted in Italian to the young server making her laugh. Frieda wished she had some of her younger friend’s optimism. There was a time when she thought she could conquer the world. She knew being a female doctor wasn’t going to be easy, but she thought they would treat her fairly. That was the worst of it.
Orphan Train Disaster Page 2