Rosa wrinkled her nose but shrugged apologetically to Caroline and ran out of the room.
“Is the lady ill?” Caroline asked. “Is there something I might do for her?”
“No, she will come about with a little peace. Don’t we all?”
“I didn’t mean to upset Rosa by drawing attention to your lack of appetite,” she said quickly. “I was thoughtless.”
“Or too thoughtful? Interesting point. My wife died a year ago. Rosa…watches me quite carefully to be sure I don’t follow her to the grave.”
It made sense, although it filled Caroline with a hundred other questions. She opted for, “Are you ill, sir? It would make my position simpler if I knew.”
“But your position isn’t simple. I told you that.”
If it was an attempt to intimidate her to silence, she resisted, holding his gaze as she waited for her answer. After a moment, he let out another short laugh and reached for his glass. “I am convalescing, Miss Grey. Will that suffice? But talking of your position, I need to know your intentions.”
“My intentions?” she repeated blankly. After all, her intentions hadn’t appeared to matter to anyone since yesterday morning. She had been blown around by other people’s until she’d landed here.
“Rosa needs a governess. I hoped she would grow used to the idea of having you here. But it appears she’s taken a liking to you. I refuse to have her feelings hurt if you go running back to Braithwaite.”
A flush of anger rose up from her toes. “Running back to… If I return to Braithwaite Castle, it will be to the ladies Maria, Alice and Helen. And only at Lady Braithwaite’s invitation. Whatever you imagine my relationship with the earl to be, you are wrong!”
His lips curved. “Truly? Then you are his mistress?”
She gasped, jumping to her feet. “I beg your pardon?”
He rose with her, albeit languidly, which brought him a shade too close. But Caroline was far too indignant to back away.
His gaze mocked her relentlessly. “I imagined your relationship to be entirely innocent,” he drawled. “I wouldn’t otherwise have employed you. I’m not much of a moral stickler myself, but even I draw the line at employing a neighbor’s bit of muslin to teach my daughter. You’re very touchy on the subject. Perhaps you harbor a tendre for the earl? He is very handsome.”
“Then perhaps you should be his bit of muslin!” she said furiously.
To her surprise, he threw back his head and laughed. “What a picture! Wouldn’t that set the tongues of Blackhaven wagging with a vengeance? Oh, sit down, Miss Grey,” he added, throwing himself back into his chair. “I impugn neither your honor nor his. Nor do I actually care whether either of you gives a jot for the other. What concerns me is your returning there and leaving Rosa once she has grown to rely upon you.”
Grudgingly, Caroline resumed her own seat. “Lord Braithwaite spoke of a week or so,” she admitted. “By then, he believes his mother’s temper will have calmed and her good sense be restored.” She drew a deep breath. “I believe his lordship to be a just man, offended by his mother’s injustice to me. Besides, he believes me to be a good influence on his younger sister. While I…I value my well-paid position and I am fond of the girls. I am ashamed to say neither of us gave much thought to you or Rosa in these plans.”
She met his gaze with conscious bravery. “If you think it better for Rosa, I will leave tomorrow. I can give you the address of a good agency to find another governess.”
There was a hint of curiosity in his hard eyes. “You would, too, wouldn’t you? Where would you go?”
“I should be grateful for a conveyance to Carlisle. From there I can travel home to my mother’s house north of the border. Lady Braithwaite may reach me there as easily as here.”
“Not quite so easily,” he observed. He raised his glass and finished his port. He shrugged with a hint of impatience. “Rosa knows you are on loan. If her affections are too engaged, well, she will have to grow used to disappointment like the rest of us.” Pushing back his chair, he rose to his feet. “Stay if you wish.”
Baffled, she watched him limp across the room and out the door.
Chapter Three
Despite desperate tiredness, Caroline found it hard to fall asleep that night. Her allotted bedchamber on the west side of the main first floor passage, lay next to the schoolroom, to which there was also a connecting door. A third door connected her to Rosa’s chamber. It felt like a room consisting only of doors. Even with them all closed, it resembled a corridor more than a bedchamber. She supposed she would get used to it in time. She was not sure, however, that she would ever get used to her temporary employer.
Javan Benedict filled her thoughts as his presence tended to fill a room. Since he didn’t appear to find her replies insolent, she had no objection to sharpening her wits on his mockery. Or whatever it was. She didn’t pretend to understand him, and he was clearly not in the best of health. One thing was clear, though—he did care deeply for his daughter.
The door between Caroline’s and Rosa’s bedchambers had been left slightly ajar from the child first showing her to her room. So, before she sat down by the candlelight to write to her mother, she had glanced in on Rosa to say goodnight. To Caroline’s surprise, Mr. Benedict was still there, sitting on the edge of the bed.
His back was to Caroline. She must have let very little light into the room, for he did not seem aware of her. His attention was all on Rosa, who lay on her side, facing him, her eyes closed, her little hand lost in her father’s large one. She was either asleep or on the verge of it, but he did not move, simply sat there giving what Caroline imagined to be silent comfort.
She had crept out, closing the door as silently as she could. Then, she’d written part of a letter and was undressing for bed before she heard him leave his daughter’s room and walk quietly along the passage. She wondered if he did this every night, or if Rosa had just been unsettled by Caroline’s unwary words.
The child missed her late mother, of course, and was terrified of losing her father, too. Was that the cause of her silence? But no, Mr. Benedict had said his wife died last year, while Rosa hadn’t spoken for two. Perhaps Mrs. Benedict had had a long illness?
And then who was the mysterious Marjorie, who threw cake at the master of the house and retired to her chamber for the rest of the day? Caroline could understand the impulse. Even on such a short acquaintance, there had been times when she would have dearly liked to throw things at him herself.
What illness was he recovering from? Why was he…the way he was? Why ask her about Braithwaite if he was already sure of her innocence? Did he approve of her or not? Did he like her?
While she realized the latter question was quite irrelevant, she found herself coming back to it all too often. It wasn’t as if she actually liked Benedict himself. At least, she didn’t think she did. She did like the erratic appearances of his humor. And his laughter. But he was hardly easy company. He was sardonic and mocking and occasionally rude. Prying. Arrogant.
What or who had scarred his face? And why did he limp? Why was he hiding out here in isolation from everyone else in the environs of Blackhaven?
Her mind continued to spin with questions long after she blew out the last candle and climbed into bed. Someone had taken the chill off with a warming pan, for which she was eternally grateful. Winter was in the air.
She’d only just nodded off to sleep when she was awakened by a heart-rending cry.
Caroline sprang out of bed, instinctively blundering to Rosa’s bedchamber door. She opened it to discover the child peacefully asleep in the glow of a small, covered night light.
Hastily, she crept out again. Another wail caused her to feel for the flint and light a candle. In Blackhaven, they said the hall was haunted by the ghost of the Gardyn child and those cries did sound childlike…
But Caroline did not believe in ghosts. And Rosa was the only child in the house.
Throwing her threadbare wrapper over
her night rail, she opened the door to the passage and walked barefoot into the corridor. Soft sobs in the distance, followed by occasional outbursts of howling, drew her warily along, her candle held in front of her like a shield.
On the other side of the staircase which divided the house, lights bobbed by an open door. A maidservant in a cap and wrapper whispered in the passage to a man with a lamp and then vanished back into the room, closing the door. The crisis, whatever it was, appeared to be over; even the soft cries had subsided.
The man turned in her direction, and her heart lurched, because it was Mr. Benedict, not a servant. In his shirt sleeves with no necktie, the last vestiges of a civilized gentleman seemed to have fallen away from him. He was simply a tall, very physical man, and for some reason, Caroline’s throat went dry as he approached her.
“Why are you abroad?” he demanded, low-voiced but clearly irritated.
“I heard crying. Is someone ill?”
His gaze flickered over her. “She is better now,” he muttered.
Who is better? she couldn’t help wondering. The lady who threw cake? “Is there anything I can do?” she asked aloud.
“Yes, you can make sure Rosa wasn’t disturbed.”
“She wasn’t. She was sound asleep.”
He nodded curtly. “Come, then.”
There was nothing she could do but turn and trot after him to keep up with his long if uneven stride. He didn’t speak until they reached her open bedchamber door.
“You must think us all unhinged,” he said softly, coming to a halt.
She could only shake her head. “I have heard unhappiness before. Good night.”
She expected him to walk on, but to her surprise, his eyes focused on her face. They seemed to glow in the lamplight while the rest of his face was cast into shadow. “Was it yours?”
A frown tugged at her brow. “I beg your pardon?”
“The unhappiness that you heard before. Was it your own?”
It had been, although she had been more careful to unleash it only where it could not be overheard.
“I don’t remember,” she whispered hastily. “I was speaking generally.”
His lips twisted. “It seems we all have our secrets.” His gaze dropped to her lips, flickered lower over her flimsily wrapped body before returning more slowly to her flushed face. The flame of the candle seemed to leap in his eyes, turning them suddenly warm and dangerous. The moment stretched, paralyzing her. She couldn’t breathe.
“Go in, Miss Grey,” he said softly, “before I forget I was once a gentleman.”
With a gasp, she whisked herself inside and closed the door. Leaning against it, she listened to the incomprehensible thundering of her heart. She thought she heard a faint, deprecating laugh as his footsteps walked on. It seemed his bedchamber, too, was in this part of the house, close to his daughter’s. And hers. She wasn’t sure why that mattered to her, but it did.
*
She woke to daylight and a strange, soft, scratching noise. Rosa’s head poked through the bed curtains while her fingernails scratched at their fabric. She smiled.
“Good morning,” Caroline croaked.
Rosa made hasty eating motions with her hands.
“Ah, breakfast!” Caroline sat up in alarm, “Have I slept too long?”
Rosa shook her head, gestured for her to hurry, and skipped back off to her own room.
There was fresh water for washing—she must have been so heavily asleep that she hadn’t even heard the maid bringing it. Having attended to her ablutions, she dressed in her usual grey gown and brushed her hair by the mirror provided. As she bundled up her hair and reached for the pins, she caught her own eye in the glass and paused. She rarely looked at herself for longer than it took to ensure her neatness. Today, for some reason, she stared at her austere reflection with disfavor.
Miss Grey the governess, severe, dull, part of the schoolroom furniture.
She released the grip on her hair and shook it about her face and shoulders. She blushed to think that this was how Mr. Benedict had seen her last night—only worse, of course, for she had worn only her flimsy night gown and wrapper.
“Go in, before I forget that I was once a gentleman.”
He’d seen her, not as the governess but as a woman. His eyes had been all over her… only for an instant, of course, but he’d liked what he’d seen. Heat spread through her at the memory, at the implication. Just for a moment, he’d been attracted to her. He’d seen her.
She touched her cheek, her lips, the corners of her eyes. Her skin was still soft. Her eyes still held the sparkle of life. Her dark blond hair shone with vitality. She was only twenty-eight years old. She should have been a young matron, the mother of Peter…
The old pain of loss cramped her stomach, but it didn’t last. For it wasn’t Theo’s handsome face that swam into her mind. It was Javan Benedict’s scarred one.
“Oh, no,” she muttered and seized her hair, drawing it into a tight knot at the back of her head. She inserted the pins with unnecessary force and regarded herself somewhat ruefully.
Miss Grey the governess, she mocked, and walked through the connecting door to collect Rosa.
“So, where do we have breakfast?” she asked.
To her surprise, Rosa led her down the quiet staircase to the front hall and then away from the direction of the dining room toward the back of the house. There, they took the stairs to the kitchen, which was empty save for a very thin maid and a fat cook. Neither woman looked remotely surprised to see Rosa.
“Good morning,” the cook greeted them cheerfully, pulling two chairs out from the large table in the center of the kitchen. “Sit ye down.”
As they sat, the maid set a plate of fresh bread rolls in front of them with a slab of butter. The girl smiled at Rosa and, more timidly, at Caroline.
“You’ll be the new governess,” Cook said comfortably, returning to her frying pan.
“Caroline Grey.” She reached for a roll. “They smell delicious.”
“I’m Betty Smith, the cook. This here is Nan the kitchen maid. Is it true you’ve come from the castle? I used to work there. How is everything?”
“Well, I believe.”
“Broke my heart not to be able to see Lady Serena get married. I saw her sister, Lady Frances, marry a year or so back, but I was working at the castle then. This time, for Lady Serena’s, I couldn’t get away. She’ll have been a beautiful bride.”
“Indeed she was.”
“So, what brings you from there to the hall?” Mrs. Smith asked with open curiosity.
“I go where I’m told,” Caroline said lightly, nodding her thanks to Nan the maid who presented her with a steaming hot cup of coffee. “I suppose his lordship felt the young ladies deserved a little time off lessons, while Mr. Benedict clearly felt Rosa should have some time on.”
Rosa grinned around her roll.
“Do we always have breakfast in the kitchen?” Caroline asked her.
Rosa nodded.
“The others have breakfast in their chambers as a rule,” Cook said, waddling over with a plate of ham and eggs. “Only Miss Rosa likes company in the morning.”
The child smiled gratefully and helped herself.
“Well,” Caroline said, when even Rosa appeared to be full. “Shall we have a brisk walk before we begin lessons?”
Rosa nodded with enthusiasm. Jumping to her feet, she gestured for Caroline to wait and ran off, leaping up the stairs two at a time.
Caroline swallowed the last of her coffee. “I expect she’s gone to find the dog.”
“And her father,” Cook said.
Caroline’s heart gave a little lurch at the prospect of Mr. Benedict’s company. She wasn’t sure if it was dismay or excitement.
“She goes to see him every morning after her breakfast,” Cook went on. “I think she’s afraid he’ll vanish, poor dear.” She glanced at Nan, who was some yards away, noisily loading pans and crockery into a bowl for washing. Lo
wering her voice, she added, “Not surprised, the goings-on in this house.”
As the governess, Caroline was, of course, above such below-stairs gossip—although Lord Braithwaite had implied she would find a trusted ally in the cook. Taking her hesitation for encouragement, Cook said, “The child loves them, of course, but it’s no wonder she doesn’t speak. They’re both mad.”
“Who is mad?” Caroline asked, slightly bewildered.
“The master, of course,” Cook said, as if Caroline was proving herself to be little better. “And Miss Benedict. Ha, Miss Benedict indeed! According to him, she’s his sister, but it’s my belief she’s Mrs. Benedict, and he doesn’t want anyone to know!”
Caroline frowned. “You’re saying the lady who has taken to her room is his wife?”
“Hush, Miss, none of them would ever admit it.” Cook jerked her head at Nan, presumably encompassing all the servants the Benedicts had brought with them. From wherever they’d been before. Cook lowered her voice further. “It’s not so much that she takes to her room. It’s that he locks her in there!”
Caroline’s eyes widened.
“And before you tell me it’s lies and gossip, I saw it with my own eyes. Took her hot chocolate up to her chamber myself one morning—maids had come down with something and there was only Williams and me on our feet. I couldn’t get in. Then he—the master—turns up, casual as you please, and unlocks the door!”
“I can’t see why that makes her his wife,” Caroline observed. She shouldn’t be allowing this conversation at all. She stood up.
Cook blinked at her. “He wouldn’t bring his mad old sister with him, would he?” she said reasonably. “But not much he can do about a wife. I know they say in Blackhaven that he murdered her, but I don’t believe that. Besides, the girl is clearly fond of her. And his people, the servants, won’t talk about how the wife is supposed to have died. They don’t talk about her at all. Or the sister. It isn’t natural. Mix that up with how this house is haunted and—”
“You don’t enjoy your work here, Mrs. Smith?” Caroline interrupted, a shade desperately. Lord Braithwaite might have imagined she and the cook could be allies, but Caroline already felt appallingly disloyal. She had to nip this gossip in the bud.
Blackhaven Brides (Books 5–8) Page 24
