She glanced down at the ring she had slipped over her gloved finger and giggled. Marriage was off in the distance, if in her line of vision at all. However, courtship might be a possibility; it certainly was an intriguing idea. She giggled again.
Can you imagine, she thought, William and I married? The idea was ludicrous, was it not?
Yet, she could not stop her mind from reviewing what life would be like married to a man such as William Lymington. He would start his own businesses in London as she ran the charity. At night, they would sip wine and share what was on their heart. One question remained, however. Was his heart in the same place as hers?
That was a definite concern. The thought of his rejection of her was worrisome. However, the emotions she bore at the moment, the feelings she had for him, she simply had to share. How else would she learn his feelings for her? Men were not very good at communicating, despite the poets and their sonnets of love. However, if she was able to explain her growing affection for him, she could then explore them outright.
Yes, she would share with him when he returned from downstairs where he had gone to have a pint of ale while she readied herself for dinner.
As if by magic created by her thoughts of him, William entered the room. He looked quite dashing in his dark tailcoat and beige breeches, and the unruliness of his dark brown waves was combed forward in the style men used today. Gone was the gauntness from when he left the prison, and his features were as handsome as she remembered when she had watched him from afar at Applefield Estates.
Strange how time can change a person. In the past—even the near past—any thought of the Lymington estate in Forrest brought terror to her heart. Now, however, she was able to push aside that fear and look at the man as she once had.
“Ah, Caroline,” he said as he joined her on the balcony. “I had the most wonderful thought while I was drinking downstairs.” His eyes were alight, and Caroline felt her heart flutter as he took her drink and set it on a nearby table. He took her hands in his, and she glanced once more at the ring.
“So have I,” she whispered. Then she looked up at him. The man could barely contain himself! “Tell me what it is that excites you so.”
“Tomorrow we are meant to go our separate ways,” he said. He sounded reluctant at the idea.
She nodded. So, he also did not wish to part ways! Now he would ask her to remain with him! Her heart swelled as she waited for the words—and perhaps a kiss, as well. She giggled again. “Indeed,” she managed to say through a parched throat. “We are meant to.”
“The truth of the matter is, I must approach Evan.” He dropped her hands and began to pace. “With the staff under orders from our father that I am to never enter Applefield Estates again, it will be difficult to catch him alone. That is where you may be able to help. That is, if you wish.”
“Oh” was all Caroline was able to mutter as her heart dropped to her feet. He wanted her, but not as she expected.
“You see, Evan is a rogue through and through. With your beauty, you will attract his eye, and then you can lead him back to me! Is that not the most wonderful of ideas?”
Her previous excitement was replaced with anger and humiliation. He had not changed as she had thought! All he saw was how to use her for his gain. To him, she was nothing more than an object meant to entice men. He did not want her to journey with him for companionship, but rather as a means to attract his brother! How dare he! Caroline blinked back the tears that tried to escape her eyes. She would not cry!
“Have I asked too much?” he said, concern replacing the excitement. He took her hands once more. “Please, I need your help.”
What she wanted was to deny him, to tell him to go about his business on his own. Yet, she knew the man needed to free himself and learn why his brother betrayed him. That had been the purpose of this journey in the first place, not for her to have romantic notions. She had lost sight of his objective, and that fault had been all her own.
“Very well,” she said. “I will do whatever I can to help you.”
“Thank you,” he said earnestly. “Once again, I will be in your debt.”
She reached for her wine and took a drink to give her shaking hands something to do. “You owe me nothing,” she replied, glad she had not been given the opportunity to make a fool of herself by revealing her silly feelings for him. Perhaps it was all for the best, for he needed to go down his own path and she hers. They might not have been the circumstances she desired, but she would at least have a few more days with him before they went their own ways in life.
Chapter Twenty-Two
William peered out the curtains of the carriage as they passed trees that melded into one another. They had left the previous morning and would arrive the following day in Forrest, Sussex—and Applefield Estates. He glanced at Caroline, who slept across from him, her head leaning against the wall of the carriage. She wore one of her new dresses and had tossed aside the spectacles, for which he was glad. She had no reason to hide her beauty, and to do so was unfair to those who benefited from what she had to offer.
The woman had consumed him in many ways, including his mind and spirit. Caroline was strong, and since the beginning of their journey, she had taught him much—a debt he could never repay. He deserved nothing from her—less than nothing—and yet she continued to give. She was an enigma he wished to know better.
His eyes fell to the ring she still wore as it lay in her lap. A jolt of passion and hunger had coursed through his heart when he had placed that ring on her finger, and for a moment he believed the symbol to be true—that she was indeed his wife.
Closing his eyes, he imagined being wed to her and the life they could live together. Just as they were doing now, they would find new adventures, though ones far less dangerous, of course. To be able to see her every day, to listen to her wise words, and most of all, to see her smile, would make his life complete. How could he have treated her so terribly before? If he had not, perhaps their lives would be different.
A sadness came to his heart. Everything he wished to tell her concerning his feelings for her was there to be said, yet he said nothing. He said nothing of the happiness in his soul or of the feelings in his heart. Was he in love with the woman? More than likely no. However, there was no doubt he had a great affection for her, an affection he wanted to explore. He could woo her in the way she deserved.
Twice he had wanted to tell her; however, each time he reminded himself of the future. He still had business to finish, including confronting Evan, which he suspected would not be an easy task. His own brother had attempted to ruin his life; he could not simply allow that to pass without comment.
However, someone more important, more crucial waited his attention. The Honorable Gregory Colborn. William wanted to laugh outright. Honorable? Not at all. The man had more wealth than anyone William knew, but he also had power, the kind of power to continue terrorizing women for his own gain as well as that of those who worked with him. In order to stop such atrocity, or at least make an attempt to do so, William would more than likely end up with a price on his head.
How he wished he did not have to ask Caroline to lend aid. However, he would see that no one ever learned of her involvement of his plans by seeing her sent away as soon as possible. It was for that reason he did not reveal his feelings for her, for if his brother learned of the part she played in order to get William close to him, she would either be forced into the Duke’s nasty business, or she could be killed. And neither were acceptable.
Caroline stirred in her seat, and when her eyes fluttered open, William’s heart skipped a beat. She was so lovely; he hated losing her when this was all over.
“I fell asleep,” she said with a yawn. “Did I sleep long?”
“Not long at all,” he replied. He studied her for a moment. Something had changed since they left the hotel, but William was not sure what exactly that was. She still wore a smile, but it seemed more reserved. Her cheerfulness continued, but it
was less vibrant. Not knowing frustrated him.
“When you see your brother,” she said, “what is it you plan to do?”
Her question was fair, and he decided to reply with an honest response. “I want to know why he ruined my life.” He clenched his fist as anger filled him. “And I would like to hurt him as I have been hurt.”
“And what then?” Caroline asked. “After he is hurt? What will you do then?”
“I will go to London to seek out Colborn,” William replied with annoyance. “You know this.”
Caroline nodded. “I do.”
William waited for more, or at least another question, but none came. As the silence stretched, he leaned back in the cushions, and it was some time before Caroline spoke again.
“If your brother apologizes ten times over, will that be enough?”
“I am unsure,” William replied. It was a wise question, one of which he had not considered before. Evan had never been the apologetic sort. “I suppose it will never be enough.”
“Then perhaps you should not see him. If there is no resolution fitting…”
This caused his anger to erupt. “He will apologize!” he snapped. “And he will explain why he betrayed me! That is all I want, and yet you seek to stop me?”
“If I wanted to stop you, I would not have accompanied you. Nor would I have accepted your request to lend my aid.” How could she be so calm in the face of his rage?
She was right, of course. Was this quest he had given himself pointless? Or was it a means to give him a reason to exact his revenge? Either way, Caroline did not deserve his harsh treatment.
“Forgive me,” he murmured. “For raising my voice to you. Your words, as always, were wise.”
She smiled that easy smile as she fingered the ring. “You are kind to a servant woman,” she replied. “Thank you.”
He chuckled. “You are far better than a servant,” he said. “You are educated, strong, and beautiful.” When she looked at him, he swallowed hard. Every part of him wanted to say that any man in her company would be fortunate. That the mere thought of her near anyone besides him brought about a jealousy difficult for him to control. However, he also reminded himself of what needed to be done. She did not deserve the pain in which he would leave her upon his death, for he was certain that was where he was headed. At least he would know the truth before he died.
“It was why when Evan lays eyes on you, he will be enthralled.”
She looked down at her hand. “Yes. Evan,” she said absently. “I must remove my ring tomorrow lest he believe I am truly married.” She removed the ring, gave it a quick study, and then returned it to her finger. “However, our charade must continue,” she added in a firm tone, though he sensed a bit of anger behind it. What was she thinking?
“Yes, we must,” he replied before looking back out the window. The carriage jostled slightly. “Just a few more days and it will all come to an end.”
“When we say goodbye.”
“Yes,” he said, though he did not want to say it. “Goodbye.”
***
Caroline had not been to the village of Forrest in Sussex since she left it four years prior. Now, returning and seeing familiar places—and others that were not so familiar—it was like a reminiscence of a bad dream. This time, however, she was no longer alone, for the man who sat across from her gave her strength. It was for him that she agreed to help, and she hoped the man would be able to find the closure he needed with his brother.
Once his plans were completed, perhaps even today, she would leave on her own. Though she was glad to be returning to London and see familiar faces once again, it would not feel the same. In truth, she had been heartbroken when Doctor Brown had left, for he provided a friendship she worried no one would replace.
Yet, William had done just that through his companionship, and now that would be ending, as well, which left her with a sense of foreboding. She wanted to help William, but she did not agree with the plan he had devised to approach Evan, for it could only end in anger and with fists. However, no matter how it ended, whether it be apologies or harsh words, she would remain by William’s side until the time she could take her leave. William’s side. A place she found fitting—and strangely desirable. Yet, no, she had to return to London; her charity was calling her there.
She glanced at William, who stared out the window. He was still handsome, though he wore melancholy stitching in his suit made of determination. About what could he be thinking? She wished he would share his thoughts with her, for she might have recommendations on how to deal with whatever problems were bothering him. Yet, their conversations over the last few days had been short and infrequent, and, like most men, he did not speak his mind; thus, she was left to hazard guesses at his thoughts.
Despite his lack of communication, she found her thoughts going to marriage. To marry a man such as William would be a wonderful affair, and she imagined their life together. He would be stubborn at times, as he was now, insisting he knew best. Of course, she would allow him to carry on until he had no other choice than to admit his mistakes, which was bound to happen in most cases. The thought made her giggle, catching William’s attention.
“Do not forget to remove the ring,” he said as he turned to her.
She nodded as she slipped the ring off and handed it to him. Somehow, a part of her heart went with it into his coat pocket.
“We will be there in just a few minutes,” he said, glancing out the window again. “Do you remember the plan?”
“I do,” she replied. How could she forget such a simple plan? William would wait in the carriage while she asked for Evan. She would then lure him around the side of the house where William would follow in order to confront him. “I will not fail you,” she added.
He sighed. “I know,” he said. “I do not think you are capable of failure.”
She had to hide her smile at the strange compliment. Not capable of failure? She had failed more times than she cared to admit! However, if that was what he believed, who was she to disavow him of the notion?
“I suppose you never considered that lending aid to a prisoner would lead you back here.”
“No. However, I am glad it did.”
The carriage slowed, and Caroline drew back the curtain to peek outside. It looked very much the same as it did upon her first encounter with Applefield Estates. However, back then, she had not arrived in a luxurious carriage with a handsome man at her side. No, she had come as a young servant with no home or family in search of a position. And she left as even less.
As the carriage came to a stop, William said, “This is it. Answers that have evaded me for four years will now be told.” He reached over and took her gloved hand in his. “I wanted to tell you…” His voice trailed off, and Caroline wondered if he might truly care for her as she did for him. “Good luck.”
She had no time for disappointment, for the driver opened the door. She gave William one more glance before alighting from the carriage. After adjusting her hat and smoothing out her dress, she walked to the front door. Though her steps were filled with determination—or she hoped that was how she appeared—her heart raced, and she had to grasp her skirts to keep from shaking.
The plan is simple, she reminded herself. Despite its simplicity, every plan had a chance at failure, and she could not allow that to happen.
As she approached the door, a man in livery opened the door, his dark hair streaked with silver. Caroline did not recognize him. “Yes?”
“I am here to speak with Lord Evan Lymington,” Caroline said. She raised her chin and lifted the corner of her lips. “I was told to come and see him whenever I wished.” They were the exact words William had told her to say, for there was an apparent undercurrent meaning to them.
However, the words must have been for the previous butler, for this man frowned. “I was not informed that a guest would be arriving, Miss…?”
“Miss Caroline Pendleton,” Caroline replied with ease.
>
“I was given specific instruction that the baron not be disturbed, Miss Pendleton. If you would care to return…”
Baron? Caroline did not have time to ponder this and gave a derisive sniff. “Inform Lord Lymington that Miss Caroline Pendleton is honoring his wishes.” This time, rather than using sweetness to get her way, she added a bit of firmness to reinforce her words.
The butler bowed his head and stepped aside, allowing her to enter.
She took a step forward and stopped, her heart lurching when Evan appeared in the doorway. The man was only a few years older than William, and of course, he bore a resemblance in his features to his brother. Knowing what he had done to William reminded her that their similarities stopped with appearance.
“My Lord,” the butler said, his shock appearing only for a second before his rigid demeanor returned, “Miss Caroline Pendleton is here to see you.”
“Thank you, Duncan,” Evan said. “You may leave us.”
The butler gave a deep bow and left. Evan stepped through the door and closed it behind him, leaving both he and Caroline on the stoop.
“My apologies for my butler,” Evan said as he looked her up and down with clear appreciation. “Who are you and why are you here?” He frowned. “I do not know you, do I?”
Caroline smiled as she reached out and touched his arm. Though it repulsed her no end, it was what William had instructed her to do. “I recently arrived in Forrest. We met at a party some years ago, one hosted by Lady Henderson. Do you not remember?”
The man gave her an impatient look. “Lady Henderson has hosted many parties,” he snapped. “What exactly did I say to you?”
She tried her best to emulate the simpering women she had seen passing on the street. “You said that I was to call if I was ever to find myself in Forrest. I have found myself here.” She flicked her tongue on her lips. “To be honest, I thought you a rogue back then, but I have not been able to get you off my mind. I find you…intriguing. Intriguing enough to call over.” She fingered the necklace she had donned, chosen specifically because it nestled perfectly in the hollow of her breasts.
Redeeming The Rake (Delicate Hearts Book 3) Page 14
