by Mari Carr
“Wow. Your crush just went full-blown. I think you’ve crossed into serious infatuation laced with unrequited lust.”
Darcy sighed and rested the side of her head on the back of the couch. “Yeah.”
“So he didn’t just say no to sex on the elevator floor, did he?”
“How did you know?”
Sunnie gave her a slight smile, full of understanding and empathy. “Because there’s no way you would look like this after an amazing kiss—and orgasm—with the guy you’ve been crushing on—”
“Please stop calling it a crush,” Darcy urged. “It makes me feel like I’m twelve years old.”
“Okay,” Sunnie said, revising her previous statement. “You wouldn’t look like this after a kiss with the guy you have the hots for if everything ended hunky-dory. Hell, if it had ended perfectly, he would have come up here with you, taken you back to your bedroom, and relieved you of that pesky virginity you don’t want.”
“That would have been perfect. He said we couldn’t do any of that because he’s my boss.”
“That sounds like an excuse.”
“I said that too.”
“Isn’t that IT girl from work you invited to happy hour here a few weeks ago married to another of the VP’s?”
Darcy nodded. “Yeah, she is, but Ryder’s still determined that nothing else can happen. Said all we can be is friends.”
“Can I ask you something, Darc?”
“Of course.”
“Did you see fireworks?”
Sunnie had teased Darcy about her uber-romantic side for years.
“So many fireworks.”
“Then don’t settle for friendship. I tried to lock Landon in that ‘just friends’ box. Thank God, he didn’t let me get away with it. Think how miserable I’d be right now.”
Sunnie had fallen head over heels in love with her best friend, and while the two were happily married now, her sister had definitely given Landon a run for his money.
“All I’m hearing is my husband is the greatest man on earth.”
Darcy and Sunnie laughed as Landon reached the top of the stairs. He looked beyond exhausted.
“Rough night?” Darcy asked.
“It was a blackout in Baltimore on Halloween, Darc, and I’m a cop. What do you think?”
Sunnie stood up and walked over to him. “Poor baby.” She kissed him on the cheek. “I guess I better get this guy home and tuck him into bed with me.”
Landon’s tiredness seemed to fade a bit as he wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. “All I heard was bed with you.”
Sunnie grabbed her purse and jacket, turning at the top of the steps to look at Darcy. “Don’t give up on him, Darcy.”
Darcy smiled, grateful for her sister’s encouragement. “I won’t. Good night.”
Darcy walked to the window, looking out at the dark night, recalling everything she and Ryder had said and done on the elevator. Something told her she’d be reliving tonight over and over and over.
He’d opened up to her, told her things he’d never told another living soul. They’d connected in a very deep and meaningful way.
And then Ryder had closed the door again, tried to chalk it up to the vodka. He was going to dig his heels in every bit as hard as her sister had with Landon. He was going to come up with a million reasons why the two of them couldn’t be together.
Ryder might have finally opened his eyes and seen her as a woman tonight, but he was still blind.
Lucky for him, her vision was twenty-twenty.
Chapter Five
Ryder pulled into his driveway around nine on Friday night and turned off the car, making no move to get out. Tonight’s departure from work was much less eventful than last week’s. No power outage, no stuck elevators, no sexy, sweet, innocent Darcy.
He’d been out of the office most of the week, working on-site at the stadium. Today was the only day he’d been in his own office, and even then, he hadn’t left it, taking one meeting after another.
One benefit—the primary benefit—of working away from the office was, it made it easy for him to resist the lure of stopping by the marketing department in hopes of seeing Darcy or hearing her infectious laughter.
She’d consumed his thoughts this week, making it hard for him to concentrate on anything else. Something that never happened. His inability to focus was bad enough—his personal assistant, Phillip, had suggested that he get his annual physical, even though it was a few months early. At this rate, he could only assume Phillip was concerned he’d had a series of mini-strokes because it was the only way to explain Ryder acting so completely out of character.
Ryder, who always arrived ten minutes early to everything, had been late to several meetings. He’d also been caught daydreaming on more than one occasion, missing his cue to speak or answer questions directed at him. And Wednesday, he’d worn the exact same suit and tie he’d had on Tuesday.
One night with Darcy was fucking him up.
He’d relived those hours trapped in the elevator more than he cared to admit, and as a result, he’d been dealing with constant, frequent erections. For four years, he’d cursed his impotence.
Now, he’d give anything to return to that state.
He needed to get his head screwed back on straight because even if he was looking for a relationship—which he definitely wasn’t—Darcy Young was absolutely, unequivocally wrong for him. She was ten years younger, quick to laugh, a romantic virgin—Jesus, he couldn’t begin to wrap his head around that fact—who was looking for true love. To make matters worse, she came from a huge, close-knit family that did everything together.
Ryder hadn’t said or done a single romantic thing in his life, his view of the world was cynical and jaded. He was far too rough and demanding in the bedroom to ever introduce an inexperienced woman to sex. And he didn’t like people. He barely tolerated them because he was a human on the planet and he had to, but just the thought of trying to fit into her loud, boisterous family made his head hurt.
He sighed heavily. It was time for him to put all thoughts of Darcy out of his head. Time to move on and get back to normal, starting tonight.
He’d go inside, pour himself a bourbon, fire up a movie—not Blade Runner, dammit, because it now reminded him of her—and forget last Friday night ever happened.
Satisfied with the plan, he dragged himself from the car and walked into the house. Boomer excitedly greeted him at the door, so he bent down to pat the sweet dog on the head. Loud voices and laughter drifted from the family room.
Great. The boys were knee-deep in one of their damned video games. He longed for a quiet night.
“I’m home,” he called out.
He set his briefcase by the door, hung his suit jacket over a chair, and walked into the family room.
And there she was.
It was as if he’d conjured her up merely by thinking about her.
“Darcy?”
She glanced his way briefly before turning her attention back to the TV. “Hey, Ryder. Gimme two seconds. I’m in a bind here.”
Ryder took note of her casual, friendly tone. He’d asked for her friendship the night of Halloween. If he’d been smart, he should have suggested things return to normal. Their previous employee/boss relationship would have been easier to maintain. Darcy struck him as the type of woman who took her friendships very seriously.
And while that wasn’t a bad thing, he wasn’t stupid enough to actually think he’d be able to hang out with her platonically without wanting a hell of a lot of not-just-friends things from her. Not after he’d kissed those soft lips. Or tasted her. Or felt her come apart on his fingers.
Darcy was addictive. And that was a problem.
No amount of labeling the relationship would solve it, either.
She hit the controller like a woman possessed, then groaned, falling back against the couch dramatically. “Dammit. I’m dead.”
“Language,” Clint said, mimicking the line he’d picked u
p from Darcy’s Pop Pop.
Clint, unlike Vince, was running very low on grandparents, only seeing Denise’s parents once or twice a year, whenever they came to Baltimore for a visit. Ryder’s parents had seen Clint just one time in his life, when he was still a baby. So, the kid adapted, just like he always did, adopting Darcy’s grandfather as her own.
Of course, it was fair to say, Patrick Collins had adopted Clint right back.
Their family dynamics had changed a great deal over the last year or so since Leo and Yvonne had married. Where before, it had been he and Leo raising the boys alone, now, there were three parents in the house. And it worked pretty well.
So well, in fact, he’d named Yvonne and Leo as Clint’s guardians in his will because there was no one else he’d want raising his son if anything happened to him.
“Smarty pants,” Darcy said, ruffling Clint’s hair.
Clint and Vince laughed but kept playing.
“I think these ravenous beasts might have left a few cookies for you. They’re in the kitchen.”
“Darcy made us chocolate chip cookies,” Clint said, his eyes still glued to the game.
“And by made,” Darcy said, acting out her words as she explained, “I opened a roll of dough, sliced it, and baked them. I do not have Yvonne’s mad skills in the kitchen.”
Clint leaned toward her, bumping his shoulder to hers in a friendly, affectionate way. “They were really good.”
“They were okay,” Vince added, though Ryder could tell from his tone he was teasing Darcy. “Not as good as Vonnie’s, but…”
“Kick his butt, Clint,” Darcy said as she gestured toward the game.
“Hey,” Vince protested. “I was just kidding.”
“Doesn’t matter, you ruthless fiend. I still haven’t forgotten the last game.”
Vince grinned, and it was obvious his stepson had beaten her a couple times tonight.
Darcy stood up and walked over to him.
“Leo and Yvonne went out to dinner and a movie. Leo decided to start date night back up. Yvonne’s had a hard time separating from Reba, and she’s supposed to go back to work next week. He told her tonight would be good practice. Apparently, the Halloween party was a little rocky for her. They got there late because Yvonne was giving her mom seventy-two thousand instructions, then the second the power went out, she helped her dad close the restaurant and bailed on returning to the party in favor of coming back here to Reba. Leo said they weren’t away from the baby more than a couple hours. Aunt Natalie was apparently pissed she didn’t get more alone time with her granddaughter.”
Ryder shook his head, amazed by Darcy’s family dynamics. He and his parents hadn’t spoken in years, that silence a blessing. Darcy, on the other hand, always seemed to know everything that was going on in the lives of her relatives.
“Why are you shaking your head?” she asked curiously.
“It’s just you and your family…knowing everything about everyone…doesn’t that wear you out?”
She looked at him like he was six eggs short of a dozen. “Seriously? Of course not. Would it wear you out?”
“I’m not a ‘people’ person, and every single member of your family is the equivalent of six people in one.”
“What do you mean you’re not a people person?”
He shrugged. “I don’t really like people.”
Her eyes widened. “That’s the most absurd thing I’ve ever heard.”
“Nevertheless, it’s true.” Then he added, “Yvonne and Leo should have called me. I would have come—”
Before Ryder could finish speaking, the baby started crying.
“Reba again,” Vince said, not bothering to look away from the game, in true teenage, somebody-else’s-problem fashion.
“Poor thing is having a hard time settling down tonight.” Darcy started down the hall toward the nursery. Ryder stood frozen in the doorway, glancing back at the boys, then in the direction Darcy had gone.
He sighed. “Why don’t you guys move the gaming into your bedroom? I’d like to watch some TV before bed.”
“Two minutes,” Clint said, clearly unwilling to end the game they were currently playing. Ryder also knew two minutes in video-game speak was always closer to fifteen.
“Two minutes,” he stressed in his stern dad voice, even though he knew it would do no good.
Ryder drifted down the hall, intent on heading to his room to change into a T-shirt and lounge pants, anxious to shed the suit.
Instead, he followed the sound of Darcy’s voice to the nursery.
She was speaking baby talk to the tiny girl, and Ryder couldn’t help but grin as he watched her from the doorway to the room.
“Oh my, what a little stinky butt you are. No wonder you couldn’t sleep.” Darcy reached for a clean diaper. “How in the hell can such a cute baby make such a godawful smell?”
“Should you cuss at a baby?” he murmured from the door.
Darcy glanced over at him and laughed. “I figure I’m safe for a few more months. Do you mind handing me the baby wipes?”
Ryder looked around, spotting the container. He picked it up and walked over to the crib, just halfway there when he stopped in his tracks. His eyes watered at the horrific smell. “Holy mother of God.”
Darcy laughed. “Right? And she doesn’t even eat real food yet.”
Ryder handed her the wipes, then retreated back to the door. “I think I must have blocked out the smells babies make. I swear I don’t remember Clint ever stinking up a room like that.”
Darcy wiped Reba’s tiny bottom and put a clean diaper on, quickly, efficiently, gently. The baby had quit crying as soon as Darcy had the shitty diaper off.
“I’m sure he stunk just as bad. Diapers are probably like childbirth. Parents tend to forget the pain because they’re too in love.” Darcy picked up Reba, cradling her in her arms, reverting back to baby speak. “I’ve already forgotten the smelly bottom because who couldn’t love this beautiful, sweet, perfect girl?” Darcy continued to coo, swaying back and forth, as Ryder watched. She sat in the rocking chair, slowly lulling the baby back to sleep with gentle motion and soft humming.
It sparked a memory of him doing the same things with Clint when he was a baby—the cooing, the rocking, the singing. He remembered being overwhelmed by so many powerful emotions as he held his son.
Denise had been pregnant when they’d married. Actually, that was why they’d gotten married. They’d been dating for a few months. One night, things had gotten hot and heavy, but he hadn’t had a condom. She’d told him she was on birth control and they’d had sex without one.
Denise was the first woman Ryder had ever really dated seriously, the woman and her tiny son, Vince, claiming his playboy heart quickly. So when she’d told him she was pregnant, he’d proposed on the spot.
According to Denise, she’d forgotten to take her pills a couple nights, but she didn’t think it would matter. They hadn’t dated long enough that he’d been considering marriage, but when she’d told him she was pregnant with his child, something clicked inside him, and Ryder, the man who’d never considered settling down, realized he desperately wanted to be a father.
The months prior to Clint’s birth had been tense, to say the least, as they planned a rushed wedding, moved in together, and set up a nursery. Ryder worked from dawn to midnight—both at work, then at their tiny apartment, trying to make sure Denise and Vince had everything they needed. He’d only been twenty-four, the same age Darcy was now, and it felt as if he’d grown up in the blink of an eye, switching from carefree bachelor to family man overnight. Even now, those first months of his marriage were a blur. The only thing Ryder could recall was the exhaustion and the fear of failing Denise and Vince and the baby on the way.
Everything changed when Clint was born and Ryder held his son in his arms for the first time. Those days he remembered as if they’d been imprinted on his brain.
The best way to describe his feelings toward Denise un
til the doctor placed his son in his hands was genuine affection. However, after he’d looked at Denise, lying in the hospital bed, holding their baby, that changed.
And for the first time in his life, he was in love.
After all, she’d given him the most amazing, incredible gift of his life.
Clint.
All the anxiety and weariness he’d been suffering from faded away that day, replaced by sheer joy.
For a few years, they’d found happiness and managed to forge a family—him, her, Vince, and Clint. He’d landed a great job. They’d bought this house—Denise’s dream house—and life had been smooth sailing.
For a while.
Then Denise became distant, distracted, and he, unable to reach her, started to work even longer hours, determined to land the promotion to vice president before he was thirty—stupidly convinced that more financial security and maybe even a bigger house would help repair their faltering marriage.
Things continued to slip away, the snowball slowly becoming an avalanche.
“I guess it’s been an adjustment,” Darcy whispered, careful not to disturb Reba. “Having a baby in the house again.”
Ryder walked over to where she sat, glancing down at Reba’s face. “Not a bad adjustment.”
Darcy grinned up at him. “You like babies?”
He nodded, wondering if he’d somehow given Yvonne and Leo the impression that he didn’t. Or if there was some other reason they didn’t want to leave the baby alone with him. “I love them. Yvonne and Leo could have asked me to come home early tonight. I would have watched her for them so they could go out.”
“Are you trying to steal my job?” she teased.
“I’m just saying…I live here and I’m not sure why they…”
Darcy rose slowly, handing him the sleeping baby.
Yvonne was a first-time mother, Leo a hovering and smitten father, Vince and Clint the loving big brothers, so Ryder’s opportunities to hold Reba had been few and far between. Somebody else in the family always got there first.
Reba shuffled slightly at the handoff, then settled right back down to sleep. She really was precious. He huffed out a quiet laugh as he looked at the tiny girl.
