Spencer will want to meet my parents, though. How can I take him into that dingy room, littered with cans and bottles, to meet people who will likely be passed out or arguing?
He pulls me down on top of him and silences my thoughts with a kiss.
I’m so in love with him.
I wake the next morning with a heavy, grey cloud over my head. Tonight, I have to get on a plane.
Spencer seems to mirror my mood. When his eyes flicker open, they’re full of sadness.
“Morning, beautiful.”
I will never get tired of hearing that. “Good morning, movie star.”
His smile grows but his eyes don’t brighten. He brings me closer to him and sighs against my hair.
“We still have all day,” I tell him.
“It’s not enough.”
“Don’t be sad yet. I want you with me all day, properly, before I leave.”
With a very unconvincing smile, he lets go of me. “You’re right. Okay, get up. I’m making you breakfast.”
I watch him leave the room, and then I get out of bed to get ready. It takes me about fifteen minutes to shower and dress. I find him in the kitchen, whisking pancake batter.
He looks over his shoulder. “Pancakes and bacon.”
“You’re so American.”
Chuckling, he finishes up whisking and pours the mix into a pan. The little pancakes sizzle lightly. I pad over to lean against Spencer’s side.
“Where are your parents?”
“They’re in a hotel.”
I groan and press my face into his shoulder. “To give us some privacy. God, they probably didn’t want to hear me come again. I’ll never live that down.”
He laughs. “I don’t know why. Your orgasms are my new favourite sound.”
“Yeah, but not your fucking parents’, Spence!”
His laughter grows, and I want to throw myself off the same balcony he bent me over last night.
“Are we going out today?” I ask.
“Yeah, I have some plans.”
“You do? Since when?”
He arches a brow. “Since last night. Come on, let’s eat up and go.”
We eat and get on the road in the ridiculous Hummer that he hired over here, despite there being only one of him.
“I know you’re not compensating for anything so why is the car so big?”
“I was wondering when you’d bring that up. I’ve always liked them.”
“It’s a bit excessive, isn’t it?”
“Oh, Indie,” he says, shaking his head.
Right, different worlds now.
We stop, and Spence parks the car. It’s immediately obvious what we’re doing. We’re visiting the Hollywood sign.
I should have guessed. What else would you do in LA? To be fair, I do want to do the tourist bit. When we first arrived, I wanted to go and see it all—particularly the sign and the stars. But it looks like I’ll be back in LA at some point as Spencer and I figure out how to make a relationship work. It will no doubt include me travelling to him, too.
“I haven’t been here yet,” he says as we begin walking up the hill.
There are a few people about; mostly tourists taking millions of pictures of the view.
“How is that possible? You’ve been here ages.”
He turns his head, and the way he looks at me almost makes me stumble. “I was waiting for you.”
“Damn,” I say, trying to act cool. “You’re a romantic.”
“Who would have thought?”
“Not me. You were never this sweet when we were going out before.”
“Cut me some slack, I was seventeen, and trying to be cool.”
“You drove a beat-up Renault Clio. You were never going to be cool.”
“Oh.” He clutches his heart with his free hand. “I can’t believe you are judging my old car. The Clio was good enough to get us to the beach.”
“Apart from that time we broke down and your dad had to come and get us from the side of the road at one o’clock in the morning.”
“Yeah, besides that night. It wasn’t a total bust, though. We stood on the embankment with you huddled upto me, face on, not an inch of space between us.”
“I was freezing.”
“I couldn’t sleep that night from thinking about you. I wanted to go back and do it all again. You don’t know how disappointed I was that my car made it home every other time.” I don’t have time to respond before Spencer says, “Good view up here.”
That’s like saying Jason Mamoa is mildly attractive.
“It’s incredible, and we’re not even there yet. All the cars look tiny. There aren’t many people up here.”
“It’s a fairly quiet time to come,” he tells me, as if he does this all the time. He probably asked his people. Spencer has ‘people’ who take care of a lot of things a grown man should do for himself.
Someone even makes reservations for him, and I know Spencer is fully capable of ordering food. We’ve had no end of pizzas over the years.
The sun is shining down on us like we have a long summer – or winter – stretched out. We have today. I shouldn’t complain. It’s not like we’ll never see each other again, and I’m going home knowing that we’re way more than friends who struggle to keep in touch now.
Spencer and I are together, and we’ll both have to make this work.
The ground is uneven, and we have to climb up and try not to fall down. Spencer clutches my hand and helps me step up a steep rock. He’s not let go of me since we arrived. It’s like he’s trying to get all of the touching in before I leave.
“Thanks,” I say, accidentally walking into his hard chest. Hello, six pack. That might not have been accidental.
With a smirk, he raises his eyebrow, and I’m busted. “You’re a little pervert, Indie.”
“You corrupted me yesterday.”
He wraps his arms around my back and pulls me flush against his chest. “Why, yes, I did.”
His lips seal over mine, and I suddenly don’t care about those very big letters on the hill, or the stunning view. All I want is Spencer taking over every one of my senses for the rest of my life.
Twenty-Four
Spencer
After a hike, we go back to my apartment for lunch and a bath. I’m usually a shower kind of guy, but Indie’s converted me. I don’t think they’ll be much fun without her, though.
When we got out, covered in bubbles and dripping wet, we had sex on my bed. It’s still soaked, but I honestly couldn’t care less.
Now we’re having dinner with my parents before they have to leave. This is a moment I’ve been dreading since they arrived. Having them here has made me acutely aware of how alone I am. Ella and Ethan are great—Denny and Jared, too—but they’re not family. Tomorrow, I have a full schedule, which means Jared will no longer give me as much space. At least keeping busy will stop me from going insane.
I’ve taken Indie and my parents to the best Mexican restaurant in town. We’re on our second round of nachos, and our third mojito.
Mum shakes her head. “I still can’t believe my son is known here—and everywhere—by name. They treat you like royalty. They call you Mr Lowe.”
She’s said that about seven times so far.
“Yes, Mum,” I say, grinning in amusement.
“No way are we calling you Mr Lowe,” Indie teases, grabbing a tortilla chip from the bowl in the middle of the table.
I roll my eyes. I wouldn’t mind her calling me Mr Lowe in bed.
“We’re going to miss you,” Mum says, pouting. “The house isn’t the same without your mess and that racket you call music.”
“He’s twenty now. It’s time he was finding his own place, anyway.” Dad smirks.
“Wow, so not only is it ridiculous that people know me by name, but I’m also getting kicked out. This has been a delightful visit, guys, thanks for coming.”
“We’re only teasing. When will we see you again?” Mum asks. “Anyth
ing longer than a month is unacceptable.”
“The audition is next week. After that, I’ll know how long I have.” My eyes slide to Indie. “I’m definitely back over Christmas and again for appearances in March.”
She gives me a doubtful smile, and I can see that she doesn’t think I’ll be home for long. She wants me to get the part, and she also doesn’t.
I get it. Part of me wants longer between movies but this is how it goes. Sometimes it will be back to back, and on other occasions, I’ll have time.
The worst part is that we can only make plans when I’m sure of my schedule. There’s no booking a holiday until we know when I’ll be working. Soon, she’ll graduate and start her career. There will be even less time available.
“You’ll get it,” Dad says. “I’ve been on that tweet thing and seen that the movie is trending. There are a lot of pictures of you.”
Indie and I grin at ‘that tweet thing’.
“Apparently, you’re too hot,” Indie tells me. “Women have been gushing over you on Twitter and Instagram all day.”
“You should stop looking.”
She shakes her head. “Nope, I don’t think I will.”
Like watching other women want what’s yours, do you?
It’s good to be hers again, finally.
Our main dishes arrive, and Indie’s eyes light up.
“Another round of mojitos, please,” Dad says to the server.
Indie looks up. “Just a water for me.”
Three drinks then switch. Same as always.
“I’m looking forward to Christmas,” Dad says.
“Me, too.”
Mum brightens. “A family Christmas. I trust we’ll see you on that day, Indie.”
I hold my breath. Mum has said way too much. She’s never invited Indie because she’s never wanted her to have to have to talk about her parents. If Indie accepted the invitation, we’d wonder why she didn’t want to stay home with her family. She’s usually comes over on boxing day.
Her dark eyes fill with panic. “Erm, in the afternoon, I can. That would be lovely.”
Mum smiles.
Indie made it sound like she will spend the morning with her family and the afternoon with mine. We’re together now and that’s a normal thing to do.
I try to catch her eye, but she avoids me and focuses on her burrito.
Once our long dinner is finished, we get into my car and I drive to the airport. Indie holds onto my hand a touch too tightly.
By tomorrow, she’ll be buried in her textbooks, trying to catch up on the three days she missed. I bet it only takes her a day. She’s so fucking smart.
Mum and Dad are quiet in the back, watching LA pass them by. They’ve loved their trip, and it was great to see them here. I think Mum will be pestering Dad for more time out here—longer next time, probably. They have much more to see.
I park at the airport and start loading bags onto a trolley that Dad wheeled over. Indie hovers next to me, never more than a foot away. Dad takes the trolley, and I take my girl, wrapping my arm around her waist.
We follow behind my parents, and she lays her head on my side.
My stomach flips as we walk through the airport doors. I pull her even closer. God, I don’t want to do this.
“Stay,” I whisper against her temple.
Her breath quickens. “I wish I could.”
“I hate uni.”
“We’ll be fine, Spence. Right?” Her words are muffled against my chest.
“Yeah, baby, we’ll be fine. We can FaceTime, and I’ll message you so much, you’ll be bored of me.”
“Unlikely. Do you think you’ll get the time?”
“I’ll make it. If I’m working long days, I’ll keep my phone on set and message you every time I go for a pee.”
Scrunching her nose, she says, “As long as you don’t FaceTime while you’re doing that.”
“You have my word.” I laugh.
Some days, I’m so beat, I barely make it back to my trailer before I collapse. Out on location is so much more intense. I’ll make time for her. I don’t care how exhausted I am. I won’t miss a day this time.
We use the self-check-in screen and drop their bags at the bag drop point. Next up is security. I’m not allowed in there. I’ve gone as far as I can without a ticket.
“We’ll wait for you the other side of security, Indie,” Mum tells her. Then she turns to me and her eyes water. “Spencer, I am so proud of you.”
I let go of Indie, which has to be my new most hated thing, and I give Mum a hug. “Thank you for being here. It means a lot.”
“Christmas,” she says sternly.
I step back and salute.
“Come here, son,” Dad says. He’s not usually a big hugger but he hugs me tightly, patting my back. “You’ve done us both proud.”
“Thanks, Dad.”
He turns to Mum. “Come on, love. Let’s get through security and give them a minute. We’ll see you in there, Indie. Take your time.”
Indie rasps, “Thanks.”
I pull her into my arms and press my forehead to hers.
She looks up at me with eyes full of tears. “Saying goodbye to you is impossible, Hollywood.”
“Good thing this isn’t a goodbye then.” The moment my lips touch hers, I want to pick her up and run.
“Christmas is six weeks away.”
“That’s a definite. If I can be back sooner, I will.”
“You’ll let me know as soon as you do, right?”
“As soon as I know, I’ll be on the plane, I promise.”
She sighs. “No goodbyes.”
“No goodbyes. I’ll see you soon.”
Tilting her head up, she smiles sadly, and I wince at the sight of a tear rolling down her cheek.
“Indie,” I whisper, kissing the tear away. Fuck. “Don’t, or I won’t let you get on that plane.”
“All right. We’ve got this.” She takes a breath and smiles. “I’ll see you soon, Spence.”
I kiss her again and finally let her go.
It’s the worst feeling in the world.
Twenty-Five
Indie
I’m grateful that Jodie and Andrew are two rows ahead of me this time. Andrew offered to go at the back, but I need some space right now. We’re all in our pods, not sitting right next to each other anyway. My half-height door is closed, and my chair laid down to make the bed. Not that I’m at all tired. I’m too wired to sleep. I just don’t want anyone to see my red eyes.
My heart is in LA, and every mile closer to my parents and away from Spence makes me nauseous.
When we get home, it will be around five in the afternoon. My parents will be up. Well, they’ll be awake, sitting in the living room drinking. I roll onto my side and will sleep to take me. Spencer will be home. He’s tracking our flight back to London. How often will he check it? It’s two in the morning in LA now.
I bet he wakes up in the early hours and checks. I would probably stay awake all night watching the little plane icon fly across the world.
God, I need help.
The last thing I thought I would go home with is a boyfriend. Actually, we haven’t stamped that label on our relationship yet. Not that we need to say it to both know we’re official. There is nothing else we could be, and no way either of us aren’t sure.
That is petrifying.
I jumped straight in with absolutely no rational thought. The minute we kissed, there were no alcoholic parents, no secrets, and no impossible future. It was just him and me, and it meant the world. I’ve barely spoken to my parents the whole time I’ve been away. Mum replied to a couple of texts, but once she starts drinking, she wouldn’t notice or remember my absence.
Maybe Wren or Mila will be available when I get back. I’m going to be tired, but it beats being stuck at home. I can last a few more hours until they pass out around nine or ten. That way, I can clean up the house without them ranting.
“Indie,” the very
nice steward called Max says. He kept calling me Miss Croft until I asked him to use my first name. “Can I get you anything?”
“How do you feel about knocking me out so I can sleep?”
He blinks in shock, then realises that I’m joking. “Perhaps a hot chocolate might help?”
And drink the nasty water they have on board? No, thanks.
“I’m okay, thank you.”
“There’s face mask in your amenities bag if it’s too bright.”
I grab the bag from the side. “Worth a go.”
“I’ll check on you soon.” He retreats to the front of the plane, checking on anyone who is awake. I don’t think anyone is. Heavy breathing and the sound of the plane’s engines whirring are all I hear.
Okay, Indie, time to sleep.
You can continue obsessing over Spencer when you wake.
“Do you want to stay here the night?” Jodie asks as we move our suitcases from her boot on their driveway. I left my car at theirs so I wouldn’t have to be dropped off at home.
“That’s okay, I should get back. I need to shower and change.”
Andrew puts my small suitcase in my boot and slams it shut. You have to really shove it or it pops back up because my car is that crap.
“First purchase after you land your first job,” he says, tapping the roof.
I laugh. “I kind of like her.”
“We’ll see you soon, Indie.”
“Absolutely.”
I hug them both goodbye and drive home. The girls are busy but can meet me later. I have to go home first. It’s probably for the best, anyway.
Spencer is awake; we spoke when I landed. As soon as I get home, I’ll call again, and then see if the girls are free.
When I pull up outside my house, I grip the steering wheel. The last few days have been incredible. I’ve never felt so free and happy. Now I’m back, and that heavy feeling in my stomach worsens by the second. It’s like I’ve never been away.
The house seems smaller and darker.
I force myself out of the car and take my suitcase up the path. With trembling hands, I unlock the front door and let myself in. Please be okay.
Just Like the Movies Page 14
