She stood waiting outside the bookshop in jeans and a bright green top, her hair being the first thing he spotted about her, as usual in the long braid. The sight of Brynne always made him smile, even now, during her reluctant-fiancée phase.
He still couldn’t figure out why she’d been as eager to get married as him last spring and now had changed. He’d been the same goal-oriented guy, why didn’t it bother her then?
When this house first came on the market, he’d hoped it would help her see their future. But with the appearance of her sisters—who knew, she might want to move to California. Since breaking up on Saturday, every part of his future seemed up in the air, and he wanted desperately to do something about that. Well, here goes.
“You look chipper,” he said after he’d pulled to the curb and she climbed in.
“I had a surprisingly good night’s sleep.”
“Wish I could’ve been there.”
She gave him a droll stare. “You know as well as I, then we’d both be bleary eyed.”
He reached over and squeezed her knee. “But for a great reason.”
Her smiles came easy, which was encouraging. He could only hope after the big surprise later, she’d smile more.
After a twenty-minute drive outside town, at the huge Eureka Park, he pulled in the middle school lot and they walked to a grove of trees. He threw down the old and holey blanket from the trunk of his car and they sat.
“Hope you don’t mind Italian subs?” He fished two paper-wrapped sandwiches from the large brown bag in the small cooler he’d brought along. “And canned flavored tea?”
“Green?”
“Of course.” He knew his fiancée’s tastes.
“Sounds good. It’s a beautiful day.”
“Perfect weather.”
“We need to tell Lacy and Eva about Eureka Park. The kids would have a ball here.”
“Great idea,” he said, taking a guy-size first bite, the deli meats and provolone cheese hitting his mouth in a burst thanks to the added peppers. For a few moments they ate peacefully, both enjoying the brisk, fresh air and sunshine.
“You seem to be getting along great with your sisters,” he said between bites.
“I wasn’t sure at first, but it seems that way. They’re both so nice, and in different ways. Lacy makes me laugh and Eva makes me want to develop a better fashion sense, and I like them equally.” She stole one of his barbecue chips and crunched.
He took one of her baked potato chips, did the same. “It’s got to be crazy finding out you’re a triplet.”
“Beyond words.” She took a long drink from her peach-infused green tea. “I feel like I should be even more mad at Mom, but I can’t bring myself to feel that way.”
“She was doing what she felt was best at the time, most likely.” Finances had to be the main reason, he guessed, but had desperation been the true motivation? Like Brynne, Paul wished Jessica was here to answer their endless questions.
“With no idea of the repercussions.” She stopped eating, giving him a long, thoughtful gaze. “Is this what you wanted to talk about?”
“Not completely. I’ve been thinking about what you told me the other night, about being too goal oriented. The check, check, checking, and well, I’m gonna work on it.”
“That’s great,” Brynne said, surprisingly impressed. “Thank you.”
He nodded. “But I’d made one little plan a while before you made your point.”
“I’m not surprised. Which was?”
“I’m not sure now is a good time, but when you’re done eating, I’d like to take a walk.” He pointed out the trail scattered with leaves and small puddles from the other night’s storm that circled the entire Eureka Park area.
“Okay.” She took another bite of her sandwich. “Did you know we all had breakfast together this morning?”
“Really?” She’d gone far beyond dipping her toes in the water to wading farther and deeper into her new family. Good for her. And maybe good for him, since Lacy and Eva might have some influence over her being stuck. “Might be harder than you think when they go home.”
“You have a point. But I can’t not get to know them and we’ve promised to stay in touch. Like a regular family.”
He wished she’d use the same reasoning about marrying him. She can’t not. “What changed your mind?”
She shook her head as her shoulders lifted on a deep breath, sandwich held suspended midway to her mouth. “Besides the fact we have the same DNA, they’re just good people.”
He was a good person, too—she knew that. At risk of making everything about him, which was the opposite of what he intended to do, he opted to keep the thought to himself. “Could you imagine if your mom knew this might happen?”
“I’ve been thinking about that, and I suspect that’s why we lived the way we did. Quiet. Isolated. She never wanted it to happen. And her being practically a recluse shaped our whole lives. I think she must’ve always been looking over her shoulder.”
Now was as good a time as any to broach the topic front and center from his earlier musing. “Do you think being brought up that way is one more reason you feel so resistant to getting married?”
She went inward a moment. “My mom never needed a man. It wasn’t like she was sitting around and waiting for one, but she wasn’t looking, either. She went on with her life, learned to be completely independent, and expected me to be the same. Which made her my anchor, and I’ve felt lost without her.”
“You haven’t got a dependent bone in your body. Your mother did a fine job raising you.”
She shrugged. “I’m glad you see it that way.”
“You just stepped right up and took over the bookstore, and...”
“I’d grown up with it, and always loved it. Hell, I’ve lived above it for the last ten years. But that store was my mother’s dream.”
She finished her tea and wrapped up the half-eaten sub sandwich. “I don’t want to be my mother.”
“Understood. So let Rory take over.”
“I’ve been thinking about that, too. But how many more changes can I take at once?”
Point taken.
“Then this probably isn’t the greatest time to take that walk, but I’d like you to see something. Because, these days, is there ever a good time?”
From the flash in her eyes, she must’ve known this was important. He’d promised not to ask her to marry him again, not today anyway, so she didn’t have to worry about that, but if he led her to the house that he wanted to put a bid in for, after everything she’d told him the other night, it might be the last time he saw her. Still, because he loved her so much, he felt compelled to take the risk. Because that was what a desperate man did. He reached out for her hand, and she took his. “Let’s just take a walk.”
He put the blanket in the trunk and trash in the nearest can. After putting the uneaten food back in the small cooler in the car, they headed toward the wide path.
“There aren’t many houses in this area,” she said casually.
“I know.”
“It’s pretty. I like it.”
“Could you see yourself living out here?”
“With you?” She gave him a long silent stare.
“Okay, I’m pushing things again, I see.”
Instead of pushing him away, she didn’t let go of his hand, so they kept walking. After half a mile, they approached a lane with a long gravel driveway leading to a two-story house set off from the street. “Want to check it out?”
“The house?”
He nodded. “It’s older, but that’s what I like about it—has more character.”
“Wait, we’re looking at a house right now? One you’ve seen before?”
Another nod, this one sheepish. “Look, that was the old me, the guy who ticks boxes. But I’m fine w
ith just walking today.”
“We just happened to be in the neighborhood?”
“Yeah. You could say that.” He took her hand and pulled her the other way. “Let’s keep walking.”
“Well, now that you’ve piqued my interest, that isn’t fair. How long have you been looking for houses?”
“Since before March. But I never saw anything I could visualize us in...until this one.”
“When did you find it?”
“The day before you broke off the engagement.”
“Oh, man, I really ruined your plans.”
“Yeah, so why do you look so pleased about that?”
“It helps drive my point home about you.”
“Okay, like I said, I get it. Come on, let’s go.” He tried to lead her away, but she resisted.
“How’d you find it?”
“Mom found the listing, got me the key. We don’t have to look at it.”
She dug in, refusing to follow him. “Well, guess what, I’m curious to see the house you see us living in. See if I agree.”
“As long as you don’t feel...”
“Manipulated?”
He sighed. “Yeah, that.”
The house was log cabin–styled, two stories, with a big wraparound porch and wide front steps. With a simple front door, but large windows on either side of it. Paul unlocked and opened the door, allowing Brynne to enter.
Brynne took a step inside, curious. Instead of being dark and dreary as she usually found log cabin homes, this one was open and bright from added skylights and high windows placed strategically in every wall. Not bad.
“The kitchen’s all new. You’ll love this island with the sink in it, handy to all the counters.” Trained well by his Realtor mother, Paul pointed out the conveniences.
“But I barely cook.”
“Lacy can teach both of us.” He grinned, and she saw in his eyes the need for her to see the magic he’d found here. She wasn’t sure she had. Yet. “We can learn together.” He continued the tour.
“And back here is an office, den or guest room, whatever you want to call it, close to a centrally located bathroom for the entire downstairs.” He took her hand, pulled her into it. “When your sisters come to visit, it’ll be plenty big for them, plus there are three more bedrooms upstairs. Want to see?”
With all the bedrooms, it was clear what he had in mind. A family like his. He’d already forgotten their first bargain, made before their wedding was planned. One at a time.
She followed him upstairs, trying her best to visualize herself living here, not sure she could.
They didn’t need a house this size. Couldn’t they start small and work their way up, but only if necessary?
“Look at this master bedroom.” He dragged her immediately to the long sliding glass doors. “Look at that view! And we’ve got a private deck.” He opened them, and they stepped outside. “Can you see us watching the stars from here?”
She glanced up at the huge blue Utah sky, only wispy clouds in sight along with a pale sliver of moon in the broad daylight. She couldn’t deny it was a stunning vista. And there was loads of privacy.
“Check out the bathroom. You can practically sail a boat in that soaking tub.” A large shower surrounded entirely by glass was in the far corner. The tub sat in the center of the long bathroom wall. He wasn’t lying—the house had a lot to offer. But could she see herself living here?
“It’s beautiful. I agree.”
“But,” he said, on to her unsure tone. “I hear a but in there.”
How much longer would he put up with her dragging her feet about everything before giving up? It worried her, but she couldn’t shake her hesitation, when her feet and heart felt stuck in cement.
“There’s that walking path right beyond our property—I mean, the property. And all kinds of trails. Good for cross-country skiing in winter. And look at the fenced-in yard. We could have a dog. You’ve always wanted a dog.”
Man, he was doing the big sell, and it only made her recoil. All the great things about this house, with a little more character than the usual Cedars in the City home, were falling on plugged ears and veiled eyes. He’d been right to worry she’d lost sight of the future.
She had to give him some kind of reaction. “It does seem nice, Paul.” More than nice, but she wasn’t ready to admit it.
“The thing is, I’m ready to make an offer, put a down payment on it. Just say the word.”
“When we’re ready to buy a house, I’d want us to find one together.”
She saw the disappointment. “I know you expected me to fall in love at first sight, like you did. And I really do like it, but.”
“But the timing is off, I get it.”
He was being surprisingly understanding. “Was this the first house you looked at?”
“Well, actually, no. I’ve probably seen dozens over the past six months, but this is the only one I wanted you to see.”
“You looked at a dozen homes without me?”
“I knew you weren’t in the right frame of mind. And it helped me hold on to my dream for us. Sorry, but I’m being honest here.”
“Thank you. It must have been horribly hard for you all this time, keeping these secrets.” She’d focused so much on herself, instead of accusing Paul of taking her for granted, she needed to see how much she’d taken him for granted. “It is sort of sweet, in a torqued kind of way.”
He was willing to laugh at himself.
“After my sisters leave, I’d be open to looking at more.”
“Well, that’s a start then.”
“That way, we’d both be sure. I need to be sure, see what’s out there.” It wasn’t Paul she was unsure of—it was the life she thought he expected her to live.
“Okay. When you’re ready we’ll look at more.”
Before they left, they checked out both the other bedrooms, each with a unique and lovely view, then went back downstairs.
“As irritating as I’ve been to you lately,” Paul said, “I just want to remind you that your mother loved me. Don’t forget that. She was happy we were getting married.”
“I know that. Rory loves you, too.” It was true. Mom had adored Paul, so did Rory. They’d trusted he’d be a good husband, given Brynne their blessing for the marriage. Then Mom got sick and died. “I know,” she said, barely audible.
Paul didn’t push her today, not at all like at the Rusty Nail. He’d stopped talking about the house as they headed for home, so they drove in silence. She couldn’t ignore the fact he was way ahead of her. He saw them married and living in that house. For the rest of their lives? And she was still stuck on the fine print. Would she be able to work? How many kids? Could she handle a family without her mother’s help?
Yes, they’d talked about everything long ago, but that was before her world had changed, and she’d inherited a bookstore. Now she had no clue how to make it all work.
When he dropped her off at the bookstore, he got out of the car, hugged and kissed her. She knew he had a late-afternoon class on Wednesdays so didn’t think it abrupt.
“I’m glad you kind of liked the house,” he said just before sliding back behind the wheel.
“It was really nice.”
“Well, that’s something, at least.”
He waved and drove off, and it occurred to her that this was the first time he’d left without saying he loved her.
Brynne entered her store from the front, waving hello to Nate behind the counter and noticing Rory stocking books in the romance section toward the back. “Hey, Ror” was all she said.
Rory turned and smiled, pushed her glasses up the bridge of her sloping nose and immediately went back to work. Rory was at home here. Brynne, on the other hand, had grown up here and still couldn’t see herself as the owner. Taylor’s Bookstore be
longed to her mother, not her.
Just before Brynne let herself in to the restricted area of her apartment, she found a box on the landing.
“They delivered that about an hour ago,” Nate called up.
“Thanks!” she said, stooping to pick it up.
Brides and Things, the return label read. Her heart went out of sync at the sight, screwing up her breathing. The wedding gods continued to mess with her head. Even her hands felt shaky holding it. All because her un-wedding dress had arrived.
She left the box by the door and headed back toward the bookstore, to Rory.
“Can we talk a minute?”
“For you, darlin’, any time.” Rory put the books she was organizing on the cart, giving Brynne her full attention.
“I know I’m being a broken record, but this is about Paul.”
“The break-up?”
Brynne nodded. “He reminded me today how Mom loved him, and you did, too.”
“Your mother absolutely loved Paul and was totally at peace with you marrying him.”
“I was, too, back then, but since Mom died, I’ve lost that peace. I could use some Rory wisdom.”
That made Rory laugh. “Like you ever took my advice before.” She sat on a nearby chair, folded her hands in her lap and for a quick second, thought.
“Here’s my take,” she said. “Paul’s a traditional kind of guy and you were raised,” she paused as though searching for the right word, “untraditionally. Hell, you were practically raised in a bookstore by a couple of,” she stopped briefly, “bookworms. Compatibility on the meaning of family was bound to be an issue. I remember you two came to loggerheads about kids.” She glanced at Brynne for verification, and she nodded.
“As I recall you’re of the ‘kids shouldn’t outnumber the parents’ way of thinking, and he’s a ‘more the merrier’ advocate. But the biggest and most important part is that you love each other.”
“Can we back up a second? I’m actually stuck at the motherhood part. I’m scared because I don’t know what motherhood will look like for me.”
The Reluctant Fiancée (The Taylor Triplets Book 3) Page 12
