“That is true, Miss Alita. Reality follows perception. However, I—”
“Once there is human feeling, once it becomes an idea in our consciousness on a grand enough scale, it becomes reality.” Alita’s excitement grew despite herself. “Your stories will have a significant impact toward bringing the world together with a power most politicians only dream of.”
“A storyteller. There are less noble professions,” Val pronounced with a contrived interest, which was clearly false.
“Don’t diminish who you are, Valerius.” Alita strove to control the shaking in her hands as she observed the emptiness in Val’s ice-blue eyes. Her words had not made a bit of difference. “There exists a much greater plan for you than you have for yourself.”
“Odd that I cannot think of a single narrative given that this is my destiny.”
“Only partially. You have a dual purpose, Lord Ravensdale.”
“I am tired already. Please do not give me so much to do, my dear.”
“The translations will have a significant impact in this lifetime. But you can set the stage for other developments. You have a great ability as a diplomat.”
“A diplomat? Pray tell.” He chuckled even as he held his index finger to his mouth. “Even better. I am the least diplomatic person I know. I am astonished this has missed your notice, Miss Alita.”
“Honestly, Lord Ravensdale, you can be as dense as a doorknob for someone so intelligent.”
“Perhaps you should consider diplomacy, Miss Stanton. I believe you have a turn for it.”
Alita sighed with irritation. “Only consider, Lord Ravensdale. You have a gift for languages and for comprehension. You understand precisely what is going on about you in the political arena. You are acutely aware. Do not tell me diplomacy has never crossed your mind?”
“Never.” Val smiled, but bitterness set into his expression. “How conveniently you overlook the fact that we live in a world which is not interested in the truth. Each and every morning I begin my day with the goal of furthering the independence of Egypt.”
“As you should.”
“I know very well nothing shall ever come of it.”
“You will always face obstacles where persons with more power do not hold to your ideals, Valerius,” she agreed. “But it is possible for you to find a setting in which you can assist in uniting people of different cultures.”
“I hate to disavow you of your charming notions, Miss Alita, if you in fact believe any of this nonsense. Allow me to illuminate the matter. There are evil men in the world. Most of them, I grant you, are in churches, but some of them are in the queen’s government.”
“I am not so naive as to say evil does not exist, merely that you are more capable of discerning the enemy than most.”
“Generally the fearful are the perpetuators of evil while they label those they persecute as evil. It is a common tactic.”
“Precisely my point,” stated Alita. “You are without fear, Lord Ravensdale. “There is a peaceable way to solve problems in many more cases than is utilized. These methods one would expect to be exhausted first.”
“Unfortunately, there are those who benefit financially from war, those whose weak egos crave the moral crusade, as well as those who lust after power. Tell me, how shall I turn this about?” ask Val politely.
“It is not clear to me how you will do this. I do not see the particulars.”
“Ah. An otherwise first-rate idea but for its essential impossibility.”
“Valerius,” she asked impatiently, “do you ever look out the window in the morning, see the sun shining, and think to yourself, It is going to be a wonderful day? And then, even as you utter the words, feel a tingling in your body?”
“Are you serious?” He turned to stare at her in disbelief. Slowly a smile formed on his lips. “Never mind, I know the answer to that.”
“Think about it the next time your mind sets upon a course, my lord,” she sighed. “Verbalize your heart’s desire. See if you don’t feel a physical reaction.”
“And if I did?”
“It is you connecting with the greater forces in the universe,” she stated softly. “It is you changing. It is you receiving a greater power. It is you manifesting. We are all so much more powerful than we know.”
“What would you have me do, Miss Alita?”
“I only see the next step that you are to take, Valerius. That is all that you need know. All any of us need to know.”
He gently caressed her cheek with the back of his hand. Gingerly, he kissed her fingertips, his breath warm. He then pressed the fingers he had kissed to his lips. Alita felt herself shiver. With a slow, sensual smile he murmured, “I took the next step. Now what?”
Alita felt her breath quickening, but she looked away, her eyes fixated on the flowing waters of the Nile as she struggled with her reaction to him.
“I can see, Miss Alita, that there has not been any change in your feelings,” he whispered hoarsely, his voice rough. “Why then?”
As they remained seated, Val studied her with obvious appreciation. He took her hand and kissed it gently. Slowly he pulled the lace on each finger of her glove until the back of her wrist was visible. He turned her hand and kissed her wrist.
She glanced up to see Flora standing on the walking pathway, as a sort of look-out of sorts.
“As I thought, you merely wish to ravage me!” She did not feel the resolution she desperately hoped she was projecting. In truth, his touch thrilled her in its roughness, so unlike any man’s touch she had ever known or imagined.
“You don’t say?”
“Considering that you think everything I say is either a ploy or the result of a deranged mind, I cannot think of any other reason why you would choose to be in my company other than to pursue a conquest.”
He was unable to suppress laughter, his expression revealing amazement. “How good of you to inform me, Miss Alita. And might I inquire as to your process of deduction? Have you arrived at this conclusion because I have not proposed marriage after little more than a week of acquaintance?”
“Oh, this is outside of enough!” she barely whispered. She stomped her foot involuntarily. This is not going well. No matter what she did, it discredited her.
“If I were to marry, Miss Alita, it would be with a woman with whom I could be of one mind.”
“And you are not of one mind with me,” she repeated softly, already knowing it was so.
“When I am with you, I forget everything that matters to me.”
“Do not waste your charm on me, Lord Ravensdale…” She looked straight ahead. “Assuming that it exists.”
“You believe I want to make love all day with women?” He turned her chin to face him. As he did so the flexed muscles of his chest became visible under his partially unbuttoned cotton shirt. “I want to make love with you, Alita, only you.”
“Illuminating. But in point of fact, people in hell want a drink of water.”
“Of course, it is not possible.” He added under his breath, “As much as it might tempt me.”
“Ah, so now I am reduced to a mere temptation.” She ran her fingers along the satin copper bow at her bosom.
“Not to mention that I have little to offer you.” Val frowned, pain shooting across his tanned face.
“What is it that you offer, Lord Ravensdale? It must have slipped my notice.”
“You would soon grow weary of life with me, Miss Alita.” For an instant, sadness overtook those pale silver-blue eyes, starkly vivid even in the sunlight.
“I am astonished at how little you know about me, Lord Ravensdale.”
Val looked up at her through dark eyelashes, his eyes dark with desire. He studied her intently, and his expression was greatly pained. “We are not right for each other, Miss Alita.”
“You mean I am not right for you, Lord Ravensdale. You cannot speak for my feelings. Nor are you qualified to do so.”
“It astonishes me to realize it, but I
do have feelings for you, Alita.” He added softly, “Even after this short time.”
“Feelings?” Pray tell. She raised her eyebrows in annoyance. “And which feelings might those be, Lord Ravensdale? Vexation, exasperation, agitation—as I feel for you?”
He smiled at her, his countenance one of wonder, his lips serenely closed. “As if I’m not alive when I’m not with you.”
“As if I don’t want to be,” he added.
36
The truth comes out
No, don’t say these things to me. Not now. Not when you have no intention of following your feelings. Her hands dropped into her lap even as she fought to keep her countenance. “Do not toy with me, Valerius.”
“I never toy, my dear.” She leaned against his shoulder momentarily, and he bent to kiss her forehead. “I shouldn’t have told you, Alita. There is no point.”
“I do not see myself in your future,” she whispered, feeling as if she had been punched in the chest. “I…am not…in your future.” But it is your choice. It is the future of your making.
“What can you hope to gain from this ploy, Miss Alita?” Val’s surprise was apparent as he pulled away to look at her. “It would have been more effective to have told me I had no choice, that we must be together.”
We must be together. The sound was heavenly—and torture.
“But it isn’t true.”
He stared at her, his expression both perplexed and curious. “And why shall we not be together, if I may ask?”
“Because you do not wish it.”
“I see you with me now, Alita,” he whispered. “Very clearly.”
“I know you do,” Alita said as she moved farther from him on the bench, retrieving her hand. She was the center of his world at the moment. Even that was intoxicating. “But I need more than now.”
“That’s a shame. As for you, Miss Stanton, you have led me on a merry dance since the day we met.”
“Quite the opposite. But you are too obtuse and pompous to see it.”
He smiled, that incorrigible lock of raven hair falling into his eyes as he leaned forward. “Believe me, Miss Stanton, I would never have presumed…But there were indications you reciprocated my interest. In fact,” he murmured as he moved his face closer to hers, their lips only inches apart, “I seem to recall that you initiated the acquaintance. Does my memory fail me?”
She could feel his breath on her lips now. She backed up, glaring at him. “Yes, but…I never…You misinterpreted…”
“There are certain signs which a man takes to mean…” He shook his head in feigned confusion. “But no, if I misunderstood, I sincerely beg your forgiveness, Miss Alita, and assure you that I have every wish of continuing our friendship in whatever form is agreeable to you.”
Can I have misjudged him? “That is most certainly a change in your perspective, Lord Ravensdale.”
“Indeed it is.”
“To help you, I had no choice but to reveal to you who I am. Believe me, if any other course had been open to me, I would have taken it. I had to speak the truth.” Faintly she whispered, “When the truth is so fantastic, I suppose it does sound like a lie. I have finally fallen in love, and I am losing you because I could not pretend to be someone I am not. Because I could not lie to you.”
“In love?” he asked, lifting her chin with his hand so she looked into his eyes, looking suddenly like they might be the gateway to heaven.
But even as joy washed across his face, just as quickly disbelief and cynicism replaced it, his expression perplexed as he removed his hand. “You astonish me, Miss Alita. I thought this to be a game with you. Is it possible you actually entertain the idea of marriage to me? Why, I have no idea.”
“I have no idea myself. Truly, it is insanity.”
He burst into laughter. “Please don’t go out of your way to flatter me, I beg of you, Miss Alita.”
“It was my religious belief that if one is kind and good, wonderful things will happen to one. It is not true.” She ran her fingers along the gold cross at her neck.
“It also says in the Bible not to cast your pearls before swine.”
She could not help but giggle despite her sadness.
“The battlefield gave me many qualities which I would give my eye teeth not to have. I would not have gone down this path. Not for love or money.” His voice grew deadly still. “But one thing I did acquire from battle is the absence of fear. I no longer fear anything or anyone. When it’s my time, it’s my time. I never run from anything.”
“With the notable exception of yourself, Valerius Huntington.”
“I’ll prove it to you.” He glanced at Flora sitting some nine feet from their bench. “As terrifying as she is, I don’t even fear your maid.” In a swift movement, he pulled her close and kissed her fiercely, wildly, as if it would be the last kiss she ever experienced. He pulled her tightly against his chest as he kissed her tenderly but desperately, her bonnet falling off her head and onto the bench.
Alita melted into his kiss which demanded everything from her, which she happily gave, wishing to give more.
There was none of the hesitation of his earlier kisses. He ran his kisses along her cheek, and then he claimed her mouth again, breathing heavily into her own breath.
It felt indecent, as if he wanted to strip her clothes from here right there.
I wish he would, a part of her whispered. Nothing else mattered when he was kissing her.
“Miss! Miss! Are you quite all right?” demanded Flora, beating Val with her parasol.
“Ouch! Flora! You’ve poked me with that blasted thing!” he admonished, pulling the umbrella from her hands.
“I’m fine, Flora. You may return to your bench.” She pulled away, breathless, her heart pounding, even as she struggled to replace her bonnet in her dazed state.
“I’m sorry, Miss, but he…I didn’t know…”
“You did the right thing, Flora,” she assured her.
At precisely the wrong time.
37
Parlor Games
“Did you have a nice time, dear?” Alita found the duchess lounging in their suite in a lavender silk wrapper with a cup of tea and her embroidery.
“No, Grandmamma. It was pointless as always.” To make matters worse, I humiliated myself by revealing feelings I should never have let him see.
“Alita dear, if you further a young man’s interest, your time is not wasted.” Marvella fluffed her gown around her and poured them both some tea.
“Precisely.” Alita warmed her hands with the teacup.
“What happened, my sweet?” Marvella looked concerned as she moved her embroidery to an end table.
“I would not have thought it possible, but I am even more of a ninny hammer now than I was when I left England.” How have I gotten to this place in eight short weeks?
“Oh no, dear. I must disagree. I would not say you are particularly clever now, but you were definitely more of a simpleton then. And besides, beyond any doubt you are able to attract gentlemen, and that is by far the most important skill a young lady can have.”
There was a dramatic changed in her feelings towards Captain Ravensdale. No longer was she possessed of the idea that she must enlighten Valerius in order to save the lives of others.
His was the life that mattered to her.
It was his future, his happiness, and his image that consumed her. This was the state of her heart, and it was no use to pretend otherwise.
When had it happened?
“Do you think so, Grandmamma?” she asked absently.
“Your methods are more effective than you think. You have the young man’s attentions where others have failed. I would have preferred Lord Sherwood, myself, but Lord Ravensdale is as good as yours if you want him. Don’t change what you are doing. Merely do more. You must simply bait the hook and draw the line.”
“Oh no, Grandmamma, you see the situation in a far more positive a light than…” But what if?… Alita was so
distracted that somehow she spoke her thoughts out loud. “Could you be right?”
How could I have not thought of this before?
It was a glaring truth that her spirit was intricately interwoven with Captain Ravensdale’s for some inexplicable reason. She had been so distressed by their differences—they were inharmonious where it mattered most with Val, intellectually and logically—that she had beaten a dead horse.
She had ignored her strengths and their similarities.
“Of course I am right,” Marvella looked quite smug as she took a sip of tea. “I always am.”
Could it work? Deliberating relentlessly, an idea took possession of Alita’s mind.
“What is it, Alita?” Marvella demanded, peering over her gold teacup. “What is that glimmer in your eye? Whatever it is, I like it.”
“No, I couldn’t. It is nothing but parlor games.”
“Parlor games can be quite effective. Never forget, Alita, where young men are concerned, one either wins or loses everything. There is no in between. You must ask yourself, ‘do I want the prize or do I not?’”
“True, Grandmamma. This is my last and only opportunity. I can feel it.” She whispered out loud, “I am willing to try anything.”
“Good for you, my girl. But always show discretion.” The duchess wagged her finger at her.
“I no longer have that luxury, Grandmamma.”
“Now see here, young lady—”
“Discretion has been ineffective. I must be flamboyant. I must throw caution to the wind.”
Alita grew excited as she worked out her plan. Even if he only partially believed her, it might be enough.
A spark of confidence, a glimmer of belief in himself, might be all it would take to set Valerius on a new path.
He was a person of great energy, drive, and discipline, and the smallest bend in the road might change the course of his life irrevocably for the better.
“Young lady, you answer me now. What are you planning? I married the greatest catch of the season—the Duke—and I never once compromised my virtue. A little teasing here and there, yes, but never…”
The Destiny Code: The Soldier and the Mystic Page 31
