Conjuring the Shroud

by Tim O'Leary

wiggles back and forth with the motion. He reaches over to the desk next to his bed. “I got some flavored condoms at the safe sex fair.”

  Our community center had a safe sex fair. These are things that happen now.

  He opens the desk drawer and pulls out a carton of flavored condoms. Red. Cherry-flavored. They’ll do. I pull one out and rip open the package. As I start to put it on him, he puts his hand on my wrist, stopping me.

  “Put it on your dick. I want to go down on you,” he says.

  I say, “I have no absolutely problem with that.”

  “You were correct after all, my friend,” Hathor said after a few rounds. He was panting and clutching Dathiel’s sword, safely in its scabbard, around the shaft. “This is still enjoyable, and much, much safer.”

  They practiced for hours, swords in sheaths, and Dathiel’s skill greatly improved. But he knew he still must excel at the shroud spell if he was to conquer Malavoth.

  That night, as Hathor lay slumbering in their encampment, Dathiel practiced his magic. Being an elf, he had no need of sleep, so as the hours passed in the dark of night, he muttered the incantations and waved his arms around his head …

  I never know what to do with my arms when someone’s blowing me. If I put my hands on their head I’m worried they’ll think I’m forcing them down. If I clasp my hands behind my own head, it seems somehow arrogant. And one time this dude I was blowing covered his eyes with the crook of his arm, which made me wonder if he was imagining I was someone else. So mostly I just move my arms around a lot. You know, like I’m making a snow angel.

  He moves up to kiss me, and our dicks are touching, and then he’s kissing me all over and rolling around like a puppy. He gets on top of me, and I run my hands down his back and grab his butt. He seems to go wild at this, so tentatively I move a finger toward the middle of the great divide, and he starts bucking even more.

  “Will you fuck me?” he asks.

  “Are you sure?” I ask. I’ve never done any butt stuff with anyone. I’ve definitely never had anything in my own butt. When I see guys doing that in porn it looks like a freaking superpower.

  He starts grinding his butt against me, so my peen is poking at him. “Yeah,” he says, laughing. “I’m definitely sure.”

  “Have you ever done it before?”

  “Yeah, once. It hurt a lot at first but then it was so, so awesome. We just need to use a lot of lube. Like, a lot.”

  “Deal,” I say. I can’t believe it. This is totally going to happen.

  As the first light of dawn broke through the trees, Dathiel hears a horrible sound, like a loud drum from under the earth. Hathor immediately leapt to his feet.

  “What’s happening?” he cried.

  “I know not,” Dathiel said. The ground trembled and suddenly split apart. A deep chasm began to widen, and from it a large figure flew out. He was very tall and thickly veined, and his head, slightly redder than the rest of him, was capped with a shiny battle helm, mushroom-like in shape. Concerning his eye, the stories were true—he had but one giant eye in the middle of his face, an eye that squinted as he stared at the two heroes.

  “The One-Eyed Snake!” Hathor shouted. “Our enemy has found us!”

  “So, at last we meet!” Malavoth said, his voice somehow both hard and silky soft at the same time.

  Hathor, a warrior to his core, shouted with excitement at the promise of battle. “This is the moment, Dathiel! The moment we face the Snake!”

  Jesse’s lying underneath me and rubbing my dick. We’re kissing, and I’m so freaking excited for what’s about to happen. More than anything—and I know this sounds cheesy, shut up!—I’m excited to have sex with him because I want to be close to him, and I don’t really think you can be any closer than being inside someone.

  I had taken off the flavored condom, and he reaches into his drawer and pulls out a regular condom. One problem: both of our hands are covered in lube. We can’t open the freaking wrapper!

  Malavoth fought mightily, and his powers were great, indeed. He hurled magical bolts of thick, white energy at Dathiel and Hathor, who only barely managed to roll out of the way in time.

  “This foe is besting us!” Hathor cried.

  Dathiel let loose an arrow aimed at Malavoth’s heart, but the One-Eyed Snake knocked it aside and continued his magical assault.

  “We must subdue him!” Hathor shouted. “But how?”

  Dathiel knew the time had come. He prayed his practice had been enough. He stood and faced the Snake.

  “Your time is finished here, wizard!” he called.

  Malavoth reared back his head and let loose an ugly, guttural laugh. “Is that so, little elfling? I think not. I will destroy you both and find the foolish girl you’re protecting, then take her and lock her in an iron cage, to live out her life as my prisoner-bride.”

  “Never!” Dathiel cried. He took a deep breath, lifted his arms above his head, and shouted the magical words. But nothing happened!

  “What’s wrong?” Hathor cried.

  “My fingers are too slippery to open the wrapper!” I say.

  “Concentrate, friend!” Hathor said. “You can do this! Really, how hard can it be to—”

  “—open a condom wrapper?” Jesse said, smirking. I give him some serious side-eye and reach for the towel that’s hanging over his chair.

  Dathiel wiped his hands, slick with sweat, on his tunic. He took a deep breath and began the incantations again. This time was different. He could feel the magic coursing through him …

  “Ugh, finally!” I say, as the wrapper finally starts to tear.

  The spell was working!

  Suddenly, a circle made of a clear, slick substance appeared above Malavoth and immediately dropped onto him, covering his head. The circle then began to travel down his body, unfurling, becoming a tube that encased him all the way down to his feet. He was trapped in the translucent magical shroud, and he fell to the earth.

  Dathiel and Hathor approached him. Now that the One-Eyed Snake was enshrouded, he could do them no harm.

  He’s lying on his back with his ankles on my shoulders, and I’m kneeling. I kind of don’t know how to go about it. It’s hard to see the point of entry from my position, so I sort of stab ineffectually at him a few times. He reaches down and grabs my dong, which is covered in the condom and smeared with gooey lube, then slowly pulls me into him. He moans and his eyes roll up under his eyelids.

  “Slow,” he whispers, so I go slow. I do whatever he says. I won’t lie; it’s pretty hot following orders from someone you’re currently impaling.

  When I’m in, it’s like nothing I’ve ever felt before.

  For the first time in my whole life, I stop thinking about elves and wizards and magic. For the first time ever, all I want to be is right here, in the real world. With Jesse.

  Does that mean I love him?

  I guess I’ll have to figure that out.

  In the meantime, I could keep describing what we’re doing, but you probably know how these things go. I move in and out, he wraps his legs around me, we switch positions a few times and I find I like the positions where we can look into each other’s eyes the best. Everything is going perfectly, and soon enough I feel it approaching. I tell him I’m about to come, and he gets there first, but I’m only a few seconds behind. I’m actually a little nervous when I pull out of him – I’m worried there’s going to be blood or poop or something on the condom, but nope, clean as a whistle, or at least a whistle that was just up someone’s butt. I peel off the condom and throw it in the little trash can under his desk, then collapse on top of him, resting my head on his chest. I can hear his heartbeat, and it’s the most perfect sound I’ve ever heard, this steady drumbeat that shoots life all through Jesse’s body, that keeps him warm and soft and perfect. I don’t know if it makes me effeminate or whatever, but I want him to wrap his arms around me and hold me, and he does without me even saying anything. My body shudders a little, like an aftershock to
an earthquake. I just fucked someone for the first time. Does that mean I lost my virginity? I’ve done all sorts of other stuff with other people, so I didn’t feel particularly virginal. But this does feel new. Different. And I suddenly wish all those things I did with other people had just been done with Jesse.

  But they weren’t.

  “What are you thinking about?” he whispers.

  “I don’t know,” I lie. “That was pretty awesome.”

  “Yeah, it was.”

  I think about not bringing it up, but I just have to. “Have you done that before? Blowjobs without using protection?”

  He hesitates. “Yeah.”

  I grimace. “Yeah, me too. Not good.”

  “Well, here’s the deal. I read up a lot about it. You can pass a lot of stuff through oral sex, but it’s a lot less of a risk if you don’t come in someone’s mouth. And you only went down on me for a little while before we put the condom on. I don’t think there was even any precum.”

  There’s always precum, I think, but I don’t say it.

  “Let’s make a deal,” I say. “All the blowjobs our hearts desire, but with condoms, and in three months we get tested to make sure we’re okay.”

  “Sounds like a good deal,” he says. We both know three months is the time it supposedly takes for a disease to show up when you get tested for it.

  He smiles. “I don’t have to use a dental dam if I want to lick your balls, though, do I?”

  “We’ll say balls are fair