by Maya Blake
She leaned in closer, sliding her hand higher up his shoulder until she encountered the cool skin of his nape. ‘I’m sure they weren’t.’
He slashed her a mocking look even as he angled his body towards hers. ‘You’re sure? Because you have personal insight into the afterlife?’
She let the mockery slide. ‘Because he’d have to have been a fool not to realise you were speaking from a place of love and concern. And I don’t think he was. Sounds like he was just caught in an impossible position.’
He laughed. ‘It wasn’t impossible. On the contrary, it was very clear-cut to me back then.’
‘Why? Because you’d walked in their shoes? Felt the pressure of pouring your heart and soul into a company only to risk it burning into nothing?’
His eyes turned to burnished slits. ‘Why, cara, you sound like you condone their actions. I take it that means you don’t hate Luigi quite as vigorously as you did when you arrived?’
Faye shrugged even as she scrambled to reclaim the foundations of her fortress before the sympathy pouring from her completely eroded it. ‘I’m merely trying to help you see things from another angle. You just said “back then”. Somewhere deep down you know differently now, don’t you?’
He shrugged, but his gaze swept away.
‘If you regret judging them, then perhaps you should consider forgiving yourself.’
‘Just like that?’ he rasped bitterly.
‘What’s the alternative? Carry this emotional baggage for the rest of your life?’
He swallowed, his hand once again straying to his pocket. ‘Yes,’ he said finally. But in the shadows of that response she caught a trace of uncertainty.
‘Maceo, why do you keep doing that?’ She indicated towards the hand on his chest.
He stiffened, his hand bunching before it dropped to his thigh. ‘It’s nothing I wish to discuss.’
The hollow inside her grew, but she ignored it. ‘Can I ask you something else?’
He gave a stiff but regal nod.
‘Did Luigi or your father make any provision for Pietro in their wills?’
He frowned, then shook his head. ‘No.’
‘Doesn’t that tell you something? I was nothing to Luigi and he left me potential millions, but he left nothing to his own twin?’
His frown deepened. ‘You weren’t nothing to him. Clearly you made a huge impact.’
‘Did I? Then why didn’t he tell me he had a twin brother?’
Bitterness returned full-force. ‘For the same reason he tried to suppress Pietro’s activities. The obsessive need to keep secrets,’ he railed.
Faye stiffened as terrifying reminders of her own secret crashed in. Registering that her hand was still on his nape, she started to withdraw it.
With lightning reflexes Maceo captured it. Eyes on hers, he planted a kiss in her palm, then laid it on his thigh, trapping it there with his hand.
‘You know everything now. Every last squalid Fiorenti and Caprio secret. And I thank the heavens for it, because I’ve grown tremendously bored of the subject,’ he drawled thickly.
She forgave the blatant lie so she could fight the disturbing urge to explore the taut, muscled thigh flexing beneath her palm, the male fingers trailing over her wrist and up her bare arm. She shivered when they lingered in the crook of her arm, then watched, terrifyingly fascinated and intensely turned on, as her skin prickled with desire. Even her goosebumps chased after his touch.
‘I made a vow years ago, Faye. Sworn over my parents’ graves.’ He placed a finger over her lips when she opened her mouth to ask what it was. ‘It’s private. Do you understand?’
She nodded jerkily, her heart racing. Sadly, she understood more than most.
‘Your arrival has thrown that vow into chaos. I’ve decided my only option is to break it. For a while. For my sanity. The consequences be damned.’
Those last words were arrows to her chest. ‘No. Maceo, you can’t—’
‘I can. I will.’
Implacable words forged in steely decision. She knew she couldn’t sway him from it.
A curious little sound left her throat as his fingers danced over her left clavicle.
‘Yesterday I wanted to taste the sweat that collected right here. For hours afterwards I could think of nothing else.’
The raw, hotly rasped words sucked the breath from her lungs. In an instant treacherous little fires ignited inside her. They stung her nipples into hard, needy points, poured heat between her thighs until she could barely sit still.
Maceo’s hand dropped to her waist, dragged her closer, and he caught one earlobe between his teeth. ‘From the moment you walked into my office I’ve been dying to know how long this river of hair runs. Now I know,’ he continued in that electrifying monotone, ‘and I will wrap it around any limb that takes my whim while I drown in the sweet scent of cherry blossom. And you will let me,’ he growled into her ear.
‘Will I?’ she returned, even as desire pooled in her belly.
‘Basta, arcobaleno. Basta,’ he chided. ‘Let’s not fight any more. We’ve exhausted every subject beneath the sun except this one.’
They hadn’t tackled one vital subject. Her.
Now she knew more of his past, the surer she was that any connection between them, physical or otherwise, would be an unforgivable mistake.
There was one other subject guaranteed to stop him, and although the feel of his warm lips trailing over her skin nearly stopped her from naming it, she closed her eyes and said, ‘Carlotta.’
He stiffened. Against her neck, she heard his harsh breathing.
‘I really must commend you for your exceptional ingenuity in summoning these roadblocks, arcobaleno,’ he breathed as he pulled back.
The pained derision in his voice suggested he was referring to an entirely different sort of blocking.
She shrugged. ‘I can’t dismiss her.’
He nodded, smoothing a finger almost thoughtfully over her lower lip. ‘Bene. Let’s get this over with too.’
He withdrew his touch and she had to clench her belly to stop herself from diving after it.
‘I went into that coma as a child. I emerged a man. The company was in serious trouble. Board members were furiously power-grabbing and Carlotta’s brothers were intent on seizing my birthright. I couldn’t let that happen.’ Tawny eyes darkened, inner demons swirling within. ‘I faced several months of physical rehabilitation, while she tried to gain firmer ground from where to fight the board. With our shares split under different names we were in a precarious position. It made sense to join forces. We married simply to stop the company from falling into the wrong hands when it became clear that was the only choice.’
‘So it was a marriage of convenience?’ God, was that hope in her voice? Had a part of her not yet accepted the folly of feeling anything for Maceo?
He nodded, trailing his knuckles down her cheek. Barely leashed hunger briefly flared to life. ‘Exactly so. A platonic marriage that benefited both of us once I was out of rehab.’
She gasped. ‘Platonic? You mean you...you didn’t...’
‘Share her bed? No, I did not.’
She stared at him, her breath caught in her throat. ‘But you were married for almost a decade.’
Piercing eyes hooked into hers. ‘If that’s your way of asking whether I sought pleasure or release elsewhere, the answer is no,’ he said, with the gravity she recognised now.
Faye believed him. From the start he’d seen her as an inconvenience thrust upon him. She wasn’t someone he needed to impress or concoct stories for in order to win her over. She was nowhere near the strata he inhabited.
He could have any woman he wanted...
‘Why me?’ She blurted words she’d had no intention of uttering.
He lounged back against the cushions, eyes bur
ning with that fierce, dangerous light as he gave a low, self-mocking laugh. ‘You think I haven’t asked myself that same question? There are easier conquests out there than you, bellissimo arcobaleno.’
‘Then—’
Swiftly, he lunged for her, every trace of humour gone as he threaded his fingers into her hair. ‘No, tesoro. My patience is exhausted. I won’t be indulging you with a lesson in chemistry. Your eyes haven’t stopped devouring me since you stepped aboard this boat. You want this, so I can only conclude that you wish me to beg. Is that it? You want me on my knees, pleading for the chance to make you my first?’ he growled.
Then he stiffened.
Faye gasped as his final words dripped into her hazy brain. Before she could question him he slanted his mouth across hers in a blinding, possessive kiss, devoured her lips as if he wanted to make her forget what he’d just said.
But despite the glorious sensation of experiencing his kiss she felt his confession throb between them, lending a sharper bliss that came from wondering if this was new to him too. No, he was far too adept at kissing. Far too adept at everything.
Just when she feared every cell in her body would fling itself into the cauldron of mounting desire, Maceo eased away. They both struggled for air as he plastered his forehead against hers, his breathing rough and choppy.
‘Santo cielo, that wasn’t how I intended to announce that. Hell, I didn’t plan on divulging it at all,’ he half snarled.
But he had. And with each passing second the shockwaves intensified.
‘How...?’ she asked in quiet awe, selfishly seizing another minute to put off confronting her turbulent emotions.
‘I discovered very early that my status in life attracted a certain breed of parasites disguised as friends. I was jaded by the time I hit the ripe age of fifteen. Toss in Pietro’s unsavoury exploits and their effect on my family and—’
‘You didn’t want even of a hint of his character associated with you?’
One corner of his mouth twisted. ‘I was no saint, cara. I might not have performed the ultimate act, but I indulged enough.’
Jealousy spiked her insides. ‘Then the accident happened?’
He nodded grimly. ‘I was eighteen when it occurred. I didn’t emerge from my coma for a year. Through it all Carlotta stayed by my bedside, fighting pressure from doctors and her own brothers to pull the plug. And that was before eighteen months of rehabilitation.’
Fresh sympathy poured through her, and against her better judgement she cupped his jaw. ‘Oh, Maceo...’
He kissed her palm. ‘Rewarding her with my loyalty and fidelity felt like a small price to pay.’
Honourable words, but she sensed there was more. He was holding something back.
‘But it wasn’t small. It was a huge sacrifice. Perhaps too big in some respects, even in the name of protecting Carlotta and your family’s legacy?’
He tensed again and rose, striding stiffly away from her. ‘What do you want me to say? That I didn’t feel I had the right to live a happy and comfortable life when my actions had driven my parents and my godfather to their deaths?’
She gasped. ‘No! Why would you believe that?’
‘Because it’s the truth! I was quarrelling with my father, yet again, when he lost control of the car. My words had driven my mother to tears and caused my father to lose concentration. He drove the car off a cliff, resulting in horrific carnage that, by some cosmic twist, I somehow survived. So tell me, Faye, should I have risen from my hospital bed and immediately sought oblivion in a woman’s arms?’
His voice was a tableau of raw pain and self-loathing. She jumped up, every cell in her body yearning to reach for him. ‘Of course not. But that doesn’t mean you can never forgive yourself—’
‘I don’t deserve forgiveness! I deserve nothing but the misery I have brought upon myself.’
She froze. ‘Then why...? I’m the reason you’re breaking your vow?’ she breathed in shock.
He appeared thunderstruck. Then he drove his fingers through his hair, throwing it into sexy disarray. He paced away from her, shoulders heaving as he inhaled, then he charged back, spearing her a narrow-eyed look.
‘We’ve digressed. Yet again.’ His tone suggested he was at the end of his rope.
Faye knew she couldn’t put it off any longer. ‘I want you, Maceo. But I can’t have you. And you can’t have me.’
A muscle leapt in his cheek. ‘Ripeto. Repeat that.’
‘Please—’
He held up a halting hand. ‘You plead understanding for something you haven’t explained.’
She folded her arms around her middle to stop the cold seeping into her veins from taking hold. ‘You’re better off not knowing! Please trust me. I don’t think your first time should be with someone like me.’
His nostrils flared. ‘Why not?’
‘Because you’ll regret it.’
‘That tells me absolutely nothing. Do better.’
‘I’m...damaged.’
He turned still as stone and his skin lost colour. ‘How?’
She couldn’t form the words, so she shook her head.
‘No,’ he refuted icily. ‘You don’t get to hold back now. Secrets and subterfuge shattered my family. Whatever it is you believe you’re shielding me from, I want it out in the open.’
Ice shrouded her heart. ‘You don’t. Please, Maceo. I’m not worth it.’
He gave no quarter. ‘I will be the judge of that—not you. Tell me.’
She darted her gaze across the deck and beyond, for a wild moment wondering if she could throw herself overboard, swim away until the waters sucked her under. Because surely oblivion would be better than the unshakeable knowledge that she would prove him wrong? That nothing could compare to the repugnant truth she’d guarded so zealously since Matt’s heart-wrenching reaction?
‘Look at me, Faye.’
Breath shuddering, she met his burning gaze.
‘There’s no escape from this.’
The sharp edge to his words made her wonder if he meant it literally. Had this been his plan all along? Bring her aboard his magical yacht, set a scene straight from a spellbinding dream and... And what? Show her what she couldn’t have?
If so, he’d succeeded. She’d delved beneath the formidable exterior to the heart of the man. And what she’d discovered made her yearn harder for him than before, when this had been purely a physical reaction.
And, because she’d seen him, she owed him the truth buried in her heart.
Her heart dropped to her churning stomach as she forced out words. ‘Twenty-six years ago my mother lived in London. She was training to be a nurse, but worked part-time as a waitress. She preferred working the posh parties because they paid better.’ Faye dragged her hands up and down her arms to stop the shivering. ‘One night she stayed late to clean up and...and one of the male guests attacked her. He...he tied her up, blindfolded her and assaulted her.’
‘Mio Dio...’ Maceo whispered on a stunned breath, then stepped towards her. ‘Faye—’
‘No! Let me finish. Please.’
His fists bunched but he nodded.
‘The attack was traumatising, and she dropped out of school. Three months later she found out that her rapist hadn’t just taken from her. He’d left her with a permanent reminder.’
She forced herself to meet Maceo’s gaze. She knew what was coming and she refused to hide from it.
‘He left her pregnant. With me.’
Maceo’s face drained of all colour as a wave of visible shock washed over him. Before it could take full hold, before the accompanying horror, disgust and, worst of all, that nanosecond of weighing up which way to go—whether it was worth bluffing his way through his revulsion or fully revealing it—she turned and fled.
‘Faye!’
His voice wa
s a firm command she didn’t intend to heed. Absurdly thankful that she’d discarded her shoes earlier, she flew down the stairs. From their tour, she remembered the staterooms were on the lower deck and made a mad dash for them, desperate to put a solid locked door between her and Maceo.
Halfway down the carpeted hallway she lunged for a familiar-looking door, her heart banging against her ribs when she heard his footsteps behind her.
Safely inside, she turned to bolt the door.
One long arm thwarted her, followed by his large, immoveable frame as he filled the doorway. Faye chose the safer option of backing away from him. Of looking anywhere but into a face no doubt filled with horror and revulsion.
She sucked in a desperate breath when the tips of his polished shoes appeared in her lowered eyeline.
‘Faye. Cara—’
She jerked away from the hand rising towards her. ‘Don’t touch me. I don’t want you here. I don’t want your pity. Or your morbid curiosity. Or whatever this is!’
His hand dropped. ‘Explain to me why I am the focus of your anger,’ he invited, with a quiet calm that perversely ignited her anger. Anger that made her forget she wasn’t intending to look into his face. Into eyes that stared back at her with stomach-hollowing ferocity.
‘Because I warned you and you didn’t listen!’
His head tilted with mocking arrogance. Then he had the audacity to nod in agreement. ‘True. You warned me that you were “damaged.”’ He had the gall to use air quotes. ‘That I would “regret it”. Oh, and something about you not being worth it. Have I got everything?’
‘No!’ she railed. ‘You haven’t adequately described your disgust. The horror I saw on your face!’
Mockery and arrogance fled and his face assumed the formidable façade that made lesser men quake in his presence. ‘Of course I’m horrified. No woman should have to endure what your mother went through.’
‘You...’ She stopped. Sucked in a stunned breath as his words sank in.
‘Any man who harms a hair on a woman’s head isn’t worthy of the name. Any bastardo who does what was done to your mother is a deplorable waste of space who deserves to be thrown into the darkest pit,’ he condemned, flames roaring in his eyes.
