“Nonsense, if my daughter wants a hug, I’ll never turn her away.” Dad pulls me in and hugs me tight. The chatter around us rises and several cameras flash. It’s insane a father and daughter hugging gets this kind of attention.
“Of course, Your Majesty. I’m sure it’s very good for the people to see you bonding with your daughter.” He nods his head a few times, always the opportunist. “We want everyone to be as accepting of the princess as possible.”
I step back from my dad, and he looks me over.
“Are you alright Adella? Are you ill?” He touches my cheek and forehead.
“I… I don’t know.” Glancing at Wendell, I wait for him to inform my dad of what has happened.
“Sir it seems that a young man your daughter used to have a relationship with has come here and caused a bit of havoc.”
Dad glances at me and a fresh wave of tears fight against me. “I’m not sure how he found out about this. I’m sorry.”
“I don’t see how this is your fault Adella. Wendall, would you bring the car around?” Wendall bows before leaving out a back door and dad leads me back out into the hallway and down to the exit. “Don’t worry dear. I’ll have him on a plane back to America within the hour.”
“I can’t imagine your people are very happy with me. I’m afraid I’ve been an embarrassment to you and the country.”
“They’re your people too, Adella. Everyone has an embarrassing moment from time to time. As royalty we are just unfortunate everything is public, even if it should be private.”
Wendell is outside to meet us with the car. Dad and he discuss options for Xavier. During the ride back to the castle my dad strokes my arm and attempts to be comforting. He even threatens to throw Xavier into the nonexistent dungeon, then offers to have one built when I point out the castle doesn’t have one.
With my dad’s attention needed in a million different directions, I retreat to my room to hide from the day. Now that Seneca’s back home I’m stuck with my own thoughts for company. Right now, they aren’t very kind.
How could I have been so stupid thinking I could fit in to this life. There are too many things I haven’t even considered and don’t understand.
Can I spend the rest of my life never having privacy? Never getting to do anything just because I want to and have my days filled with never-ending lists waiting to be completed? People always counting on me to have the right answers at the right time, and others always counting on me to have the wrong answer just proving I don’t belong.
I can’t do this. What was I thinking? I’ve made a huge mistake.
These people don’t trust me, and after today, they will hate me. The nobles in parliament made it clear, and the sweet people in town will too after the events from today spread. I never should have come here. I was just some stupid girl with a dream to meet my father. It’s never going to be what I imagined before I knew who he was. He’s the king. He will always have big important things to take care of. He makes time for me now but being king is an all the time responsibility, he can’t keep pushing things aside for me.
Things were so much simpler, life was so much simpler, before this. I should just go home, maybe my mother was right. Maybe now she will want to talk. She still owes me some answers.
After the way we left things, I’m worried if mom will answer the phone. I haven’t spoken to her since I left, but she hasn’t been calling me either. After the fourth ring I expect it to go to voicemail and I’m surprised when she says hello.
“Hi, Mom.” I step out onto the balcony and lean my forearms against the railing.
“Adella, it’s nice to hear from you. How are you enjoying the royal life?”
“Why didn’t you come? You let me come here knowing a stranger was going to hit me with the second biggest secret of my life.” It doesn’t matter if that stranger is my father, it should have come from her.
“I think it’s rather obvious.” I can hear the rustling of papers through the phone, meaning she’s sitting at the table grading them.
“It’s not to me. You were hurt? Embarrassed?” I huff. “None of that makes it okay to hide my father from me. You should have told me.” I throw my hand up in the air and pace along the balcony.
“I couldn’t be there around his family looking like the mistress.”
Most moms would do anything for their kid. Why not mine?
“Mom, the queen died, dad has no other children but me. That’s why he contacted me early.”
“I didn’t realize.”
“Of course not, you never do.” I’ve learned a lot about my mom lately and why she is the way she is but it’s not an excuse. She needs to realize that more than her feelings matter.
“I never thought it would be an issue. In a few months you wouldn’t have been a princess any longer and none of it would matter.”
“Even if I’m not the queen, I’ll always be the princess. Things don’t go away if you pretend they don’t exist. Not your baby’s father or the status of that baby.”
She sighs heavily. “I was afraid to tell you. I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I worried he would try to take you. I was so certain it would happen, I kept my own daughter at a distance. Now he has, and it was all for nothing.”
“No mom he didn’t. Didn’t you ever wonder if you made a mistake?” Thankful to finally have an answer why we didn’t have a relationship like every other little girl I knew. Mom never braided my hair, we didn’t stay up late giggling and eating ice cream on weekends. Now that I know why, I pity her. Too many years of keeping herself guarded turned her into a closed-off, cold recluse, even to her own daughter.
“I knew I made plenty of mistakes. The first being not marrying your father, then it just spiraled from there.” She sighs loudly through the phone. “I loved him so much. When I found out about you, I was willing to do whatever it took to be a family. But by then it was too late. He was already married, so quickly, and it broke my heart. I knew then I would never be the most important thing in his life. He had duties and responsibilities. A country to take care of and it would always come first. I could come in second to you, but I could never allow you to come in second to that country.”
“You don’t know what would have happened. You punished him for something you didn’t even know if he would do. You punished me, too.” I rub my neck to release the knots that have formed.
“I was young, not much older than you actually. I’ve always been so afraid he would use his money and power. I let that fear dictate my life and how we lived. I’m sorry I never let you know your father.”
I sit in a chair when my breathing becomes labored from pacing and we are both quiet for a moment. I’ve never had a heart to heart with my mom and it’s a shame it has to happen when I’m four thousand miles away.
“When are you coming home?” She asks not sounding as flat and emotionless as she usually does.
“I’ve actually decided to stay. At first it was just until my birthday to formally give up the throne, but—”
“I see.” Whatever softness she let through momentarily, is long gone. “This is what I was afraid would happen when you traveled there and were dazzled by your father.”
“I love it here. I can make a difference in people lives. I can still come visit or you could come here. This place, these people, they’re counting on me.” There are so many things I want to suggest after visiting the city. Things I think would benefit the people. There aren’t a lot of poor families, but most of the citizens are working class. One bad week could destroy them. I don’t have those worries, so I should do something to ease theirs.
“It doesn’t have to be your problem, Adella. You can always come home, re-enroll in classes. Everything can go back the way it was.”
I thought we were getting somewhere but it’s like she isnt even listening to what I’m saying.
“Things will never go back to the way they were, and I don’t want them to. Secrets and strained relationships. That’s no wa
y to live.” I was considering running, but not anymore. I have nowhere to run to. This is where I belong.
“I love you, Adella. I just want you to be happy.”
“Then let me be happy. Let me make my decisions and support me through them when I succeed or if I fail.” It’s hard right now, but it will get easier with time, I’m sure of it.
Chapter Seven
“We have enough funding to buy all the equipment for the children’s hospital.” Lord Bachran says slapping a paper down on my desk.
“That’s great news! Where did it come from?” I was beginning to worry my plans for the hospital would have to change. My father would allocate more money to this if I asked but the money in the healthcare reserve has already been assigned to specific plans. I can’t take anymore from the structure improvements reserve. I needed to fund this on my own. So, I began asking for donations from the elite and nobles of the country.
“An anonymous donor. I just got the letter and came straight to tell you.” He settles into the chair facing the desk taking a couple deep breaths to offset the slight huffing and puffing.
“You could have called.” I smile at him. He’s quickly becoming my favorite noble, and not just because he volunteered to help me with the children’s hospital project. He is a compassionate man and shares my concerns for people’s wellbeing. He’s a good ally to have.
“I could have, but I thought you would want to get to work right away so I made the decision to come to you instead.” He shifts in the chair to set a briefcase on the floor next to him and pulls out various folders.
I pick up the sheet of paper he set on the desk looking over the amount donated. “That’s a lot of money.” Whoever did this is very kind and generous with their money. I look at Bachran, he’s a kind man and a noble with a lot of money. “I wish they would at least let me thank them or dedicate the building to them. It was a very generous thing to do.”
“Don’t look at me with those pretty eyes child. It wasn’t me, though now I feel I should have given more.” He slumps farther back into the chair, his frown by the second.
“Don’t be ridiculous. You give so much of your time to this, don’t ever feel like you aren’t doing enough. You were the first donation after all. Maybe the donor will change their mind if you can get word to them?”
“I received specific instructions the donor wishes to remain anonymous. I’ll get the message to them through their representative, but don’t expect a response. With all the funding in place for the equipment and the funds to pay for costs for the first six months, we can open the hospital as soon as everything is in place. If we concentrate on level one only, I expect we can open the first section in three weeks.”
“That’s even better news. Be sure to release the information so we can get the first patients enrolled in the program.” I didn’t expect to be able to take patients for at least six months. I’m glad we can start making differences in these family’s lives.
The kids are already scared and sick, I want to do whatever we can to make it easier on them and the parents. Each treatment room is set up like small apartments, the parents get to stay with the child and the children don’t feel like they are trapped in a hospital. With food, care, and lodging covered I hope to be making their lives as easy as possible while their family is having a difficult time. All while keeping millions of dollars in our economy and appeasing any worries the nobles and parliament have over using funds from the structure improvements reserve toward this project.
“Your Highness, I really must commend you on what you’re doing. I admit, I was one of the ones against this. Nothing like this has been done before and it’s a beautiful thing to help the families of Messalina, especially those who need it most. Your father is a very charitable man and great leader, I see many of the same qualities in you.”
“I don’t want the attention it’s giving me. I want the attention on the hospital. We still need funding for upcoming years, too. I don’t want this to fail.” Just having the facilities in the country is a better option for the families, but I want to be able to keep the services free. I want to make their lives better and easier.
“I have some other news. The anonymous donor has pledged to donate twenty five percent of the funding for the first five years of the program.” His still pink cheeks puff out as his grin spreads.
“Will you at least promise if you do find out who it is to tell me?”
“Of course princess, but they are asking to remain anonymous for a reason. Try not to worry about it too much and just take the victory for what it is.”
“You’re right. There’s a lot to do. Orders to make, doctors to contact. We have a lot of work ahead of us if we want to accept our first patients in the next few weeks.” He scribbles across a notepad as I list off all the people we need to call. “Let’s organize a gala. We can hold it at the hospital and invite everyone in. That way they can see what we are doing, hopefully more will get behind us and donate.”
“That’s a wonderful idea. The nobles do love to get together and drink and show each other how rich they are.” Another reason he’s one of my favorite people. I never would imagine a titled nobleman to be so down to earth.
My laughter bubbles out at his honesty. It’s a shame how they treat him just because he doesn’t spend his money like they do and live the same life they do. The same way I imagine they would treat me if they weren’t trying so hard to get on my good side as the princess.
“Will you be all right to handle a lot of those details? I’ll be gone for a few days next week, but I’ll return for the gala and opening. I can postpone my trip if you need me here.” Although I really don’t want to, I’m really looking forward to my trip back home and seeing Seneca. It’s only been a few weeks but feels like years.
“I’ll be fine. Go on your trip. You spend all your time on these projects. Do you do anything fun that a young girl should? My daughter goes on trips, goes shopping, has lunch with friends. I should have her invite you.” Even when I was a ‘regular’ girl I didn’t do those things much. Seneca has always been my closest friend and the only one I really spent any time with. Without her planning and insistence, I probably would have spent all my time at home.
“She did. I’m just so busy. It’s taken some time settling in to this new life. I’ll make the time to see her soon.” Even if I don’t really want to, I will. I can’t be that same girl anymore who hides away inside.
“Good. Everyone deserves a break now and again.”
I hope he realizes he can say no. My being the princess doesn’t mean he is forced into anything. “That includes you. If I’m asking too much from you let me know.”
“There is nothing I would rather do with my time. I’ll take a break when you do.”
“Deal, you get the week off after my trip. The whole week. I won’t take no for an answer.”
“I can’t believe you aren’t going to be my roommate anymore. Now who’s going to go have scary movie marathons with me?” Seneca pouts as she tapes up another box. This is really going quicker than I thought it would since I’m leaving most things with Sen. I don’t need dishes or any of my furniture and she’s going to take her pick of my clothes and send the rest to charity. I’m really only taking pictures and other sentimental things. I could have had her ship my things to me but making the trip to pack up was also about seeing her and coming back home. My life is changing quickly, and I need to feel like I said goodbye to this part.
"I’m going to miss having you right down the hall, too. We can still have movie marathons, you just have to come visit me now. Maybe you can come back for Christmas break if you want and don’t think your parents would mind.
“That would be incredible! Do you think your dad would mind me being there for a holiday?” She drops the tape in her excitement and it rolls across the room.
“Of course he wouldn’t. I’ll discuss it with him when I get back.” I grab the tape off the floor working to pull it from itself.
“So, you two are getting along pretty well then?”
I look up and nod. It’s been great getting to know my dad — just having a dad. “He’s great. We have a lot in common. I know it’s a big decision to move there, but it’s the right one. I really have the chance to make a difference for people who need it.”
“That’s great. No matter how much I complain about missing you, I really am happy for you.”
“I know.” I sigh letting my arms fall to the sides. “It’s a big change, I feel it, too.”
Seneca’s lip quivers for only a second before a bright smile spreads across her face. “Tell me about that yummy duke. And now there is a second one fawning over you?”
“Quinn isn’t yummy. He’s obnoxious.” And yummy but I don’t want to encourage her. “He’s too much of a playboy.”
“Is he still? It seems like those days may be behind him. I think he’s pretty smitten with you Adella.”
“Whose side are you on?” The tape finally comes loose, and I pull off a strip to seal my box.
“Yours. Always. I’m just trying to point out where you might be a little blinded by anger.” She holds up her fingers showing me the small amount. “Have you actually seen him doing any playboy things?”
“No. Its more his talk and flirty actions. I don’t have time for his games.” I take the box I filled and place it on the stack in the corner. Then I remove pictures from the wall and place them on the bed, so I can wrap them.
“Do you really think he’s playing games?” I give her the most annoyed look I can muster. “Fine. What about the new one? Tell me about him.”
“He’s handsome and sweet, but so utterly boring. I just don’t feel anything close to what I feel with Quinn. I know that’s not what it’s all about, but it’s hard to not consider it as a factor.” I know what kind of attraction I can feel for someone else, so why should I settle for lukewarm and sweet
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