by Abbie Lyons
"Okay," I said, steadying my voice so I didn't give myself away any more than I already had. "What's up?"
"You know as well as I do that my brother and I don't have the most...fraternal relationship," Wilder said, pushing his glasses up his nose. Another spike of panic. He set the wand on the desk, folding his muscled arms. "So, and again, I apologize, Nova, but I have to ask: are you and my brother seeing each other? Romantically? Because I can't help but notice that you've been spending some time together outside of class."
The panic lanced through me again. I had to process this. Wilder wanted to know if Raines and I were dating. Which we weren't, definitely not. But just straight-up denying it would be more suspicious than not. Raines and I had been seen, at least a few times, in plain sight, having our stupid "I need to talk to you" conversations.
And Raines was probably right: those were my fault.
So I blurted out the first thing that came to my mind.
"No way," I said. "Not that it's any of your business, but I'm actually dating...Collum."
I didn't know where that came from. Well, that wasn't totally true. The conversation we'd had in the study room was still pretty fresh in my memory. So as lies went, it was the one founded in the most truth. I clenched my fists again, heart hammering as I watched Wilder's reaction.
"Oh," he said simply. "Collum Tavish?”
I nodded.
“I...well, I see. Collum is a fine young demon. I've known the Tavish family for quite some time."
I blushed in spite of myself. "Yeah...he's great. We're really hitting it off."
Was that even something someone would say about their 100% real, definitely not a sham boyfriend? I hoped so.
"Yeah, so, I guess I've been talking to Raines a bit too, just because, you know. Those three are just joined at the hip." I shrugged. "I know better than to come between a guy and his bros."
Raines would probably go full fire-eyed if he could hear me referring to the Infernal Three as “bros,” but fortunately, soul binding stopped short of literal telepathy.
"Naturally." Wilder said. I couldn't be totally sure, but he seemed to be buying it. My pulse slowed a little, although I didn't allow myself full relief just yet.
“Simple as that,” I said, probably a bit too suspiciously. Normally I was much better than this at selling a lie.
Wilder put his hand on mine, sending a shiver down my spine. Last semester that would’ve been a good shiver. This time, it made me decidedly uneasy.
“You’re a smart, strong, and, frankly, beautiful young woman,” Wilder mused. “The truth is, I don’t think any of the young men here at Hades Academy are good enough for you.”
This time, I could tell the gross feeling in my stomach was my own and not just Raines’s.
“You’re wrong,” I told him in my most confident tone of voice. “Collum is perfect for me.”
Chapter Ten
I rushed to the common room after my exetasis with one simple goal: to find Collum Tavish, and tell him that we’d begin dating—or whatever we wanted to call this fake version of it—effective immediately. There’d be rules, of course, but he was so eager to make the girl who broke his heart jealous that I was sure he’d agree. As for me—that session with Wilder was way too close of a call. I needed him, or anybody else for that matter, totally off the trail of Raines and me.
Even though it was well past one in the morning when I arrived back in the common room, the Infernal Three were still in their usual corner spot. They were parked there so often that I was beginning to half-wonder if they each had some special demon power to skip sleeping. Hell, I would’ve loved to have that ability myself. Would certainly cut down on my coffee consumption.
I made a beeline straight over to them.
“Hey, Tavish,” I said, not even immediately realizing that I was mimicking his last-name routine. “Can we talk for a few minutes?”
I felt two new emotions build up somewhere deep inside me: suspicion and jealousy. Raines knew exactly what I was there for, but what he must’ve been wondering was why. What had made me suddenly change my mind about this ridiculous endeavor? The jealousy was more concerning to me. Wasn’t this whole thing his idea in the first place? Did the idea of Collum pretending to be my boyfriend actually make him envious? I hoped that maybe I was just misreading what he was feeling.
Aleksandr gave me a strange look. He was much harder to read than the rest of his little crew, but I could tell he had no idea what was going on.
I guess the Infernal Three doesn’t let each other in on every single detail of each other’s lives after all.
“Sure thing,” Collum said. He turned to his friends. “Excuse me for just a few minutes.”
I led him out a side door into one of the back gardens, acutely aware that this was the same spot where Raines and I had some of our late-night conversations—and the place where we became bound for life. But I didn’t want to think too much about that night.
“To what do I owe the pleasure?” Collum asked as we took a seat on a marble bench.
“You know exactly why I’m here,” I told him. “I’m in. I’ll be your...you know.”
“My girlfriend.”
“Not your girlfriend,” I corrected. “By all appearances, I’ll be your girlfriend, yes. But we won’t actually be dating. Nothing like that.”
Collum laughed, which I had to admit, was super sexy. He always seemed so at ease with himself, unlike a certain mopey member of his posse. “Easy, Donovan,” he said. “I know it’s not for real, so don’t worry about me getting any big ideas.”
“Well, good,” I said. Though somebody as cute as Collum getting “big ideas” wasn’t the worst thought in the world. Not that I’d ever let him act on them. “But either way, we should establish some rules right upfront.”
He nodded. “Makes sense. So what rules did you have in mind, honey?” he joked.
“Rule number one: don’t call me that. Or any other pet names.”
He laughed that charming laugh again. “I don’t think you’re quite getting it, Donovan. We’re going to need to keep up appearances here, and that might mean a pet name or two. At least in public. But if it suits ya, I’ll avoid that in private.”
“Perfect,” I said. “Next rule: absolutely no kissing. None whatsoever. Not in private, not in public, not ever. You try to kiss me, and I’m calling this whole stupid thing off. Got it?”
“No kissing,” he agreed. “That could make things, er...” He blushed. “But do you think we’ll have to do, you know, something? Will it look strange if we’re just keeping three feet from each other?”
“Well...” Beyond this Pretty Woman no-kissing rule, I really had not thought about the logistics involved here.
“There are some other public displays of affection, eh? Holding hands, cuddling on the common room couches, those kinds of things. Nothing you’re not comfortable with,” he added.
Truthfully, all of that sounded nice. Even kissing Collum sounded nice. For a second, I even managed to wonder why I wouldn’t just want to date him for real. He was the total package, after all: cute, funny, charming, not mopey, and not a professor who might want me dead. That all would’ve made for an appropriate crush and/or boyfriend.
But no. I didn’t have the time for casual dating, let alone a real relationship. Not with everything else going on in my life and at school. Especially considering that I’d have to hide the fact that I was bound with somebody else. So, yeah, the thought of kissing Collum and being his girlfriend for real was admittedly intriguing, but no, it wasn’t going to happen.
“Some PDA is fine,” I agreed. “But let’s keep it to a minimum, okay? I don’t think people are gonna think we’re liars just because we don’t spend every waking second on top of each other.”
“Aye. I think we’ll just have...to spend time together. You know, lounge around together and go on dates or things of that nature so people see us out and about. Don’t worry, I’ll try not to be
too much of a bore.”
There was that dimpled smile again. I smiled back. “Maybe I’ll even make you buy me a fancy dinner in Westrock,” I joked.
“Sure,” Collum said. “I could do with a little more time in demon Hogsmeade.”
Wait a second. “You mean you read the Harry Potter books?” I asked in shock. I just couldn’t picture it, no matter how hard I tried.
“Sure did,” he said. “They’re silly, I know. Not the most realistic books, that’s for sure. There’s so much she gets wrong about magical schools, but I’m surprised at how many details she gets right. And they’re fun, really. What can I say, Donovan? I’m a fan.”
The thought of beautiful Collum Tavish curling up with a Harry Potter book and thoroughly enjoying it was simply adorable. This dude had layers! A guy whose personality could surprise me in pleasant ways—I didn’t hate it.
“So what house are you?” I said, raising an eyebrow.
Collum’s smile widened. “Guess.”
I actually had to think about it. He had the friendliness of a Hufflepuff, even if his buddies were pure Slytherin. But he didn’t seem quite enough of a pushover, so it’d have to be...
“Gryffindor,” I said. “Am I right?”
Collum did a palms up. “That’s for me to know and you to find out.”
My mouth fell open. “You tricked me!”
He shrugged. “I think we both know you’re a Slytherin.”
I faked looking shocked, but gave it up. “Yeah, I mean...probably. I’ve one an awful lot of conniving in my life.”
Collum laughed, and rubbed his palms along the tops of his thighs. He had those great, broad-palmed guy hands, with just enough freckles.
“So I guess we’re going to be spending a lot of time together,” I went on. “Hopefully it helps you stick it to that bitch.”
He frowned. “Please don’t...call her that. And I already told you, this isn’t about getting revenge or sticking it to her. It’s more...complex.”
I felt bad, but only a little bit. Because if this chick was anything like Camilla—AKA the demon purist I intended to stick it to as part of my end of this deal, when I wasn’t smokescreening Wilder away from me and Raines—she deserved some revenge. “Face it, it’s at least a little bit about that,” I said. “Don’t pretend you’re above being petty. Actually, do the opposite. Embrace the fact that you’re being petty.”
“I’m just trying to teach her a lesson about treating people the right way,” he protested. I could tell he was beginning to get a little flustered. It was the first time I’d ever seen him as anything other than entirely cool and composed.
I made a big dramatic sigh to show my complete disapproval. “Why can’t boys just admit when they’re doing something out of spite? There’s nothing wrong with it. It’s only human!”
“Only human?” he asked with a goofy grin on his face. He had me there.
“Fine. But if anything,” I said, “I’d imagine demons are a million times more spiteful than humans.”
“Fair play, Donovan.” He paused for a moment. “And you’re right, of course. I’m probably being a bit petty, as you say. But not entirely so.”
There was a tinge of melancholy in his voice. One that I hadn’t heard from him before.
“Do you...want to talk about it?” I said. “Because, full disclosure, I’m shit at feelings. I’m not...I don’t have them. Or I don’t know how they work. So if you’re looking for emotional support...”
Collum blinked at me. God, I really needed to try harder at this.
“She really shattered your heart into a million fucking pieces, didn’t she?” I asked.
“She did a real number on me, Donovan, that’s the truth.”
I gave an encouraging smile. “Well, if you ever wanna share the whole story with me...I could try to learn how to be emotionally supportive.”
Collum smiled, in a real way. “Another time, perhaps. Any more rules we need to lay down before we head back on in?”
I gave it a brief thought. “Nah, I think we’re good for now. I’m just excited to see the look on Camilla’s face when she spots us together. She’s gonna think twice before steering into any more bullshit with me. We’ve got a deal, Collum. Should we shake on it?”
“Awfully formal for a romance, don’t you think?” he said, standing up and spreading his arms open. “How about let’s hug on it, eh?”
God, his arms felt good wrapped around me. He was warm and strong, and I imagined how nice it might feel to curl up with him in the common room. I would’ve let him embrace me like that for hours if he hadn’t let go.
Okay, but do not catch real feelings, Nova, I reminded myself. Because right now your focus should be elsewhere. This is just part of a plan.
“Let’s wait ‘til breakfast tomorrow for the reveal,” he said. “And remember, Raines is the only other one in on what we’re actually up to. Don’t go spilling the beans to your pals, Donovan.”
I lifted my hand in a fake Girl Scout salute. “On my life as a Slytherin.”
THE NEXT MORNING, MORGAN made her way to the refectory early, which gave me the perfect opportunity to meet Collum in the common room.
“Just follow my lead,” he said, taking my hand.
It was a bit awkward at first. Heads began to turn immediately, and the whole experience of walking through the halls attached to somebody you weren’t actually in a relationship with was a little off-putting. Still, it’d be a lie to say I didn’t appreciate the attention—or the feel of his hand on mine.
And absolutely nothing could beat the moment when we first stepped into the refectory. It was like a moment out of a movie. Time seemed to slow down as students looked over and began to chatter about what they were seeing. Of course, the conversations were much more about Collum than they were about me. He was one of the members of the infamous Infernal Three, after all. And here he was with a new girl.
I allowed myself to enjoy the moment. And why not? If I was going to do something this ridiculous, I might as well have a little bit of fun with it.
The first face I scanned the crowd for was Camilla’s. I spotted her, along with Zelda and Ruby, over at a table toward the back of the room. But even all the way back there, I could see their mouths agape. They just stared, not saying a word to one another, and I felt proud to have pulled a stunt that finally got her to shut the fuck up for a minute.
Morgan and Teddy were another story. I didn’t feel good about lying to them. If it were possible for them to be in on this, I’d tell them absolutely everything. But the whole point was that this relationship was supposed to make everyone less suspicious about me and Raines...and that included my friends. Still, if being excited nonetheless to see their reactions made me a bad person...well then, maybe I was kind of a bad person.
Collum gave me a tiny peck on the cheek as we parted ways to join our separate groups of friends.
“You absolute minx!” Morgan all but screamed. “I cannot believe this!”
I grabbed my seat. “I don’t know what to say. It just kind of happened.”
She was practically bouncing in her chair with excitement. Meanwhile, Teddy just looked totally bewildered.
“I knew there was more to the story,” she said. “So what happened when he took you aside at the library? Did he give you a big passionate kiss? Details, details!”
“You were right,” I lied. “That’s exactly it.”
This was super entertaining to me, but I still didn’t want to lie more than I had to. I was going to keep my story scant for now.
“Teddy, can you honestly believe this?” Morgan cried. “You’re not looking appropriately shocked. Pay attention!”
Teddy gave his head a little shake. “Oh, uh, no, of course. So is he your...boyfriend?”
I hesitated for just a moment. “Yes.”
“Oh my Gods, I can’t believe it!” Morgan cheered. After drawing some looks, she lowered a voice just a hair. “Look at you! You’ve got t
his weird little triangle going with your professor and his half-brother, but then in the end you make the friend of the half-brother your boyfriend! Girl, you should be on the cover of Messy Bitch Magazine. I love it!” She paused and composed herself. “Of course, I don’t approve of you dating one of those Infernal Three losers, but I have to admit this is juicy. Isn’t it, Teddy?”
Teddy nodded. He looked worn the hell out, for some reason, but really tried to stay game.
“You know, I quite like Collum,” he offered. “He’s always been kind to me.”
So there it was. As far as my best friends were concerned, I had a boyfriend. I prayed to whatever demon gods there were that they’d forgive me if—or inevitably when—Morgan and Teddy learned the truth.
Chapter Eleven
So, just like that, I was somebody’s girlfriend.
At the very least, we finally had that Camilla insurance that Teddy had been hoping for. She hadn't said so much as a word to any of us in the days since Collum and I made it “official.” Not only that, but she didn’t even shoot us nasty looks anymore. It was better than I expected. Who knew having a well-respected full-demon boyfriend would shut her up so thoroughly?
“It’s like we’re finally free,” Teddy said one morning. “Like she doesn’t even exist anymore.”
Honestly, a happier Teddy made for a happier me. He’d been kind of off his game lately, not even wanting to chat much in Latin, which was usually a time to do some socializing. So if pulling back the specter of Camilla hanging over him perked him up, that alone made the Collum relationship well worth it.
I wasn’t the only one who noticed his better spirits, either.
“Our guy seems so much better lately,” Morgan said to me before bed one night. “None of that fake peppiness from earlier in the semester. But also,” she was compelled to say, “don’t think this means I approve of you dating Collum Tavish. We’re just going to consider this a nice unintended consequence of that bizarre decision of yours.”
