by Abbie Lyons
Was he avoiding me?
I brushed off the thought and leapt to my feet.
Morgan had her arms folded across her t-shirt, her face scrunched in thought. “What kind of demon do I want to be? I don’t know if I can ever settle for just one lewk.”
“I can see you being kind of a banshee type,” I said. “You know, long black gown, float a few inches off the ground, pale skin, maybe just holes for eyes...”
“Ooh,” Morgan said. “I like that.” She unfolded her arms, took a power pose like she was Wonder Woman, and dissolved, reforming almost instantly into just that—a creepy, spectral woman with silvery skin and hauntingly sharp cheekbones.
“How do I look?” she asked, her voice grating out like a handful of knife-blades against rocks. I winced.
“I mean, fine, but almost too fine?” I said. “Like I could practically see you on a runway. You’re more Kate Moss than Bloody Mary.”
Morgan harrumphed and snapped back to her usual self. “I guess my heart’s just not in it today.”
“You’re not the only one,” I muttered. Around us, there were some thoroughly unimaginitive transmorphs shaping up, including someone who’d changed into a red-skinned cartoon devil, complete with a little pitchfork.
“You give it a go, then.” Morgan sank to the floor and sat cross-legged, her chin on her hands. “Scare the shit out of me.”
I clenched and unclenched my fists. It wasn’t just that I didn’t think I had the power to transmorph properly—though I was pretty sure I didn’t—it was that I didn’t even know what I wanted to transmorph into. Who was Nova Donovan, the demon? I barely had a good sense of my place in the world before I’d learned I was half-supernatural. And I hadn’t had a ton of choices in how I looked, either, beyond some low-key shoplifting at Duane Reade and a pretty good eye for thrift shops. That, and being too broke for regular meals, can keep a girl looking almost “street chic.”
Now, though, faced with almost unlimited power to change my appearance—in theory, anyway—and finally given a goal bigger than “survival,” I froze up.
Scales didn’t seem my style, although it would have been pretty badass to go full Rogue like I was in the X-Men. Ditto the long icky tongues—I hated the idea of having it all coiled up in my mouth. But the faceless thing, I could get into. And honestly, horns sounded dope, if they could manage to poke out through all my stupid hair.
I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply. I tried to calm my mind, to go back to the place I’d taken myself when I’d channeled outside in the moonlight back in first semester—a lifetime ago. Pinpricks of sensation brushed over my skin. Excited, I opened my eyes, only to feel the pinpricks recede.
And to see Collum Tavish standing right in front of me.
“Tavish,” I said. “Uh, hi.”
Morgan, from her seated position, was craning her neck towards us with interest.
“Hey, Donovan,” Collum said, his usual cheerfulness a bit subdued. He did manage to make the dorky gym uniform look pretty good, though.
“Exetasis stress?” I asked. Collum rubbed the back of his neck, not meeting my eyes.
“Er...sort of.” He looked up, now locking his gaze with mine. “Listen, Nova, I feel like a real lout to have to say this, but I wanted to...well, Aramind and I have been talking again, and she wants to get back together.”
I knew he’d said something big. But my mind was stuck on the fact that he’d said lout. Only Collum Tavish would use a word so polite, so charming, so old-fashioned, to describe what he was doing. Raines would’ve called himself an asshole, or at the very least a jerk, in the same situation. But not Collum. He really was everything that Raines wasn’t.
“Oh,” I said.
“So I suppose I’m—I mean, may as well say it, eh? I’m breaking up with you.” He managed a smile. “I know it’s not a proper breakup, since none of it was, well...proper, really. But after the other night—”
“Why are you getting back together with her?” I blurted out. As my feelings came into sharper and sharper focus, my mind processing, I realized I was a little pissed off—just a little. I mean, I knew the whole thing was fake. It was always fake and it was always going to be fake. No exceptions, not even for a moment. I knew that. But I also kind of knew that Aramind was a jerk, and that I, as it turned out, made a pretty kickass girlfriend.
“I know, it sounds stupid,” Collum said. “But that’s the thing. She came back and apologized for being such a snot. Said she’d never really seen any half-humans up close until she watched us together. Said you weren’t so bad—actually pretty cool. And said if I ever wanted another chance, she was sorry.” His cheeks reddened. “You have to know, I fell hard for her. And this just makes her more...more everything to me.”
My heart squeezed. It was actually hard to breathe. I didn’t know why. I shouldn’t have been upset. But I was. Maybe because the kiss we’d had didn’t count. Or maybe because I really should have kissed someone else that night after all.
Wait a second.
“What about Raines?” I asked. “I mean,” I lowered my voice, “he was part of this thing too, right? Our arrangement? Did you break up with him, too?” It was supposed to be a joke, but it came out with a bit of an edge to it.
“Not in so many words,” Collum said, a dimple springing up as he smiled. “But no, yeah, I did. He said it was okay. Said it was probably a good time anyway.”
A good time? The squeezing in my chest turned to hammering. “I see,” I said, trying to keep my face calm. “Well, great. Nice doing business with you. Not that you paid me, or anything. I’m no Pretty Woman. Do demons know about that movie? Whatever.” Oh my God, Nova, shut your damn mouth. “I wish you and Aramind lots of happiness.” What the hell was that? You sound like a Hallmark card from a grandma.
“Well...thanks, then,” Collum said.
“Nova?” Morgan’s undeniably curious tone drifted up from her seat. “You two okay?”
“I have to get back,” I said to Collum. “Have a nice life.”
I spun and went back to sit with my friend. There was no way I was going to manage a transmorph now. My mind was all over the place.
“Everything all right?” Morgan asked.
“Yeah. I mean, no.” How was a person supposed to act after a breakup? Maybe I could just...go with what I was feeling. Which was confused. “Collum and Aramind are getting back together.”
Morgan’s mouth fell open. “You don’t mean...”
“He dumped me, yeah.” Saying it out loud actually helped. I shrugged. “Whatever. Hos before bros, right?”
“I don’t think that’s the saying,” Morgan said. “Gods, Nova, you all right? I’m so sorry.”
I shrugged again. “I think so. Maybe it’s just going to take a while to hit me. It was probably a good time, anyway.”
“In the middle of Applied Methodology of Terror?!”
“No, no, I just mean...generally.”
Maybe it was a good time. Or maybe it was exceptionally bad. Either way, Aramind notwithstanding, the timing wasn’t a total coincidence.
And I had to find out why.
Chapter Nineteen
I managed to get through the rest of my classes somehow. I guess everyone else being majorly freaked about the exetasis results was a good way for me to hide in plain sight with my own anxieties. And I wasn't not stressed about the results, either.
After dinner, where I barely ate anything, I was ready to find Raines. I'd been ready to find him, really, but now it was time to devote some actual brain power to it. Because of his annoying habit of just popping out of nowhere whenever he wanted to talk to me, I had no idea what areas he frequented when he wasn't somewhere logical, and as shown by the secret-ice-cave-potion-storage-room incident, he had a freakishly encyclopedic knowledge of all the hiding places in Hades.
Morgan decided to stash away in our bedroom with a stinging nettle face mask—"it's relaxing, Nova, I swear!"—to indulge in some self-care, and so a
s soon as I told her goodnight, I was on my own. I changed out of my uniform and into jeans and a V-neck, although I briefly entertained the idea of wearing my clean gym shirt just for kicks.
Back in the common room, I tried to focus. You'd think that being soul bound to someone would let you zoom in on their exact location, but the connection was frustratingly murky: all noise, barely any signal. A quick scan of the common room turned up no Raines, just a few odd pockets of people halfheartedly skimming through textbooks and swapping illicit sips of booze. Just another way demon school wasn't so different from human college.
Against my better instincts, my eyes were irresistibly drawn to the corner where the Infernal Three usually hung out. Raines wasn't there—of course it wasn't going to be that simple to find him—but neither, surprisingly, was Collum.
No, I corrected myself. Not surprising at all. He and Aramind were probably off banging in her room or something.
I felt bad as soon as I had that thought. Collum, he of the use of "lout," was not someone who'd use the word "banging." That was definitely more of a Raines word.
Okay, brain, how about we stop thinking about banging any of the Infernal Three?
"You are looking for someone?"
I jolted. Aleksandr, the 1/3 of the Three who was actually present in the common room, looked up from what appeared to be a single-player mode of demon chess and cocked his head at me.
"Well...yes," I said, not quick enough to come up with a lie. Aleksandr was still the biggest mystery of the three to me, which, considering I'd been in some literally intimate situations with both of the other two, wasn't really saying much. Still, he and I had probably exchanged, what, three sentences the entire time I'd been at Hades?
"Your boyfriend is not here," he went on. My face flamed.
"He's not my boyfriend anymore," I said. "In case you didn't know."
"I did know. But I wanted to see if you did. And you do." He shifted forward in his seat, elbows on his knees, his lower lip just slightly curled. He had changed out of the uniform, too, and into black jeans and his heather-gray T-shirt—which, for a second, I thought was the gym shirt from Methodology of Terror. Except that slick Aleksandr would never wear something like that unless absolutely mandated. Hell, even his jeans looked like they cost more than my entire pre-Hades wardrobe. "So can I help you, then?"
"Maybe," I said. "Where's Raines?"
Aleksandr lifted a shoulder, a bored-yet-elegant shrug. "Don't know. Not his babysitter.”
"Thanks," I said. "Really helpful."
I sighed, and looked over my shoulder. The common room was still mostly empty, and I doubted Raines was about to just stroll in any minute. If I just randomly poked in every corridor I could find, I'd probably starve to death before I'd found all the secret passages and rooms in Hades Academy, let alone figure out where Raines was.
"You know," Aleksandr's voice came from behind me. "He might be studying."
"Studying?" I said, almost laughing as the words fell out. "Raines? He hasn't even been in class for the past few days."
Aleksandr shrugged again. "I only know he goes to the library quite often. If he doesn't study there, he doesn't study there."
The library. That would be a pretty good place to hide in plain sight. Especially if he was up to something that needed...I don't know, resources.
"Thanks," I said. "I think."
Ten minutes later, I pushed open the thick double doors of the library and cast my gaze around. It was quieter than usual, but not by much, and Madame Lyra looked almost asleep behind her polished wooden desk. Perfect. I slipped in through the threshold and immediatley ducked into a side passage formed by two tall bookshelves, glancing at every study table as I passed. A few had students, and even a few of those students were awake, but none had the distinctive messy dark hair and about-to-glow-red eyes that I was looking for.
Wait. Duh.
I picked up my pace and strode past my usual study table with Morgan and Teddy, which—
...wasn't empty. Teddy was there by himself, laboring over what looked like a textbook for Fulguration. The memory of his giant electric bolt in class zapped into my mind. What had been up with that, anyway? Maybe he really had been hitting the books without us. I couldn't say I blamed him.
I hurried on, through another few rows of shelves and finally to my destination: the study rooms. Sure enough, only one was lit, with a single occupant. I hesitated only a bit, only half remembering how to get the damn thing back to the ground, and then waited as the caravan descended, with Raines inside.
The room creaked to a stop and he raised his head just as it touched the floor.
"Hey," I said. "Can I join you?"
Raines blinked, then nodded—no snark, no fight, no nothing, just stood and opened the door for me.
"Thanks."
"Welcome." He sank back into his chair. Papers and books were strewn everywhere, and even a few snack wrappers peeked out here and there. It was chaos—small ‘c.’
"No offense," I said. "But this place looks like his office."
"Whose?"
I raised my eyebrows.
"Oh." Raines squinted his own eyes shut. "Shit. Well, we're related. I don't know. What the hell can I do about it?" He shrugged, but not in the cocky way Aleksandr had shrugged. In a worn-out way. "What were you going to say?"
"I..." I frowned. "Were you going to say something?"
"I'll wait."
I sputtered a sigh. "Okay, fine. Collum—"
"—he broke up with you," Raines finished. "Yeah, I know."
"I know you know," I said. "I want to know why you said it would be a good time for him to do it."
"He told you that?"
"Not in so many words—no, wait, yes, exactly that. So I'm assuming that's exactly what you told him."
Raines said nothing, just stared intently at the chandelier illuminating the room, small flecks of light catching in his golden eyes. "Yeah. It was a good time. Because you're about to be in a lot more danger."
"You don't say?" I said. "More than usual?"
"Why is everything a joke with you?" Raines said, swiveling back to face me. "You know death is a real thing, right? That people can and do die? That demons can?"
The memory of the tarot card shimmered in my mind. "Yes," I said. "Of course. Humor is a coping mechanism. Something you might know about if you'd ever bothered to try and sort your own shit out."
Raines ignored that. "Do you want to hear what's going on, or not?"
I eyed the piles of papers and books. "Assuming it's also an explanation for this ungodly mess, then...yes."
Raines let out a long breath. "So, first of all, you're welcome for doing all this work."
I rolled my eyes.
"It's not easy to figure this shit out," Raines said. "All the classes and hierarchies, the inverses..."
"It's a lot easier when you show up to class," I said. "Professor Mantel has actually been covering a lot of it."
Raines opened his mouth, then shut it. "Okay. Whatever. My point is this." He held up his hand, his palm facing mine. With his index finger, he tapped the intersection of two lines in the center of his displayed hand. "Remember this?"
"The outlaw's crossing," I said. I held up my own hand, unfolded my palm in front of my eyes. I could barely see the crossing—the chandelier light was actually pretty terrible for seeing clearly—but it was there, all right. I hadn't forgotten what it was, although it'd honestly been a while since I'd thought about it. Wilder had seemed to think it was something last semester, after my exetasis...and then Raines confirmed it. Because he knew about it pretty well himself.
"So we both have one," Raines said, clenching his hand back into a fist. "And for a long time, I assumed mine came about because of...what I am. Who I am. And I figured that was why Wilder was obsessed with it—because he's my half-brother, and so maybe it was something he could've gotten, but didn't. And then this important mark of power turns up on the bastard...well, I
thought that'd explain a lot."
The room lurched.
"But then why would I have one too?" I asked. "I'm not related to either of you, I don't think."
I looked out the window. We were moving again, towards the ground. Were we supposed to be doing that?
Raines didn’t seem to notice or care. "Trust me, you're not. So that's the thing. I looked into it. It has to do with demonological hierarchies—inverses. Wilder has the opposite marking, the hermit’s arch. It comes along with reduced power, believe it or not."
"I don't," I said. "Believe it, that is. I've seen the guy in action, and he's not powerless."
"Not now," Raines said. "But he naturally has some deficiencies. The only reason he's as powerful as he is now is because he like...does the demon equivalent of working out. He trains like crazy. Hades Academy can turn you into a grade-A demon if you study hard."
"Literally," I said. "Not that you'd know anything about getting As."
The downward motion of our cell was making my stomach a little uneasy. I threw another glance out the window. What if someone caught us here? Not that being in the library was in and of itself suspicious. Unless you were Raines, I guessed, in which case it would seem highly unusual.
"Anyway,” Raines said. “If the outlaw's crossing shows up on a woman...it indicates something else. That maybe she's his inverse."
"So I'm...the anti-Wilder? And what the hell is Wilder, for that matter?"
"A Duke," Raines said. "He's never let me forget it, either. Duke of Oriax. I'm not expecting a title like that, by the way. I have basically no expectations. That's why I'm the only person not worried about my exetasis results."
"Humblebrag much?" I muttered. "Okay, so if he's the Duke of Oriax, and I'm the inverse, then that makes me, what, the Duchess of Oriax?"
"No," Raines said. "I thought you were paying attention in class? That’s not how inverses work. Your title would be Duchess, yes, but Duchess of some other place. Hundreds of demons have the title of duke or duchess, so knowing which of those might be your exact inverse isn’t so easy. Anyway, yes he might be yours, but that’s just a theory. It would at least explain why he wants to kill you.”
