by Lynne Silver
“People do that in the movies?” It was kind of thrilling to hear her refer to masturbation, but he was worried she’d hate him if she knew how frequently he jacked off, as she called it. Having no outlet for his burgeoning sexual needs, he was forced to hide in the bathroom at least once a day.
“No. Most people don’t do that in the movies. Only perverts do it in public. It’s something that’s best done in the privacy of your own home.”
“Is that where you do it?”
Silence from her.
“Allison? Did I lose you?”
“No, I’m still here. I, um, Peter, that’s not something people really talk about.”
“Oh. Sorry.”
“Do you?” she blurted.
“Do I what, talk about it?”
“No, jack off.”
Now it was his turn to be silent. He decided to tell the truth, because he couldn’t have a future with Allison anyway. Would it make a huge difference if his confession ended things sooner rather than later? “I did this morning.”
“Oh?” She sounded intrigued, not upset.
“I thought about you and what we did yesterday.”
“That’s actually kind of romantic,” she said. “I’ve never had a guy actually admit it before.”
“I thought about how much I liked it and wanted to see you again.”
“To have sex?” she asked.
“Yeah, but also I want to spend more time with you.”
“I’m not working tomorrow,” she offered. “We could meet for lunch, or maybe drive over to Annapolis.”
He thought quickly. There was a training session early in the morning and nothing too important after lunch. “Should I pick you up?”
“No, I can meet you there.” She gave him the location, and he committed it to memory. “See you tomorrow.”
“See you.” He hung up with a huge grin on his face. He was seeing Allison again, and no one on campus was going to stop him.
Peter found a parking spot in the quaint crowded waterfront village of Annapolis. Getting off campus had been easier than he’d dared dream. He’d simply informed his commanding officer he was leaving, grabbed the car keys and left. He looked around curiously, knowing that the town had a long history in the US and was home to the US Naval Academy. His comrades in arms, one might say.
Slowly, he made his way up the street, knowing he had time to spare. He was fifteen minutes ahead of the time Allison had planned to meet, but it was better this way since he didn’t want to keep her waiting.
Instead, he was kept waiting nearly thirty minutes. He was about to give up and go find a pay phone when she came dashing through the entrance of the coffee shop where he’d been sipping a Tab.
“I’m so sorry I’m late. I got into it with my parents, and, well, never mind. I’m here now.” Today her platinum blonde hair was in a high messy pony tail, and she had thick bracelets almost like cuffs on both wrists. She was a little taller than he remembered thanks to her high heeled ankle boots.
He’d stood the second she rushed through the doorway. She walked into his waiting arms now, and it seemed the most natural thing to lower his head and find her mouth for a kiss. He was new in the public world, but even he knew there were acceptable greeting kisses, and then there were kisses that were best saved for the privacy of your bedroom. Their kiss was of the latter variety.
“Wow,” she whispered when they at last separated and stared into each other’s faces. “Good to see you, too.”
“Let’s sit,” Peter said, gesturing to the table. The kiss had hit him hard, and it was embarrassing standing in the middle of the restaurant with an erection popping out of his khaki shorts.
“No,” she said. “I can’t be inside. I need to walk off some of my anger.” Her hands fisted and she groaned. “I’m sorry. I’m being a pain. My mom just really got to me, you know.”
He swallowed and tried to tamp down the arousal and pay attention to her words. She was visibly upset about her family, and he found himself wanting to help, not that he could do much. He could barely manage his own life and was constantly acceding to the wishes of others. “Sure, let’s head down to the water. I’ll just pay.”
He tossed a few dollars on the table and grabbed her hand to guide her out. The water and harbor were visible the moment they stepped out into the June sun. Her grip on his hand relaxed with every step toward the water.
“What happened with your parents that has you so upset?” he asked.
“I don’t want to talk about it. It’s a gorgeous day, and I’m here with you. I don’t want them messing it up.”
“I’ve heard talking about things can make you feel better.”
She threw him a sidelong look. “You don’t really want to hear about my problems, do you?”
He stopped walking and turned her to face him. People brushed past them on the narrow sidewalk, but he only had eyes for her. “I do want to hear. I want to know all about you, Allison.”
She leaned up on tiptoe to kiss him briefly on the lips. He could taste the saltiness of tears mingled with her lip gloss. “You’re too good to be true. I’m going to find out you’re some kind of serial killer, aren’t I?”
He kept silent. Killer, yes. Serial, no. Though he had yet to test his killer skills. He honestly wasn’t sure if he could take another human life. Shooting targets on paper was one thing. They didn’t bleed.
Allison didn’t notice his hesitation and started walking again toward the water. They had to skirt around a few bicycle racks and a mom pushing a stroller. “My parents have high expectations for me,” she finally said.
“I know how that is,” he said.
“Yet you managed not to go to college,” she said. She’d misunderstood. His father and commanding officers had a high bar for him, and it had nothing to do with higher education. He shrugged in response to her statement. He didn’t want the focus on his life, because he had no idea what to tell her.
“Both my parents are professors at the University of Maryland.”
“That’s right near where I live,” he said, before thinking better of it.
“Oh. We must be neighbors. We live close to campus also.”
He doubted they were any kind of neighbors. He lived on a fenced-in military compound disguised as a generic government office building complex.
“Anyway, their whole lives are academia, and they can’t imagine how I’ll function without a college degree. They actually enrolled me for the fall semester. Can you believe it? They said I could minor in music.” Her voice grew higher and shriller.
“Why is that bad?”
“Peter,” she groaned. “I want to be a singer. I don’t need four more years of sitting in a classroom. I need to be in clubs and jamming with a band.”
“Like CBGB in New York,” he remembered.
“Exactly like that. But if I don’t earn enough money to get to New York before September, I’m going to have to go to college or my parents will make my life a living hell. I should move out. I would’ve already, except living rent free is helping me save my money.”
“Sounds like your parents want what’s best for you,” he said. They’d arrived at the harbor and he stared out at all the small white boats bobbing in the inky water. There was a slight breeze and the metal groaning of sailboat’s booms shifting sounded.
“Peter, don’t be a spaz. They think they know what’s best, but I know. I have to live my own life.”
“Couldn’t you go to college and try to be a singer at the same time? Why does it have to be an either-or situation?”
“You sound like my mother.” She stepped away from him, and her body language was stiff and unyielding. He stared unhappily at the back of her hot pink tank top wondering what he’d said wrong. It physically hurt to have her distant from him.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I’m trying to understand, but I’m new to this world.”
She spun back to face him. “You’re always making yourself sound l
ike some kind of alien. I don’t believe in that Star Wars kind of stuff.”
“Have you seen Star Wars?” he asked eagerly, ignoring everything else she’d said. Even he had read about the blockbuster in the newspaper and was dying to see it.
“Hellooo? Peter, I work in a movie theater. Of course I’ve seen it. Empire Strikes Back only came out last month. Everyone in the free world has seen it.”
“I haven’t.”
She blinked at him. “For real?”
He nodded.
“That’s like…really sad. If you want, we can go see it together.”
He mimicked her. “For real? Tomorrow?”
She laughed, “Sure.” And then her face fell again. “Do you think I should go to college? Maybe I am being stupid about becoming a singer. It’s like a one in a million shot.”
He couldn’t stand seeing self-doubt on her face. Her bravado was her biggest attraction. “I think you can be anything you choose to be, and if you want to be a singer more than you want to go to college, you should go for it.”
The beaming smile was back on her face. He barely had time to catch her before she’d leapt into his arms and planted kisses all over his face. When it seemed she was going to pull back, he cuddled her close and deepened the kiss. He’d been thinking about kissing her ever since he’d left her last night. He couldn’t get enough.
He abandoned any sense of propriety and devoured her mouth, pulling her tightly against his body letting her feel how much he wanted her. Her little murmurs and throaty rumbles of pleasure went to his head like the beer he’d once drunk. The doctors had wanted to see how alcohol affected him, so they’d sat him down with a six pack of beer and got him drunk, making scientific observations all the while. Analysis showed he got drunk like a normal man of his weight. What would the docs think of his lightheadedness at a simple kiss?
Except there was nothing simple about kissing Allison. She was the air he needed to breathe, the water he needed to live.
“Get a room,” an ugly voice behind him called.
“Or better yet, let us take a turn when you’re done with her.”
Peter gently but rapidly pulled away from Allison and turned to judge the threat. Three men, around his age, grinned ugly smiles at him. “Don’t talk about her like that,” he said softly.
“Or what?” the biggest of the three said. He was about an inch taller than Peter and outweighed him. “You gonna take us?”
“Not if I don’t have to,” he replied.
Allison tugged at the back of his shirt. “Come on, Peter. Let’s get out of here.”
“Yeah, Peter. Run home. But leave her. She’ll have more fun with us.” The guy’s voice was mocking, and Peter wanted to punch him, but he was holding back for now.
“I don’t think so,” he said, noting Allison’s pulling at his shirt was more insistent.
“Peter, let’s go,” she said.
The fear in her voice was his undoing. Red rage bled into his vision and a buzzing in his ears deafened him to anything but the need to defend his woman. A mental warning popped in his brain that physically engaging with these jerks was as bad an idea as President Carter’s handling of the hostages in Iran. But the warning was ignored when one of the men stepped close and pushed hard against Peter’s upper chest.
“Step back,” he said quietly to Allison. And when she was safely out of striking zone, he proceeded to do what he’d been bred to do. Kick some serious ass. It almost wasn’t fair, even with the numbers against him. The three men were tough in a high school locker room sort of way. They’d never skimmed the surface of the kind of training Peter had been taught since his toddler years.
It was over in less than a minute, and all three men were down.
“Peter,” Allison said with a gasp. “How…” Her eyes were wide, and she looked more frightened now than when they’d first been approached by the wannabe tough guys.
“They’re all still alive,” he said, surprised his voice sounded calm. White-hot fury raced through his veins at his first challenge outside a staged environment. He wanted more. He wanted to run through Annapolis taking on anyone who breathed the wrong way.
“I’ve never seen anyone fight like that except in a Chuck Norris movie.”
“Who’s Chuck Norris?” he asked, but she didn’t answer. She hadn’t moved her gaze off the three men on the ground who were groaning and holding various body parts that would be bruised tomorrow, but not broken. Even in his rage, he’d been careful to do no permanent harm.
“Do we need to call the police?” she asked.
“No.” His response was quick and curt. He could not risk even brushing past local law enforcement. He’d never be allowed off campus again. “I think we should leave.” Without waiting for her answer, he grabbed her hand and walked her back in the direction of her car. This afternoon had not gone the way he’d hoped. He’d planned on finding a private place to talk and kiss Allison, and instead he’d nearly risked his identity by getting in a fight in a public place.
“Peter, slow down. I can’t keep up.” Allison was running alongside him, and he lessened his pace a fraction. “Are you okay?” she chattered, but he didn’t answer. The adrenaline from the fight still pumped inside him, and it needed an outlet. He was afraid he’d release the steam by grabbing Allison and taking her as he had yesterday up against the nearest tree.
The memory of taking her up against the tree had kept him up for hours at night. It had been as if he’d been watching a movie of some cool guy who had lots of experience with women. But his body had gone on autopilot. There’d been no premeditated thinking, just wanting and then grabbing her and more sex.
“Which car is yours?” he asked curtly, and she pointed to an old blue Buick wagon with wood panels parked across the street. He cut across the middle of the street, half dragging her alongside him. He opened her car door and practically pushed her inside. “I’ll call you later,” he said.
“Peter…” she called after him, but he was halfway to his own car already.
Allison sat in her car, hands on the steering wheel to keep them from shaking any harder. What the hell had just happened? Her perfect date had turned into a nightmare. She’d teased Peter about being an alien, but after seeing him take on three men and beat them with ease, she might have to reassess her stance on paranormal activity. What he’d done hadn’t been quite human. If he’d offered an explanation or comforted her after the fight, maybe she wouldn’t be alone in her car about to cry. But no, he’d run off as if there were a fire under his ass, and this time she didn’t believe him when he said he’d call.
More to the point, she wasn’t sure she’d answer if he did call. He’d freaked her out.
Eventually she made it home, climbed the stairs to her room, and burrowed under her covers. Eight hours later she was awoken by a light touch on her cheek. She blinked, then sat straight up. A large hand covered her mouth before she could scream.
“Allison, it’s me, Peter.”
She was too young to have a heart attack, but that didn’t stop the organ from pounding a beat harder than Led Zeppelin’s drummer. She grabbed at his hand, and when he moved it away from her mouth, she whispered, “What are you doing here? How did you get in?”
It was hard to see him in the shadowy dark of her room, but she thought he shrugged. “You saw what I can do this afternoon. Entering your house is nothing. Especially since you don’t have an alarm.”
Okay, now she was freaked, and having seen his martial arts demonstration earlier, she knew there wasn’t a chance of escaping, and yet she couldn’t take her eyes off him. The majority of her brain was screaming stalker—call the police, but this was Peter, the boy she’d trusted to make love in the woods.
“Don’t be scared.” He scooted back to the foot of the bed, and she immediately backed up until her spine aligned with her headboard, her arms curled around her knees. “I won’t hurt you. I would never hurt you,” he whispered gently.
&nbs
p; She didn’t relax her pose and remained straining to see him in the dark.
“Shoot,” he muttered, and her mattress lurched slightly as he stood. “I scared you this afternoon, and I’m scaring you more now. I’m sorry. I’ll go. You never have to see me again.”
“Wait,” she cried as he was reaching the door to her bedroom. The fact that he was ready to leave reassured her he meant her no harm. She watched his dark shadowy form freeze and spin back to face her. “It’s okay; you can stay.”
Slowly he stepped to her bed and eased himself down. It was a narrow twin bed, and Peter’s huge body dwarfed the small mattress. “I shouldn’t have come to see you, but I couldn’t stay away,” he said. “We can’t ever have something long-term between us, but I didn’t want to end things the way we did.”
“Why?”
“Because you were scared of me.”
“No, I meant why can’t we ever have something long-term, but yes, you scared the hell out of me. Where did you learn to fight like that?”
He was silent for a while, obviously struggling with what to tell her.
“You told me you were in training. Are you training to be a boxer?”
“Not quite, but close enough. And the training is why this thing between us can’t go further. There are all these expectations for me, and I don’t want you caught up in it.”
He was trying to protect her? From what? She’d made it pretty clear she was open to a fun summer fling, not looking for marriage. Still, it hurt that he was ruling out something long-term before they’d even begun. And his cryptic words about training and getting caught up in his world kind of freaked her out. She pulled the covers up over her knees protectively.
Peter leaned in until their faces were inches apart. “I am nothing like the other guys you know. If my life were my own, I’d buy you a house in the suburbs and marry you and make babies. But I don’t have that to offer you, and, trust me, you don’t want what I have to offer.”
