by Katee Robert
I half expect Beast to say no. He’s been right there with us all day, but something remains held apart. I don’t know what it is. Beast has always been a mystery to me. Even when he’s fucking me, he’s holding back. It’s part of what attracted me to him in the first place, but mysteries were meant to be discovered, a trail of answers through the years until you get to the very heart of them. With Beast, I never made it past the first layer.
He doesn’t say no. He simply steps out of the lounge pants and into the tub, settling opposite us so that all our legs end up tangled together. It feels weirdly right, but even in my blissed out state, I know better than to say as much. The rift between these men didn’t start with me, but my presence made it worse.
Another sin to lay at my feet, another form of penance to make. Another apology presses against the inside of my lips. Beast’s gaze lands on me and he shakes his head. “Stop that.”
“Stop what?”
“If you want to be flogged, one of us will be the one to do it. You don’t need to mentally flog yourself over the past.”
Irritation rises, but it doesn’t quite drown out the guilt. “If I hadn’t made mistakes, you two wouldn’t have basically strong-armed me into a sex pact to punish me.”
Beast gives that infuriating small smile and stretches his arms over the side of the tub. “Fuck yes, you made mistakes, Isabelle. You weren’t the only one, though.” His gaze flicks to Gaeton and then back to me. “Did you ever think that we offered the sex pact because we wanted to?”
He’s simplifying things and ignoring the anger that’s laced so many of our interactions since I showed up in the Underworld. I narrow my eyes. “Am I the only one required to be honest in this scenario?”
“Yes.” His gives a dry laugh at my outraged expression. “Tell her, Gaeton.”
The big man shifts against my back. “Speak for yourself. I was angry.”
“Was?” Beast lifts his brows.
“Stop twisting my words, asshole. I still am.” His touch is gentle on me. “But you’re right. It took three people making mistakes to get us to that point.”
Relief courses through me. At least we’re all on the same page there. It’s the tiniest of steps, but one we’ve taken together. I don’t know what it means for the future. There’s still the deadline bearing down on us, the choice I’ll be forced to make. Even if we move past the sins of the past, at the end of these two weeks, half my heart will be walking away from me. It’s just a matter of which half.
I don’t realize I’ve started to shake again until Gaeton gathers me close. “Stop thinking so hard. Enjoy the aftermath, let the hot water soak out some of the soreness, and then we’ll feed you.”
My stomach chooses that moment to growl uncomfortably loud. We took a small break for food earlier today, but I was too out of my head to eat a proper meal. Still … “I don’t understand how you can just focus on the here and now and worry about everything later.”
“Who said we’re doing anything of the sort?” Beast shakes his head. “We have a lot of shit to wade through, Isabelle. A lot. We treated you like spun gold, but you weren’t exactly honest, either. Did you ever actually tell either of us what you wanted, in the bedroom or out of it?”
My flushed skin has nothing to do with the heat of the water and everything to do with embarrassment. “Not exactly.” When he just watches me, I feel compelled to elaborate. “At first, I liked the pedestal you both put me on. But the longer it went on, the more I felt constrained by it. Every time I even tried to suggest something, I was shot down.” Could I have been more explicit? Probably, but my pride wouldn’t allow it. Even as I was starving for the things I needed, I’d somehow decided it was a better option than begging one or both of them to fuck me dirty. “Do you remember the dressing room when you were escorting me to pick out the gown for Sienna’s birthday party?” I had opened the door wearing only a pair of thigh highs and pulled him in with me for a quickie, except Beast just pressed a soft kiss to my lips and told me to get dressed before we were late.
That makes him look away. “Like I said; mistakes on all sides.”
We sit together until the water starts to cool and then Gaeton passes me to Beast and stands. I start to argue that I’m more than capable of moving my body around, but the sight of him rising out of the water like some kind of barbarian god stills my protests. Why waste energy arguing when I can enjoy the view?
He steps out of the tub and snags a couple of towels. I’m distantly aware of Beast going perfectly still behind me, but I’m too caught up in my voyeuristic tendencies to think about it too hard until his lips brush my ear. “He’s beautiful, isn’t he?”
I don’t know if beautiful is the right word for Gaeton. Beast is beautiful with his perfect cheekbones and model good looks. Gaeton is … “Powerful.” He looks like he’d be at home on an ancient battlefield, swinging an oversized ax and soaked in the blood of his enemies.
“Yes, powerful.” Beast’s rough voice goes the slightest bit deeper. “Thick thighs, thick torso, thick neck, thick fucking everything.”
Gaeton catches us watching him and frowns. “What are you two up to?”
“Nothing right now.” Beast answers for both of us. He gives me a nudge and I rise up on wobbling legs to allow Gaeton to wrap me in a surprisingly fluffy towel. He ignores my attempts to take it from him and dries me off while I stand there, feeling silly and cosseted.
And loved.
I swallow hard. “You know I’m not a doll you need to cart around and move yourself, right? I’m more than capable of taking care of myself.”
He looks up from where he’s gone to one knee before me to dry my legs. The position is another echo of the past, of the moment when our carefully balanced act went spinning into ruin.
Marry me, Isabelle.
No. I can’t. I won’t.
The stark pain that flashes through his dark eyes lets me know he’s remembering the same thing. He stands slowly and tucks the towel around me. “I like taking care of you.” He speaks so low, I have no idea if it carries to Beast where he’s drying off a few feet away. “I want to do it, so I do. It has nothing to do with what you’re capable of.” Layers upon layers within those words. I’m afraid to dig past the surface for fear of what I might find.
I don’t know what I’m supposed to say to that, so I just nod. It’s enough for now. He disappears into his closet and returns wearing sweatpants and holding a T-shirt. This, at least, he allows me to pull on myself. It hits my knees, and the feeling of being wrapped up in Gaeton’s clothes is so bittersweet, tears prick the backs of my eyes. I clutch the fabric to me. “I missed this.”
“Me, too.” He passes a second pair of pants to Beast. “I’ll get food started.”
It’s only when he walks out of the bathroom that I realize he’s intentionally left us alone. My stomach does an uncomfortable flip as I look at Beast. He’s swimming in Gaeton’s pants, but it doesn’t seem to bother him in the least. Then again, nothing bothers Beast. He’s unflappable.
I force myself to stop clutching Gaeton’s T-shirt. “I’m afraid.”
“I know.” He crosses the distance between us and takes my face in his hands. Even as his thumbs coast over cheekbones, part of me is all too aware of the violence he’s done with them. Violence that he’s never once turned on me. That knowledge feels strangely like power, and I drink it up. It’s something I’ve always loved about both men, but with Beast, the difference is so stark. He leans forward and presses a kiss to my forehead. “Trust me, princess. I have this all under control.”
I’m not sure I believe him, but I’m exhausted. Handing off worrying about the future feels good right now. Maybe I’ll regret it tomorrow. Maybe I’ll wake up ready to draw my own personal line in the sand and refuse to budge. Tonight, I just want him to take care of everything.
To take care of me.
I nod against his hold. “Okay. I trust you.”
“Good girl.” There it is again,
that flicker of true warmth in his blue eyes. “Let’s get you fed.”
We find Gaeton in the kitchen, lining up stuff for sandwiches. He catches me looking and shrugs almost self-consciously. “I’ll put together a real meal tomorrow.”
I try for a smile. “This looks perfect.” Things feel so fragile right now, like one wrong word will splinter our tentative peace into a thousand shards.
We are silent as we put together our respective sandwiches. One for me. Two each for them. Silent as we eat. Silent as we clean up what little dishes there are. Just when I think I might scream from the glaring lack of communication we’re capable of without someone being naked, the door’s buzzer goes off.
Instantly, both men are on high alert. I barely register the sound when Gaeton steps in front of me, like someone is going to announce themselves before they blow a hole in the fortified doorframe. I peek around him to see Beast stalk to the buzzer like he expects it to explode, too. He presses the button. “Yes?”
A tinny male voice answers. “I have the delivery you requested this morning.”
That sounds suspicious as hell, but Beast nods. “Bring it up.”
Two tense minutes later, there’s a knock on the door. Gaeton shifts slightly and I catch sight of metal in his hand. Where the hell did he pull the gun from? He must have it hidden somewhere in the kitchen because there’s no way he was hiding it in his sweatpants. Without looking, he snags my hip and pushes me back behind him, using his body to shield me. As a result, I only hear the door open and low voices as Beast confers with whoever is handling the delivery. Three slow exhales later and the door closes.
Gaeton still doesn’t relax. “Check it.”
“Already on it.” Rustling. Beast curses. “No nasty surprises, but a little birdie left a message.”
Gaeton does some creative cursing of his own. “Bring it here.” He finally steps to the side, allowing me a full view of the room. There are two small suitcases laying open on the ground, plain black and utterly indistinguishable from thousands of others like them. I recognize some of Beast’s clothing, but that’s not where my attention lands. It’s on the pretty blue card in his hands. As he crosses to the kitchen peninsula, I recognize the stylized blue seashell on the front of it. “Ursa.”
“Yes.” Beast sets it on the counter and spins it to face us. “The Sea Witch sends her regards, apparently.”
I read the flowing script and then reread a second and third time.
Congratulations on your reconciliation with the little princess. It would be a shame for such an epic love story to end in anything other than a happily ever after.
On the surface, it looks like a friendly overture, but I know better.
It’s a flat-out threat.
Chapter 15
Gaeton
We manage to distract Isabelle until exhaustion takes hold and she passes out between us in bed. She looks younger and more relaxed in sleep, her chest rising and falling in an even rhythm. Less formidable somehow. We worked her hard today, hard enough that I should be passed out right next to her. I’m tired right down to my bones, but it has barely taken the edge off my need for her. I’ve always liked to fuck, but it’s on a different level with this woman.
With both of them.
I can admit that to myself even if I’d walk through fire before I admit it to Beast. It feels natural to trade dominance back and forth between the two of us. And what happened this morning? It’s still got me twisted up. Having my mouth all over Beast was something I’ve wanted for longer than I’ll ever admit. He’s not for me. He never was.
That’s not what we need to talk about right now, though.
I pull the sheet up more firmly around Isabelle and lean back. “Ursa knows where we are.”
“It would seem so.” He sits against the headboard, his muscles shifting beneath his scarred skin. There’s a wealth of information in those scars, if one knows how to look. Shit he’s survived left people around him six feet under. He doesn’t need to tell me the stories, to put names and faces to the loss, for me to understand. I really don’t want to understand Beast, but that resistance gets weaker and weaker the more time we spend together. There was a point where I would have happily put a bullet between his eyes just to get him the fuck out of my way, but it’s been a long time since I felt that level of anger. It slipped away while I wasn’t paying attention, swept out to sea on a wave of grief and loss.
I push the thoughts away. There’s no time to drown in that grief right now, not the grief of losing Isabelle the first time and sure as fuck not the loss of Orsino Belmonte. “Is she warning us off or is she going to strike at us directly?”
“The latter is what I would do.” Beast isn’t looking at me, his eyes focused on something a thousand miles away. “We’re both damn good generals, but we represent more than that. Cordelia already has a handful of damn good generals who could ensure she didn’t feel our loss too strongly. The Man in Black—” His voice hitches the tiniest amount. “Orsino left a strong and stable territory when he died. Strong enough to survive the changeover to his daughter and give her time to settle in.” He finally looks at me. “Or it would have been if we hadn’t left.”
He’s right. There are other generals, but we’re different. We’re symbols of a sort. Two men with reputations that stretch the distance of the city and give pause to anyone who considers crossing us. If we hadn’t walked out … But we did, and now we have to deal with the consequences.
I drag a hand through my hair. “Did you know how little time he had left?” I knew he was sick. Everyone knew he was sick. But up until three days before he died, he was sitting in a meeting with the two of us just like he had a thousand times before. He’d looked frailer than normal, but he hadn’t breathed a single fucking word to let me know that he was that close to the end.
“No. He didn’t tell me, either.” His voice is perfectly devoid of emotion. Once, I thought that meant Beast didn’t feel a damn thing. Now I know better. He feels just as deeply as I do. He just hides it better.
“I thought we had months left, years even. The last treatment seemed like it was working.” My chest feels like someone dug a hole in it and forgot to toss me into my grave. That man was not perfect, and there were days when I hated him, but he was as close to a father figure as I’ve ever had. “I couldn’t stay there. I just needed some fucking time to work shit out.”
“It felt like the walls were closing in.” He speaks so softly, I can’t tell if the words are meant for me or himself. Beast tilts his head back against the headboard and looks at the ceiling. “It was like losing Cohen all over again; different, but the same, too.”
There was a time not that long ago when I would have ignored this new piece of information. Where I didn’t want to know more about Beast, because it’s easier to hate a near-stranger, even if they’re a brother-in-arms. I’m not there right now. I crave getting inside his head in a way I’m not prepared to examine too closely. “Cohen is from your time before Carver City.”
“Yeah.” He’s still not looking at me, still speaking softly. “He was someone very important to me. He and his six brothers were set to take over their part of Sabine Valley when they were driven out. His enemies were hunting him, and we ended up separated.” He exhales slowly. “He was supposed to meet me here in Carver City, but he never made it.”
I was rising up the ranks when Beast arrived in the city and landed in our territory. He’s cold now, but he could damn near freeze a room back then. He scared the shit out of people, which only led to a whole lot of confusion when Isabelle took up with him. It didn’t make him less scary, but it sure as fuck made people more cautious about dealing with her.
Comfort has never been my thing, but I can’t just leave this new information hanging out there awkwardly. “I’m sorry.”
“Yeah, me too.” He gives himself a shake and looks down at Isabelle. “She’s not safe here.”
“Safer here than in her sister’s house, at le
ast until we figure our shit out.”
Beast shakes his head. “It’s our fault she’s sniffing around. And pulling the stunt we did in the Underworld won’t have helped. Hades’s people might not gossip, but everyone else does. If they think we’re using Orsino’s death and the resulting imbalance of power to punish Isabelle—”
“Fuck.” I close my eyes. I hadn’t been thinking about any of that when she showed up. I’m an exposed nerve for this woman. The highest pleasure for the last twenty-four hours still comes with a slice of pain because this entire situation is temporary. It’s always been temporary, even if I was too shortsighted to see it before. Isabelle won’t marry me. She was never going to. Even if she somehow chooses me and we end up exclusive, she loves her freedom too much to put my ring on her finger. Not when she sees marriage as a trap ready to close around her leg and keep her in place.
I don’t know if I have the control necessary to hold her with a loose grip. The control required to keep her happy. No matter how many different scenarios I play out, they all end in heartbreak. Maybe in twelve days. Maybe in a few months or even years.
Why the hell did I agree to this?
“Gaeton.”
I open my eyes to find Beast watching me, a strange expression on his face. He doesn’t exactly shut it down when I look at him, but I can’t divine out what the fuck it means. He gives a small smile. “We can buy ourselves some time with a little show.”
No need for him to spell it out. When people in Carver City want to make a statement to the other territories in a way that won’t start a war, they do it at the Underworld. Relationships announced. Peace pacts made. Even the occasional spat. All of it happens under the protection of Hades’s neutral territory.
“If we go in there and tell everyone that we’re hers, there’s no taking it back. We can’t change our minds later.” Not if we want to stay in the city. It doesn’t matter how much power we have individually, or how great out reputations; if we cross someone we promised allegiance to, no territory leader in Carver City will touch us.
