Chapter Fourteen
Juliette
The abuse was occurring on a regular basis. The bruises were never visible to others, but the pain left behind was becoming harder to hide.
Quietly, I pushed the window up and slipped into my bedroom. The moment my feet hit the floor, I’m stopped in my tracks by a sharp pain against my ear. The force of the punch knocked me into the wall, and my head struck it.
My ear throbbed, the pain intense. I’d never felt pain like this before. The light on the ceiling blinded me with its brightness. Ms. Peg grabbed a fistful of my hair and hoisted me to an upright position. She stood before me with a black leather belt in her hand.
“Where have you been?” she screamed.
Her closed fist struck me on the side of my head again, which knocked me off balance, and I fell to the floor.
“Sneaking out of the house! Are you a whore, Juliette?” she yelled.
“I’m sorry, Ms. Peg. It won’t happen again.” I gulped, tears streaming down my cheeks.
She grabbed my wrist hard and yanked me forcefully from the floor. With the leather belt in her left hand, she raised her arm high then delivered the first blow across my butt. She didn’t stop there, as several more strikes landed across my back and thighs.
“You will learn to be obedient. You will be trained. I will break you, Juliette,” she snarled, her eyes raging with anger.
She dragged me over to a dog kennel in the corner of my bedroom. I didn’t see it when I got into my room. Ms. Peg pulled the door open, pushed me down, and shoved me inside, then placed a lock on it.
“You will stay here until you know how to behave. You will not get out. If you do, the next beating will be worse than this one. Do you understand?” she hollered, her finger pointed in my face.
I scurried into the back corner of the cage and laid on my side. The pain in my butt hurt so bad, I couldn’t sit on it. Hot tears rolled down my cheeks.
Ms. Peg left my room, slamming the door behind her.
Days passed. I knew that much because I counted how many times it was dark out. School days passed by, and I didn’t attend.
It was nighttime again, and a noise woke me up. My window was being pushed up. I was too weak to lift my head, but I knew who it was.
“Jules, oh my God, what have they done to you?” He knelt down near the front of the cage, his fingers fumbling with the lock. He tugged on it several times until he broke the clasp. Once the door was opened, he leaned in and gathered me in his arms.
“Come on, I have to get you out of here,” he whispered.
“Shh, they’ll hear you.” My voice cracked as dryness burned my throat.
“No, they won’t. I saw them leave for work a few minutes ago. I told my mom I wasn’t feeling good, so she let me stay home. You’ve missed school, and I haven’t seen you in three days. I was worried. I knew in my heart something was wrong.”
Brennan scooted in and lifted me into his arms, carrying me to the adjoining bathroom. He sat me down on the toilet, turned on the faucets, and the tub filled with warm water.
“Get undressed, you need to get a bath.”
Hesitantly, I stood and caught my reflection in the mirror. My body froze as I stared at my unrecognizable face.
“Lift your arms. I’ll help you get changed.”
This can’t be happening. Brennan is going to see me naked. No boy has ever seen me naked before. Not knowing what to do, I disconnected from my inner thoughts and did as Brennan asked.
My arms lifted robotically, and he gently removed my shirt, then I stepped out of my soiled shorts.
Embarrassed by my condition, my arms covered my bare chest. Not that I had anything, but I don’t want Brennan to see me this broken.
His face paled. His skin bunched around his eyes with a pained stare.
“You have welts on your back, and you’re covered in bruises. What did they do to you?”
My eyes lifted to the mirror, and Brennan’s eyes met mine. “Jules, what happened?”
I forced myself to swallow the knot that formed in my throat. Tears blinded my eyes and choked my voice. “She caught me sneaking into my room the other night.”
I turned away, my hands clenched stiffly at my sides. Embarrassment raced through my veins.
He touched my elbow lightly and urged me toward the tub. “Here, I’ll help you. Lean on me and lift your leg over the side. Let’s get you in the bath.”
Slowly I lifted one leg up, then the other. I dropped down into the warm water, pulled my knees up, and wrapped my arms around them.
Brennan grabbed a rag and rubbed the bar of soap over it. His hand brushed the hair from my neck, then he rubbed the rag gently across my broken skin. I flinched from the stinging burn each time he dusted the rag across them.
“Close your eyes, Jules.” He took a cup, pouring water over my hair.
“Can I ask you something?” My voice broke.
“Of course.” His fingers massaged the shampoo into my scalp.
“What’s a whore?”
His hands froze. “Why are you asking?”
“Is it a bad word? Ms. Peg called me it, and I don’t know what the word means.”
His fingers moved again. “You’re not a whore. That’s all you need to know, Jules. She’s a mean bitch. Don’t you believe anything that woman says to you. It’s a lie.” His voice sounded angry.
Brennan never said bad words. He must be mad.
Once I was clean, Brennan helped get me dressed. With each lift of my limbs, my body screamed with pain.
“Please stay with me. Please don’t leave me,” I pleaded, and wept aloud, rocking back and forth.
Brennan sat on the edge of my bed and pulled me into his lap. “I won’t. I’m taking you to my house. You’ll be safe there. They’re never going to hurt you again. I swear my life on it.”
The next day my life was turned upside down.
At ten years old, I lost my best friend.
I would have taken a beating every day to keep Brennan in my life.
He was mine.
He was my life.
I can’t breathe. My lungs squeeze tightly, and my chest burns. Gentle hands lightly shake my body side to side. “Mills, wake up.”
Hands grip my shoulder, and I’m being shaken again. “Wake up!”
My eyes snap open and I try to focus. I heave myself away from the hands holding me. Gripping the damp sheets wrapped around my body, I tremble violently.
I inhale deep breaths as my stomach turns. Lee pulls me into his lap, wrapping his arms around my body. “You were having a nightmare. I’ve got you, you’re safe,” he murmurs softly against my ear.
I close my eyes, forcing the tears from them. I dry my face with the back of my hand, swallowing past the memories as they knot in my throat.
Lee continues to repeat “You’re safe, nobody’s going to hurt you,” in my ear, as his hand rubs up and down my back. Being wrapped in the comfort of his arms helps slow my rapid breathing and pounding heartbeat.
The memories of my past are coming more frequently, including nightmares of the night I found my biological father. Funny how he’s become known as that. Pops is who comes to mind immediately when I think of a dad.
Pulling myself off Lee’s lap, I wrap the sheet around me and walk into my bathroom. My hands still tremble as I turn the cold water faucet on. Leaning over the sink, I cup handfuls of cold water, splashing my face with it. My heart rate steadies as I inhale several deep breaths, yet my hands still shake.
I take in my reflection in the mirror. My face is flushed, and my gray eyes are overly dull. I can still see Brennan’s face as he stared back at me in the mirror, taking in my battered body. It’s as if he’s standing behind me, still protecting me.
A knock on the door frame pulls my attention from the past and back into the present. Implicit pain is alive and glowing in my eyes. Not wanting Lee to see it, I avoid his eyes and stare at my polished toenails. My hands unconsciously
twist together in front of me.
Lee walks into the bathroom. He reaches out, wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling my back against his chest. His relaxed hands intertwine with mine, resting against my stomach.
“Sweetheart,” he says, drawing my attention to meet his eyes in the mirror. The term of endearment catches me off guard. It’s the first time he’s called me anything other than Mills.
His face clouds with uneasiness. “You want to talk about it?” His voice is gentle, laced with concern.
Those blue eyes of his impale me and a flash of familiarity courses through my body. Tormented by my confusing emotions, I watch him with a critical squint.
Humiliation and shame cause an unwelcome blush to creep onto my cheeks, turning them a shade of scarlet. I hesitate and shake my head. “No, I just want to go back to bed.”
His shoulders are hunched, his eyes are filled with sadness. Lee takes a deep breath and leads us back to my bed. He lays down, lifting the blankets for me to crawl under. When I’m nestled under the comfy blanket, he pulls my back against his chest, placing a kiss on my head. A sense of security and safety envelops me.
“If you ever need to talk, I’m here for you,” his voice is just above a whisper.
Hot tears slip down my cheeks. “I know,” I sigh, attempting to hide my tears. I’ve only cried in front of four people in my entire life. Pops, Ma, Quinn, and Brennan.
Now, Lee is added to the very short list.
My feelings are permanently kept under lock and key. They’re pushed so deep, I refuse to feel them when they’re stronger than me. At this moment, I would welcome numbness rather than feeling this sense of exposure. However, the panic that usually follows a nightmare is somehow kept at bay. Being in Lee’s arms seems to be a safe haven.
I haven’t felt this way in over seventeen years.
It’s a feeling I’ve missed.
Chapter Fifteen
Lee
Extricating myself from her arms, legs, and the sheets as carefully as possible, I stand beside the bed and watch her. Her hair sticks up wildly from my hands running through it.
I rub my chest where my heart is, pained by how tight it has become. I could get used to this, waking up with my girl in my arms every morning. My heart thumps in my chest with the thought. Wow, my girl.
My eyes bounce around in search of the boxers I kicked off last night before spending the night with my girl. Slipping one leg in at a time, I pull them on and tread quietly out her room, closing the door softly behind me.
Coffee, please tell me there is coffee in this place. After Mills fell back to sleep, I couldn’t, her nightmare plagued me. My mind wandered restlessly, leaving me more confused than ever. Something keeps Mills up at night. She seemed embarrassed when I followed her into the bathroom. Her cheeks were flushed.
Mills has a one-cup coffee maker on the counter, so I search the cabinets for the single-serving pods and a mug. When I find them, I pop one in the machine then grab the creamer out of the refrigerator. While the machine is brewing, I take in the city view. Funny how we don’t live close, yet we can see the same city skyline from each of our apartments. I study my surroundings, taking in her space. It’s the first time I’ve been here. It’s nicely decorated with abstract framed art pieces on the walls. The exposed brick wall is the focal point in the room.
The gurgling sound alerts me it’s finished. I grab the mug and add creamer and some sugar. My mouth waters at the aroma of the freshly brewed coffee. Lifting the mug to my lips, I blow over the rim of the cup before taking a soothing sip.
“Good morning.”
What the hell? That cheerful voice does not belong to Mills. Looking down, I realize I’m only wearing boxer shorts. Fuck. This cannot be happening. Peering over my shoulder, I see her friend Quinn walk into the kitchen, rubbing her eyes. Her hair is tossed into some sort of messy bun on top of her head. She reaches past me, grabbing a cup and coffee pod. She sets the machine up, then stands, watching her coffee brew.
She stands before me in only an oversized shirt, which seems to barely cover her ass. I want to kick myself in the ass for not asking if Quinn was home last night.
Not knowing what to say in this very awkward situation, I lift my mug to my mouth and take another sip. Quinn turns to face me, eyeing me up and down, making me a little uncomfortable under her stare.
“Mr. Big Dick. My nickname sure is fitting,” she says while staring over the rim of her coffee mug, lifting her finger to point at my dick.
I choke on my coffee, causing me to cough a few times, and attempt to clear my throat. “Excuse me?” I reply.
“I figured you were hung. I refer to you as Mr. Big Dick. It’s sort of a joke between us.”
I swallow back a smile and shake my head. “Really? I wasn’t aware my dick was a topic of discussion among you ladies.”
“Am I interrupting something?” Mills walks into the kitchen. She sets into motion, making herself a cup of coffee. Her little boy shorts hug her firm ass nicely, and the sleep tank she has on rises slightly above her stomach, revealing one of her piercings.
Once her coffee has brewed, she turns toward both Quinn and me.
Taking another sip from my steaming mug of coffee, I place it down on the granite island. “Mr. Big Dick?”
Mills stares at Quinn for a long moment. “You told him?”
She shrugs nonchalantly. “It sort of slipped.”
“The topic of his dick just sort of slipped?” Mills raises her brow at her best friend.
I push off the bar, reaching for Mills’ hand, entwining our fingers. “I didn’t realize Quinn was home last night, or I would have dressed accordingly this morning.”
“It’s okay, I don’t mind,” Quinn quickly interjects, earning a hard glare from Mills.
Mills lifts her finger, pointing to the hallway. “Can you go put a pair of shorts on? Your ass is hanging out.”
“Oh, stop.” Quinn lifts her mug to her lips, taking a sip. “If you plan on keeping him around, which I suggest you do, we’re going to be seeing a lot of each other. He’s only got eyes for you. He isn’t concerned with what I’m packing.” She laughs.
Mills shakes her head. “Please excuse her. There’s something seriously wrong with her.”
I lean down, placing a kiss on Mill’s cheek. “I’ll be right back. Let me throw on my jeans.”
With that, I turn and head down the hall to Mills’ bedroom. I’m slipping my legs into my pants when I hear Mills raised voice.
“Are you kidding me? You told him you call him Mr. Big Dick?”
A rumble of laughter escapes me. I didn’t realize my dick would receive a name with these two. Not that I’m complaining. It proves my dick was discussed. It means my girl is pleased with my performance. Not that I doubted it.
I do feel a sense of possession over her. After hearing her cry out, “I’m sorry. It won’t happen again,” in her sleep, I want to know even more about her. What was she sorry for? What did she do?
I want to know what makes her smile, what makes her happy, even what troubles her.
Wanting to spend the day with Mills was never a question, it was what we should do to take her mind off her nightmare. I could sense she was avoiding a conversation about it, and I didn’t want to make her feel uncomfortable. When I told her last night I was here for her if she wanted to talk, I meant it. If she chooses to talk to me, it has to be on her terms. That much I know about her.
“Here ya go.” The woman working the ticket counter at the Philadelphia Zoo hands us a map of the zoo. “Enjoy your day.”
“Thank you,” I reply, taking the maps from her, handing Mills one. “So, what do you want to see first?”
Her hands move quickly as she unfolds the map, seeing the layout of the place. “Let’s head this way.” She lifts her hand, pointing her finger ahead of us.
“Looks like the big cat exhibit is up on the right. The tigers and lions are some of my favorites, besides the primates.”
My hand comes down over hers possessively, clutching it in mine. Mills arches a brow and inhales sharply. “What are you doing?” Her eyes dart toward our joined hands.
The corners of my mouth rise. Lifting our joined hands, I place a soft kiss against her knuckles. “What’s it look like I’m doing?” I drop our hands to our sides. “Lead the way, my dear. Today is all about you.”
She merely stares, tongue-tied. Trying to hide her smile, she nods.
A few strollers line the outside of the big cat exhibit. We make our way inside and are fortunate to see two large lions sleeping at the front of the enclosure.
“Look how relaxed they are.” Mills points. “Their paws are huge,” she speaks excitedly.
I spin her around and back her against the railing. Pressing my body to hers, we fit perfectly together. Leaning down, I suck on her bottom lip, tugging her ring in between my teeth, causing her to make a throaty moan.
“What are you doing? People are all around us.”
Looking around, I notice we’re completely alone in this section of the lion exhibit. “Relax. The zoo opened ten minutes ago, nobody else rushed to see the lions.”
“There were strollers when we came in.”
“And those people aren’t here. They must be exploring the other cats in the exhibit.”
Her breasts are against my chest, my hardened cock is wedged against her belly. Her gray eyes search mine, and I don’t want to hide what I’m feeling.
“I’d like to see where this goes between us.”
Her eyes widen.
“We don’t have to put a label on us, but I need to know you’re mine. I’m a man who doesn’t like to share.”
“Lee…” Her chest heaves while her eyes grow large and liquid. She draws a deep breath, and I can tell she’s fighting a tremble.
Mills and her fucking rules. She ‘doesn’t do relationships.’ I’m letting her know we don’t need to put ourselves in a box with a label. But I vowed to break her rules one at a time. A little progress each day will go a long way, and if I have my way, the results will be big.
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