by Mandi Lynn
On top of the cave in Phantom Lagoon stands Luna. She waves up to me with the biggest smile on her face—she must have known. We don’t disappear; we pass on with our family. I try to imagine why she hasn’t left herself. I realize, even though she doesn’t have any family, that’s not why she has chosen to stay. She stays because she wants to. As much as she’s lived through, she knows her place. Luna is there to protect others from Phantom Lagoon and watch those who live there now.
I will miss Eliza and Kenzie. They are like family, but I guess there’s an end to everything. They are a different type of family that will never die or fade away. Even when there is a barrier between us, I know they will remember me. I will be remembered as another soul that disappeared. There will be tearless sobs today. Eliza and Kenzie will both lose a sister.
A bright light illuminates the sky. It should’ve been blinding, but it is beautiful and impossible to look away from. It holds me like a trance, and I welcome the glow as it comes closer—or maybe I’m the one moving.
Soon shapes come into view. It’s hazy and hard to make out, but then the clouds clear, and all that’s left is a fine pink mist.
My dad is the first one I see, and he no longer looks old or beaten down by chemotherapy. Beside me I can feel my mom’s radiant glow as she sets eyes on her husband, happy and healthy. Her face glimmers with happiness, already in her own personal Heaven.
Other shapes come; a face I don’t know but looks so familiar. As it comes into focus, I know it must be Eliza’s dad, and next to him is Eliza’s mom, both holding hands—he died with his wife after her car accident, just like I died with my mom. I know Eliza misses them, and I’m going to make sure I tell them of their daughter.
Then comes other family members like my grandma and grandpa. They are standing next to my dad, eagerly waiting for us. Everyone is here.
When I least expect it, a bright flash of color comes in front of me. It appears as a movie, answering all the questions I have ever had. Some things I had only been mildly curious about, while others are things I struggled with my entire life. With those answers come a peace of mind so blissful and complete, it almost feels as if it isn’t true. The feeling of fear, pain, and loss is finally gone.
Suddenly everything I have gone through doesn’t matter. I don’t care that I’ve missed most of my life. It doesn’t matter that my dad has been forced to die at a young age. Suddenly everything from the excruciating to the numbing doesn’t compare. For this, it is worth it. The only thing that matters is that I’m here with my family, and it’s over.
Then, when I thought it couldn’t get any better, I see it. And I knew, only then, that I’m truly in Heaven.
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About the Author
Mandi Lynn published her first novel when she was seventeen. The author of Essence, I am Mercy and She’s Not Here, Mandi spends her days continuing to write and creating YouTube videos to help other writers achieve their dreams of seeing their books published. Mandi is the creator of AuthorTube Academy, a course that teaches authors how to grow their presence on YouTube and find loyal readers. When she’s not creating, you can find Mandi exploring her backyard or getting lost in the woods.
Newsletter: http://bit.ly/MandisNews
www.mandilynn.com
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Acknowledgments
Essence has been a novel that’s been in the works since the beginning of 2010. The year 2011 greeted me with the first of many rejections when I entered Essence in a publishing contest, and since then it has been through ten drafts. I still can’t believe I can finally say I’m a published author, but of course, there are so many people I have to thank!
Among those are the only people who read the first draft of Chapter 6: my best friends Carolyn Trottier and Kaitlyn Panagiotou, and Mrs. Cavanagh (my junior high English teacher). Kaitlyn, or KT, especially, who read the entire first draft and somehow liked it.
My parents, to whom this book is dedicated. Thank you for putting up with my tears and erratic behavior whenever I came across a problem while trying to publish this novel. Most of all, thank you for not allowing me to go to the New York City Pitch Conference. If I had gone, this book wouldn’t be in print right now. Thank you for taking me to Sabbaday Falls so I could stand in a dress in freezing weather, just a few feet from snow, to get a breathtaking photo for the book cover. And of course, thank you for allowing me to spend the money I saved to buy a car on publishing instead. I promise you won’t regret it.
To all my friends at school who unknowingly read the first chapter of my book for my science project to see if people could tell the difference between an adult’s writing and a teenager’s writing
(P.S. People couldn’t tell a difference). Though I can’t name everyone who gave me my first five-star ratings, it meant a lot to know I could actually write something people enjoyed.
All my teachers, from middle school to high school, who have helped me form the high standards in everything I do. It doesn’t matter if you taught me history, pre-calculus, English, chemistry, or cosmetology, you have all shaped me to be the person I am today.
My editors at BubbleCow. Gary Smailes, for helping me direct my inner monologue. And Denise Barker, you’re the best copy editor I could ever ask for. You both gave me hope I never had before.
Wendy Burt-Thomas, for replying to every e-mail and always believing in me when I didn’t believe in myself.
Auntie Donna, my unofficial editor, who made me think about my book in the most incredible ways and allowing new chapters to form.
Huge thanks to anyone on YouTube, Facebook, or Twitter who have followed me on my publication journey. You guys believed in me, even before I had a book to hand you. Words cannot describe how happy I am every time I see a new comment on one of my videos.
Most of all I have to thank all thirty-nine literary agents who have rejected me. You’ve forced me to rewrite my novel and make it better. Without all of you, my book would never be what it is today. Maybe you’ll hear from me again someday.
Table of Contents
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Prologue
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Chapter 1
The Forest
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Chapter 2
Unreal
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Chapter 3
First Day
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Chapter 4
Papers
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Chapter 5
Camping
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Chapter 6
The Mist
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Chapter 7
Explaining
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Chapter 8
Missing
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Chapter 9
Lost Soul
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Chapter 10
Training
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Chapter 11
The News
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Chapter 12
Powers & Secrets
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Chapter 13
A Lost Father
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Chapter 14
Testing Limits
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Chapter 15
The Truth
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Chapter 16
Pink
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Chapter 17
Angels
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Chapter 18
Reality
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Chapter 19
Mackenzie
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Chapter 20
Sunday
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Chapter 21
ER
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Chapter 22
The Promise
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Chapter 23
Fear & Loss
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Chapter 24
Senility
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Chapter 25
North Conway
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Chapter 26
Runaway
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Chapter 27
Healing
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Chapter 28
Void
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Chapter 29
The Return
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Chapter 30
Homecoming
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Chapter 31
Dwelling
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Chapter 32
Enshrine
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Chapter 33
Savior
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Chapter 34
False Security
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Chapter 35
Death
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Support the Author
About the Author
Acknowledgments
