When she heard his footsteps approach, the sound muffled by the soft carpet, Juliet had no choice but to straighten up and, once again, gather the remainder of her now thoroughly tattered dignity. She could not think of a convincing excuse quickly enough so she settled for another half-truth. “I am only experiencing a temporary weakness.” She turned herself around again so she could face Lord Overton. “I assure you it will pass momentarily.”
The earl came nearer, stopping just a few feet away from Juliet’s chair. She hoped he would not sit next to her. He already felt too close. Yet she also hoped that he would, just like the old days when they’d sat side by side in drawing rooms and ballrooms and parks and carriages for hours on end, absorbing everything about each other. Well, perhaps not everything. Juliet had kept hidden the deepest part of her until the very end, until it had driven her from him.
He did not speak, so Juliet took it upon herself to try to turn this strange meeting around. “How did you know where to find me?” That was not the question she should have asked, but it had slipped from her lips anyway. She should have asked about something mundane like the weather or how his lunch had been.
“I didn’t,” Lord Overton responded briefly. The usual sharp edge in his voice that Juliet had come to know as normal for him had softened ever so slightly. “I was coming this way when I saw Felix leaving the room. He looked concerned about something and when I asked if all was well, he assured me that it was. I thought I’d glance into the room as I went by to see if anything looked amiss. That’s when I saw you.”
Lord Overton’s eyebrow arched up in a signal that Juliet recognized as impending mischief. But his gaze did not contain any mischief, only curiosity. She supposed he hadn’t expected to find her here looking quite amiss.
“Felix just delivered some tea for me.” She picked up her cup and took a sip from it, tilting the cup up high enough to block her view of the earl.
Her eyes needed a reprieve from that stunningly handsome face—oval with pronounced cheekbones, a gently squared chin that gave way to a firm jawline, lips that had once been perpetually curved upward at the corners, ready to smile at a moment’s notice. And, of course, the thick, flaming auburn hair contrasted by bright green eyes. He looked exactly the same as he always had, yet so very different. He was older, changed. His eyes no longer shimmered with his love of life and entertainment and activity...or his love for her.
The man took another cautious step closer. “Was Felix rude to you?”
“Goodness gracious, no! He was perfectly pleasant,” she insisted, immediately wondering if her overly enthusiastic response had been a mistake.
“Please tell me the truth, Miss Richards,” Lord Overton urged. “I will not tolerate any unkindness in my staff, to you or anyone else.” His voice carried all the authority befitting an earl, but there was more than that. It also carried determination, a desire for justice. Juliet had heard it before, just once, on the day she had told Solomon she must end their courtship. He had not wanted to give up. He had tried to convince her that they could find a way to overcome any obstacles, whatever they may be. He had been so confident in himself, in their love, right up until Juliet had turned her back and walked away.
“I promise, Lord Overton, there is nothing wrong,” Juliet insisted once more. She set her teacup down and folded her hands in her lap, her eyes falling away from the man before her. “Please do not press the matter with Felix. Making a fuss over nothing will not endear me to the staff.” She smiled ruefully, twisting her fingers together in a multitude of surprising shapes. She was not usually one to fidget.
Lord Overton stepped closer again, so quietly that Juliet would not have known it had she not seen his boots move forward. She looked back up and tried to give a more convincing smile this time. The earl regarded her thoughtfully. He had been very thoughtful these days, much more so than when she’d known him in London. Of course, that did not mean he lacked intelligence. He’d simply been a man who lived for the moment, following his whims wherever they led him—even if they occasionally got him into some minor trouble. He’d never cared much about getting into trouble, seeing everything that happened as an amusing experience to be appreciated for the excitement and laughter it caused.
He had certainly changed, she reminded herself, shaped by his circumstances.
Even knowing that the man still grieved, Juliet found herself selfishly missing his bright expressions, his silly teasing, the ease and charm with which he moved through the world. That man had been Solomon; the man before her now was Lord Overton. Her past self, Juliet, was also gone. Now she would forever be Miss Richards.
“Is there anything else that troubles you?” he asked quietly, his lips pursed together. He looked at her with genuine concern, as if he truly wanted to hear her, wanted to see her.
Juliet’s breath caught in her throat but she forced it out in a short sigh. “My lord, I have no right to burden you with my—”
“Please, Miss Richards. I am quite insistent. I must know what troubles you.” His words sounded like a strange marriage of a command and a plea. When he saw how wide Juliet’s eyes had become at his sudden interest, he cleared his throat and swallowed. “It is my duty, after all, to ensure that my staff is satisfied and well looked after.”
Try as she might, Juliet could not stop her heart from aching as his words washed over her. Perhaps he did still care for her, even if only for the role she played in his household. It was better than nothing, but, even still, they could no longer share their worries and fears and dreams with each other as they’d once done.
Lord Overton took yet another step closer. “Be honest with me.”
There it was, something Juliet could grasp onto as truly familiar. That warm, genuine caring he’d always had at his core had broken through. She remembered his reputation in London well enough—a fun-loving earl who attended every event and humored every lady for at least one or two carriage rides in Hyde Park, a great friend of many great men throughout the country.
Beneath all that lay his heart of gold. She knew why he kept it hidden. She’d heard all about his first love, the enigmatic Miss Woolmer who had gone on to marry some duke or other, and how badly that had hurt him. It had taken him much time and effort to reveal that pain though it had happened years before they’d met. Juliet had felt so honored that such a confident, cheerful man would open up to her about such a delicate topic. On that day that he’d revealed his former love, Juliet had been so sure that she would do absolutely everything in her power to prevent him from ever feeling that pain again.
If only she could go back to those carefree, romantic days and bear constant witness to that amazing quality that so few had a chance to see. If only she could go back to those days before she’d become another heartbreak.
Juliet sighed again, allowing her reservations to dissipate enough for her to tell the truth. “I have been a bit lonely. I am still adjusting to this new life and I miss my family and friends.”
“Do you not write to them?” he asked gently, still with that same sincere worry.
“I do, as often as I can, but thinking about and writing to someone you cherish is not the same as being by their side,” Juliet confessed, looking down at her hands in her lap, her fingers anxiously twisting the gray fabric around themselves.
Lord Overton remained silent for a long moment and Juliet’s head shot up. Had she said something out of line? It was not uncommon for people of the ton to ask a question without expecting a genuine answer.
And besides, Juliet was not one for being terribly open about her struggles in the first place. She’d found herself able to share more than she’d thought possible with Solomon. In the end, she had not been able to share all of the truth, the truth of her desires for a meaningful life. Though he had been nothing but understanding, Juliet had been unable to dispel the fear that he would not accept her if he knew what was truly in her heart.
He stared at Juliet intently. “I know.”
> For a breathtaking moment, Juliet wondered if perhaps he'd been thinking about her when he’d said that. She quickly pushed the thought away, burying it in that dark corner of her heart where she had banished all her memories and feelings of Lord Overton. Unfortunately for Juliet, the security in that corner left much to be desired. Those memories and feelings escaped far too often, even after all this time had passed.
Besides, even if by some impossible chance she had been right, the earl still wore full mourning. Nothing mattered more right now than his grief and healing.
Lord Overton seemed to realize that he stared, for he quickly turned his head to the side, allowing Juliet a generous view of his perfect side profile. “I am glad you are here, truly. Pearl loves you and she’s been growing and learning so much—and healing, which is the most important of all. You know, she told us at lunch that her papa loved ham and she loves ham, which means that he still lives on inside her, just as you had told her.”
The words rushed out, clipped and awkward. As soon as they left his lips, Lord Overton turned on his heel and hastily quit the morning room. Juliet had been left alone once more to her quiet contemplation by the window.
This time, instead of contemplating her loneliness, Juliet contemplated Lord Overton. She glanced out the window. The snow had stopped falling.
“Goodness!” Juliet cried, a hearty laugh escaping her as she watched Pearl’s antics. The pale late November sunlight filtered in through several windows in the nursery, illuminating Pearl’s curtsey practice to a joyful degree.
Juliet had been working on curtsies with Pearl nearly since the beginning. The young girl had certainly made progress, but she did not always remember the proper steps, thanks to her excitement or shyness. To help Pearl understand the varying degrees of curtsies for different people, Juliet would assume a persona and announce herself to the girl, allowing her to practice for all types of scenarios.
This last time, Juliet had pretended to be a very regal duchess, holding her head high and gazing down at Pearl with graceful acknowledgement. Pearl had been nervous about meeting a duchess, even one that looked exactly like her trusted governess. In her haste to make an appropriate first impression, Pearl had dropped her foot back too far and had stumbled backwards onto her rear. There she remained, performing her curtsey from a cross-legged position.
Juliet regained her composure and resumed her act as duchess. “Whatever in the world are you doing down there? This is quite unsavory,” she scolded lightly, trying her best to keep her giggles muffled beneath her presumably austere voice.
“Don’t you know, my lady—I mean, your grace? This is the fashion now.” Pearl gently shook her head as if shocked that such an esteemed woman would not know which behaviors had fallen out of favor and which had become popular.
She could contain herself no longer. Juliet’s laughter rang through the room once more. Pearl soon joined in, her high-pitched squeals of delight nearly drowning out Juliet. The girl never ceased to amaze her with her surprisingly astute observations and humor. Juliet had no doubt that Pearl’s wit and ease of conversation, already evident at this young age, would make her a favorite among anyone she wished to befriend.
“That was very nice, Pearl,” Juliet stuttered through her laughter, “but we must get back to work. Now who shall your next visitor be?”
Pearl pushed herself to her feet and ran to Juliet, her honey brown curls flying behind her. She threw herself into Juliet’s arms with such force that Juliet took a few stumbling steps backward as she caught her charge. Pearl wrapped her arms around Juliet’s neck and gazed at her with large, round eyes, her bottom lip pushed out in a slight pout. Juliet knew this look well.
“Please, Miss Richards, may we go outside now?” she whined. Juliet chuckled and shook her head, walking them both over to the window.
She peered out, surprised to see a wonderfully blue sky above. The morning sun had already melted the light snowfall from the previous day. She sent a silent prayer of thanks that it had not started snowing too heavily yet.
“One more proper curtsey and then we can play outside for twenty minutes,” Juliet promised.
“Yay!” Pearl shouted with glee as she wiggled her way out of Juliet’s arms, already taking up her curtseying position.
“Just a moment now. What do we say when someone does something kind for us?” Juliet asked with a raised eyebrow.
“Thank you, Miss Richards!” Pearl beamed up at her governess, eagerly clutching her dark gray skirts in her hands.
Before Juliet could present herself as a new acquaintance, a soft knock at the nursery door surprised them both.
“Come in,” Juliet called and a footman, a young man named Alexander, entered without removing his hand from the doorknob.
“Miss Richards, you have been summoned to the drawing room,” he announced.
Juliet’s brows furrowed. “Thank you, Alexander. Do you know why?”
“I do not,” he answered coldly, wrinkling his nose at her. Juliet pretended not to notice, looking at Pearl instead. They exchanged curious glances.
Nerves fluttered about Juliet’s stomach during the long journey to the drawing room, her hand clutching Pearl’s. She had no idea what to expect. No one ever summered her during the day as everyone knew she would be busy teaching. And if anyone did come looking for them, it was usually the countess wanting to spend time with Pearl. This time, the summons had come for Juliet.
Juliet paused outside the dark oak door of the drawing room, muffled voices barely audible through the thick wood. She could not make any words out nor tell who any of the voices belonged to, but, if she had to guess, she would say the room contained more than just the earl and the dowager countess. A light squeeze of her hand pulled Juliet back to the present moment. She glanced at Pearl, who smiled up at her encouragingly, her youthful face full of unexpectant hope. Juliet returned the smile, squeezing Pearl’s hand back.
She clutched the doorknob and took a deep breath. When she pushed the door open, everything in Juliet’s mind went blank.
“Jules! Oh how lovely to see you!” her sister cried, tears already springing into her deep blue eyes, elegant musician fingers covering her mouth.
At the sound of her old nickname floating out to her on Cecilia’s voice, Juliet hurried forward in stunned silence.
“Come here, my dear!” Cecilia spread her arms open. Juliet suppressed a wild urge to jump into her sister’s arms just as Pearl had done earlier.
She refrained, remembering her manners, but, more importantly, remembering Pearl’s. She shook the girl’s hand. With that reminder, Pearl quickly stepped forward and gave her best curtsey yet, then immediately turned back around to face Juliet.
“May we go outside now, pretty please? You promised after one more curtsey!” She clasped her hands before her chest, staring up at Juliet imploringly.
Everyone in the room burst into laughter. That was another thing Juliet could be certain of. Pearl would bring laughter and smiles with her wherever she went.
“Soon, I promise. I must say hello to some very dear people I have not seen in a long time,” Juliet chuckled, gently tucking a strand of hair behind Pearl’s ear.
Without further ado, she rushed to her sister and they threw their arms around each other. Juliet buried her face in Cecilia’s neck, Cecilia resting her cheek against Juliet’s hair. Juliet had once been jealous of her sister’s taller frame but for now she could think of nothing better than being smothered in Cecilia’s presence just as she was right now.
“Sissy! I’m so glad you’re here,” Juliet whispered as her own tears trickled out.
She pulled back, still holding her sister’s arms, and examined the older woman’s face. Cecilia looked just as well as she had when Juliet had last seen her in the summer at Gatherford Park, the lovely estate she shared with her husband. Juliet allowed herself to stare, taking in Cecilia’s features, always so sweet and soft, a few tendrils of golden hair perfectly framing her roun
d face. She hadn’t been expecting to see her so soon. In fact, she’d had no idea when she might be able to get away for a visit or how to even ask such a thing of her employers. Cecilia stared back, just as unabashed, and Juliet could see how deeply her sister had missed her and worried for her. Juliet hoped to put Cecilia at ease soon—even if she had to tell more half-truths.
“Now, now, please do not tell me you’ve forgotten your dear brother,” a deep voice called out from over Cecilia’s shoulder. Henry stepped forward with a small smile, gently placing his hands on his wife’s shoulders.
“I could never,” Juliet giggled as she untangled herself from Cecilia and hugged her brother-in-law for a contented moment.
She and Henry had become good friends since his marriage to her sister. At first, both Juliet and Cecilia had been put off by his aloof personality and seeming disinterest in making polite conversation. Soon, they both came to learn that the man was simply plagued by a heavy dose of shyness.
As Cecilia and Henry had become closer, growing serious in their courtship, Juliet had wondered if she could ever truly get along with such a reserved, bookish man as the Baron of Neil. After all, Juliet herself was far more lively and chatty, and she had never cared much for reading when she had any other activity to occupy her time. But now Juliet truly did consider him to be her brother. She was immensely glad to see him.
“And Violet and Owen are here!” Juliet cried as two more guests stepped forward. The Davies had become her very good friends as well in recent years. Violet had been a maid in the Richards house since her childhood, eventually becoming Cecilia’s personal maid and now companion. Owen, a former army captain, shared Juliet’s interest in adventure and activity, though even Juliet found him difficult to keep up with even on her best days.
The handsome couple stepped forward and took turns greeting Juliet, Owen’s firm hug nearly squeezing the breath out of Juliet’s lungs while Violet’s was so sweet and comforting. They were opposites in many ways, yet Juliet had seen for herself just how well they balanced each other out.
Embracing The Earl's Dream: A Clean Regency Romance (Resolved In Love Book 4) Page 6
