Gavin shook his head. “Don’t thank me, yet.”
He felt the limo turn, and knew they couldn’t be far. He’d fix this.
He’d do whatever it took to fix it.
✽ ✽ ✽
Vanessa was embarrassed. So embarrassed.
She pulled a tee-shirt over her head, pulling her wet hair through the collar and wrapping it up into a tight bun. She walked out of the bedroom and into her main room. The television was on, more for background noise than anything else.
She didn’t want to think.
It had been nearly a year since the last time she’d lost control like that. Hyperventilating, shrinking rooms, chest pain… she thought she’d moved past that. Apparently not. The thoughts of things going wrong with Jared made it all rush back to her like it had never left, like the therapy had never even existed.
Her hand started to shake again at her side.
She cursed under her breath.
Vanessa needed to call Jared. She needed to apologize for what she’d said. She was so stressed, she hadn’t meant any of it. Ever since her high school sweetheart decided she was too boring for him, she’d pushed people away. That was exactly what she was doing now.
She would call Jared, apologize… he’d understand.
He had to.
She walked to the coffee table and grabbed her cellphone. Dialed in Jared’s number. The sooner she did damage control, the better.
Just before she hit the green CALL button, she spotted his face in the corner of the television.
He looked exhausted, angry. His face was hard, mouth a flat line, eyes iced over.
Jared Walker spent a night with high school history teacher and project coordinator, Vanessa Adams, after their successful fundraising ball last night. When asked about their relationship, Walker had this to say.
The screen cut to a full screen video of Jared.
My affairs aren’t exactly kept private. I spend most of my nights with models, actresses, television hosts. What the fuck would I be doing with some high school teacher?
Her heart dropped. He didn’t mean that… did he?
He was angry. He was hurt. She’d been cruel, too, and—
She heard a knock on her door.
Spun away from the television to stare at it.
She didn’t move an inch.
He was angry, right? He was angry, and he didn’t mean it. He didn’t mean it. He couldn’t mean it.
He didn’t want anyone to know about her, but…
He said he’d loved her.
Jared loved her.
Jared-
Another knock on the door.
Vanessa bit her lip and walked over, pulling it open.
Jared was standing there. His eyes were tired.
She felt like she might be sick.
“Vanessa, listen-”
“Was it true?” She cut him off.
She told him to go back to his old self, act like an ass, say whatever he had to say to make it go away. That’s what he was doing, right? He didn’t mean it. Of course, he didn’t mean it.
But he didn’t want anyone to know about her…
“You already saw it?”
She was boring. A high school history teacher. What would a drop-dead gorgeous billionaire be doing with a high school history teacher?
She bit her lip and nodded. Both of her hands were shaking.
Models. Actresses. Why would he be with someone like her when he had women like that throwing themselves at him?
Boring. She was boring.
“Baby, I didn’t mean any of that.”
Her heart ached.
Could she believe him? God, she wanted to. With everything in her soul.
She was going to be sick. “I need to go.”
She turned toward the door and went to move inside. He grabbed her arm. The nausea rolled harder and she knew it was coming. She yanked out of his grasp and slammed the door behind her. She covered her mouth with her hand and tried to breath as the tears rolled freely.
“Vanessa, let me in. Vanessa!”
She locked the door and ran to the bathroom, falling to her knees.
At least she’d already put her hair up.
She couldn’t stop shaking. Couldn’t stop crying. Couldn’t think straight at all.
Her routines kept her safe. Her rules kept her safe. Her walls kept her safe. Was this what fun looked like? Well, she didn’t want it. She’d rather never have fun again if it ended like this.
“Vanessa!” She could hear him shouting. Banging on her door.
Strength surged through her as she stood from the bathroom floor and strutted to the door. She yanked it open. “What?”
He froze at the venom in her voice. “Are you okay?”
He didn’t have to know she was collapsing. He didn’t have to know anything.
But she couldn’t lie to him. “I’m not okay, Jared. But it’s not your problem. I need you to leave. Please.” Each breath felt harder to take than the last. Were here lungs collapsing?
She saw a van pull up, a woman jumping out of it and a man following her with a camera. She fisted her hands to stop them from shaking.
“I’ll gather your funds and hand the check over this week. It’s been wonderful working with you.” She closed the door, but his hand pushed it back open.
“Vanessa, talk to me.”
She didn’t want to talk. She wanted to scream and cry and pretend he’d never existed at all. She wanted to hide. No, she needed to hide.
“Baby, please.”
“It’s been a pleasure, Mr. Walker.” She slammed the door shut, and to her surprise, he let it happen. She locked it. Sunk down to the hard floor.
Vanessa was fine being boring. She loved what she did. And she wouldn’t compete with anyone to hold some jerk’s interest.
Maybe he didn’t mean it.
Finding out wasn’t worth the risk.
Chapter Thirteen
Vanessa stared at the television, watching reruns of some old cowboy movie. Why did the heroes always say the right thing, and why were the heroines always so sure of themselves? Vanessa was a pool of self-doubt, and Jared… well, she’d pushed him to be a jerk.
But it didn’t make it hurt any less.
“Do you guys want some tea?” her mom asked.
She opened her mouth to say no, but her dad spoke over her. “We’d love some. How about some peppermint for my girl?” He smiled at her, and she did her best to smile back.
“You got it.” Mom stood and walked into the kitchen.
Vanessa crunched down on a potato chip and continued to stare at the screen.
“So are we gonna talk about it?”
She turned to look at her father. He’d gained some weight, which added a youthful look to his face. His beard was peppered with gray, same as the hair on his head. His eyes matched hers. The kindest eyes you’d ever see.
“Talk about what?”
“Jared.”
Vanessa shook her head and looked away. “Mr. Walker and I worked together, and-”
“Cut the crap, Nessa.”
She froze at his words. Turned back to look at him.
He scooched in closer. “I know what you’re doing. What you always do.” He placed his arm over her shoulders and gave her a squeeze. “You’re pushing him away because you’re scared. You don’t want to get hurt.”
“Dad, I-”
“No, baby. Seeing you two together, the way you looked at each other… sweetheart, I haven’t seen you so happy and carefree since, well, before the accident.” His eyes fell to the floor, and hers followed.
“I shouldn’t be-”
“But you should.” He cut her off almost as much as Jared did. She almost smiled. “You should be happy. You should have fun. You should love and be loved.”
“Dad, it’s not like that.”
“That man loves you. It was clear as day all over his face.”
Her heart raced in her chest. “Dad
, I was awful to him.” She’d yelled, he reacted, and then when he tried to apologize for doing what she told him to do, she slammed the door in his face.
“And he’ll forgive you. Because that’s what you do when you love someone.” He brushed her hair back out of her face, let his palm sit on the side of her head. “When you love them enough, you don’t even get mad. You forgive before you have the chance, then get mad at yourself for forgiving them so easily. But the truth is, it was never them that you were angry with. You, the world, but not them.”
She wrung her hands together, tracing her thumbnail over the lines of her palm. Is that what she’d experienced? The anger towards herself more than him… the desperate attempts to stay mad, to see him as a jerk when she knew deep down he wasn’t one. “I don’t want him to get tired of me. To change his mind.”
He chuckled. Kissed her forehead. “That’s a risk you always take, baby. But real love doesn’t suddenly change, doesn’t get boring. It’s magic. Who could get tired of magic?”
Vanessa laughed. Bit her lip. Turned to look at her father. “Dad, I’m so sorry for everything. I’m sorry about the accident, and your leg, and all the-”
“Stop.” Now he put two hands on her face, staring at her with the same warmth he’d always stared at her with. “You are the best thing to happen to me in my life. I’ve never blamed you for a single thing.”
“But dad, if I just-”
“Enough.” He smiled. “Don’t you remember cooking me breakfast every morning when I couldn’t walk, yet?” She nodded. “How about when you and I would swim every day to help build up my strength?”
The corner of her lips raised at the memory. “We’d walk in circles trying to make a whirlpool.”
His smile grew wider. “We came pretty close!”
She laughed. “My favorite part was when we stopped walking, and the water just carried us.”
His eyes flickered. “That’s what you need to do now. Stop pushing, stop fighting. Let go, let the water carry you.”
She rolled her eyes.
“I’m serious. Those memories were the best of my life. I wouldn’t trade them for anything in the world.” Her brows furrowed as she stared at him, but he didn’t flinch. “Getting hurt gave me more time with you, more ways to build memories. Before that, with how much I was working? I barely saw you. I’d never trade that time or those memories.”
A single tear slipped from her eye without her even realizing it. A decade of guilt seemed to lift from her all at once. “I don’t know what to do.”
She pulled back and wiped the moisture from her cheek on the back of her hand.
“Forgive yourself. Then go tell him you love him.”
“I don’t-” she stopped. He knowingly raised an eyebrow. “Okay,” she finally said. “I’ll try.”
He pulled her into a hug. “That’s my girl.”
She hugged him back and felt hope creep in once more. Maybe Jared had been right… maybe her need for control was all because of a guilt that wasn’t hers to bear. Maybe him walking into her life hadn’t fixed her, but it sure as hell had made it easier for her to try and fix herself.
Maybe she didn’t have to close herself off. Maybe there was another option.
✽ ✽ ✽
“Are you ready?” Gavin poked his head around the opened door of Jared’s office.
He looked up from his computer, then locked it down and stood. “Yep.”
He walked over to Gavin, who blocked the doorway.
“Are you going to move, or were you wanting to be carried?”
Gavin didn’t even chuckle. Shame. “This press conference is important. Please promise me you’re not going to do anything stupid?”
Jared crossed his arms impatiently. “I’m not going to do anything stupid. Happy? Let’s go.”
He pushed forward, but Gavin stopped him again. “Let’s make sure we agree on the definition of stupid, first.”
Jared grunted out a laugh and pushed forward, moving his friend, who turned and followed behind him.
“Three of Vanessa’s students are going to hand over the check, you’re going to take it and thank them, express the foundation’s gratitude, and then you’re going to smile, wave, and get the hell off stage. Got it?”
He had one more thing planned, but… Gavin didn’t need to know about that. “Got it.”
“You’re not going to use this opportunity to talk to Vanessa about the two of you.”
Well, he didn’t want to talk about it, per say. “Sure.” Barely even a lie.
They neared the doors to the conference, but Gavin ran in front of him, placing a hand on his chest and holding a warning in his eyes. “This is about the foundation, not about you, or Vanessa, or anyone else. Okay?”
Jared narrowed his eyes. “Get out of my way, Gavin. You’re a good friend, but I’m definitely not a child who needs to be lectured.”
“Then don’t act like one out there.”
Tension rippled through the air, but Jared relaxed. Gavin had every right to worry about him. And, good judge of character that he was, he probably knew that Jared was lying. But he wasn’t going to do anything bad. As a matter of fact, he’d be doing a whole lot of good.
“Let’s do this.”
His final attempt. His grand gesture. His big moment.
Gavin pushed the doors open and they both walked in, cameras flashing around them.
Through the lights, he spotted Vanessa. She wore the same form-fitting outfit she’d worn when they had first met, with her hair up in a tight bun and her glasses perched just a little too low on her nose.
Oh yeah, he was doing this.
He was getting his girl.
✽ ✽ ✽
“We are super excited to say that we raised twelve thousand, three hundred, and forty-five dollars for The Walker Foundation, in addition to direct donations and care package donations.” Brooke smiled into the microphone, holding the check in her hand.
She was a natural.
“We want to thank Mr. Walker for working with us and teaching us about the cause, and we want to thank everyone who volunteered and donated.” She turned to Jared. “Mr. Walker, thank you for all that you do.”
She handed Jared the check, which he took in one hand and tucked into his pocket. He used the other arm to pull her into a hug, then proceeded to hug Jack and Tracey, the other students who’d been chosen to hand off the funds.
Vanessa smiled and clapped with the rest of the room. She was so proud of her students.
And she was beginning to grow proud of herself. After this was over, she was going to talk to Jared, see if they could fix the mess she’d created over the last few days.
“I can’t thank the incredible students and donors enough.” He turned to the students who’d come to watch from the crowd. “When I was your age, I was goofing off, flunking classes, not caring about a thing.”
He brought his thumb to his lower lip. “Yet you guys were out there, giving away your free time to make a difference. Myself and the rest of The Walker Foundation are incredibly grateful for all the hard work you put in. Please give yourselves a round of applause.”
Vanessa clapped, glowing as she stared at her students enjoying their moment.
There was a special kind of feeling that came with doing good for other people. A feeling Vanessa adored.
“I also have one more person I’d like to thank. Miss Vanessa Adams.” He turned to look at her and the applause continued.
Jared’s eyes went right through her, a softness in them she didn’t think she’d ever seen from him. Or maybe she had seen it once… when he had said that he loved her.
“Miss Adams is the kind of woman who gives everything she has to others, with no expectations of return. She puts her full self into everything she does. She’s a beautiful role model for these students and more than that, she’s a beautiful person.”
Vanessa could feel the heat rushing to her face. She bit her lip, but it did nothing t
o hold back the smile.
Jared only looked at her, then. As if there were nobody else in the room.
“When I met Vanessa, she didn’t like me. Called me an asshole.” She hid her face in her hands as the audience snickered. “But she gave me a shot anyway. Saw through the mask I wore and taught me how to take it off.”
He was only a few feet from her then. He was the only one there. The clicking of cameras, the whispering onlookers— they melted away. It was her and Jared. Nothing else.
“The truth is,” he said, taking her hand in his. “I was terrified of getting serious, vulnerable. If everything was a joke, then you’d never stop laughing, right?” He shook his head. “You broke through every wall I had and I never even saw it coming.”
He moved even closer, there were only a couple inches of space between them. “I know you’re scared. I am, too. But I am head over heels in love with you, Vanessa, and I’m willing to do anything it takes to keep you in my life. Forever.”
The murmurs in the audience barely even registered to her.
He dropped down to his knees.
The gasps around her definitely registered.
“Vanessa Adams. I love you. I want to give you everything in the world. If that means walking away from this position, I’m walking. If it means moving somewhere where nobody knows who I am, I’ll buy the plane tickets. I don’t care what I have to do to keep you.” He reached into his pocket, and pulled out a tiny box.
“I just care that you’re mine.”
He opened it up and revealed the most stunning diamond ring she’d ever seen. Understated, intricate, shimmering. Her dream ring.
But she didn’t care. Because she couldn’t take her eyes off of her dream man.
“I know it’s soon, I know it’s crazy, I know it so doesn’t fit into your carefully planned-”
She knelt down and kissed him. Not a care in the world for the people watching. She kissed him because she needed to, because she belonged to him, because she loved him.
He rose to his feet and lifted her into the air, kissing her back as he spun her in a circle.
She thought she heard applause. She didn’t care.
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