And by the end, yeah. I was shouting. I stopped, fists on my hips and chest heaving, probably all red from the shower and looking ridiculous.
Matthew finally, finally had the good sense to look wary.
Wary, and also shocked. His eyes widened, and he carefully set his jeans aside on a chair, as if afraid they’d start shouting at him too.
“Okaaay,” he said slowly. “So, I’m not sure which part of that to try to argue with first.”
“I didn’t say it because I want you to argue with me!”
“Well, you can’t expect me to just nod and agree, can you?” And now he was angry too, or getting there. His jaw clenched, and his eyes were full-on blazing now.
“Yes, actually,” I ground out. “Yes, I can expect you to nod and agree with me, because nothing I said is arguable.”
Matthew’s eyes narrowed. Oh, shit. I’d activated pack-leader Matthew, who spent all day arguing with his council and with Ian and with various people who were understandably reluctant to loan the pack money.
“One,” he said, and I groaned and turned away. “One!” he repeated, now sounding really fucking pissed. “We have couple routines because we live together. And you’re welcome for the tea, by the way.” I winced. I did feel a little bad about that. A lot of nights Matthew made me something to drink before bed, and I loved it. “Two, I’m not responsible for Nate expressing his feelings via drinking vessel.” He paused, and I felt my face flaming even redder. “Sorry, was that tactless?”
And now he was laughing at me? I whirled on him, ready to give him a huge fucking piece of my mind and possibly claw his face off, and I found him right behind me, having snuck up on me silently in the two seconds since he’d spoken.
Fucking alphas, gods dammit.
I opened my mouth, and he seized me around the waist and grappled us both down onto the bed, landing so hard on top of me that the bed creaked and bounced. He’d managed to get between my legs, and his boxer-clad hips pressed into my naked inner thighs. I wriggled. He moved his hips, and his boxer-clad cock nudged behind my balls.
I gasped up at him, so indignant I couldn’t even fight back.
“Too soon with the water bottle jokes?” He was grinning.
“Nate’s right, Matthew, you are a fucking asshole,” I spat.
His grin faded away, replaced with a thoughtful look that meant trouble. “I thought it was the mate part of the mug that had you so pissed.”
I pushed on his chest. As usual, it was like pushing on a warm, perfectly muscled brick wall. My fingers lingered a little before I yanked them away like they’d been burned. Traitors.
“I’m not pissed. I’m…” Inarticulate? Confused? Either would’ve worked. Trying desperately not to believe in something that seemed impossible?
That too.
Matthew sighed and settled on one elbow, using his other hand to stroke the hair off my face. It’d gotten all tousled, and after I’d spent so much time brushing it out.
“Forget the numbered list. You’re not one of my councilors. Sorry.” He leaned down and kissed me, and I didn’t have the heart to turn my head away. Gods, his lips were wonderful. But he broke the kiss and leaned up again to gaze down at me. “So you’re not a werewolf. What are you, then?”
I blinked up at him. “There’s no way you’re not angry I didn’t tell you before now. And there’s no way that isn’t a problem for you.”
He pressed his lips together. “Actually. Nate told me his wards would’ve activated if another werewolf crossed them, so I was already pretty sure you were something else. I’ve just been waiting for you to want to tell me.”
I’d been agonizing over it, and he’d known the whole time. So fucking typical. “Well, now I’m telling you,” I said. “And don’t tell me it’s not a problem for you, because your council would never go for —” I snapped my mouth shut before one more word could escape.
Fuck. Double fucking fuck.
Matthew stared at me, the beginning of a smile teasing the corners of his lips. “My council would never go for what exactly, Arik?”
My lips were closed, gods dammit. I shook my head and glared at him.
“Because,” he went on implacably, “it almost sounded like you were about to be upset that they wouldn’t accept you as my mate. Which you wouldn’t care about if you didn’t — care.”
“They wouldn’t,” I said, even though I’d been so determined not to say another word. “They wouldn’t.” And that came out sounding…pathetic. Like I really did care.
“Yeah, they would,” Matthew said softly, his eyes glowing. He put his hand to the side of my face, his palm cupping my cheek tenderly. “They would, because they’d have to. If they didn’t, I’d resign as pack leader. And then they’d probably have to deal with Ian. No one wants that.”
He meant it. Gods, he actually meant it.
“Why haven’t you asked me then? Why haven’t you — you let me think you didn’t want more than this.”
“I told you I loved you. I told you five days without you was too fucking much and I wanted you here, with me. And in case that didn’t sink in: I love you. I’m in fucking love with you. I’d mate you right here and now, if you were wondering, and I’m not going to ask anyone’s fucking permission but yours.” He gripped me a little tighter. “I left the ball in your court. Did you really want me following you around like an idiot all day every day, begging you to let me knot you and bite you and keep you forever?”
Well…yes? Fuck. I couldn’t admit that. I couldn’t even admit that to myself without feeling like I belonged on the cover of a teen magazine. Or worse, in a teen magazine’s advice column.
I swallowed hard. “I’m a lynx. A bobcat, specifically.”
Matthew stared for a second and his eyes lit up. “Do you have the…” He took his hand off my face to gesture vaguely at his ear, looking like he was about to burst with the force of suppressed laughter.
“Yes, asshole, I have the cute little tufty ears, fuck.” My cheeks burned, and I scowled at him — until he swooped down and kissed the scowl right off my face.
“I love tufty ears,” he muttered between kisses, “and I love you. Bond with me. I’ll knot you every night and eat your ass until you scream.”
“I don’t — mmm — scream when I’m — mmm — oh, gods,” I cried out, as Matthew abandoned my mouth in favor of moving down.
And then farther down.
It turned out I did scream, and I loved every second of it.
Matthew’s eyes were glowing and his shiny, reddened mouth was stretched in a cocky grin when he left off between my legs and braced himself over me. He’d pushed his boxers off at some point, and his erection was flushed and dripping. A bottle of lube was lost somewhere in the tangled sheets, but he’d already gotten a lot of it on his hand.
I spread my legs even farther, wrapping my hands around the backs of my knees and giving him an unmistakable invitation.
“Like this?” Matthew slid two fingers inside me, making me bite my lip and squirm.
“What do you think?”
“I meant on your back like this.” We’d been experimenting with positions, but mostly I’d either ridden him or he’d fucked me from behind, spooned together on our sides. He never complained — just the opposite — but I knew there was a large part of him (a very large part) that wanted to hold me down and pound me into next week.
I shoved anything other than this moment out of my head. Matthew loved me. I was starting to believe it, even. And there was a part of me (a tight, well-slicked, very eager part) that wanted that too.
“Yeah,” I breathed. “Like this.”
He twisted his fingers and made us both moan, and then fumbled around for the lube and slicked up his cock.
When he sank into me, his whole body pressing me down, I’d never been less afraid in my life. I held myself open, threw my head back, and let him have his way with me. Matthew looped one arm under my waist and lifted me up, holding us both o
ff the bed with the other arm braced in a display of alpha strength that should’ve — who gave a fuck what it should’ve done to me, it made me stare up at him, eyes wide, and come in convulsions that wracked my whole body and made me clench around him hard enough to draw out a groan.
Matthew’s knot swelled inside me, pushing the limits of my body’s capacity, and he collapsed on me, his arm still under my waist and cradling me close. He buried his face in my neck and mouthed at the sensitive skin there. I felt the careful, restrained scrape of his teeth.
“Not tonight?” I whispered.
“Whenever you want,” he said, pressing soft kisses to my throat. “If you ever do. I love you.”
I opened my mouth, but the words got stuck somewhere between my lungs and my lips. I’d never said that to anyone. I was terrified of saying it, even though I knew logically it wouldn’t change anything — not when it was an increasingly louder refrain in my mind, repeating endlessly whenever Matthew smiled at me, or took my hand and kissed it, or looked at me like I was the sunrise and the sunset all in one.
So I went the Han Solo route. “I know,” I said.
Matthew vibrated against me — with laughter, I realized. “Good enough for me, sweetheart.” And he kissed my shoulder and put his head down with a contented sigh.
I wrapped my arms around his back and stroked him. It was good enough for me, too.
Epilogue
I Know
Two months later
The lights of Lancaster were fading in my rearview mirror, and I pressed down on the gas until the pedal hit the floor. Ian’s car surged, growling like an alpha, eating up the miles between me and the Armitage territory.
No, between me and home. I’d been gone for a whole week, even though it was only supposed to be three days. A fledgling pack with only six members was getting established right over the Oregon border, and they’d called Matthew and formally requested the services of his pack shaman for their wards and a few charms to repel a particularly aggressive little band of gnomes who lived nearby. They were tired of having all their cutlery stolen in the middle of the night.
I’d accepted the job, because even though they were only starting out they had cash money, something our pack always needed. I’d kissed Matthew goodbye — and then he’d kissed me goodbye at much greater length, bending me backwards over Ian’s car with a hand fisted in my hair — and I’d headed out, breathless and with my cock straining the front of my jeans, but secretly a little glad to get a few days to myself.
Pack life was a bit much, it turned out. I wasn’t complaining, but…yeah, I needed a few days of relative solitude.
And driving Ian’s million-horsepower monster of a car was a perk I couldn’t turn down. I was the only person he let drive it. The first time I’d seen it I’d practically started drooling and made a few comparisons to Matthew’s Prius that Matthew didn’t appreciate at all. Ian said I deserved it, since I was the only person he knew who drove faster than he did.
Nate just shuddered, rolled his eyes, and went to get a cup of coffee.
Whatever. Nate liked Matthew’s Prius. His opinion wasn’t worth shit.
It was barely getting dark when I roared and rumbled my way down the access road, finally pulling the car carefully into the garage. As the engine quieted, there was nothing but the chirping of early-summer insects and the pinging of cooling metal.
I got out into the humid evening. Matthew wasn’t waiting for me.
I frowned, and that last little bit of worry that I couldn’t persuade away started gnawing at me again. What if a week had been too long, and he’d decided to cut his losses?
That way lay madness, so I grabbed my bag and went inside. A couple of adolescent werewolves looked up from their video games long enough to nod at me, and I nodded back before I headed up the stairs.
There were new scuffs and scratches on the walls, the paint peeled away in a couple of places as if it had been scraped off. Odd, although how this house hadn’t simply given up and fallen down was beyond me.
I turned the corner. Our bedroom door was open, and I could hear Matthew and Ian’s voices. “…dry enough,” Ian was saying dismissively. “It’ll harden completely by tomorrow. But you can use it now.”
I raised an eyebrow. That sounded…dubious. If Ian wasn’t Matthew’s brother, I’d have been charging in demanding to know what the fuck he’d been up to while I was gone.
“It’s not for me,” Matthew said. “You know that.”
“Yeah, Matt. I know. You’re pathetic. You know that, right?”
“Takes one to know one,” Matthew grumbled.
I stepped into the bedroom and dropped my bag. Matthew popped out of the bathroom, his face flushed, his hair a mess, and his clothes and exposed skin liberally spattered with something white. Paint? I sniffed the air. I didn’t smell paint, exactly, but there was something else, something home improvement-related.
“What’s going —” Before I could finish the sentence, Matthew had me pinned up against the wall, kissing me like I’d been gone for months instead of days. He ground his cock into my hip, and I thrust back, simultaneously trying to climb him like a tree.
Giddy joy surged up in me, and I couldn’t pull him close enough, couldn’t kiss him hard enough, wanted my clothes to spontaneously combust so that I could have his skin on mine, now.
“I’ll get my keys back later, fuck,” Ian muttered as he brushed past us and left the room, shutting the door with pointed force behind him.
Matthew pulled back, and I whined in protest. “I have to show you something,” he said breathlessly, and then dived right back in. “Fuck, fuck, I missed you,” he said against my neck. “Fuck.”
“Yes please,” I moaned, and started to tear at his stained clothing.
“No,” he said, and pulled back again. “No, wait, seriously. I need to show you.”
“Show me quickly, then, and get back to the fucking.”
Matthew smiled — gods he was gorgeous like this, all happy and lustful and filthy — and pulled me into the bathroom.
Which wasn’t the same bathroom anymore. It had contained a toilet, a sink with a small counter, and a shower stall.
Now there was barely enough room to get to the toilet and the sink, the shower stall was gone, and filling most of the room was a massive bathtub.
Not just a bathtub. A sunken deal, with jets in the sides, and one side sloping and contoured for maximum lounging potential.
I gaped at it, for once completely, utterly speechless.
Grout. That was what I’d smelled and what was all over Matthew. That was why the walls were gouged and scraped. Matthew and Ian must have carried this monstrous thing up the stairs, a job that would’ve been impossible for a couple of normal human men, and challenging even for two tall alpha werewolves.
“I got it used, I’m sorry,” Matthew was saying, sounding adorably worried. “I bleached the fuck out of it, though. Nate used some magic to make sure it was ‘molecular-level clean,’ whatever that means. It’s — it’s kind of big, but I thought you — do you like it?”
My brain seemed to have stalled out. So had my mouth. I opened and closed it a few times like a landed fish.
He needed me to say something, but — what did you say about something like this? Something that showed a fundamental understanding of what I liked, of me, that no one but my brother had ever taken the time or made the effort to achieve? Most of the time I was gone had to have been spent on this project. That explained why he’d sounded so chill about it when I called to say I’d been delayed, something that had hurt my feelings at the time.
And Matthew had done it himself. He hadn’t hired a contractor or gotten one of the pack to do it. He’d grouted the fucking bathtub himself.
“Bite me,” I gasped.
A short, startled pause. “What?”
I spun around and met Matthew’s eyes. I knew my own were probably wide and wild; his were too. “Bite me. Mate me. Fucking pin me down a
nd take me and knot me and go all alpha and leave your mark on me —”
Matthew growled, his eyes flashed, and he seized me around the waist and hauled me into his arms, dragging me into the bedroom.
Ever since I’d lifted the spell and Matthew had been sane again, he’d been so careful with me. Not always completely gentle, but never rough, and never fully dominant. Not the way he’d been when we’d fucked the first time. He held himself back, he watched me carefully, and he never, ever lost control.
I’d almost forgotten how it felt when he did.
And this time, there wasn’t a trace of fear mixed with my arousal. My whole body sang with it, with being the focus of Matthew’s unrelenting force. He shredded my clothes with his claws, kissed and nipped and licked me everywhere, and I writhed under him, gasping encouragement and pleas.
He flipped me onto my stomach, the pillow cool against my burning cheek and my legs splayed at an angle that left me completely exposed to him. I was helpless, totally under his control, and I knew that a single word from me would stop him. His breath fanned hot over the back of my neck as he pressed between my thighs, his hands hot and rough on my fevered skin.
“I’m going to fuck you,” he breathed. “Fuck you so hard and deep you’ll be feeling it for days. You’re mine, Arik. Fucking mine.”
I canted my hips up even farther, presenting myself like the submissive alpha’s mate I’d never thought I’d want to be.
Not that I’d be submitting anywhere else. But here — here, with Matthew’s heat and strength and power sheltering and claiming me, I could be whatever I wanted to be. No barriers. No restrictions, and no fear.
Matthew took me by the hips and thrust into me in one hard motion.
I didn’t try to hide what I felt. I clawed the bed — really clawed, as my fingers were shifting without my conscious input. I screamed, and I begged, and I pushed my ass up to meet him until he fucked me so hard I collapsed onto my belly.
He hauled me back up again and fucked me mercilessly. We weren’t two separate people anymore, but one, surging and hot and desperate and filled with the same need.
Captive Mate (Mismatched Mates Book 2) Page 21
