The Italian Surgeon's Secret Baby

by Sue MacKay

  ‘When did she wake?’

  ‘Shh,’ she warned, finger to her lips, her arm wound around Aimee as she rocked back and forth.

  Aimee stirred.

  Elene was holding her breath.

  Mattia eased down beside her, wrapped his hand carefully around one tiny covered foot and enjoyed being with his girls, hoping his action wouldn’t wake Aimee but unable to resist her.

  Slowly Aimee settled again.

  As did Mattia’s heart. This was special, being part of his own family. Yet there was something hovering in the back of his head like a warning. Get real. You’re already including Elene in every picture you have of Aimee’s future. Aimee and Elene and you. Stop hiding behind your daughter and accept Elene means the world to you. Get over the past.

  Swallowing hard, he croaked, ‘Aimee woke you?’ This was such a normal family scene—he wasn’t used to it but he wanted more. Lots more.

  Elene nodded, that messed-up hair covering half her face. ‘About forty minutes ago. She needed changing. When that didn’t settle her I gave her milk which, fingers crossed, has worked.’

  ‘I was out of it.’

  ‘I thought I was, but seems I’ve developed the mothering instinct.’

  So this was what his brothers meant when they said having kids changed everything and yet everything remained the same. He wanted Elene in his bed again, yet knowing he’d have to wait wasn’t a problem.

  ‘Can I do anything?’ he whispered.

  Her swollen lips cracked into a big smile. ‘Probably not what you’re used to post-coital, but I’d die for a cup of tea.’

  ‘You’re right, haven’t had that request before. But then I haven’t had my own child, or anyone else’s, to wake me after I’ve been having amazing sex.’

  ‘You’re not looking too concerned about it.’

  ‘Surprising, isn’t it?’ Aimee looked so cute, snuggled against Elene, her little chest rising and falling on each noisy breath. He risked running a finger over his little girl’s arm, felt her vulnerability. A lump formed in his throat. ‘You know what? I like having her here. With you,’ he added. ‘You’re a pair.’ My pair. ‘I’m glad, relieved, happy, to know Aimee’s got you.’

  A solitary tear rolled down Elene’s cheek, and he followed it with his finger.

  ‘I mean it. You’re her mother now, and always will be. We’ve a way to go making this work but I believe we will.’ His lips brushed her cheek, where that tear had left a trail. ‘I promise to do all I can to achieve it.’

  Elene wanted to lean into Mattia and accept his promise without thought. It would be so easy. He accepted her role in Aimee’s life. He accepted Aimee for his own, and wanted to share her life. What more could she want? It was her turn to give back, and she was more than willing. They’d spent the most magical time in his bed. She was halfway to being in love with him. Did she say now that she’d move to Sorrento permanently? When she’d missed her family these past days more than she’d have believed? Could Mattia and Aimee become her new family? He hadn’t offered that. She’d be foolish to leap in and show all her cards. Or would she? Part of her wanted to. Her past warned her not to. ‘Thank you,’ was all she managed.

  ‘I’m not sure where that leaves me,’ he said. ‘So I’ll go make that tea, just to show I can be of use when required.’

  ‘Mattia.’ Elene reached for his hand. ‘You’ve paid me a huge compliment. I feel it in here.’ She tapped her chest beside Aimee’s head. ‘I arrived in Sorrento expecting—and looking for—a fight, for your reactions to be about what you wanted, with little regard for me and how I felt about Aimee. I was wrong. Sorry.’

  His smile could’ve lit up a town. It certainly lit up her heart. ‘We’re doing fine, Elene. Just fine. There’s a way to go, but I’m liking the journey so far.’

  Her return smile came from her heart. ‘You just want more sex.’

  ‘There is that.’ His hand splayed across his chest and his smile became a wicked grin. ‘Before or after the cup of tea?’

  Aimee chose that moment to open her eyes and stare up at them. Elene felt her heart expand. Then she looked at Mattia and saw the love shining out of those dark eyes, and her heart grew to include him. She was lost to him. Fight it, argue with herself, whatever—she loved Mattia. Probably had begun to since that night back in Wellington. He was handling this so well, and he wasn’t as closed to accepting what life tossed at him as she’d believed. It made sense for her to make the major sacrifice over where to live. He had more to give up and, while moving here would bring difficulties, it wouldn’t be all bad.

  ‘Ma-ma-ma-ma.’ Aimee interrupted her thoughts.

  ‘Hey, sweetheart. Say Papà.’

  ‘Ma-ma-ma-ma.’

  ‘Okay, we’ll get there.’ Standing, she stretched up to kiss Mattia. ‘Let’s skip the tea.’ He was never going to fall in love with her. Because of what Sandy had done to him, the shackles weren’t going to fall from around his heart. So she’d love him from the sidelines, and hope that was enough. But for the next week there was nothing stopping her having a good time, while getting to where they needed to be on a wave of optimism and not through a mire of disagreements and second-guessing.

  She got her tea an hour later, sitting up in Mattia’s bed, her muscles barely able to function enough to keep her upright. If that was what great sex did then she’d been missing out all along. Until Mattia. Man, oh, man. Did he know what he was doing? Her doubts over being good enough had fled. Mattia made her lose her inhibitions, turned her more adventurous and willing to give as good as she got.

  Lying beside her, hands behind his head, staring at the ceiling, Mattia took her breath away. Then his next words tightened her throat. ‘Please don’t take the timing of this next question the wrong way. I’m feeling more relaxed than I have since the moment I set eyes on you nearly two weeks ago, and I want to ask you something important.’ His gaze moved from the ceiling to her. ‘Is there any possibility that you would move to Sorrento permanently? I think we’ve shown we can make it work.’

  D-day. Make that D-hour. She should be getting in a pickle, but she’d already reached the decision, found her answer. Deep down she’d accepted what Mattia wanted, and there weren’t enough reasonable arguments to put up against him. She’d miss her family not being close by on a daily basis. Her job, her cottage, her sports groups? Replaceable. Her closest friend was gone, and there weren’t others so much a part of her life she couldn’t move away. ‘Yes.’

  ‘That’s it? Yes?’ Hope started rising in his eyes.

  Hope she understood because she felt it every day. For her, the hope was that Mattia wouldn’t fight her over the joint custody issue, that they’d share. If that meant moving to a country she wasn’t exactly a foreigner in, then getting brave and stepping up had to happen. ‘Yes.’

  ‘Thank you.’ He sat up and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. ‘We can decide how this all comes together over the next few weeks. Thank goodness for phones, eh?’

  She smiled through the doubts already creeping in and shoved them aside to get on with her new life. ‘Not quite as good as face-to-face though.’

  ‘I want you to be completely happy with whatever arrangements we make.’

  Throwing in some unbelievable sex would make it that much easier. Though that would stop soon. Mattia didn’t do permanent, and she was only just coming round to the idea of trying for permanency herself. Except she’d gone and fallen in love with the man. The truth had been niggling away at her for days. Now it was right in front of her eyes, in her heart. She was in trouble. Warm tea sloshed onto her chest.

  ‘Hey, careful.’ He handed her the box of tissues to wipe up. ‘What were you thinking about that got you all jumpy?’

  You. Me. Love.

  ‘All the stuff I’ll have to pack and shift over here.’ It was the best she could come up with and
not spill her heart.

  Mattia took her chin between his fingers and turned her head so she had to look at him. ‘I’ll let you off this one, but let’s try and stay truthful with each other. It’ll make everything that much easier.’

  Like why you couldn’t make it to breakfast?

  Elene sighed. She wasn’t getting into an argument. ‘Just my nerves getting in the way of logic.’ She put her mug aside and slid down the bed, tugging Mattia to join her. If they weren’t going to be this close for ever then she would take what she could while it was available. She chuckled. Overnight she’d become insatiable, and so far she couldn’t fault it.

  * * *

  Sunday morning brought more sunshine. ‘Doesn’t it ever rain here?’ Elene was thinking of the storms that regularly lashed Wellington. Her home town wasn’t known as Windy Wellington for nothing, and while this endless sunshine was wonderful she could almost wish for a small storm. Almost.

  Mattia laughed. ‘Are you seriously saying you’d prefer to be back home with winter screaming across the Cook Strait?’

  ‘It’s not that bad.’ In fact it could be invigorating. And wet, and cold, and—home. But she wasn’t missing home. Not when Mattia was taking her and Aimee to Napoli for the family lunch later in the morning. Sofia had phoned for a chinwag yesterday, talking about anything and everything as friends did. She’d made Elene feel welcome and homesick for her sisters at the same time.

  ‘Want to go shopping again?’ Mattia asked from where he was loading the dishwasher.

  She’d love to. She was so over the few clothes she’d brought with her. But Mattia might offer to pay for her and that would be a slippery slope. It could become a habit and then he’d be right in thinking that she wanted to get what she could from him. ‘Not today.’

  ‘I won’t ask the other female in the house. My mother’s already bought out the shops for her.’

  It was true. Aimee now had more outfits than she’d ever wear before she outgrew them. Maria enjoyed indulging her grandchildren. If Sofia hadn’t told her Maria did the same for Giulia and Marco, Elene might’ve suspected her of deliberately overdoing it to show what Aimee could have if Elene brought her to live here full-time. Mattia had suggested they shouldn’t say anything about what they’d agreed while they worked out the details or his mother would want a say in everything.

  ‘Aimee looks gorgeous in that dress Maria brought on Friday.’ Elene hadn’t been able to resist dressing her girl in the pretty dress for their outing.

  The day went without a hitch, and Elene felt as though she’d been dropping by on Sundays for ever. Sofia and Alessia had as many questions as the previous week while they sat in the back yard with their wines, watching the kids play and laughing and talking nonstop.

  Mattia regularly checked that Elene was happy and had whatever she needed. ‘He’s just as attentive as Marco,’ Sofia said around a laugh. ‘Watch out, Elene. The man’s getting serious.’

  ‘Don’t go getting ideas,’ she warned. About to say more, she looked up to find Mattia standing in the doorway watching her. It was obvious he’d heard Sofia’s comment and her reply—and he didn’t seem upset at her answer.

  Her heart banged. Which was silly when she knew there was no hope in that direction. Typical. When she’d finally moved on from the past she’d fallen for a man who had his own issues to deal with before he’d reciprocate her feelings, if he could. Homesickness swamped her. Her sisters would know what to say, would tell her to get Mattia out of her system and find someone to love her properly. Neither of them had had their hearts broken yet and believed moving onto the next man was a matter of putting one foot in front of the other. Long might that last for them. But if only they were here. Or she was at home, sitting around the table catching up on family news and nonsense. But they weren’t, and she wasn’t. She was in Naples with Mattia and his family, being made to feel she might belong. She should be grateful, not sad. Deep breath then. ‘Where’s the best place in Napoli to buy shoes? I promised myself I’d take a couple of pairs home with me.’

  Alessia sighed and did an eye-roll. ‘Now I know we’re best friends. I’ll take you to my favourite shop this week.’

  ‘We could have lunch at Prego’s,’ Sofia said.

  ‘Knew you’d want to come,’ Alessia laughed.

  ‘Sisters united,’ Sofia scoffed.

  Elene wasn’t so sure about sisterhood yet. ‘I work most mornings, and then there’s Aimee to think about.’

  ‘We’ll have a late lunch. Maria can look after all three children.’ Sofia was checking her diary on her phone. ‘I can do Wednesday.’

  ‘Works for me,’ Alessia said. ‘Elene?’

  She gave up pretending she didn’t want to go out with these two. ‘Wednesday’s good. I’ll catch a train up so I’ll be a while getting to the city.’

  ‘Anna can drive you and Aimee up,’ Mattia said from behind. So much for thinking he’d returned inside.

  ‘Done. Thank you, everyone.’ Then Elene thought about the housekeeper. ‘If it’s all right with Anna.’

  ‘It will be.’ Then Mattia said, ‘Lunch’s ready,’ and waited to take Elene’s elbow to lead her inside.

  * * *

  On Tuesday Maria came down to Sorrento to spend time with her granddaughter, and stayed on while Mattia again took Elene out to dinner.

  ‘Seems your mother can’t get enough of Aimee,’ Elene commented halfway through the entrée.

  ‘You’re heading home on Saturday. Naturally she wants to spend time with her granddaughter.’

  ‘Fair enough.’ Mattia had relented and told the family on Sunday that Elene would be moving to Sorrento permanently. Everyone was genuinely thrilled. She had yet to break the news to her family.

  Mattia put down his fork. ‘I’ve been thinking about where you should live. There’s plenty of room in my house for us not to get under each other’s feet all the time.’

  Elene ignored the tightening of her heart. He’d only said what she already knew. They were not going to be sharing the same bedroom. She suspected the nights of passion wouldn’t be picked up when she returned to live here, that Mattia would use the break to end the fling. He was a flings man, not one for commitment. ‘I think I’d prefer a small place of my own, an apartment, maybe.’

  ‘The problem is finding one that isn’t rented out to vacationers in summer. There’d be more opportunity in the towns between here and Napoli, but then you wouldn’t be close for me to drop by after work.’

  ‘But living in your home won’t work long-term. We’d want privacy to come and go as we please, with who we please,’ she added to see how he reacted.

  He gulped down the mouthful of seafood he’d been chewing. ‘True.’

  ‘What would it cost me to buy here? Ballpark figure.’ She could sell her cottage back home since she wouldn’t be living there. Plus she had an investment from her grandmother that could be used.

  ‘That won’t be necessary.’

  ‘I’d prefer that to renting long-term. I’d need your advice on the best areas for safety and weather.’

  ‘I repeat, that won’t be happening. If there’s any property purchase happening I’ll do it.’

  ‘Mattia, without starting an argument, I get to decide where to live, and to choose my own home.’ One moment she believed they were on the same wavelength, the next Mattia proved her wrong. Indignation rose. ‘I can afford this.’ I think. Shouldn’t have said that until she’d checked out prices. Not that she’d let him pay.

  ‘You don’t know the system here, won’t know what to look out for in a property.’

  ‘Then you can help me, or put me in touch with a realtor you trust.’

  ‘Why don’t you give me a list of what’s important to you and let me do the job?’ He didn’t give up easily.

  But she’d known that. It was one of his endearing char
acteristics when it wasn’t aimed at wrecking her requirements. ‘Because I can’t tell you what the X factor will be, what that undefinable something that ticks my boxes will be. When I bought the cottage it had everything I was looking for, as did most of the places I’d seen, but the cottage touched me in some way. Its warmth, quirky kitchen, the tree out the back. Things I hadn’t believed I’d care about.’

  ‘I’ve never bought a house so I don’t understand. I presumed it was all about getting value for money, the right location, sun angles, not quirky anything.’ His smile said he was trying to understand her need to make her own choices.

  ‘If I found a property I loved I’d certainly want your opinion, and someone to make sure it wasn’t going to get washed off the hill in the next rain deluge.’ She’d worked too hard to get where she was, and wasn’t about to toss it away.

  ‘If you’re giving up your home to move to my side of the world then you must let me make it as easy as possible for you. If that means buying you a property then I will. And—’ he held his hand up ‘—I want to give you something back for all you’ve done for Aimee and me.’

  Her tongue stuck to the roof of her mouth. This was still Mattia, with his kindness and thoughtfulness, but he liked, maybe needed, because of what Sandy had done, to be in charge. A sip of her wine loosened her tongue enough to speak. ‘Bet you never thought you’d be saying that to me.’ She had to go for the light-hearted approach or spill her heart, and he wasn’t ready for that.

  Already there was withdrawal going on in his eyes. ‘Funny how life flips you on your head when least expected.’

  Lifting her fork, she watched him. Whatever he was thinking, he wasn’t about to turn into a monster. If only he wanted to share more with her than raising a child. A shiver caught her. Mattia might be feeling close to her but he didn’t love her. She had to accept that or living here would be hell.

  Starting now with accepting how it would be, she said, ‘This gnocchi with four cheese sauce is divine.’ It really was. One thing she’d never complain about in this country was the food. ‘Just like Mum makes.’ Talking on the phone to her mother wasn’t the same. She needed to see her expressions, feel her warmth, love. Love. She had it in abundance back home. Now she’d have to cultivate some here. Her eyes lifted to the man sitting opposite her, wanting to see and feel his love.