He put me down, and I stared into those dark brown eyes, now with nothing but pride in them. With a soft smile, he wiped my wet cheek with his thumb, his warm breath on my face. My heart pounded as the seconds drew out between us, and I struggled to find the words to express my gratitude to him and to fate, for allowing me this sweet victory.
I lifted my head, intending to thank him or say something more profound, but the words died in my throat. There was something new in his eyes, something that sent twin shocks of fear and exhilaration into my stomach. My tongue swept across my lips, tasting salt and anticipation as he tucked a lock of hair behind my ear and sent an electric charge down my back.
Slowly, he lowered his head and captured my lips in a sweet kiss. My mind went blank, and I tilted my chin upward, inviting him to continue. When he didn't, I opened my eyes into his, surprised to find a rolling storm of emotions there. He seemed to be waiting for me to react, to push him away.
But we both knew I could fight him off, and he hadn't crossed any lines I hadn't left open for him. As angry as he made me, as frustrating as his rules and protectiveness was, what I felt for him had gone beyond friendship, or even that of a queen to her captain. And now that he'd stepped over that line, I wanted more.
I took a step toward him, sliding my hands over his strong chest, the soft fabric of his tunic sending chills up my spine. The taste of him remained on my tongue, and, craving more, I pressed a soft kiss to his jaw. He tensed, swallowing hard. I swiped my fingertips across his stubbly cheek, in need of a shave, to brush the short hair on the back of his neck.
He released a soft sigh, and then his lips were on mine again.
This time, there was nothing soft or chaste about it. My back hit the wall, his hand resting on the base of my skull as he assaulted my mouth. It was all I could do to keep up, too distracted by the way his body fit against mine, the thoughts of what might happen if we continued. The sensation of his tongue moving with mine, the way he moaned when I gripped the front of his shirt and pulled him closer. If I let him, he would have me right there against the wall. And I was definitely considering it.
But just like that, it was over.
"We need to go," he whispered, his face flushed and lips swollen. "Beswick and contracts."
I nodded, the papers dangling in my hand. "Can we…continue this later?"
He kissed me, but this time only for a moment. "Let's go."
Chapter 41
Felix and I rushed back to the castle, my lips still tingling from his kiss. It was hard to stay focused. All I wanted was to ask Felix to meet me in my room. But Titta and her girls were counting on me; making out could wait.
Riya sent a messenger to Garwood's home with an urgent message to meet me in my office and there, I paced by myself. Felix had left to get Riya, and I wasn't sure why I expected him to return, but I wanted him to. Perhaps he was preparing celebrations. Or the arrest warrant.
Finally, after an eternity, Garwood arrived, and I didn't even give him a chance to take off his traveling clothes. "You need to give me permission to arrest Beswick."
He blinked a few times. "I'm sorry, what?"
"Arrest Beswick. I need you to help me convince the Council to do it tonight."
"Just take a deep breath," Garwood said, pulling his hat off. "And explain to me why you want to arrest one of the most prominent businessmen in the city."
"Because he's a crook, and I can prove he's been engaging in treason," I replied.
"Why don't you start at the beginning?" Garwood said, sitting on the chair.
I told him a modified version of the truth, that my investigator had been looking into him for several weeks now, spurred by rumors of his treasonous activities.
"I know, Brynna," he said. "I hear all the time from constituents who are too far in debt to him, and want something done about him. But unfortunately, there's nothing to be done."
"Ah, well, there used to be," I said. "I'd heard whispers that perhaps he was dealing under the table with Kulka and Severia."
Garwood nodded. "Hence why you entered into that ill-advised agreement with the queen."
"Yes," I said. "It was designed to flush out Beswick, and, I'm glad to say, it worked." I pulled the contracts from inside my tunic. "Read these."
Garwood pulled out his glasses and read through the papers. His brow furrowed, but I couldn't decide if he was surprised, angry, or perhaps just confused. The longer the silence stretched out, the more anxious I became.
"Brynna, I'm afraid this isn't as much as you think," he said, pulling off his glasses. "Certainly not enough to make an arrest."
"W-what are you talking about?" I said, coming to my feet. "It's…it's illegal for a Forcadel business to agree to anything without the sovereign's permission."
"And who do you think brokered this agreement between Severia and Beswick in the first place?" Garwood asked.
I blinked. "Who?"
"Your father, of course."
I lowered myself to the chair, sounds of confusion and disbelief bubbling from my lips. "He…did what? Why would he do that?"
"Well, our merchants wanted to get Severian glass for a fraction of the price, but the Severians wouldn't budge. So Johann stepped in and promised them he'd protect our interests."
"And he's also the one they need protection from!" I leaned back in the chair. "He's the one taking half their glass. How could anyone think this was a fair deal?"
"It's very fair to our merchants in Forcadel," Garwood said. "They get good quality glass at a cheap price and they pass those savings onto the rest of the citizens."
"But the Severians—"
"Are not your people, and therefore, not your concern. If Queen Ilara wanted something different, she could assign a few of her royal guard to helping guard their shipments."
"She can't afford that," I said. "It's a vicious cycle. They can't get ahead. Just like all the citizens in Forcadel who owe money to Beswick. He gives them just enough rope to hang themselves."
"I know that some of his dealings are unsavory," he said evasively. "But it's a necessary evil we have to live with. He does a lot of good—"
"If you say his paying for the festival was a good thing..."
Garwood pursed his lips. "He did pay for it. He pays for it every year and he's responsible for bringing in all the vendors and artisans. It brings an incredible amount of revenue to the city, and boosts morale." Garwood cleared his throat. "He's also made a sizable donation to support your coronation."
"Give it back," I said, standing. "I don't want his money anywhere near my coronation. I want him hanged."
"I understand—"
"You understand nothing," I cried, slamming my hands down on his desk. "You say we have to live with him because he's rich. But he's only rich because he's bleeding our citizens dry. Severia might not be my concern, but the people of this city are. And I can't idly stand by while a common criminal continues to keep them from prosperity. Now, find me something I can arrest him with, or I will replace you on my Council."
Garwood threaded his fingers together. "I'm not sure there is anything, Brynna. Beside your father's approval of this treaty, the rest of the Council has agreements or deals with him. Vernice negotiated a similar deal with the Kulkans, and from what I understand, gets a lovely cut of the profits. Godfryd lives in a Beswick-owned manor on the south side of town, and Beswick often gives scholarships to young children so they can join the king's guard. And Octavius—"
"Is a drunk and frequents his taverns."
"Well, he is a drunk, but he's also a gambler. But all his debts are brushed aside, of course."
"Of course." I swallowed my frustrations. "So I have to replace my entire Council just so I can take this guy down, huh?"
"Inadvisable. You need some semblance of consistency, especially considering the turmoil at the throne these past few weeks."
I could've just screamed. It just wasn't fair—after all I'd done, all the sacrifices. Crawling around o
n my hands and knees, running across the rooftops of this city. And even as queen, Beswick remained firmly out of my reach.
"I'm sorry, Brynna. If there was something I could do, I would. But my hands are tied."
I nodded and stood, grabbing the contracts off his desk and leaving without another word.
I returned to my newly furnished room and punched a few holes in the air to keep myself from crying. I couldn't keep a single thought in my head for more than a moment. I was scattered, I was exhausted. I needed my captain.
But my captain didn't show.
When the clock struck midnight, I finally walked out into the hallway, finding Joella waiting with a stoic look on her face.
"Where is Felix?" I asked. "I sent for him hours ago. We need to talk about what to do about Beswick."
"He told me to tell you he's taking care of Titta," she replied. "And that you should get some rest."
I narrowed my eyes. "So he knows about Garwood? He knows that the Council is doing nothing?"
"Yes," she said with a sigh. "He said not to worry about it."
Dumbfounded, I returned to my room. While I was grateful he'd thought to take care of Titta and her girls, it didn't solve the larger problem. Despite his advice, I didn't sleep, sitting on my windowsill and staring out into the night, my mind buzzing with anger, betrayal, and I wasn't sure what.
But when I didn't see Felix at breakfast, lunch, or a very annoying dinner with Lord Melwin and Vernice, I was fit to be tied. No one was giving me any news, other than continued assurance that everything was fine. But I didn't want to hear that.
I marched outside, grabbing Joella by the tunic and slamming her against the wall. "Take me to Felix. Now."
Too shocked to argue, she nodded.
We walked silently down to the barracks, perhaps the murderous look on my face enough to keep the younger guards away from me. Joella stopped in front of Felix's door and knocked.
"Captain? Are you in there?"
"Come in," came his gruff voice as the door unlocked.
I pushed past Joella, marching into the room.
"Brynna!" Felix said, nearly falling off the bed. I'd never seen him in such a state of undress. He was shirtless, with only a pair of black pants untied at the waist giving me a view of defined muscles on his stomach and hairless chest. His feet were bare, the stubble on his skin even darker than the day before.
"Where have you been?" I snapped, folding my arms over my chest.
"I'm sorry," he said, grabbing his tunic from the floor and sliding it over his head. I tried not to stare at the spot below his navel.
"Is that all you have to say?" I cried. "Felix, Garwood shut me down. My father sanctioned the contract with Beswick and it has the full support of the Council. And—"
"Brynna, that kiss was…a mistake."
I froze, all thoughts of Garwood out the door. "What?"
"It was a mistake. I got caught up in the moment and I forgot my place. I'm sorry."
"Sorry?" I put my hands on my hips, shocked that something could still shock me. "You're sorry for kissing me?"
"I'm your captain, Brynna," he said. "And besides that, even if we were to act on it, it wouldn't go anywhere. You've got to marry for an alliance—"
"I'm not even thinking about that right now," I barked, keeping my anger burning so I wouldn't break down into tears. "I just…I just want to be with you."
He cast me a look somewhere between terrified and nauseated. "I think, perhaps…" He licked his lips. "I should take another position in the guard."
I fell backward against the window ledge. "W…what?"
"It's for the best. Until you and I lose whatever…emotions caused us to make a rash decision last night. We can't be together. Not even for a little while."
My anger was losing to my tears. It was bad enough that Felix didn't want to be with me, but now he wanted to be out of my life completely?
"So that's how you feel?" My voice sounded far away.
"It doesn't matter what I want. It matters what's best for the kingdom. If I stay, if this becomes something more, then I won't be able to do my job effectively. I already haven't been able to do it effectively. Letting you get that close to Beswick, letting you out of the castle at all." He shook his head. "All it takes is a little pout and I lose track of what's right and wrong."
My frustrations from the day spilled from my eyes, and I let them. "Felix, Garwood said my father was responsible for the Beswick contracts. He sanctioned them. I'm no closer to taking him out than I was a week ago and now you're…talking about leaving. You need to stay and help me fix this."
"I'm…sorry," Felix said. "I know how much it meant to you."
"It's not about me! It's about this kingdom. He's a criminal and we're just letting him get away with it."
"You can readdress it when you're queen," he said. "But for now, just let it go."
My tears ceased as quickly as they'd come. I turned to the window and exhaled loudly through my nose. "So that's it, then? We failed, and you're just giving up like that?"
"I don't want to give up, Brynna, but I can't be around you anymore. It's what's best for both of us. You have others you can lean on. Kat, Garwood—
"Garwood is dead to me."
"Don't be a child."
I smiled. There was the old Felix. "I want you around, Felix."
"And that's precisely why I should leave," he said.
"Fine," I whispered, looking at the sill as my chest hurt. "Then pack your bags. I'm sending you to Kulka to marry one of King Neshua's sisters. You said I needed to make a strong ally, and they want me to fulfill their contract. So you can go, if you're so eager to leave."
I waited for his sharp intake of breath, for him to tell me that I was crazy for sending him away from the only home he'd ever known, but instead, I got silence.
"You've been telling me all this time that it's time to start thinking like a queen and not do whatever the hell I want," I said. "Well, now I'm thinking like a queen. I need their alliance, and you're the only person who's actually on my side in this castle. So you'll go there, marry one of them, have some Kulkan babies, and maintain the alliance."
He continued to say nothing.
"But if you disagree for any reason, please tell me," I finished, turning to him, finally.
"I don't think it's a bad match," he said after a moment. "In fact, it's a very smart move."
"So there are no objections?" I whispered.
He grasped the hilt of his sword tightly. "No."
"Good," I said after a moment. "Then make arrangements to find your replacement as captain."
"I will."
"And start packing. You're going back with the envoy."
"Agreed."
"And you have no objections at all?" I held my breath. For someone who fought me at every turn, to have him nod and bow as I dictated his life to him was strange.
"None."
And with that, I turned and walked out of his room, keeping my tears at bay until I was alone, and then I collapsed onto my bed.
Chapter 42
"I suppose that will work," Melwin said with a slow nod. "He's noble-born, yes?"
"Oh yes," I said, my simmering rage keeping my voice calm. Felix had formally resigned his post this morning, naming Riya as his temporary successor until the Council approved her. All of this he'd done via a letter delivered with my breakfast.
Coward. I was glad I was sending him away.
I'd asked for the Kulkan envoy to come to my office first thing so we could discuss it in private. I doubted there would be any outcry from the Council; half of them thought Felix ineffective anyway.
"He'll make an excellent match to any of your eligible princesses," I continued. "He's well-educated in politics and can help mentor your soldiers."
"The fourth daughter of the king is just now twenty," Melwin said. "I'm sure King Neshua will be most happy to have her marry into such a strong alliance."
"It works for
me," I replied. "And we will call my marriage contract settled then?"
"I suppose, for now." He winked at me. "But you will have to marry eventually. Must keep that strong Lonsdale blood on the throne. You know, your great-great uncle married into the Kingdom of Kulka."
"I'm sure I'll get around to it eventually," I said with a smile. "Thank you for being so understanding."
"But of course! We value our alliance with your country." He beamed. "I'm sure you're excited about your coronation this week, hm?"
"Ecstatic," I replied, lacking the energy to even pretend I was anything other than miserable.
He left shortly after that, and I was alone to sign and stamp papers. Normally, I dreaded this work, but today, I was grateful for the monotony. It was better than jumping back and forth between disgust at my government and fury at my captain.
Around lunch, there was a knock at the door, and Joella, Coyle, Riya, and about ten other guards filled my office.
"Are you here to arrest me again?" I said, sitting back.
"No," Joella said. "We're here to formally protest the removal of Captain Felix and his impending departure to Kulka."
I rolled my eyes. "Take it up with him. It was his idea."
Joella made a noise and looked at Riya, who stepped forward. "I don't believe that. He wouldn't willingly leave us for another kingdom. Not unless you forced him to."
"I didn't force him to do anything. It's usually the other way around, in case you forgot," I replied, picking up a paper on the order of linens for the castle. Why was I even responsible for ordering linens?
"Brynna…this isn't some ploy so you can continue as The Veil, is it?" Joella asked. "Because the rest of us will make sure you stay at the castle."
To be honest, the thought hadn't even crossed my mind. There was nothing but disgust and hurt for all the men I'd trusted in my life so far. This was why I hadn't gotten close to Tasha. No chance of heartbreak with him. Just mediocre sex and no questions.
The worst betrayal, though, was my father's. To find out he'd been in cahoots with Beswick, even as I'd worked to take the slumlord down, was a hurt that I wouldn't soon forget. And Garwood, acting like he had no recourse. Both of them disgusted me.
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