by Tina Cambria
“Want some help?”
What was he asking? He wanted to rub a buttery substance on her abdomen?
She didn’t know whether it was the effect of those increasing hormone levels or the way Kyle looked in his jeans with his bare chest and morning stubble and mussed-up hair. Or maybe the fact that she’d been dreaming about him all night—whatever it was, she suddenly wanted nothing more than to have him caress her skin with something moist and silky.
And the sight of his broad, muscled chest wasn’t doing a thing to make her think she might be making a mistake. She looked him right in the eye and handed him the shopping bag. “Sure. I could use some help.” Turning and heading into her bedroom, she heard his heavy breathing as he followed right behind her.
Before she knew it, Kyle had the lid off the jar of shea butter. Standing face-to-face with her, he tenderly fondled her tummy with the creamy mixture. His gentle strokes sent a rush of warmth right down the path of that dark line he’d mentioned.
Had he sent a similar blast of heat through her when he’d touched her in Vegas? He must have. And she didn’t think she’d be able to resist if he wanted to do more than pat her skin.
That rush of warmth diffused throughout her lower abdomen. She wanted Kyle’s touch down there, but she also longed for his mouth on hers. She wanted his skin on hers, his tongue on hers, the heat of him everywhere on her body.
“Just say the word, darlin’,” he whispered. “We can take this to the limit.”
What was stopping them? She was already pregnant, so there were no worries about contraception. And the doctor had said it was okay to have sex.
Looking into Kyle’s smoldering eyes, she searched for something that would jog her memory of the time they’d spent together in Vegas. A look, an expression he’d used, a certain way he’d touched her. But nothing seemed familiar. It was all new.
She decided that she didn’t care whether or not she remembered him from before. The past few weeks together had shown her what kind of man he was. A man she was growing to care about. The only thing she wanted now was to feel Kyle inside of her.
“I’m saying the word,” she murmured. “I’m ready for you.”
There was no gentle exploration, no leisurely build-up, no relaxed rhythm. It was as though they’d both been longing for this for months, and they couldn’t wait a minute longer.
After that, she lost track of everything except that he was taking her somewhere she couldn’t remember ever being. If she’d soared like this before, she knew it must have been with him. She just couldn’t remember it. But she wasn’t going to forget this time.
And then she came back to earth.
A marriage takes more than scorching sex.
There was no denying that she loved the way Kyle had just made her feel. But was she sure she loved him?
CHAPTER NINE
He hadn’t been intending to start their Saturday morning that way. Absolutely mind-blowing sex. Even with her slightly sprouting belly, Danielle was irresistible.
Somehow the stars had aligned, and they’d both felt that magnetic pull, that desire to come together in a most intimate release.
It was as good as what he remembered from their week in Vegas. Better, actually. Because a decent amount of their honeymoon week had been spent with a what-the-hell mindset. Once they’d made love that very first night after their hot tub escapade, neither one of them wanted to spend the rest of the week together without experiencing that again.
And again.
There was no way to change the fact that they’d made love without protection that first time in Vegas. So, he’d made sure they wouldn’t make that mistake a second time. By stocking up on condoms at the resort gift shop.
With each passing day, they’d felt more comfortable with each other. Developed the seeds of a friendship. Liked the way friendship and physical desire were working together. Wondered if they might have a future together.
By the end of the week, Kyle had been about ninety-seven-percent sure that he’d found his one and only. He figured Danielle had been at about eighty-five-percent certainty. She just needed to go back home to New Loudon, spend a little time around her shy and scared so-called former fiancé to confirm they were undeniably finished for good, and she’d probably decide within an hour that no one but Kyle could make her happy for the rest of her life.
Now, as he lay spooned against her derriere with his right arm draped around her torso, he was tempted to ask if what they’d done a few minutes earlier had sealed the deal for her. Had his lovemaking stirred any of those lost memories? And made her remember what had been in her heart when they’d parted in Vegas?
But he knew better than to ask those probing questions. If her memory—or any part of it—had returned as a result of their passion, she’d surely tell him. No sense frustrating her further by asking if she’d finally remembered him. Because if the answer was no, there was no point in reinforcing the disappointment.
Feeling her begin to stir, he traced protective circles over the tiny bump of her abdomen with his right hand.
Danielle let out a long sigh. “I’m not sure that was such a good idea.”
“What we just did?” He couldn’t resist pressing closer into her provocatively rounded behind. “I happen to think it was an extremely good idea. Anything that feels that amazing has got to be a good idea.”
“I’m not saying it didn’t feel good—”
“Good? That was so much more than good. Award-winning kind of feelings. Makes you want to come back for a heaping second helping kind of thing.”
“About the second helping…”
“I’m ready if you are.”
She shimmied around to face him. “If that’s what you made me feel like in Vegas, you can’t imagine how much I regret not being able to remember it.”
“I can do all kinds of new things that I guarantee you’ll never forget.” He pulled her closer.
“I doubt I’ll ever forget what happened a few minutes ago.”
“It can happen again.”
“Kyle…” She placed her palms on each side of his face and pushed him away. “I’ve got to figure out how I feel about…us. And not just in bed. The complete us. Everyday life in addition to lovemaking. It won’t work if it’s just about sex.”
“No matter how fantastic I can make you feel?”
She shook her head. “It’s not enough. There has to be something more.”
What more did she want? He’d offered to stand by her and make sure that she and the baby received the medical care they needed. He’d offered her a place to stay while she awaited the baby’s birth—and pretty much given her carte blanche to decorate the apartment however she wanted. In his mind, they’d been getting along great since they’d arrived in Cottonwood Ridge.
And he’d just proven to her that he had the goods to keep her more than satisfied in the bedroom.
What else do I have to do?
“Could you give me an idea of what that something more might be?” Why keep speculating about it when he could ask her outright?
Danielle squirmed, sat up in bed, yanked a quilt that was draping the footboard, and wrapped it over her shoulders. “It’s not easy to define,” she said.
“You couldn’t possibly still be yearning for that guy Walter—”
“No, not at all.”
“You told me a few things about him back in Vegas.”
“I-I don’t remember…”
“Something about him keeping you at arm’s length for two long years,” Kyle said.
“You make it sound like he pushed me away.”
“Danielle, you have to admit it’s not normal for a healthy young guy not to make any kind of move on an attractive woman who’s supposed to be his girlfriend—”
“Walter is a gentleman. What’s wrong with that?”
“For two years? Get real.”
“Everyone moves at a different pace.” She shrugged.
“You made a c
onfession to me during our honeymoon,” Kyle said.
“A confession? That’s crazy. I can’t think of anything I would’ve needed to confess.”
“It was about Walter.”
“That’s impossible.”
“You told me that you’ve always craved a sense of security—”
“Well, who doesn’t?”
“You said your parents had what you called a turbulent, short-lived marriage.” Kyle looked deep into her eyes. “And then you grew up watching your mother struggle to raise you virtually alone. And she wouldn’t have made it without help from Nana Rose.”
“I’m not the only kid who grew up that way.”
“I know, but you admitted that it left you with an almost overwhelming fear of an unstable, unreliable husband.”
“No woman wants a husband like that.”
“But most women wouldn’t settle for an incredibly boring man just because he had a stable income and almost no desire to wander from home.”
“What are you talking about?” Danielle’s eyes blazed.
“Come on, you know I just described Walter Ferguson right down to his socks.”
“Incredibly boring?”
“Uh, yeah, I’d say so.” Kyle grinned. “Pretty much the most unexciting guy in the state of Colorado, but you told me his family owns an upholstery business that’s virtually cornered the market for re-covering Western-style furniture in a good part of the southwestern region of the country. Plus a few big-ticket contracts with hotels and resorts.”
“How do you know all that?”
“You told me when we were in Vegas.” Kyle cocked his head. “And you said when his father passed away a few years ago, Walter stepped up to be the head honcho. The self-proclaimed King of Colorado Chair Cushions.”
“You could’ve easily found all of that out by searching on the internet.”
“But I didn’t have to, because you told me.”
Danielle opened her mouth to respond, but before she could answer, her phone buzzed on the night table. They both looked at the phone as Walter Ferguson’s name lit up the screen.
“What the hell is he calling you for?” Kyle struggled not to explode as he ground his teeth.
Could he actually be competing with this guy to win back the heart of his own wife? It was insane. And even more insane was that Walter had never even seemed to want Danielle’s heart. The way Danielle had explained it during their honeymoon, Walter was laser-focused on showing his mother that he could make their upholstery business even more successful than his father had. Didn’t she remember that?
But that car accident had robbed her of the feelings that had grown during the time she’d spent with Kyle. Now he had to convince her that he was in love with her for all the right reasons.
And after that, he had to convince himself that she had fallen back in love with him for all the right reasons.
* * *
Danielle gaped at her phone and Walter’s name flashing at her. He hadn’t called her once in the six months she was in California. And she’d only briefly seen him twice that she recalled since returning to Colorado. Why would he call her now?
“Let it go to voicemail,” Kyle said. “Whatever it is can wait.”
“What if it’s about Nana Rose?”
“Why would he be calling you about it?”
Danielle reached for the phone, and Kyle firmly covered her hand with his. “If it’s important, he’ll leave a message,” he said, and stared hard at her. “We just made love a few minutes ago. You don’t need to talk to him now.”
She had to admit he was right. If something had happened with Nana Rose, someone from the Ponderosa Manor Apartments would call her. Or Leslie would call. She worked at the hospital and knew just about everything that happened within its walls.
But what if Nana Rose actually were in the hospital?
Stop letting your imagination go wild. If she were, Walter wouldn’t be the one to notify you.
“You’re right.” Danielle turned away from the night table and the phone that had finally stopped buzzing. “It’s just that Nana is getting up in years, and I worry that something could happen to her.”
“She looked pretty healthy to me.”
“So, now you’re a doctor?”
“I’m only saying that she seems very active, especially for…how old is Nana Rose, anyway?”
“She turned seventy a few months ago.”
“In today’s world, that’s not necessarily old.” Kyle patted her shoulder. “Still, I understand how you’d worry about your grandmother, especially since she pretty much raised you. Why don’t you check in with her later?”
Kyle didn’t know that she’d promised to text Nana twice a day to confirm she was safe with him. This probably wasn’t a good time to tell him about that arrangement. “Yeah, I’ll do that.”
He slid his hand from her shoulder to beneath the quilt she clutched over her breasts and pulled her snugly against him. “You still haven’t told me what that something more is that you’re looking for.”
His caress set her tingling again. Was she making the biggest mistake of her life by telling Kyle that he needed to do more than take her breath away, send electric sparks through her core, and leave her desperate for more?
Take a deep breath, and let the butterflies inside you settle down.
Baby between them or not, she wasn’t going to let physical hunger guide her decision-making process. Maybe she’d done that when she first met Kyle. She had no idea what had prompted her to make those decisions back in the heat of summer.
“You and I got off to a crazy start. There’s no other way to describe it.” She couldn’t imagine any sane person describing the way they’d ended up married as anything but irrational, senseless, even foolish. “But we don’t have to keep acting that way. For the sake of our child’s future, we need to act responsibly. Make sure we’re truly suited for each other.”
“I think you’re still not sure I can give you the security you were looking for with Walter.”
“Wait—what?” She recoiled as though she’d come up against a cement wall. “Why are we still talking about Walter?”
“Nobody has to say anything. He’s the elephant in the room. A big gray mass right in the middle of everything, but you keep looking the other way and pretending not to see it.”
Had Walter been that important to her? She’d known him most of her life, gone to school with him, and gotten friendly after they’d both returned home to New Loudon after college. People started calling them a couple. She started calling him her fiancé. And he called her his fiancée too.
Didn’t he?
Now, she couldn’t remember for sure.
A lot of details about Walter seemed kind of blurry. Why did she call him her fiancé if they’d never actually discussed marriage? The closest they’d come was when she’d occasionally throw in a reference to after we’re married… And now that she thought about it, Walter had usually found a way to change the subject.
Another tiny drop of water broke free from that mental ice cube.
Danielle had finished packing the last of her possessions into her car before leaving L.A. And she’d been dreading the inevitable I-told-you-so lecture from Walter when she arrived back in Colorado. She could almost hear his voice. Did you finally get it out of your system, Danielle? Now are you ready to settle down and focus on being a teacher?
Her decision to take a break from her super-reliable teaching job to try to make it big in Hollywood had probably been her way of seeing if there were something else out there for her. But she was sure she’d had no intention of trying to heat things up with Walter when she got back to Colorado. It was firm in her mind the whole time she’d been in California that she was done waiting for him to show some interest.
Was that why she’d so quickly glommed on to Kyle when their paths had crossed?
“I’m not sure you should refer to Walter as an elephant…” she eventually said, shak
ing her head.
“You know what I mean. You’re an English teacher, for God’s sake. Don’t you teach your students about metaphors?”
“Of course, I do. But I usually come up with more abstract examples. I rarely refer to someone we actually know as an elephant. Or use any derogatory term.”
“I guess I shouldn’t have compared this to a classroom exercise. Because this is a real-life, grown-up problem.”
“Look, I don’t care about Walter anymore. I haven’t for a long time. And are you saying that us getting to know each other better before we focus so much on sex is a problem?” If she’d jumped in too quickly in Vegas, she didn’t want to repeat her mistake. “Isn’t that the way it’s normally done?”
“Nothing about us is normal. Our relationship has been unusual from the moment we met.” He threw up his hands. “And I’m fine with us getting to know each other better. What happened between us this morning was chemistry…like an explosion in the lab when two heated chemicals get too close and nature takes its course.”
She pulled away from his embrace. “Maybe we need to dial it back for a while to make things a little more cookie-cutter.”
“Is that what you think will solve everything? Because I already know I want to stay married to you.” He sent Danielle a look that tore at her insides. “But I’m not sure you feel the same way about me.”
* * *
Kyle imagined a version of dialing their relationship back that was probably not the same as Danielle’s idea. And he’d never been much for baking, so he had no interest in anything to do with cookie cutters.
“It’s Saturday, and I’ve got the whole day off from work. Here’s what I think.” He swept his fingertips along her jawline. “You and I should go on a date.”
“A date? But we’re already living together.” Danielle scrunched her eyebrows.
“So, let’s get out of the house and enjoy what this town’s got to offer.”
“Such as?”
Kyle tilted his head from side to side. “There’s an outdoor craft show downtown. They’ve got something like fifty artists displaying their work. A lot of them are staying at my resort.”
