by DJ Jamison
“Maybe,” Gil said, though he sounded dubious. “I don’t know.”
Avery rapped the table with his knuckles. “Right. He could be bluffing. There’s only one way to find out.”
“And that is…”
Avery took a big swallow of his beer. Then grinned at Gil. “Guess I have to get engaged.”
“Wait, what?”
Avery nodded. “You keep telling me to do something. Well, you’re right. I have to call my father’s bluff.”
“Oh, Avery, I don’t know…”
“I’ve got the perfect person in mind to help me.”
“Uh…who is that?”
“Rory Fisher.”
“Rory, the guy who left you because you wouldn’t leave the closet? How is he the right—”
“Because he’s here,” Avery said, feeling euphoric as intoxication, years of regret and longing, and a desire to break free all coalesced into the best idea ever. “It’s fate, man. It’s like the universe is telling me to make my father put his money where his mouth is. He’s always got a reason, an excuse, a loophole. Well this time, I’ve got the loophole, and I’m going to take it.”
“By getting engaged,” Gil said disbelievingly. “To a man who dumped you.”
Avery laughed. “Crazy, right?”
“Yes,” Gil said emphatically.
“Good.” Avery shoved back his chair. “Because I’ve tried sane and respectful and calm. It’s time for a little crazy. It’s time for drastic action.”
“Yeah, but Avery…”
He held up a finger. “Hold that thought. I have to go propose to the man who got away.”
Lana was relaxing, finally. They sat with their dishes pushed aside, elbows on the table, talking like friends. They’d gotten through the hard part. Lana had told him, haltingly, of her ex-husband’s abuse, of their messy divorce, of his custody challenge. She was living with her girlfriend now, and he’d threatened to take her daughter away from her “sick lifestyle.” He’d also suggested that if she went back to him, the whole matter could be dropped.
Manipulative bastard.
“He’s a powerful man,” she’d said fearfully. “I don’t know how I can fight him.”
That’s where Equal Justice League came in. They didn’t just provide legal aid—like some agencies—they matched clients with the best legal representation they could find. They worked on all sorts of cases at all levels, civil and criminal.
“We’re going to help you.” He clasped her hand. “You’re not alone with this. Neither is Keena. It will take a few days to process this and then I’ll be in touch, but feel free to call me with any questions or concerns. If your ex-husband tries to make contact or make any threatening phone calls, anything that worries you, I want you to alert us right away. That will all be important evidence in your case.”
She nodded. “Thank you.”
They both scooted out of the booth and stood. Rory held out his hand, but Lana hugged him. “Thank you so much.”
He withdrew with a smile. This is why he loved his job. The relief in Lana’s voice. The tears gathering in the corners of her eyes. The realization, finally, that she wasn’t alone in this battle. She had someone on her side.
“I better let you get home to Keena.”
“Yes, I—”
“Rory!”
Rory and Lana both startled and turned at the too-loud voice. Avery Kinkaid swaggered up to him. “You’re just the man I want to see.”
“Avery, I’m in the middle of something here.”
“Sorry.” Avery cast a glance at Lana. “Rory’s the best, isn’t he?”
“Yes.” She laughed a little, clearly noticing, as Rory had, that Avery had had far too much to drink.
“I love him,” Avery said simply, shocking Rory.
“What?” he said, stunned that Avery would blurt that out. It wasn’t even remotely true; they barely knew each other anymore. But beyond that, Avery was in the closet. He didn’t just go around making love confessions in public. “How drunk are you?”
Lana backed up. “I think I should leave you two to work this out.”
“I’m so sorry, Lana.”
She smiled brightly. “It’s fine. It’s sweet, even.”
As she backed away, still shooting them curious glances over her shoulder, Rory turned on Avery. “Just what the hell—”
He choked on his angry words when Avery abruptly dropped. He thought at first that he was falling. His heart lurched as he grabbed for him.
But Avery wasn’t falling. No. He was lowering himself. On purpose.
Rory stared down, utterly confused, at Avery Kinkaid on one knee before him. Looking up at him, Avery said, “Rory Fisher, will you marry me?”
“Are you out of your damn mind?” Rory hissed, reaching for his arm to drag him up. “You must be crazy.”
“I am. I’m crazy, Rory,” Avery confirmed, still grinning. “Marry me anyway?”
“No!”
“Please?”
“No.”
Rory reached into the booth and grabbed his jacket, sliding it on, while Avery slumped into the seat that Lana had vacated. “Well, that didn’t go as planned.”
“Did you actually have a plan?” Rory asked, even though he knew he shouldn’t engage. Avery was obviously having some sort of drunken crisis. But a tiny part of Rory was curious what had brought on such a drastic proposal. Good God, a man had proposed to him. Avery Kinkaid, no less!
Once, he would have given just about anything for Avery to commit to being his boyfriend, much less propose. Now? The idea was preposterous.
Rory withdrew his wallet and tossed a few bills on the table. As he attempted to turn away, Avery caught hold of his wrist. “Rory.”
Rory kept his eyes down, unable to look into that handsome face that had so often been his undoing. “I really need to get home. It’s a worknight. You interrupted a work meeting.”
“I’m sorry.” Avery sighed. “I messed everything up.”
Rory tugged gently, and Avery released him. “It’s fine.”
“It’s not fine,” Avery said, sounding sad. “It probably never will be fine.”
A short, dark-haired man arrived. He wore wire-rim glasses, slacks, and a wrinkled button-down, as if he’d come to the bar and grill straight from the office. He looked vaguely familiar, but Rory couldn’t place him.
“Avery! Time to go,” he said. Looking to Rory, he said, “I’m so sorry if he upset you.”
“It’s okay,” Rory said, even though he was still reeling. “I think you should get him home, though.”
“I will.” He extended his hand. “I’m Gil.”
“Rory.”
“Oh, I know,” Gil said with a small smile. “I heard all about you, even before I watched you put Avery in his place at the gala last week.”
“Hey,” Avery protested without much heat.
Gil tugged Avery to his feet. “Come on, big guy. Let’s get you a Lyft ride home.”
A horrible thought struck Rory. “Wait, you two aren’t…”
“No,” they both exclaimed, looking horrified at the notion.
“Just friends,” Gil said. “For a long time now.”
Rory nodded, relieved. “Okay, then. Goodnight.”
Not knowing what else to say, or what to think of Avery’s surprise proposal, he headed for the exit. He could hear the two friends holding a murmured conversation behind him. Rory resisted the urge to look over his shoulder for one more glimpse.
4
Rory stared at the Microsoft Excel sheet before him, willing the numbers to change. The campaign funding goal was far too high, the donations total too low. He’d never bridge the gap in three months. And his leads from the gala he’d attended were too far and few between.
I should have worked that room harder. And spent less time talking to a certain someone.
Someone who’d proposed to him the night before. What was that about? It wasn’t like Avery to risk outing himself.
Even spending so much time talking one-on-one with Rory at the gala was out of character. Back when they’d been together, Avery had gone to great pains to ensure most of their school friends thought they hated one another while sneaking sex with Rory on the side. Memories of those days still made him hot—with both arousal and embarrassment. They were just fumbling kids. Those moments were hardly worth holding onto for a decade. And yet, there’d been something about their chemistry, the need they felt, that had never been matched in Rory’s life.
He shook off the thoughts, trying to focus. There had to be a way to salvage this. He couldn’t give up, even if it seemed hopeless. Lana Porter would get the help she needed, but there was always another Lana around the corner, feeling like they had no resources, facing a more powerful opponent with huge stakes: their children, their freedom, their liberties.
Rory opened his calculator app on his phone, tapping in each row, even though the Excel sheet did the math for him. He’d just check it again. Maybe there’d been a glitch and a few zeros had magically disappeared.
Very likely, Fisher. Very fucking likely.
A tap at the door caught his attention. When he looked up, his biggest distraction was standing there in jeans and a blue pullover hoodie.
“Have coffee with me?” Avery held out a cup. “I got you a mocha. I hope you still like them.”
“Chocolate never goes out of style,” Rory admitted grudgingly.
Avery took that as an invitation to come into Rory’s office, handing him a coffee cup before taking a seat across from him, where Rory’s clients usually sat. Meeting Lana outside the office had been unusual, but she’d had transportation and child-care challenges that had set back their meeting twice already. It was just happenstance that put him and Avery at the same bar and grill the night before. Rory had never eaten there before. The Cajun pasta was just okay, so he probably wouldn’t be eating there often in the future, either.
But Lana had been sweet.
“Do you have a minute to talk?” Avery asked.
His right leg jiggled, and he took a quick drink of his coffee. To hide his nerves, Rory thought. Avery presented a confident face to the world, but Rory knew there was a lot of anxiety teaming beneath the surface. Usually related to his sexuality. He almost felt sorry for him—until he remembered that Avery’s fears had overruled his feelings for Rory, leaving them both brokenhearted.
“You’re not going to propose again?” Rory checked.
Avery chuckled, sounding embarrassed. “No, I’m here to apologize.”
Rory swiveled his seat to fully face Avery and hide that ugly spreadsheet from his view. Even if he didn’t have time, he’d make it. He was curious what would inspire Avery—even while drunk—to make such a crazy proposal.
“Yes, ‘Lucy, you have some splainin’ to do.’”
Avery’s lips quirked. “You still a big fan of Lucy?”
“Of course.” Rory said, though he hadn’t watched any old episodes in a long time. While in school, they’d watched an old episode of I Love Lucy for a lesson—he could no longer remember why—and he’d gotten hooked on old reruns of it. It had become his comfort watch whenever he was feeling low. Lucy didn’t give a fuck what anyone thought; she was real and funny and true to herself, always.
In a lot of ways, Lucy gave him the strength to walk away from Avery. No way would Lucy let someone dim her light, tuck her away somewhere hidden, ashamed to acknowledge her. No, Lucy was too bright not to shine. And Rory…he was far from the bright, beautiful starlet on that television show, but he wanted someone to let him shine in his own special way, even if it was just listening to him get on his soapbox and supporting his vision for a better world.
“But enough stalling,” Rory added. “I really do want an explanation. That was…”
“Insanity, I know,” Avery said ruefully. “I had too much to drink, as you no doubt noticed.”
Rory nodded but kept quiet so Avery would continue.
“I’d had an argument with my father. Another argument. We go in circles. I want to come out, and he wants me to wait for the right time. Of course, it’s never the right time,” Avery said bitterly.
That surprised Rory. Avery had seemed so determined not to come out in high school. And when he was still closeted years later, Rory assumed he’d be one of those men who’d just never come out. Who perhaps would lead a double life, getting married to a woman and cruising for men on the sly.
“I didn’t realize you’d come out to your father.”
Avery nodded. “Yeah, when my mother died. I don’t know if you remember…”
“Early in our senior year. I remember.” Avery had been devastated by her death. It had been sudden, and he’d been a wreck for weeks, maybe months.
“I came out to him then. I figured I didn’t have much more to lose. I already felt like I was dying inside.”
Jesus. Rory’s heart squeezed. “I’m so sorry.”
Avery waved a hand, clearing his throat. “All in the past. My father asked me to hold off on coming out. He didn’t want to overshadow her memorial, and I understood that. I was just so relieved he didn’t call me a sinner or toss me out on my ass. He said he loved me. And…that felt like enough. At the time.”
“But not now?”
Avery shook his head. “He’s been stringing me along and I’ve been being trying to remain patient, but now he’s supporting some anti-LGBTQ legislation, and I was just so angry. He said it wouldn’t affect me because I’m in the closet. That if I had a fiancé, it might be different. He knows I can’t really date, being in the closet like this. He’s been manipulating me for years, and he plans to keep on doing it unless something changes. I just wanted to call his bluff.”
It was a lot to process. “Wait, so, what if I’d said yes?”
Avery winced. “We would have gotten engaged?”
“Did you plan to string me along again, then cut me loose once you played your father?”
“It’s not like that. I was drunk. I didn’t think through the consequences of my actions.”
“Clearly,” Rory muttered.
“I would never try to manipulate you or be dishonest with you,” Avery continued. “That’s why I’m here, explaining. I’m sorry that I sideswiped you with this proposal out of nowhere. I thought… Well, I don’t know what I was thinking. That if I got engaged, I could not only call my father’s bluff about me, but also get him to withdraw support from that legislation, maybe. But that doesn’t excuse it. I’m sorry.”
Rory drank his cooling coffee, so he could think. He was still digesting the salient points: Avery was still in the closet because he hadn’t stood up to his father; his dad was manipulative; Senator Kinkaid was backing a bill that wasn’t good for the LGBTQ community; and Avery was looking for a way to fight back.
With an ill-advised, impulsive proposal to make his father own up to his lies.
“He might not have withdrawn his support from the bill,” Rory said gently. “I know he said that would make the difference. But if he’s been actively keeping you in the closet…”
“I know.” Avery sounded exhausted. Beaten down and worn out. Combined with his obvious hangover, he was pitiful enough to tug at Rory’s heartstrings. “I just wanted to try something. And even if he didn’t change his stance, my engagement would be newsworthy. It would draw attention to him and the legislation, maybe. Hell, I don’t know. It was a crazy idea. I just felt like I should do something for once.”
Rory swallowed the words that Avery could just come out without the theatrics. It hadn’t worked in high school, and it wouldn’t work now. Avery had never been strong enough to defy his father. He still wasn’t if he was looking for a loophole.
“Anyway, I brought my checkbook,” Avery said, pulling it from the large pocket on the front of his hoodie. “How’s ten thousand sound for the pain and suffering of a ridiculous marriage proposal?”
Rory couldn’t suppress a smile at Avery’s deprecating humor. “Genero
us, but not really enough to solve my funding problem.”
But perhaps there was a solution sitting before him. Rory couldn’t ask Avery to close their funding shortfall, but he did have some pull with the Kinkaid Foundation, which worked with donors who had deep pockets. If he could pull off a gala of his own to benefit the Equal Justice League with the help of an organization like that…
Avery flipped open his checkbook on Rory’s desk and reached for a pen. “I can do fifteen?”
Rory placed his hand over Avery’s to stop him from writing. “Wait.”
Avery looked up, his deep blue eyes full of questions. Rory was playing with fire here, with handsome, charming, sexy fire. But he couldn’t stop thinking about his best friend Caleb, how he’d entered a fake relationship with a marriage contract to save his family’s resort and stand up to a powerful man.
They wouldn’t have to do anything nearly so complex. No contracts, no actual marriage. But they could help each other, while also standing up to Drake Kinkaid.
“What if I said yes?” Rory asked.
Avery dropped the pen.
Avery thought he might be hearing things, even as his heart lurched, sure that he wasn’t.
“What…?” Avery stopped to lick his lips. “I mean, I must have misunderstood you.”
“What if I became your fiancé?” Rory clarified, before adding. “We wouldn’t have to actually get married. We’d just fake it long enough to call out your dad.”
Avery hadn’t considered that possibility. When he’d proposed, it’d been genuine. One hundred percent crazy, but genuine. He’d always loved Rory, and maybe some part of him had recognized that Rory would want to help him fight his father in this particular battle. Even if he hadn’t put it into words the night before.
And here Rory was, offering a solution.
“You’d do that?”
He and Rory hadn’t parted on the best terms when they were eighteen. Rory had left him, telling him that he’d chosen to live a lie and he wouldn’t enable it. Now, here he was agreeing to be part of a lie with him. How times had changed. It wasn’t the same, of course. Rory was offering to pretend to love him to enable him to come out—and possibly get his father to change his position on that awful legislation—not to love him while remaining a secret to appease Avery’s father.
