by Blair Holden
So yes, it’s tough, and it’s difficult to go so long without seeing Cole, and yes, I have the occasional sob fest, but at the end of the day, I see our temporary separation for what it is—a chance to grow up and to define ourselves as individuals before we dive headfirst into our lives together.
***
On my way back home that night something happens that’s never happened before, and I don’t quite know what to make of it. I’m well aware that I’m not the only one living in the building and that I do have my fair share of neighbors. It’s yet another fallback of my antisocial nature that I haven’t gotten myself acquainted with anyone on my floor let alone the building. I think we work odd hours, and although I’ve seen people in passing and in the elevator, there’s never been any time for chitchat.
Which is why I’m surprised when as I’m making my way out of the elevator, juggling five different bags of groceries and my bag and my keys, nearly spilling the contents of all of the above on the floor, I have a very kind stranger help me and grab some of my bags before I drop them.
“Whoa, are you okay?”
In so many ways I’m not, but I bet this guy doesn’t want to hear about my existential crisis, so I give him the short, brief, normal answer.
“Kind of, though I would have had my groceries rolling down the hallway if it wasn’t for your help. Thank you.”
When we straighten up and I get a chance to look at him, I’m surprised to see that the guy looks about my age, give or take a few years older. My dad told me that most of the residents of my building are older couples or families with young children. I think that’s one of the reasons he really wanted me to stay here; you can’t get in a lot of trouble when everyone around you is worrying about play dates and school runs. But this guy, I don’t think my dad knows about this resident. He’s tall, on the lanky side, with one of those serious-looking faces. His eyes are close set and covered by a pair of thick-framed, probably designer glasses, a Roman nose sitting haughtily on his face, and pouty lips. He’s got a naturally tan complexion and I can see a hint of a tattoo peeking out from beneath the collar of his shirt. He’s dressed like a lot of the men you’d see on the streets in New York, stylish but quirky, with an all-monochrome outfit paired with something more statement, in his case, his sneakers with cobalt blue detailing.
“No problem, where’d you like me to carry these?”
I point him toward my apartment, which in hindsight isn’t the best decision. He could be an ax murderer, for all I know. But as we’re carrying my bags in that direction, I hear a door opening behind us and a faint, elderly voice.
“Nathan, honey, you forgot to take the leftovers.”
I turn to see an older woman, close to Nana Stone’s age, emerge from one of the apartments down the hall. She’s holding on to a Tupperware container and looking pointedly in our direction. Nathan, I assume, is the guy that’s helping me.
“I’ll be right back, Grandma, just helping your neighbor…” he looks at me, as if to ask my name, and I answer with a quick, “Tessa,” “…your neighbor Tessa with her bags. I’ll be right back.”
“Oh, bless you.” She looks almost giddily from me to her grandson and goes back into her apartment. I’ve seen her around a couple of times, usually when I’m rushing out in the morning and she comes out to get her morning paper. This guy, Nathan, must be her grandson, and I do not like the way she was practically glowing as she left us alone.
“Where were we going again?”
Oh right, I can’t let the poor man lift what likely is nearly fifty pounds of junk food in those environmentally responsible shopping bags.
“Oh gosh, I’m so sorry, this way.” Together we lug the bags all the way to my apartment, which is conveniently located much farther away from the rest of the residents on this floor, thanks to my family and their tendency to take overprotective to a whole new level.
I let the bags go and unlock the door, dumping everything in my hands onto the kitchen counter the moment I enter. Nathan waits hesitantly at the doorstep until I invite him in.
“Thank you so much. I don’t know why I thought I could have carried these all the way home by myself.”
He shrugs. “It’s not a problem. I help my grandma out with her supermarket run at least once a week, so I’ve mastered the art of carrying bags that weigh as much as I do.”
I cringe, realizing that I must have gone right at it in the chocolate and ice cream aisle, as a way to deal with the blow that fate has dealt me. I took one look at the airplane ticket waiting for me in my inbox and realized that I needed to binge and binge fast.
“So are you new around here?” he asks, shoving his hands in his pockets and subtly surveying the place, which I hope isn’t too much of a mess.
“Yup, just moved in a couple of weeks ago.”
“So, I think you’re the blonde grandma keeps insisting I meet.” He laughs and runs a hand through his hair. “I think she’s ecstatic that we ran into each other today. I’m Nathan.”
He extends his hand, which I shake for a second. “Tessa, like I said before.”
Keeping in mind that I can’t hold up a conversation with a complete stranger for more than ten seconds without it getting awkward, I find myself struggling for words to say.
“So, thanks again. Can I get you something to drink at least?”
For the record, I don’t keep a lot of alcohol in the house, despite being legally allowed to drink. I just don’t suit drinking because I’m that lightweight who will agree to give away her firstborn child after the first couple of sips of wine. So, as a precautionary measure, I don’t surround myself with the enticement but, given that this man helped me, I probably should offer him more than soda.
“No, I should probably head out.” He gestures outside. “Grandma’s probably waiting in the hallway wanting to hear all about how we’re headed off to Vegas to get married next.”
I laugh; that sounds like such a Nana Stone thing to say.
“Does she live alone?” I ask.
He shrugs. “We’ve tried to make her move in with my parents but she’s not very agreeable. This place is great, but we worry, you know? It’s been a few years since Grandpa died.”
My heart begins to hurt and I make a mental note to try to get to know her and just keep an eye on things.
“Well, if you need any help, just let me know.”
He grins. “That’d be great. I try coming by as much as I can, but it’ll be good to know that there’s someone looking out for her.”
“I definitely will.”
And I think that’s how I made my first non-work acquaintance in the city.
***
“Hey.” I call Cole a few days later, wondering if he’s still planning on heading home and feeling terrible that I don’t want him to.
I’m calling at our regular time, when the two of us are so bone tired that keeping our eyes open is a challenge in itself. I’ve had a particularly hard day at work, having been on my feet all day since Amy’s assistant called in sick. After running errands and getting lost all over the city, I just wanted to go home, soak in my bathtub, and have a nice, long nap. But that’s not going to happen.
I don’t let Cole know but I’m flying out in a couple of hours, having only come home to shower, change clothes, grab my suitcase, and get out the door.
“You sound exhausted.” He laughs. “But so do I. We really should find a better time to talk.”
I hear him walking around his apartment, hear the sound of a closet being opened and shut. Maybe he’s packing as well?
“I know, right?” I stifle a yawn, eyeing the coffee that I’ve left brewing in the kitchen. “But first tell me, how’s your dad?”
“Cassandra’s put him on bed rest, no questions asked. She said she needs to monitor his heart and run some tests, so he’s agreed, obviously not very easily.”
“That’s good, though, are you still going home?”
“They don’t want me to.” He sighs and I picture
him massaging his temples. Recently, with the amount of stress he’s been under, he’s had headaches more often than not. I’m taken back to a time when he’d just crash with his head in my lap and I’d just sit there, letting him sleep and massaging his head.
Of course he’d return the favor twofold. I feel a headache of my own building when I think of the week ahead of me.
“If you think you need to go, you should. No regrets.”
“Yeah, no regrets,” he agrees and we switch to FaceTime. I make sure that my suitcase isn’t in the background when I settle down on my bed. Looking at the clock, I have less than two hours to get my stuff together and rush to the airport. But all that can wait, Cole needs someone to talk to and Amy can grab her own Starbucks for once in her life.
“So how’s your week been so far?”
I tell him about my nice neighbor, Linda, who now thinks it’s her responsibility to deliver handmade treats to my door. I also tell him about Nathan, who, now that I know about, I notice more and more in and around the building.
“Oh,” there’s a slight tension in his face and I can see his jaw lock, “has this guy been coming around a lot?”
I roll my eyes. “He’s not a serial killer, I promise. He’s a good guy, takes care of his grandma a lot. Actually, the two really remind me of you and Nana Stone. We should really try to see her more often.”
“She’s actually coming home and staying with Dad for a few weeks.”
I laugh. “Wow, Cassandra really pulled out the big guns this time around, didn’t she?”
“She did. She thinks having me come home would be a bit of an overkill since Jay’s ready to fly out as well.” I wince at the hurt tone in his voice.
“She’s probably right, you know. If Sheriff Stone feels like you’re all conspiring against him, he’ll be at the station faster than you can hide his handcuffs.”
“I just…I want to be there for him, but he’s so stubborn. They want me to focus on school and keep my grades up, but I’m out here worrying if he’s going to have a heart attack at any given second.”
It’s the first time he’s voiced his worst fear, and I wish I could tell him that everything’s going to be okay, that he doesn’t need to worry, that life isn’t unpredictable and that things always turn out the way we want them to.
But I can’t say any of that with complete honesty, so I just say the one thing that I can truly assure him of.
“I’ll always be there for you, you know that, right?”
“I know, Shortcake. I couldn’t have done this without you, and I hope you know that. Now, getting back to this Nathan you’ve been talking about so much…”
Ah, Cole.
***
So I’m on board the flight not knowing if I’ll find Cole when I get there or not. We ended the call with him still unsure. He’d booked the flight, packed his bags, but he’d been strictly told by his parents not to come yet.
“If you twitch any more, I’m going to have them change my seat.”
I glare at Leila. “Sorry, I’m just nervous, okay?”
“You should be. I still can’t believe Amy let you come for this press trip. I don’t need your help; it’s not like you know something that I don’t.”
“I’m not here to help you, much as I would love the opportunity. I have my own assignments, and I’ll remember to check off, ‘not letting Leila get you down with her sad, sad thoughts’ from the list when I get to the hotel. Seriously, you need to start meditating or something. Your negativity is ruining my vibe.”
I put on my noise-canceling headphones and try to not strangle the girl next to me.
When we land, tottering after Amy and making sure none of her bags get left behind, we’re whisked away to a Four Seasons and checked into our rooms. It’s still early in the morning when we arrive, and I don’t have to work until later in the evening, so the three of us, equally exhausted, beeline for our rooms when given the keys.
“Remember, we have our first drinks and dinner with the team today, so I want you two dressed and ready to see me in the lobby by seven p.m. tonight. Got it?”
I almost salute her very much like Cadet Kelly but instead go for a simple nod.
“And, for the love of God, play nice. I don’t want the hotel staff waking me up from my nap to tell me that my two minions are misbehaving.”
“You won’t hear a peep from us.” Leila and I pretend to zip our mouths and watch in silence as Amy struts away, the bellboy following her with luggage that nearly tips over because of its weight.
“So…” I begin, “unfortunately, we’ve got rooms next to each other.”
“I’ll pretend you don’t exist if you do the same.” Leila destroys any attempts that I might make at trying to get along for the next six days.
“It’ll be like you’re staying next door to a silent film character, I promise,” I tell her and off we go, riding on two different elevators toward rooms that couldn’t be closer if they were twins in the womb.
***
I unpack my things and then try to sleep for a little bit. If I’ve read our itinerary correctly, then I’ll be on my feet all night, and I could use a good old power nap right about now. I turn my phone off, having told anyone who cares that I’ve arrived safely. My fingers hover over Cole’s name on my contact list, wondering if I should text, if not call, him. His flight’s supposed to take off any second, so I settle for a “Have a safe trip. I love you,” text and then I’m out.
The ringing of the hotel phone wakes me up. I’m terribly disorientated and struggle to place myself at first. When I’m finally able to recognize the familiar layout of the Four Seasons room, I get off my butt and reach for the phone, hoping my voice isn’t too groggy. I’m told by the reception desk that I have a call and they rattle off a number so quickly that I’m not able to even identify the caller.
Once I’m connected, it becomes apparent who it is. My other best friend and doctor-in-the-making, Megan Sharp, who lives and is going to med school in Maryland.
“You are the worst surprise giver ever!” she half screams, half shouts at me through the phone, and I pull it away from my ear.
“W-what did I do?” I’m still trying to clear the sleepiness from my head, and right now I’m a solid four on the scale of being awake. Looking at my watch, which I did not take off and which must have left a beautiful imprint on the side of my face, I realize that I sadly only got about two hours of sleep before being woken up by a screeching redhead.
“Why are you shouting at me? It’s too early for this.” I plop back into bed and my eyes begin to close on their own.
“Your boyfriend is looking for you and he’s worried out of his mind.”
“What?” This definitely makes me sit up.
“Alex just came home and told me that Cole was supposed to fly home today but he changed his mind. Instead, since he’d taken the time off anyway, he wanted to talk to you and ask whether he should just fly out to see you.”
“Oh.”
“Oh, right. Alex, I don’t know how, didn’t actually let it slip that you’re in Chicago there to surprise him. So a very lost, probably sad Cole is waiting at the airport, wondering if someone called Nathan has murdered his girlfriend.”
“My phone was turned off, I had no idea…”
“I think he’s headed home now, probably worried out of his mind. I don’t know how long he’s been trying to reach you but hey, you can probably put Operation Trench Coat into action now.” She laughs and despite the circumstances, I do too.
“It’s too cold out here for me to go out there dressed in nothing but a coat, okay?” I role my eyes, but even as I sit there and talk to Megan, I’m flooded with a sense of excitement.
Oh My God.
Six whole days with Cole!
Shoot, I don’t think I’ve packed anything remotely sexy.
“Tessa…hey, did I lose you already?”
“Megan, I think we have a problem.” I hit myself in the face with a
pillow.
“What?” She sounds concerned.
“I only brought granny panties with me this time!”
And the wicked witch laughs; she laughs for a long, long time.
***
The image of a desolate Cole makes me run around my hotel room like a crazy morning. It’s still around ten a.m. so I know I have quite some time before our event tonight. I can go, meet Cole, kiss all his pains away, and be back in time to throw on a little black dress and pretend that I’ve got my life together.
I’m shoving my legs into a pair of skinny jeans when there’s a knock on the door. I waddle toward the door, buttoning up the jeans. and look through the peephole to see a very disgruntled Leila.
“One minute,” I call out and change into a black, long-sleeved top. I’m donning an all-black outfit today in the hopes that it might come across as chic and not that I did not pack like I’m flying out to see the love of my life.
“I’m getting older by the minute, Tessa, stop wasting my time.”
Rolling my eyes, I make sure to saunter on my way back to the door. Throwing it open, I lean against the door and try to look like I’ve got better things to do and better people to see.
“How can I help you?”
She looks at me from head to toe, carefully taking everything in.
“Where are you off to?”
“Just going to see a friend.”
“We’re not here to socialize, we’re here to work. I came in here so that we could go over some last-minute details to make sure everything goes smoothly tonight and you don’t mess anything up.”
“What last-minute details? We went over everything back in the office. We could not be more prepared.”
She shrugs, a cruel smile forming on her face. “Amy’s orders, the brand’s just sent out some new press releases and we don’t have a lot of time to go over the material.”
Why do I get the feeling that she’s been sitting on this one for a while?
It’s because she has, and she can practically sense my eagerness to leave; it’s only making her more eager to imprison me.
I look longingly at the elevator behind her, then at my watch. I have to get out of here, but there’s no way that I can give Leila the satisfaction of proving to Amy that I’m the deadweight on the team.
