“I’ve waited this long. Of course I’ll wait.” Then I rubbed his neck. “No, really, you know I will. Of course.” I reached over to kiss him and then we walked back to the flat.
Brenna had left and written a note. “Behave. I’ll be in touch.”
She doesn’t know you the way I know you, if she thinks you’ll behave.
“Ha, ha, very funny. Will the cheekiness lessen now we’re really together?”
“Highly unlikely. Like you’d want it to, anyway.”
“No, that’s true. Wouldn’t want you any other way.”
We kissed languidly and I never wanted it to end. Much as kissing and fucking and making love was the greatest ever with him, that walk outside had been one of the best moments. “Now that you PDA’d the fuck out of me, as you say, care to just fuck me?”
“I thought you’d never ask,” he said and walked towards the bedroom.
The next few days were glorious. Bliss. Marshall was booked for another fashion show and asked me to come and watch.
“Really?” I asked. “Wow. Okay.”
“Yes, you can hang out with Antoni backstage beforehand. He loves you, you know.” He smiled. “And then watch in the front row.”
So before the fashion show, we had two days of utter bliss. Sex, walks with Jess, and just spending time together. I had brought some of my stuff over and would paint and sketch when Marshall checked work emails and made phone calls. We had slipped into almost perfect domestic bliss so easily. Almost too easily. I laughed out loud, waking up Jess.
“Hey, what’s so funny,” Marshall asked from his place at the kitchen island.
“Do you think Jamieson was right that day. We’re just destined to become an old homebody couple?”
He came over to me and rubbed my shoulders from behind. “Hey, where is this coming from? I’m the doubtful, insecure one in this couple.”
I turned, looking over to him. “I have loved these last couple of days, us just staying in and relaxing, but everyone else probably thinks it’s boring.”
He kissed me and then pulled me round to face him. “I … we don’t care about what anyone else thinks, okay. I’ve done that my whole life and look where that got me. And for the record, I have loved these last couple of days with the two of you and don’t want to go back to work.” Then he hugged me in tight.
* * *
At the fashion show, Antoni greeted me with a kiss on either cheek. “Darling. So good to see you again.” I couldn’t help but notice him take in Marshall and me holding hands. “So happy everything worked out with you guys. Marshall, I saw what your mother did to you. I’m so sorry, honey.”
“Thank you. Thank you. Take care of my man, okay? I’ll need to go to hair and makeup.” Marshall smiled at me and then went through to the other room.
“My boy, details, all the details.” I must have blushed, which was so unlike me, but I cleared my throat, and then he said, “That’s enough information for me. Glad you’re happy.”
“Happier than ever.” Just then Carter ran in, out of breath.
“Oh, hey, Stuart?” he said, his tone rising in confusion at seeing me there. “Antoni, is my outfit ready?”
“Yes, of course,” he replied and scuttled away.
“Here to see your man walk the runway? Wasn’t that a disaster with Marshall’s mum,” Carter said, turning to me.
“Yes, going to be quite an experience. And yeah, that was insane. Hey, everything okay with you and Jamieson?”
“What, did he say anything?” He shrugged his shoulders.
“No, I haven’t seen him since he’s been working. I was just curious.” Then before we could continue, there was a flurry of activity as Carter got whisked away.
Antoni brought me a glass of champagne and then sat beside me. “Well, you just sit and get to spectate. I have to do some running around. But I’ll take you out front with me in about an hour, okay?”
I raised my glass in a toast. “Of course. That sounds perfect to me.” I watched as everyone scurried around, and then I was following Antoni out to the seats at the side of the runway.
We sat down amongst people I didn’t recognize in front of a long runway. It was right at eye height so we’d see everything. The lights went down and I patted Antoni’s lap. “This is so exciting.”
Then various models started walking down the runway. They were all beautiful, but I only had eyes for one. In different outfits: from underwear to suits, they made their way down the far side and then directly in front of us. Marshall looked delectable and like absolute perfection. He had on only pyjama pants made of silk, I thought, slung low on his hips. His broad shoulders and amazing abs moved fluidly as he made his way down one side, turned at the top, and down the other.
To say I was mesmerized would be an understatement. I didn’t pay attention at all like Jamieson, to the magazines or fashion websites, but I couldn’t deny how spectacular he was. I was no expert, but Marshall was the best model there. You could tell he was the utmost professional. His walk was measured and he had a serious face.
Before too long, it was over and I felt my shoulders sag—not because of disappointment exactly—just that I’d got to witness him in his element and doing what his version of art was. Sure, he’d told me he hated some aspects of it, but you could tell why he was at the top of his game. To watch him like that was a sight to see.
Running backstage with Antoni, we waited for them to come out. Marshall appeared with a hoodie on and ran over to me, giving me a hug.
I smiled at him. “That was great. You are the best.”
“Why, thank you.” Then he whispered, “I’ll pretend you didn’t just say that because you’re my boyfriend.”
I laughed. I’d tell him later how amazing it was to watch him work.
* * *
The day of the interview arrived and Marshall had to go to a meeting at the modelling agency. He made it back with about an hour to spare, brushed past me, and jumped in the shower.
When he got out he was pacing the main room—even Jess seemed worried. He put his thumb to his lip and seemed more nervous than I’d seen him in days, weeks even.
“Ah, do I look okay?” I asked, trying to make him at ease. He barely looked over and mumbled it was fine. I got really worried then. If there was one thing about Marshall, with me anyway, was that he didn’t just brush off a conversation.
“Marshall, it’s me. Look at me.” Stopping him in his tracks, I made sure he was focusing on me. “Are you okay? We don’t have to do this. We can do it later or in some different way.”
Brenna would be there soon but I could easily phone her and get it all called off.
He sat down on the couch and didn’t even look at me. His breathing was coming out in short gasps. When I rubbed his shoulder, he just shook me off.
Crap, I hadn’t seen this coming, but I guess it really had been going too smoothly after all. I took a deep breath and sat across from him, reaching out to grab both his hands. Then I leaned over to kiss him gently. At first he resisted and didn’t react, and then he melted into me. I held him, not letting go, and then when we broke the kiss, I spoke.
“You are everything to me. And since the night of the party, the change in you, opening up and becoming the real you, I think has meant the most to you more than anything. So we don’t need to do anything else. Ever since I first met you, we had a connection, and as we moved forward, I’ve been with you every step of the way—no matter if they were small and slow steps, or bigger ones. So …”
Then I waited.
27
MARSHALL
The walls were closing in around me. Everything would be ruined, a disaster. It was only half an hour before the interview. I was having some sort of break down. Why was this happening. I wanted to tell the world my story, to be true to myself, but my brain was playing tricks on me.
I couldn’t break down. Not now. This wasn’t me. Stuart needed me to do this, no, I needed to do this for myself.
As I sat there, flashbacks of moments in my life flickered before me: getting into modelling, the rising fame—and then my unhappiness—all the hiding and pretending. And that’s when I knew I’d been happier than I ever had in my life since I found Stuart, and even happier since the night of the party. A huge weight had been lifted.
Then I stood up, pulling Stuart with me. “I’m good. More than good.” Reassuring him, and hugging him, I felt at home and grounded. Everything was right. “Just had thoughts of my past running through my head, and it all just sort of pummelled into me, you know?” I sighed and continued, “But then it fast forwarded to now. To how happy you make me.” A muffled woof came from below. “And you, Jess. Always you,” I said, laughing.
Looking around, I saw a new collage of pictures on the wall above the fireplace. “What, when?” I looked at Stu, tears in my eyes. There was a large framed photo of him with Jess, and then one that looked like a selfie of me and him, and another of me on the couch with Jess.
“Well, you know, you have no photos up and the camera crew from the magazine is coming, so I thought I’d surprise you. Do you, do you like it? I kinda just took over.”
“It’s just perfect. Thank you.” He smiled, which made me happy.
Then Brenna arrived and took us both in. “Looking fine boys, and wow, Marshall, I’ve never seen you smile so much in your life.”
I pulled Stu in closer. “All because of him.”
“Oh wow, I love the photos. Nice added touch. For this one, I’m letting you do the talking. You say what you want and feel comfortable with, okay? If they get to be too much, give me a sign or something and I can shut it down. I’ll stay to the side near the kitchen.” She walked around the flat, obviously checking that it all looked okay. “They’ll take a few photos of you, too, for the spread.”
I laughed. “Sure. I’ll be okay, really. This isn’t work. Well, I know it is, but it just feels different in some way. I’ve got this. Coffee, before we start?” I asked, walking to the coffee maker and feeling wonderful.
Soon the interviewer arrived with a camera crew in tow. Introductions were completed, and then Stu and I sat on the couch with Jess on his lap. I reached out to take his hand.
The interviewer was great and tried to stay away from the gossip and rumours of the party as best she could.
“How does it feel to have the world know you are a gay man?”
“I’m happy I can be my true self.” I looked at Stu. “Couldn’t have done it without him.”
“Do you think it will affect your modelling career?”
“If people are jerks and want to judge me negatively on that, I don’t want to work with them anyway.” Risking a glance over at Brenna, she gave me a smile and a thumbs up.
The rest of the interview went rather well. They took a few posed photos—of course, not a problem for me and told me when it would be released in the magazine. I smiled and thanked them all as they left.
“Wow,” Brenna said, “I was ready for damage control, or something close, but that was amazing. I’m so proud of you. I finally heard and saw the real you for the first time, along with the rest of the world, after all these years.” She came over to hug me.
“Yeah, I’m a work in progress, learning to open up, but thanks for always being there for me.”
“Stop, okay, I’m still one, too, getting used to this new you.”
I put my index finger to my lips. “Shhh, don’t let out my secret. Professionally, I’m the same. Well, not really, but you know what I mean.”
“Okay, right boss,” she said trying to hold back a smile. “I’m going to go, but I’ll see you in two days for the Los Angeles trip.”
“Two days? I thought it was the day after.”
“No. Remember I told you another one came up so I booked it? Don’t worry, you’ll like them.”
“Oh, right,” I rubbed my neck. “I guess I got distracted. Sounds good. Apart from having one less day here.”
“Oh, you’ll survive, loverboy. And Stuart, I’m truly looking forward to getting to know you better.”
“Me too,” he said. After she left, we were finally alone again. He pushed me against the door and said stay right there.
I didn’t dare move.
He scuttled away and petted Jess, then made sure she was tucked up in her bed in her room and came back to me. Before I knew what was going on, he’d undone my dress pants I’d put on for the photoshoot. “You are so sexy. I wanted you that whole time. The waiting was almost too much.” He pulled my hand and let me feel the hardness behind his tight jeans.
I massaged him, closing my eyes and leaning my head back. He kissed my neck then knelt down and finished undoing my pants. My erection sprung out.
“Oh. My. God. Commando. Fuck, that’s hot.” Then he continued his ministrations, licking me from root to tip, and then sucking me in deep. His thumb moved around to my ass, and it found its way into my hole just a little, and I squeezed around it.
The sensations were becoming too much, and since I was standing up, I almost felt that if my legs turned to jelly, I really would collapse. Placing my hands on either side of me against the door, I moved to plant my feet in a better place.
Stuart’s sucking and bobbing on my dick continued as I looked down at him. Moaning, he took me faster and faster. Slowly he pulled off and I gasped. “Fuck, how do you always do that? You always know.”
No answer, but he blew lightly on my cock, making me shiver. “C-coming. I’m gonna … Oh fuck.” Then he pushed in his whole thumb, wrapped his soft lips around me, and I poured into him, coming and coming, leaning back and squeezing around him as my orgasm took over. I grabbed his shoulders and started panting.
Stuart moved up and held me as I came down from the high. He kissed me and I could taste myself on his lips. I kissed him back passionately trying to catch my breath again. I felt shattered and glanced at him. “Now, your turn.”
He looked cheekily at me, smirking. “Where do you want me?”
I looked around. “Right where I am. Round two.” After leaving him sated and happy, we both got in the shower. After that, we went to get Jess and all cuddled on the couch. Eventually, we headed to bed.
I wasn’t sure what time it was when I woke up. There was a note from Stuart that he and Jess had gone to the park and he would sketch for a bit. I could go join them if I wanted. He’d just left the note half hour before and said he hadn’t wanted to wake me.
I pulled on some clothes, did fifty sit-ups and then jogged out the door. The paparazzi were nowhere to be found, or maybe taking a break. I couldn’t find it in my heart to care much. I felt freer than I ever had in my life. I stopped in at a little café and picked up two coffees and croissants. Following the path, I saw Stu and Jess off to the side on some seats at a ledge with a beautiful view of the skyline.
“Hey, handsome,” I said, sneaking behind the bench and sitting next to him. I handed him the coffee as he closed his sketch pad. “Missed you.”
“Me too. Thanks for this.” He took a sip. “Isn’t it a beautiful morning.”
“It is, can I see your sketch.” He opened the pad. The drawing was spectacular, showing the different nuances of the view. “Wow, that one is gorgeous.”
“Thanks.” He munched on a croissant. I snuck a bit to Jess and heard Stuart’s stomach growl. “Guess I needed this.”
I laughed. I’m not sure how long we stayed there, but there was no uncomfortable silence. It was reassuring and felt like home to me.
The two short days before I had to leave for work again seemed to pass in a flash. I was again saying goodbye to Stuart and Jess, and while I’d previously thought that filling in virtually every day with jobs was just the way to do it, I wanted to talk to Brenna about scaling it back on the flight.
“Bye, we’ll miss you,” Stuart said as they waved from the doorway.
I ran back up the stairs and kissed him. “Back soon. I promise.”
It was my first big job since all
the drama, and I wanted it to go smoothly. The magazine spread would be out in the UK tomorrow, but I wasn’t sure if it would reach over to here in the USA. I tapped my feet and then stretched out, trying to relax.
Brenna, bless her, tried to calm me. Before, we’d just about ignore each other and keep quiet, both with laptops out and doing our own work. “Hey, it’s gonna be okay. I promise.”
“Oh, I know. I just like to get myself in a state, don’t you know.”
“Well, that much is true.”
After a long morning, I got to call Stuart as I knew later he’d probably be sleeping. “Hey, baby. Yeah, it’s going okay. I want to be home with you guys.”
“Oh, I know, not long now. We … I want you here, too, but your job’s important. Now more than ever, you gotta show them how good you are, okay?”
He was right, I knew it. Much as I loved the distraction and I was happier than ever, I still had to focus on the job. “Thank you. You are so right. And the magazine is tomorrow. Are you, uh, getting a copy? I know you aren’t into that stuff like Jamieson.”
“What, are you kidding? First of all, I’m in it too. And second, of course. Can’t believe you even had to ask. You are crazy.”
“No argument there.” I laughed. “Okay, well tomorrow when I call, you gotta tell me how it turned out.”
“A thousand percent. You know it. Jamieson’s home tonight and though I’m still at your place, maybe I’ll go see him and then we’ll both go get it and admire.”
“Great plan.”
* * *
The next day I woke up early, worked out, and went to the warehouse where there’d be a photoshoot for a high-end t-shirt company called Jazz, who made high-quality, super soft, fitted shirts. I actually owned a few. There’d be some other male models, but I hadn’t met any of them before. I wasn’t sure where Carter was on location at just now.
I stood in front of a white tarp while someone shaved my chest and another played with my hair. Then I got spray tanned. We’d all have on tight denim jeans and white V-neck shirts. Mine literally fit to me like a second skin.
Marshall: Mayfair Model Series Page 20
