by Sarah Tobias
“I’m not evil.” I shook my head, stubbornly ignoring the laughter of the dark flame within me.
“Well, you sure are something. We can determine where you fall on the good versus evil scale later. Right now, we need to figure out your purpose.”
“Isn’t that the same thing?” I asked. “My purpose depends on whether I’m meant to be a savior or a killer.”
“It’s rarely as black and white as that. We need to start back at the beginning when you first experienced your changes. And most importantly, you need to tell me everything.”
I nodded, but slumped in defeat. I was grateful that there was someone, even if it had to be an evil fae, that I could finally tell everything to. I was tired of hiding, of carrying this poisonous secret inside me and struggling to stay afloat.
I began by telling him about the first fae, who’d hidden in Macy’s boyfriend. While Derek had already heard the details of this Melix, he hadn't heard the story of me.
I spoke of the mysterious cold sweat that came over me, the sense of panic and survival washing over as soon as Rob touched me, and how I felt the burn for the first time.
“Strange,” Derek said after a moment of heavy thought. “There had to be a trigger of sorts. Something must have caused these symptoms, especially after nineteen years of being an insignificant—but yummy—human,” he said. “Let’s file that possibility away for now. Continue.”
I explained about the second fae encounter, though he knew most of that since he’d come across me seconds after I finished her off. I spoke fast, noticing the boredom as his eyelids lowered shut. If fae could have concentration issues, Derek was a prime candidate.
“So, then I came across a giant, gross, brown blob with fangs and tentacles,” I said, and Derek jerked awake.
I left out that I’d saved Gwyn. A part of me wanted to keep Gwyn and Asher a secret until I knew more about them. They actually saved my butt, unlike other, wimpy fae deserters.
“That’s interesting.” Derek said. “You caught yourself one of the mid-level fae. A Bogmar. I bet it put up a fight,” he said.
“It did,” I agreed. Being trapped in the slimy, wet, sucking mass wasn’t too enjoyable, either. “But here’s the weird part. There was no human shell. It was just … the thing itself.”
Derek’s brows lowered. “Out in the open? Are you sure about that?”
“Pretty sure. Unless it completely morphed inside of the human and absorbed it or something.”
“No, that’s not how we do things,” Derek answered, his voice tight. “When we’ve transitioned into a human, we become an essence of sorts. Well actually, we’re the blue smoke that you lap up with your tongue so delightedly.” He stared at me for a few seconds longer, as if still processing what he’d witnessed, before continuing. “When we need to defend ourselves, we use the human body to form certain aspects of our original selves. Fangs, for example. Another trait would be the weapons of defense our bodies possess, which we can push through the human’s skin.”
“Gross,” I said, remembering the disgusting nose-spear.
“Your opinion aside,” he continued, “We only form as much as we can without breaking through our human shell entirely. We never, ever, form our true selves while inhabiting a human unless absolutely necessary. That would kill the human body, tearing it to shreds, rendering it useless. It’s a lot of work to find another shell, you know. Not every one you inhabit takes.”
“Okay, but you’re saying it’s still possible. This blob—or Bogmar as you call it—could have burst through the human?”
“I suppose. Did you see any shreds of skin anywhere?”
I thought back, containing the grimace of disgust at the thought of skin flaps floating around. All I could recall was slime, gook, and tentacles. No human remnants.
“No. I don’t think I did,” I answered.
“In that case, there can only be one reason that fae was wandering around this world in its true form,” Derek said, the skin around his eyes wrinkling with tension.
“Care to fill me in?” I asked.
“You already know the answer, babycakes.” He stood, avoiding the scattered debris with ease as he came closer.
Derek paused, leveling his gaze with mine. “The Hunter is getting closer to you.”
Chapter 33
Even with my superhuman hearing, I had trouble catching Derek’s whisper.
“The Hunter what? You really need to explain these epiphanies of yours, Derek. It’s impossible to predict where your brain goes.”
“Excuse me for enjoying a little dramatic flare in my life,” Derek replied, stepping over the basketball stand as he took a seat on the floor in front of me. “The Hunter is the only one who can expel a fae from its human shell. He has quite the goody-two-shoes style. Save the human, destroy the fae, blah blah, gag me with a spoon.”
I pressed my lips together at this revelation. An image of Gwyn writhing on the ground, wrapped in gooey tentacles, flashed through my mind.
If she’s the Hunter, then I’m turning into a cupcake.
Yet, I had to concede that despite my lack of fluffy feelings towards her, I didn’t want to mention her to Derek. I remembered my promise to myself: protect humans, all humans. Even the jerk ones.
“Consider yourself lucky the Hunter didn’t spot you,” he added.
“I sensed nothing,” I said. “No warning, zilch. Why would the Hunter just expel a fae and leave?”
“That I have no answer for. There are a lot of fae breeds here in this city. Perhaps the Hunter was otherwise occupied and thought to come back to the Bogmar later. They don’t move quick, you see, unless in water. As you probably noticed, they have no feet.”
“That seems careless of the Hunter.”
“Not necessarily. You were around here, correct? Not a human soul in sight. It would probably take the Bogmar at least an hour to clear the shipyard. There really is no other explanation, Emily. No one else can expel a fae.”
I hesitated, biting my lip. “Well…”
Derek glanced up sharply. “Spill it.”
“This morning, I might’ve, you know … expelled a fae out of a human body.”
“What?” Derek jumped up, clutching his chest like I was going to just reach in and pry him out. “You didn’t think to make that the first thing to tell me?”
“Relax, Derek. I don’t even know how I did it. It was in a child. I was fighting to save her, and this pressure built, and I just pushed at it with my mind, releasing it, and this white ripple in the air crashed into the little girl. It blasted into her body, and ... cast out the fae’s soul. And then that soul formed into this small, decaying thing. I didn’t expect it to become tangible and almost kill me.”
I said this all in a rush, having to gulp in air once I finished.
Derek paused in his retreat, lifting a hand to waggle a finger like an exasperated teacher disciplining his most troublesome pupil. “I have a few problems with this. You created a ripple effect in the air with your mind, forcing a fae out of a human shell? You didn’t use a weapon? Nothing?”
I shook my head, but Derek didn’t seem to notice as he ranted. “Even that sociopathic Hunter has a weapon. And you’re also telling me you came face-to-face with a Leiche?” His tongue rolled over the strange name, his tongue dipping down to his lower teeth at the “c” and pronouncing it Lay-he. “That breed is one of the deadliest, and very, very high in the ranks. They’re the only ones left known to prefer children as their shells. They are disgusting, rancid little hobbits, but still hold a lot of power. And wait.” Derek stilled. “There’s a thing inside of you? A fae? Are you fighting with another fae inside of you?”
Derek’s voice rose higher the longer he ranted and raved.
“What do you mean the Hunter has a weapon?” I asked instead of answering.
“You answer me first,” he said, hands now on his hips.
After a brief stare-down where neither of us blinked, I relented, reminded that
I needed information more than I wanted to win a who-can-be-more-obstinate contest.
“I’ve been fighting what I can only describe as a darkness inside of me. A dark flame,” I said. “Like thick, black smoke, curling around … it feels like a—like something’s floating, inside me, especially when there’s fae around. She begs me to kill, to consume the blue mist. And it's only when I let her take over that I … transform.”
Derek stared at me, his complexion draining further with every word.
“This is really beyond my expertize,” Derek finally managed. “I think you might be the deadliest creature I have ever come across. And what’s worse, you can’t control it.”
“She’s getting stronger. I can feel her, waiting for her chance to take me over for good,” I said, fear mixing in with the confession. “Derek, what if … what if I’m the Hunter?”
“That would be very unfortunate.” He settled onto his haunches, pondering the gymnasium floor. “But I told you I could sense when the Hunter was near. It’s this feeling—hard to explain. I don’t get that with you. Not at all. You can’t be the Hunter.” He looked up to the ceiling. “You can’t be.”
I never thought I could worry a fae, but Derek very much freaked out every time he learned more about me. What kind of fae was he, anyway? Why did he come back for me?
I let both of us sit in silence for a while, sorting through our thoughts, until an idea struck. “Derek, can Hunters evolve? Become more powerful? Different? Maybe I’m, I don't know, a Hunter two-point-oh.”
“Good lord, I hope not.” He shook his head. “I will do everything I can to figure out what you are. We need to stop you, before this turns into something neither you or I can handle.”
“Yes, please stop me,” I said. “Get her out of me.”
Derek’s motives for helping could be for his own self-centered reasons, but I was past the point of suspicion. I had my own selfish motives for wanting this to end. Even if I could be the Hunter, the one to rid fae from this world, I just wanted her gone. The suffering had to stop.
“The Hunter uses a weapon,” Derek continued, answers being the only form of comfort he could give. “I’ve never seen it myself, thankfully. But I’ve heard talk of it.” He shrugged. “That’s the only description I have.”
“Wonderful.” I sighed, wiping the dampness from my eyes. I stood up.
“Where are you going?” he asked. “We have much more to discuss. Like the fact that you now have a problem.”
“No more debates. We need to take action,” I said over my shoulder. “And what’s one more problem on top of the thousands of others that are piling up?”
“Consider this to be a major issue to put first on that list,” he said, his voice sharp. “The Leiches don’t work by themselves. They’re not isolated creatures.”
“And?” I finally paused and turned around.
“There are four of them. Well, three now. And the others will know one of their brethren was killed. They’ll come for you.”
“Let them,” I said with weary conviction. “You just informed me I’m the deadliest creature you’ve ever encountered.”
Derek shook his head. “Babycakes, that right there is what could kill you. Don’t be so arrogant in the face of so much you don’t know. One Leiche nearly killed you. What do you think three of them at once will do?”
A shiver of fear laced down my spine, but I refused to show it. “I’ll be ready for the Leiche.” Then I said, so quietly he didn’t catch it, “They know what I am.”
I slammed my mouth shut, glad he didn’t hear me. Derek wasn’t allowed to get to them first.
“I hope you’re ready, I really do,” he said. “And it’s Leiches if you’re talking about more than one. I’m no teacher if I can’t tell you how to correctly pronounce a fae Sect.” He studied me long and hard before adding, “Let’s see what you got. Figure out where this ‘darkness’ of yours takes you. I dare you.”
I raised my brows. Never, in my entire life, was I able to turn down a dare.
“Yes, yes, I realize you might kill me,” Derek said, “but I’m hoping that instead of doing so, you’ll take this as an opportunity to hone—”
I slammed him into the far wall, holding onto his neck but making sure I bunched his shirt collar in my hand so I could leave his skin untouched.
“Okay,” he said, his voice tight and garbled as he raised his hands up. “Point made.”
“It’s best not to piss my dark flame off.”
I slackened my grip, enough for him to take advantage of my distraction and snatch my shoulders. He dug deep, but he was smart enough to stop before he punctured my shirt and touched my skin. He lifted me up and flipped me above him and into the very wall he’d slammed into.
My back cracked into the concrete before I landed, my left shoulder breaking ground before my body followed. I was all too aware that I resembled an upside-down rag doll, but I didn’t acknowledge that embarrassment as I flipped into a standing position and prepared for his next onslaught.
Derek was nowhere to be found.
I glanced side-to-side, up and down, but my sharpened vision couldn’t make him out through the casting shadows of the sun filtering through the dusty windows. The only sound I heard was the distant hum of traffic, cars honking, truck engines sighing. Faint laughter floated through the windows with the traffic, the sounds blending into the classic thrum of the city, but no pitter-patter of Derek feet.
I closed my eyes. I would have to access that deeper part of me to locate him. The dark flame blazed as I touched upon her.
Where is he? I asked her.
The heat of him pulsed above, spurting and quivering like a low fire in a warm brick hearth. I looked up in time to see him leap from a beam and fall on top of me, sending us both skidding across the ground.
Derek had me on my back, his face close to mine. I shouldn’t be shocked at his changed appearance, but I couldn’t help it. The bumbling, spectacled Derek was gone, and in his place was a pulsating, angry beast. His eyes slanted upwards, higher than a cat’s, and glowed a dark scarlet, his muscles straining under real-Derek’s skin. His brows protruded, creating a raised ridge across his forehead that sloped down at the center towards his nose, shadowing the lids of his eyes and creating a permanent, fuming scowl. Another ridge formed out of his skull, the smooth surface of his forehead rising at the top of his hairline and sloping into a line down the center, joining his nose and dividing his face into two halves. His mouth remained the same size, but as he inhaled he revealed his teeth, his gums rimmed with sharp, tiny incisors.
“Come on, you’re not done yet, babycakes.” Derek laughed deeply, the sound of his strange new voice rumbling in his chest.
My dark flame demanded to be free to consume this delectable snack that had literally landed on top of us. I ignored her, knowing full well that this training was essential. I needed Derek’s power and knowledge, not his soul.
I struggled to free my arms, but Derek held them against the ground, impervious at my attempts to break free. His heat seeped through my clothing, the vividness of his fae pulsing so close.
I wanted it. Oh, I wanted it.
“Not as strong as you think, huh?” He laughed again.
I sneered at Derek’s taunts, and I allowed the flame to bask behind my eyes.
“Not going to work, I’m afraid.” Derek almost sounded normal despite his malformed face and throaty voice. “I’m not looking into those deadly rays of yours.”
My struggles were in vain—Derek was too strong and had prevented me from using my greatest weapon: the burning.
And so I did the next best thing: I head-butted him.
Turned out, he was sensitive between the eyes. As soon as my head cracked against his, he swore and rolled off. My forehead seared with the contact, throbbing from a combination of connecting with the sharp ridges and his skin.
“It burns!” he screamed, writhing around on the floor.
“Derek? Crap �
� what have I done now?” I shook off my pounding headache and crawled over, turning him onto his back to see what kind of damage I’d inflicted.
Derek lowered his hands from his monstrous face, smiling.
He caught me by the arm, yanking me beside him until he was once again on top, his forearm pressed against my neck and his mouth inches from my own.
“Dead,” he whispered.
Chapter 34
I snarled as Derek’s face retracted into his human features.
“If I hadn’t been holding myself back from doing what I truly can do,” I spat, “you’d be the dead one.”
“Then why didn’t you?” Derek asked, removing his forearm from my neck and rising.
“Because I didn’t want to kill you.” I said, smacking my palms on the scuffed floor and sitting up.
“Ah, and there we have it. Your weakness. You’re not so indestructible, after all,” he said.
I frowned, my fingers curling into fists.
“You care.” Derek combed a hand through his thick hair, attempting unsuccessfully to tame it back into place. “The human in you is stronger than you thought. Unfortunately.”
I pulled myself up into a stand, wincing when my muscles protested at the movement. “I’ll be able to handle the Leiches. And anything else that comes at me.”
“Well, I really hope that’s the case,” he said, picking his glasses up off the floor and placing them crookedly on his nose. “Because as frightening of a nightmare that you are, you’re starting to grow on me.”
I growled at him before stomping to the exit, leaving his annoying, spectacled face behind.
* * *
I spent the rest of the afternoon at home, trying unsuccessfully to find tranquility and soothe my scrambled nerves. A hot shower didn’t work. I stood under the warm, fragrant water stiff as a tuning fork, the tendons in my neck practically forcing themselves through my skin. A mere two minutes after entering, I sprang out, drying myself furiously with a towel and pulling a royal blue long-sleeve shirt over my head and donning a pair of jeans. I paced around my tiny apartment, thoughts and makeshift plans jumbling around in my head.
