by Scott, S. L.
He eats his breakfast and I watch when he’s not looking. His strong jaw, his shorter hair that seems to work just as well as his longer locks did, and his muscles. Watching them alternate and work so fluidly, another thing I remember being so fascinated by the first time I ever rode with him in his Maserati.
“I’ll see you in three weeks?” he asks.
“Three weeks,” I repeat, nodding. The thought depresses me.
“We just did over three months. It’ll be okay. It’s only three weeks.”
“It’s too long.” I reach across the table, rubbing my fingertips over the top of his hand. “Definitely too long.”
“After this, never again, baby,” he says, sensing I need the reassurance.
“I like that sound of that.”
“I like the sound of forever.”
“Surferboy, you’re getting soft on me.”
“That’s where you’re wrong. I’m never soft on you, around you, near you.”
We both laugh, but I stop so I can hear his laughter without mine obscuring it.
“What?” he asks, smiling at me.
“Your laugh. I haven’t heard you laugh like that in a long time.” I nod, grinning at how sentimental I’ve gotten. “Lately, everything seems to remind me of when we first met. I’m feeling nostalgic, I guess.”
“You remember my laugh from back then?”
“I can never forget it. I thought it was so genuine, unlike you at the time.”
“Hey,” he says with pouty lips. “Don’t pick on me.”
“Not picking, just sharing. There was such an honesty to your laugh that it sounded as if it was reserved for only the most special moments in life.” His cheeks tinge just barely, but I catch it. When he looks down with a small smile gracing his face, I ask, “Does that embarrass you?”
“Not embarrassed, just flattered that you would remember something like that. This weekend was a good reminder of all the things we’ve been missing since we’ve been apart.”
I walk around to his side of the booth and slide in next to him, bumping into him with my hip. Leaning my head on his shoulder, our fingers entwine on the table in front of us. “Yes, it has.”
He kisses me on the top of my head and tosses some bills on the table to cover the meal. “We need to get going.”
“Don’t make me go.” I pretend to resist, but he’s right. We do need to leave.
“We promised.”
“I know, but I just want more time with you.”
“Three weeks, baby.”
“Three weeks.”
* * *
“Hey, Evan?”
“Yes, Mallory?”
I tap him playfully on the shoulder. “Don’t mock me, mister.”
He looks over, laughing, and says, “Okay. What is it, oh love of my life, Soon-to-be-Wife?”
I roll my eyes and giggle. “You’re ridiculous, you know that?”
“I’ve been called many things, I can’t say ridiculous has been one of them.”
“There’s a first time for everything.”
“Yep, there sure is.”
I start swinging our clasped hands between us, and ask, “This is all real, right? I didn’t dream up this whole weekend, did I? Ow!” My hand flies to rub my ass where he just pinched me.
“Nope.” A sly grin slides across his face. “See, you’re totally awake.”
“Ass.”
“I can make it all better,” he says, rubbing my ass with his hand.
“You’re in a silly mood.”
“Haven’t you heard? I’m getting married.”
“Awww, I love ya, babe.”
He kisses me on the nose then taps it. “I love you, too.”
We start walking again, but I stop him this time. “I’m nervous.”
Evan tilts his head in understanding, then pulls me closer. “Don’t be. I’m right here with you.”
Turning a corner, I see a park and ask, “Do we have time to go in?”
Checking his watch, he says, “A few minutes.”
After finding a dry spot in the grass, we sit, eventually lying down, staring up at the sky and cuddling.
While stroking my arm, he asks, “Do you trust her? Do you think my mother meant what she said?”
His body feels tense while waits for me to answer. I say, “I want to trust her. I think we should, but I’m nervous.”
“I told her how I felt about you last week.” I look up at him when he pauses, watching him close his eyes. “I want to believe she’s being sincere. Her organizing this trip, flying you out here, backs what she said about making amends, but I wanted your take on it.”
I laugh—it’s light, but an amusing thought that makes me giggle. “I don’t think we’re going to be besties or anything, but I do think she’s taken the first step to fixing her relationship with both of us.” I watch a white, puffy cloud float by that seems more fitting for a Hawaiian sky in June than a Manhattan skyline in December. “How do you think she’ll react to our engagement?”
He sits up on his elbows and looks down at me. “It’s happening, so it doesn’t matter what she thinks. Anyway, we have a little time. I still think your dad’s blessing needs to come first.”
“I’m cold,” I say, sitting up. “Let’s go. They’ll be expecting us soon and I need time to freshen up.”
* * *
“Evan! This must be your Mallory. So nice to meet you. I’m Helga, the Ashford’s House Keeper.”
I take her hand. “It’s very nice to meet you, too.”
“Let me take you back. Your sister and friends are in the dining room already.” She leads us through the large apartment and I steal glances around the place trying to imagine Evan as a boy growing up in such a pristine and expensive looking home. Helga continues talking, “I don’t know what the kids did all weekend, but they said they were famished and keep asking when dinner is being served.”
Mine and Evan’s eyes connect and we laugh, knowing exactly why everyone is starving. When I blush, Evan smiles, and sends a wink my way.
“Miss Mallory Wray and Mr. Evan Ashford,” Helga announces to the gathered group in the large and very formal dining room. Holy shit! Did she just announce our arrival? I look at Evan shocked by the formality. He just rolls his eyes.
“Nice, baby bro. You actually made Helga announce you?” Kate says sarcastically. “That’s quite the ego you got there. Are you showing off for Mallory?”
“Calm the fuck down, Kate. I forgot she was going to do that. You’re such a hard ass these days.”
“Hey brah, she’s always had a hard ass,” Murphy adds with a proud smile and a nod.
“Gross! Not cool man,” Evan says, making gagging noises before he turns to Helga. “Sorry about that. I forgot about the ‘protocol’ of the house. You know you never have to announce me.”
“I know you don’t care, but your mother likes the tradition,” she replies with a shrug, winning me over completely.
Evan nods.
“C’mon over here, Evan.” Kate stands up and hugs him. “Since you’re going to be leaving soon, promise me we can hang out and I’ll promise no work talk.”
“We will. Don’t worry. And I’ll be here for Christmas now. Will you?”
“You are?” she replies surprised and steals a glance in my direction.
“I’ll explain later,” he says, “but yes. So if you’re here, we’ll have some down time then.”
They continue talking as I walk over to Sunny and we hug. “Hey,” she says, “you guys seem to have disappeared the whole weekend. I don’t blame you though. Guess the surprise worked?”
“More than you know.”
“Zach said he walked in on you two ‘reuniting.’” She giggles while doing air quotes.
I can feel my face heat. “Yeah, he did. I would normally want to die over that, but I was too distracted to care.”
“All is good?” She looks into my eyes, like the true friend she is waiting for my honest answer.
I take her hand and lean toward her ear and whisper, “It’s just been perfect. A dream come true and more than I could’ve wished for.”
We hug again, and she says, “I’m happy for you. Zach told me how hard it’s been on Evan being here in New York. Sarah’s kept me posted on you when you wouldn’t talk about it. You’re quite the pair. You two are made for each other.”
Watching Evan joke with his friends and sister, it all feels so real now. He’s mine and I’m his. Forever. “In three weeks we’ll be together for good.”
“Three weeks and Evan’s going to Denver?” She laughs. “I think he’ll go into culture shock.”
“Ha ha. He had a good time when he visited. Well, for the most part.” No need to drag the whole Ryan-Will mess up again. “Anyway, we’re only staying in Denver for a few days and then he’s going to head to school and get his place set up.”
“Mr. and Mrs. Hugh Ashford,” Helga announces, drawing our attention to the large arched doorway.
Claire walks straight to Kate and Murphy and hugs them as Hugh follows behind, hugging or shaking hands when appropriate. They move to Evan where I watch as she smiles lovingly at him, then embraces him as if she’ll never get the chance again. Her gaze lands on me as she whispers a secret to him.
She approaches me and Sunny a little more cautiously. “Sunny, Zach, thank you for joining us.”
“Thank you for having us, Mrs. Ashford,” Sunny replies with a handshake.
“Mallory.” His mother smiles, seeming to seek an assurance as she approaches.
“Hello, Mrs. Ashford.”
“Claire, please.”
“Of course. Thank you for inviting me, Claire.” The name doesn’t feel natural to me when I say it.
She smiles in relief. “I’m so glad you could make it. I know you have a flight this afternoon and probably want to spend that time with Evan, so thank you for joining us.” She takes my hand and does a little squeeze before walking back to the buffet. “Come, let’s eat. I’m sure you kids have lots of plans for the day.”
Hugh greets me and says, “Mallory, I know you haven’t had the easiest time since dating Evan.” He stops and looks down as if he’s screwing this all up. “I guess I should clarify. I know you haven’t been given an easy time by my family and I hope you accept my sincerest apologies. I hear that a bridge is being built and I appreciate that you would consider giving us a second chance.”
“Evan is worth it, and yes, a bridge has now been built.”
Hugh takes my hand between both of his, and says, “I wanted to take this opportunity to thank you for giving Evan direction. He needs a strong support system with all the changes in his life and I think you’re one of the strongest people I’ve met. You’re a great match for our son.”
“Thank you, sir.”
“Please call me Hugh.”
“Thank you, Hugh.”
“You’re welcome. Now,” he says, clasping his hands together. “Shall we?”
“Yes. It looks wonderful,” I say, referring to the spread.
Lunch is pleasantly polite. It’s funny to see all of us together in such a formal setting when the last time we were together was on the island in cut-offs and swimsuits. We get teased for sneaking out of the gala early, but even Claire smiles when Evan confesses he wanted me all to himself. She then went on to say how she and Hugh used to sneak out of the galas they were forced to go to when they were in their twenties.
I’m liking this new Claire.
The Ashford’s walk us to the door and Claire takes me by the elbow. When I turn, she hugs me. “I hope we’ll see you soon, Mallory. I’d like to get to know you better.”
I’m taken aback again by her touching words, but trapped in the somewhat awkward embrace. “Thank you. I’d like that, too.” I’m undecided if that is the complete truth, but it feels like it right now.
She releases me with a smile, and Hugh says, “Good luck with your studies and have a safe flight.”
“Thank you.” We say our goodbyes, leaving only enough time to grab my suitcase and head to the airport.
My personal goodbye to Evan is tear-filled, but I manage to hold them back from falling. All the heavy emotions of our goodbye back in Hawaii a distant relative to today’s pain. Today my heart can handle this goodbye because even though it’s never easy leaving him or him leaving me, this time is different. This time I know that once we’re reunited, we won’t be separated again.
Leaving the dream world behind, I get back to reality and open my textbook on the plane, setting it on the tray in front of me, and start preparing for my finals.
73
Mallory
I scan down the group names until I find ours and scroll across to see the grade: A.
Stepping away from the door and out from the crowd of students, I make my way to a nearby bench. I close my eyes, enjoying the fact that I made straight A’s despite the emotional roller coaster I’ve been on this semester.
A cleared throat and someone saying, “Congratulations,” grabs my attention.
My eyes pop open though I know who it is already—Ryan. “Congratulations,” I reply to be polite. Gathering my backpack, I swing it over my shoulder as I stand up to leave, my short moment of satisfaction ruined.
“Mallory, please,” Ryan says to my back, a distinctive plea to his tone.
I turn around, and exhale, exhausted by everything to do with him: Will, the project, his attentions. “Please what, Ryan? What do you want from me?”
“Can I apologize?” He doesn’t wait for a response and I wasn’t going to give him one anyway. “I was an ass. You were upfront about your boyfriend all along and uh, I don’t know.” He runs his hand through his hair, once again reminding me of Evan. “I’m sorry. Look, I didn’t mean to be such a dick. It’s just the whole long distance thing didn’t work for me and I figured it wouldn’t work for you.”
“Because you don’t know us.”
“You’re right. I got to know you though and I liked you. Simple as that. I wanted to be the one to pick you up when you were feeling down—”
“You mean when I was dumped?”
He shrugs. “Yeah, something like that.”
“Well, I wasn’t dumped. Actually, we’re better than ever.” I refuse to have Ryan be the first person I share my engagement with, even if I am feeling defensive.
“I’m glad to hear it. I’m glad you’re happy.”
“I don’t think you’re a bad guy, but you need stop all of this. You need to move on.”
“I can appreciate what you’re saying, but if—”
“There are no if’s for us. There will never be an ‘us’ at all.” I look down the hall, feeling bad, but I won’t prove Evan right and be the one to fuck us up trying to spare Ryan’s feelings. Evan comes first. “We can’t be friends either. I’m just not the girl for you, but hope you find someone special.” I turn around and walk away.
It’s over, even before he says, “I’m sorry, Mallory.”
That afternoon, I load up the trunk of the car with suitcases and hop in the driver’s seat ready to head to my parent’s house for Christmas break. When I turn the key to start the car, nothing happens, nothing but a few engine clicks. That doesn’t sound good.
“C’mooonnn, you can do it. C’mon. I’ll get you a nice oil change when we get home if you just run for me now. I promise,” I say, stroking the dashboard.
Closing my eyes, I scrunch my face up as I turn the key again. Nothing happens, not even the clicking this time. “Shit!” I yell, hitting the steering wheel.
Two hours later, Sarah pulls into my parent’s driveway and my dad rushes out to help while I hug Sarah goodbye. “Thanks for the ride.”
My dad grabs the suitcase and two other bags I brought home, including one full of dirty laundry. “I’ll head up after the holiday and work on the car.”
“Thanks, Dad.”
Sarah hops back into the driver’s seat, and says, “Let’s get tog
ether while we’re home, okay? Sunny said she’ll be back on Friday.”
Leaning in through the passenger door, I reply, “Yeah, for sure. And Merry Christmas.”
“You too, Mal.”
I settle into my girlie little bedroom, attempting to keep my stuff organized, but it’s tough. I’ve outgrown the room in more ways than one.
On Christmas morning, I watch my parents open the last of their gifts and sit back to enjoy our time together. Evan was right, because being here this time is different. I’m not a child anymore and my relationship with my parents has changed. I’m trying to appreciate every moment because our lives are about to change, but I’m still the only one privy to those changes.
The day after Christmas, a car comes squealing into the driveway making me jump. I run to the door to look and find Sunny and Zach running toward the house, trying to avoid the light rain that I know will turn the snow into muddy slush later.
I throw the door wide open and tackle her with a hug that almost knocks her over.
“Geez, Mallory, it’s only been two weeks,” she says, with a loud laugh. “I appreciate the love though.”
“I know, but we didn’t get much time together in New York and—”
“Been kind of bored, huh?” she asks, winking, knowing me too well.
“It hasn’t been too bad. Hey, Zach,” I say, giving him a hug.
“Hey there, Mal,” he says. “You doing okay?”
“I’m good.” I shrug. “Come inside.”
I introduce Zach to my parents and Sunny hugs both of them immediately making herself at home like she always does. They consider her the other daughter they never had.
We hang out for a while, catching up on the latest gossip, before making plans to meet later for a night out.
By nine that night, Sunny, Zach, and I walk into Main Street Bar and Grill. Sarah and Josh are already there saving a table in the corner.
We order a few pitchers, grab extra chairs for all of us to squeeze around the table, and chat. Zach fits right into the mix since he’s his usual friendly self and Sarah tells them about Ryan and Will ‘wanting’ me and how the project turned out. It’s all still too fresh, my emotions twisted by the memories of the trouble it caused.
