by Liwen Y. Ho
Colin, this is Mrs. Connelly. Please give me a call when you’re free.
What was God doing now? Taking a seat behind the wheel, he dialed Candy’s mom’s number and waited expectantly for her to pick up.
Chapter Sixteen
Candy
If Candy had thought she was an emotional wreck a week ago, she was disillusioned. Because the woman staring back at her in the vanity mirror was a perfect reflection of how weary, drained, and depressed she felt. Her bloodshot eyes blinked slowly, surrounded by dark circles underneath. Her nose and cheeks were patchy and red from crying. The bruising along her cheek cast a pale yellow color to her complexion. And the wound above her mouth was now a dark red line stretching from the center of her cupid’s bow to the side of her nose.
It was not a pretty sight. At all. Which was why Candy had been locked up in her condo every day. Thanks to modern conveniences, she didn’t have to go out at all. She had her groceries delivered to her front door, along with any other purchases she made online. Her freelance job allowed her to work from home. She’d only ventured out to get her stitches removed yesterday then snuck back home to hide behind her drawn shades. If she could stay here forever, she would. Except that she had agreed to show up for the TV gig tomorrow.
Her hand went up to her chest out of habit, searching for the necklace she often clutched when she felt lost. When she only grasped the fleece fabric of her pajama top, her stomach sank. She still couldn’t believe she’d lost her locket that day at the beach. For all she knew, it was sitting on the bottom of the Pacific Ocean by now. As much as she hated how she looked at the moment, it was nothing compared to losing her sister’s last gift to her. The loss weighed heavily on her heart, adding to her growing hopelessness.
Her phone rang, causing her to sigh. As predicted, her mom was calling her again for the third time that day. To say she was worried was an understatement. She could hear the concern in her mom’s voice as soon as she answered.
“Candy, sweetheart, how are you feeling?”
“Mom, I’m feeling the same as I did an hour ago when you called.”
“Oh, well, that’s a good thing.” She paused. “I was wondering if you’d be coming over for dinner tonight? It’s Tuesday, as you know.”
Candy sighed. She felt bad already for missing last week’s meal, but she really wasn’t in any mood to see people. Or to have people see her. “I don’t think so, Mom. I’ve got lots of work to catch up on, reviews to write. Anyway, I’m still in my PJs.”
“Candace Connelly, your father and I don’t care what you look like. You can come in a sack if you want to. I just want to see your beautiful face. It’s been too long.”
She winced. “That’s the thing, Mom. I just got my stitches out, and it doesn’t look good. I don’t look good.” She huffed, hating how petty she sounded, but it was the truth. “I know I sound horribly vain, but I’m not ready to go out. Maybe next week.”
“Next week? Honey, you’ve been cooped up long enough. What’s going on? It can’t be as bad as the time you broke out in hives before Junior Prom. You said it was just a cut.”
“But it’s right over my mouth where everyone can see it. At least for the hives, I could take something to make it go away. But this—” she stared at her reflection “—this isn’t going away anytime soon. And I have that TV show tomorrow. Everyone will see it and be talking about it.”
Mrs. Connelly sighed. “Candy, I’m sorry you feel so helpless. Why don’t you come on over and we’ll figure something out. Maybe if we put some aloe on it, it’ll help speed up the healing. Or we can cover it with some makeup.”
Candy glanced down at all the small bottles and compacts full of liquid and powder foundation that she had been trying on right before her mom called. None of them, not even the most expensive products, had done their job of covering up the wound. “I’ve tried, Mom. Nothing works.”
A long silence came over the line before her mom spoke up again. “Candy, you know it’s what’s inside that counts. People may care about appearances, but God looks at our hearts. That’s all that matters. Your sister used to say that all the time after she lost her hair.”
She shut her eyes. As much as she appreciated her mom’s pep talk, the words did nothing to drive away her insecurities. Especially the mention of her younger sister who had fought so valiantly and been so brave in the face of cancer. Mandy had been incredibly mature for her young age and so accepting of her circumstances. She had truly experienced a peace that surpassed all understanding, as the Bible promised those who didn’t worry but went to the Lord in prayer. Candy had yet to grasp even an ounce of that serenity. How could she when she tried so hard to control every little detail?
Thinking of her sister’s short but fulfilling life filled her with longing. Oh, how she missed Mandy’s optimism and enduring faith. “I miss her so much, Mom,” she confessed. A lump formed in her throat as she choked back her tears. “It’s been so long, but I miss her every day.”
“Oh, honey, I had no idea.” Mrs. Connelly sniffled. “I mean, I was sure you did, but you never talk about her. You and Mandy were so close—she was your best friend. Of course you miss her. I do, too. We all do.”
Candy’s hand went to her chest, and her heart immediately sank. “Mom, I lost the locket she gave me. That day at the beach—it must’ve fallen off when I fell. For all I know, it’s buried in the sand or washed out to sea. All I know is that it’s gone. The last gift Mandy gave me is gone. I know it shouldn’t matter. I mean, I have so many other things of hers, but I wore that necklace every day for the last thirteen years. I just can’t believe it’s gone.”
“Oh, sweetheart, that necklace meant so much to you.” She paused. “Have you checked with Colin? It could very well be sitting on the floor of his car.”
A flicker of hope lit in Candy’s chest, but it died as quickly as it came. “No, I can’t ask him. We’re not exactly on talking terms right now.”
“What happened?”
Cradling her head in her hand, she sighed. “It’s complicated, Mom. It’s always complicated with him.”
“You know why, don’t you? It’s because you like him.”
Candy scoffed. You like him. Those three words said so much and so little all at the same time. Could liking Colin be enough?
Her chest tightened to think of the way he’d poured out his heart to her last week. Why hadn’t she said something? Why had she let him walk away thinking she didn’t feel something for him, too? She was a coward, that’s why. A coward and a control freak.
She glanced around her bedroom, her gaze landing on her closet. A row of tops hung on matching hangers in a color-coordinated pattern with white on one end, black on the other, and the remaining colors in between. Her dozen pairs of shoes had also been organized and placed neatly by color and style on the shoe rack below. Not a single item was out of place. If only she could keep romance as tidy and compartmentalized as her belongings. Instead, it seemed that love was like melted ice cream, dripping and leaking without care. She couldn’t turn her emotions on and off at will, as much as she wanted to. The way she felt about Colin and how he made her feel in his presence couldn’t be contained either. When she was with him, the joy he brought her seemed to seep into the cracks of her heart, filling them up. When he was gone, it was harder to smile. Especially now when her smile was disfigured.
“Can’t love be easier than this? Why is it so hard and confusing?”
Mrs. Connelly chuckled. “Honey, love is not supposed to be easy. Do you not remember the passage in First Corinthians 13? Love requires you to be patient, kind, not proud, nor self-seeking. Love protects and perseveres. That’s what makes love the most precious gift you can give someone and the most precious one you can receive. If you think about it that way, it makes all the sense in the world why it’s not easy. It means so much more to love someone when it’s hard to love them.”
“Thanks, Mom,” she answered drolly. “I was asking a rhet
orical question.”
“Oops, and there I went giving you half a sermon.” She laughed. “All right, I’m going to go make dinner. I’ll see you in an hour?”
“Sure.”
“And do yourself a favor and change out of your sweats. And brush your teeth. Trust me, you’ll feel better.”
“Anything else you think I should do?” she asked with an eye roll.
“Well, since you asked …”
“I was kidding, Mom. I’ll see you soon.” She paused and added, “Thanks for listening.”
“Anytime, sweetheart. Make sure you brush your hair, too!”
“Bye, Mom!” Candy crooned into the phone before she hung up.
She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror and was surprised to see herself smiling for the first time in a week. The action caused a little tugging feeling above her mouth at the site of the wound, but it didn’t stop her from smiling more. Leave it to her mom to talk some sense—and comfort—into her. Her mom was right though. As much as loving Colin didn’t make sense to her mind, it made perfect sense to her heart. The only question now was if she was brave enough to follow?
Chapter Seventeen
Colin
Colin pulled up to a ranch-style house on the quiet suburban street. Memories flashed across his mind to see the familiar maple trees lining the sidewalk, their branches bare. He spotted his former childhood home across the street from the Connellys, and the upstairs window from where he looked out for “Candy sightings” as Darren used to tease him about. He scoffed under his breath, thinking about how hung up he’d always been on her. That was a side effect of being too optimistic. If he could only tell his eighteen-year-old self what he knew now. That he should’ve tried pursuing a more realistic career path so he wouldn’t be in his current position, being rejected by an older, more successful woman. Sure, he could make Candy laugh, but he couldn’t support a family on humor alone.
Unless he became a comedian.
He turned off the engine and leaned back in his seat as he pondered that option for a split second. Reality set in quick though. He didn’t have time to start a career from scratch. He’d wasted all of his twenties already. Any effort he put in now felt too little, too late.
With a loud sigh, he pulled down the car visor and checked out his appearance in the mirror. When he’d talked to Mrs. Connelly an hour ago, she’d mentioned there was a possibility that Candy would be over when he stopped by to pick up her tax documents. He smoothed his hands over his hair, using his fingers to comb through a cowlick that didn’t want to cooperate. Sighing, he rubbed a hand over the scruff along his face, wishing he’d had time to stop by home to shave first. Oh well. What did it matter anyway? He wasn’t going to impress Candy, no matter how hard he tried.
He closed the visor and made his way out of the car. Twenty steps later, he found himself at the front door of the Connellys, with its no solicitation sign hung above the doorbell. He knocked loudly and pulled back his shoulders. Nervous energy raced through his veins as he waited for the door to open. One would’ve thought he was coming to pick up his date and meet her parents for the first time, not visiting old friends.
The door swung open, and a bald man wearing a blue flannel shirt and jeans beckoned him inside. Mr. Connelly gave him a firm handshake before closing the door. “Colin! I’ve missed seeing you. How are you, son?”
“Fine, sir. Yourself?”
“A lot better now that you’re here to take over our taxes.” He gave a hearty laugh that produced crinkles around his blue eyes. The sound seemed mismatched with his tall, lean frame. “We appreciate you helping us out. Let me ask the missus where she put the paperwork. Why don’t you follow me? We just sat down to dinner and would love to have your company.”
“Thank you, sir.” He cleared his throat as his eyes darted about the cozy living room with a fire going in the brick fireplace and mismatched furniture with crocheted blankets draped across their backs. It’d been a few months since he’d visited the Connellys, but everything looked the same. There was no sign of Candy’s purse or other belongings indicating she was here. He released a sigh of relief as he planned his exit. “I’ve got some leftovers at home calling my name. I’ll just get the paperwork and be on my way.”
Mr. Connelly motioned for Colin to follow as he led the way into the next room where the rich aroma of stewed meat filled the air. He gestured at the dining table set with four placemats, dishware, and utensils. “Candy will be joining us, too,” he remarked in a tone akin to a salesman showing off his new product. “You’re sure you don’t want to stay?”
Colin smirked. Even though Mr. Connelly wasn’t as direct as Candy, he was sure trying hard to get his point across. The invitation was so inviting, especially when paired with the growl of his stomach at the sight of the pot roast Mrs. Connelly carried in to the room. “Hey, Mrs. Connelly. That looks and smells amazing.”
The older woman smiled and set the large dish on the table. She took a step back and wiped her hands on the flowery apron tied around her waist over a dark pair of jeans and a cream sweater. Greeting him with a quick hug, she gave him an approving once-over. “Thank you, dear. When your mom mentioned you were doing taxes again, I was so thrilled. You’re a lifesaver.”
“Naw,” he protested. “Just doing what I need to do to pay the bills.”
“You’ll stay for dinner, won’t you? Candy’s coming.”
Before he could answer, the front door opened and a familiar voice called out, “Hey, Mom and Dad, I’m here.”
Colin’s heart picked up speed. He heard Candy’s voice grow louder as she neared the dining room. Even after the way they had parted, he still had such a soft spot for her. He always would.
“That isn’t Colin’s car parked out front, is it?” she called out again, her tone hesitant.
Mrs. Connelly exchanged a tight smile with her husband before answering, “Hey, sweetheart, we’re in here just about to sit down for dinner.”
“You didn’t answer my—” Candy appeared in the doorway, her face immediately flushing. She turned to face her mom with a wide-eyed look that seemed to accuse and cry for help at the same time. “Mom, can I talk to you, please? Alone?”
“Sure, honey.” She followed Candy out to the living room, a nervous smile on her face.
Mr. Connelly shrugged and gestured for Colin to sit down. “Make yourself at home, son. This is way too much food for just the three of us. I hope you’ll stay.”
“Uh, I don’t know if that’s a good idea. I don’t think Candy’s all that thrilled to see me.”
“I think she’s just upset she didn’t change out of her PJs. I’m sure she would’ve wanted to look her best if she’d known you’d be here.”
“Yeah, sure,” Colin replied, completely unconvinced. It was a rare sight to see Candy in fleece pajamas without a trace of makeup on. He wondered if she’d changed early for bedtime or had just rolled out of bed. Either way, he liked how she looked and was especially relieved to see how well her injuries had healed. Gone were the bruising and swelling; only a red line remained above her lip where her cut had been. “She looks great.” He immediately winced, wondering how Mr. Connelly would take his comment. “I meant that in the most platonic way.”
“No worries, Colin.” He took a seat in one of the chairs closest to him. “I know you mean well. I’ve always liked you—platonically, of course,” he added with a wink. “Sit down and keep me company. The ladies might take a while.”
Colin obliged, taking the seat across from him. He fiddled with the edge of the folded napkin next to his plate. Hushed voices talking quickly in the next room reached his ears. His feet fidgeted under the table, tapping out a rapid rhythm on the wooden floor.
Suddenly Candy and her mom emerged. Mrs. Connelly quickly took the chair next to her husband, leaving Candy no choice but to sit next to Colin. She pulled the heavy wooden chair out and sat down, facing forward.
“Great, I’m starving,” Mr. Connell
y announced as he held out his hands on the table, one to his wife and the other to Colin. “Let’s say grace and eat.”
Colin took the large, weathered hand and then reached out his other one in Candy’s direction. She stared at it for several beats, and he wondered if she would ever take it. Just as he was about to clench it shut, she placed her palm against his. He inhaled quickly as her tapered fingers wrapped around his. The simple touch sent a rush of warmth up his arm. As Mr. Connelly prayed for their meal, Colin held his breath, wishing for the moment to never end. Who knew if he’d ever get to hold her hand again. Unfortunately, it soon came time for them to say amen. Colin felt Candy’s hand slip from his, taking her warmth with her.
Candy immediately picked up her fork and busied herself with the portion of food her mom had scooped onto her plate.
Colin received his own heaping portion and dug in. The spices danced on his taste buds as he savored the homemade dish, creating a stark contrast to the bland hopelessness he felt. He should’ve been happy to be sitting next to Candy and sharing a meal with her parents. The Connellys were like family, people he’d been around for half his life. And Candy, the girl he’d fallen for, was now a beautiful woman he fought the urge to look at, even as she was doing her best to hide her face from him. Wow. It hurt to think she didn’t even want to meet his gaze.
He chewed and swallowed his food as quickly as humanly possible, much like how he’d seen Darren and his crew eat their meals at the firehouse. Thoughts of his brother reminded him of how Candy had gone to Darren for help instead of him that day on the beach. That act still stung. His bite of pot roast went down slowly, paired with a great heaping spoonful of bitterness and regret. It was a bad idea to stay for dinner. Candy didn’t want him here any more than he wanted to be here.
With a quick swipe of his napkin, he wiped his mouth then backed his chair from the table. “Thanks so much for your hospitality, Mr. and Mrs. Connelly, but I’m not really hungry. I’ll work on your taxes first thing tomorrow and give you a call when I finish them,” he added as he stood up.
